Potty Training - Somerset,NJ

Updated on July 21, 2010
C.A. asks from Hightstown, NJ
8 answers

My son just turned three and he's finally gotten the hang of using the potty. However, he only uses the potty at home. At home he uses regular big kid underwear and he uses a small potty. At home he doesn't tell me when he has to use the potty he just goes. When we travel or go to my mother's house, I usually put a pull up on him to avoid any mess. However, he considers the pull up to be a diaper and just goes in the pull up, and doesn't ask to go potty. Also at night he isn't able to hold it through the night. I've tried the huggies good nights, but he always ends up wetting the bed. So, I end up using diapers at night. I don't know if this is confusing him. How do I transition him to using other bathrooms? I would really like him to be fully potty trained by the end of the summer because he starts preschool in Sept. Should I just buy one of those portable potties. Thanks. Please help!!

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answers from New York on

yes i used a portable potty and it was the best moeny I have ever spent! It was a life saver when potty training. We have 2...one for my car and one for my husbands. When I potty trained my twins, I did not use pull ups...I read that they were too confusing and decided not to use them. For us it worked...my son took a few weeks more than my daughter but in under a month was trained. This was at 2 years one month...they wanted it, I did NOT push it at all. My son needed diapers at night for about another 8-10 months but now sleeps through the night. They both wanted those big boy/girl underwear so badly and they knew the only way they were getting them was if they used the potty. I made a big deal about going to the store and picking them out... I used the good night diapers and told him they were oly for night time to try not to confuse him. I showed him the moon on the package and the stars and talked up the night time factor as much as I could. Once he started to wake up dry (for 3 nights) I immediately stopped putting them on him and never went back...if he had an accident I dealt with it...he was done with diapers and he had to deal with it too (he hated wearing them) Make sure he goes to the bathroom before bed and try to limit what he drinks. We stopped drinking after dinner and this made a big difference. I hope this helps. definately invest int he traveling potty. We still use it on road trips and when we are out and about and not near a bathroom.



answers from New York on

If you MUST use the Pull Up while figuring it all out, put a pair of his big boy underwear under the Pull Up. He won't like the wet feeling at all. Once he figures that out, he'll use the potty. And then you will be all set.

I also agree to stop using the little potty and go for the regular old one.

Good luck!!



answers from New York on

Dear C.,

The solution is actually really simple.: don't avoid the mess! Ditch the pull-ups, put him in underwear, prepare for 1-3 days of accidents, and you'll be done. When my son was making the transition, we allowed pull-ups in the car and at night, and that was it. On day 1, he literally had about six accidents. I just put the peed-in underwear in the laundry and the pooped-in underwear in the garbage. On day 2, I swear, he was potty-trained. He's had maybe four accidents, ever, since.

The underlying truth is that words don't change behavior. Experiences change behavior. You can tell your son to use the potty all you want, but he's going to go with his past experience of going in his pull-ups, which has never been a problem. Just change the experience to going in his pants, which does feel like a problem, and you're there. That may sound harsh, but it really isn't. It's a way to potty train without ANY scolding or conflict, with only positive feedback. Give it a try.

Best wishes,




answers from New York on

It's fine to continue diapering at night. I wouldn't use a pullup at your mom's. Put him in cloth training pants with waterproof outer layer and take him to the toilet periodically. Don't wait for him to ask to go when you're at someone's house or out and about. Don't assume he knows there's a bathroom there that he is supposed to use. I wouldn't bother with a portable potty, he is old enough to use a toilet. In school, they likely will not have potties but regular toilets. My kids never used a potty at all, btw.



answers from Canton on

Yeah, in my opinion pull-ups are just another diaper.My middle daughter wasn't fully potty trained until she was almost four!! I don't think you're confusing him at all. You're doing pretty much the same things I've done with my kids. I did however to cloth training pants (with a cover) when we'd go out, grandma's, store, etc. If you don't want to get a wet bag just use a plastic bag. I never had any good luck with the Gerber covers though. I would get covers from an actual cloth diaper website if possible. He'll probably just progress at his own pace. I suppose though since he's starting pre-school this is why you need/want to encourage it more eh? I guess just keep pushin' it. Maybe the cloth will work since he will actually be able to feel the wetness. Good luck.



answers from New York on

ditch the pull-ups. We just potty trained our 3 year old son and threw out the diapers/pull-ups, everything, cold turkey. He's been great, doesn't even wet the bed. He does have accidents when we're out, but that's my fault due to forgetting to ask him if he's got to use the bathroom.....am hoping that gets better soon. Anyway, I think pull-ups are just confusing for kids.



answers from New York on

We usually took the small potty with us if we were staying any place new for a few days. On regular outings (shopping etc) I would support my daughter over the toilet (she was much smaller though), by the time she was 3 her bum was big enough that we didn't have to worry about her falling into the toilet anymore :D

Help your son feel comfortable pottying in other places--first thing when you arrive, show him the toilet, let him go in and explore a little (maybe wash his hands and gargle in the sink). If you feel the need to use the toilet, ask him to join you and "try". Periodically remind him where the potty is (or at his age asking may work better--"B can you show me where the toilet is. Give it a try while you're here."

Nighttime can be tricky--some kids pee after their first REM cycle (if he goes to bed around 8 then maybe about 9:30 or 10 he may partially wake up and pee in his diaper) and others go really early just before getting out of bed--you know the feeling the bed is warm and comfy . . . have get up to pee, but the bed is so comfy . . . have to UH OH (granted YOU probably don't do the UH OH part, but the thought is the same :D) With my girl, a night time potty trip worked great--we watched her night time cycles and figured out she tended to be a 10-11 pm pee-er, so my (night owl) husband would take her to the potty when she started sleep crawling around the bed. For early morning pee-ers getting up just a bit before them and taking them to the potty as soon as they get restless can help them get into a routine.



answers from Atlanta on

It's time to get rid of the baby potty and go on the big one. Other places don't have baby potties so he can't go other places. He needs to use a big potty at home and elsewhere.

Also, ditch the pull up while traveling and take extra clothes instead. As long as he has a pull up on, he will go in it. Going in your clothes feels bad and he needs that feeling to stop doing that. It's annoying to change his clothes 2 or 3 times a day but it won't last long.

At night you can keep doing a pull up a little longer but no more diaper. Use the ones that have the tingly feeling when wet so he can feel the difference and get up and go in the potty or change his own pull up in the night when his is wet. Leave them out in the bathroom with a night-light on so he doesn't have to wake you up.

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