Potty Training - Washington, DC

Children know when they are ready! As said in one of the other responses, girls seem to get a hold of potty training before boys, but boys seem to be more verbal about what they've done. My son will be 4 in May and became an active participant in potty training in the past 6 months and has done very well with #1 and #2! My daughter will be 3 in June and began using the potty almost 1 year ago. She has accidents and is inclined not to mention that she has to go or that she has gone. My son will announce quite clearly that he needs to go and gets upset when he has accidents.

A.J.

Hmmm, I don't believe the books. Mainly because every person is different and has different needs. Now, having said that, I think it's great to get some opinions of what has worked for other people. Whether it is from books, talking to other people at the playground or posting to this site... it's great to learn from other's experiences because you may find some advice that you wouldn't have thought of. I suggest you read a few articles (I like Parent's magazine). I imagine you can get some info online and the library, rather than spend money on one book. I bought a few discipline books before I realized each author has their own opinion and not all are the right answers for me and my kids.

Now, the actual problem... whether to train or not. My daughter just switched to underwear at 33 months and she's doing great. She has occasional accidents, usually because she's caught up in something (playing outside or visiting someone and playing with a bunch of new toys). Her sister switched to diapers at 33 months too and did great. Here's what we did...

1. Put a little potty in your bathroom. When I would go to the bathroom, she would follow me in and talk to me or bring me things. So, I would say, do you want to sit on your potty while Mommy sits on hers? At first she'd do it in her clothes and with the lid down which we didn't discuss much.

2. When she needs a diaper change, we would do it in the bathroom. We used pull-up diapers and talked about how they were big kid diapers and how they pull up just like underwear.

3. When she has a bowel movement, dump the poop in the potty and let her flush it. Say things like, big kids poops in the potty so we can flush it away and not have to smell it. Do you want to be the one to flush your poop? She eventually would insist that we put the poop in the toilet. Then I would say, ok, now you poop on your potty. She was so regular that I would know what time of day she would be most likely to be successful.

4. Start discussing underwear and how cool it is to be a big kid and get to pick out your own underwear. Talk about some of the cool things you can have on your undewear and how fun it will be to get some when your ready to use the potty.

5. Once they are successful in the potty and able to keep their diapers fairly dry, you're ready to let them switch.

It sounds like a lot more than 3 days but really you're just conditioning them while they are still in diapers and not really ready for the underwear. Also, it's very important to dress them in clothes they can handle on their own. If you are really ready to do it, you can let them just run around in their underwear for a few days till they learn.

We're in the process of trying to switch from the little potty to the big one. It requires her to get there a little earlier since it takes some time and effort to set up the step stool and potty seat.

I wish you the best luck and hope this helps. I hope you read a few potty training methods before you start so you can see what works best for your son. I wouldn't let age determine when you train, base it on your son's response.

Liz

p.s. My friend had only a few days to train her daughter (requirement for preschool) so she let her run around in just a shirt for 2-3 days. She hated the feeling of pee on her legs so she was forced to learn to use the potty fast. Since there were no clothes to soil (naked from the waist down) my friend only had to clean up the floors. It worked for her, but she was under high stress to make the cut off.

I have not tried that book. However, my daughter now 3 was potty trained by 20 months. She started standing outside the bathroom when she had to go at 16 months. We started training her at about 18 months and by 20 months she was potty trained all day. I think if he is showing signs of readiness you should try it. It isn't a matter of age but readiness. Good luck.

I have not read the book, however if he is ready to be potty trained, go for it. It takes a lot of patience and understanding on your part. Make it a big deal for him to wear big boy underwear and make him feel like he is a star. Stickers don't work, candy... um no. Just tell him you are so proud of him and it makes you so happy to see him like a big boy. That is all it took with my daughter. Good Luck.

First off, let me just say don't try puching him in any way. My son showed signs of want to use the toliet at 16 months, so we tried and he did really good for a month and then he didn't want to do it anymore. I didn't push, because we were PCSing to the Eastcoast from the Westcoast. Once we had move and got settled in it was easier. We bought the Elmo's Potty time DVD and he would sit on his potty watching Elmo and he would go. Then I would ask him about every 15-20 min. if he had to go and I would put him on the potty he caught on pretty quick. We arrived in VA in Dec. 06 and he was potty trained completly by March 07. Good Luck!

I heard about that "3 day Potty training" too. It sounds great.I think that if your son is telling you, just give him some potty training underpants and put him on the pot.

I would say go for it. My daughter was a little over 2, but she was completely potty trained within a week without accidents. We did an intense weekend and I will forward you some tips I got from a friend. You have one, so it will be much easier to concentrate on him. I have 2 and the other is an infant, so it was tough, but she was ready. This worked extremely well, but you may have to tweak what you use as incentives. Hope this helps.

Before you start the training, collect the following:

1. potty
2. treats. I used cheetohs, corn chips, snax mix, lucky charms (just the charms), marshmallows, m&ms, mini oreo cookies
3. lots of drinks. I used orange soda, apple juice & grape juice in juice boxes because they are "special," and chocolate milk
4. training pants. I think I used 6-8 pairs. Be prepared to wash them every evening for the first few days.
5. a list of "fans": Nana, Daddy, friends and anybody else that will be "so excited" about what a big girl she is. I found it helpful to make the list because I could throw a unique one in every now and then, including "Steve" or "Joe" from Blues Clues.
6. a timer, stop watch or clock
7. lots of old towels for clean up. And I laid a tarp over my carpet the first week with a soft flannel sheet on top of the tarp.
8. doll with potty
9. possibly (this is known to work with girls) special pretty underwear to use as incentive
10. Lots of books to read on the potty (the author doesn't approve of this, but we couldn't have gotten through training without them)
11. A laundry basket at child's reach so that she can clean up after herself if she has an accident


The night before, tell her that tomorrow's going to be a great day because she's going to give up the diapers and be a big girl. Be really enthusiastic about how much fun it's going to be (you have to lie) and how proud you are etc. etc.

Day 1
Make sure the house is warm enough to walk around half naked.

1. Dress her right in training pants and a short shirt, right out of bed. (I had trouble with this step! He didn't want to wear the pants. But all the other mothers I've talked to said this wasn't a problem. If it is, don't let it deter you. Just let her walk around "bottomless.")
2. Have a protein-rich breakfast because she'll be getting lots of carbs throughout the morning. AND start giving her lots of drinks right away.
3. Tell her she's going to teach the doll how to use the potty. Let her give the baby a bottle and put it on the potty. Let her feel the stream of "pee" coming out of the doll. Praise the doll and give it a treat. But then Lydia gets to eat the treat. Let the baby have an "accident" and show the difference between "wet" and "dry." Emphasize that the new big-girl pants should not get wet. Make the doll "practice" running to the potty a few times after the "accident." Remind her that no treats come after wetting pants.
4. Now start Lydia. Give her another drink. Get her to feel her pants. Dry? Givea treat. Wet? Practice running to the potty from different locations in the house. Check for dry pants about every 10 minutes and reward with a treat and a drink. Lots of drinks.
5. Every 25 minutes or so, have her sit on the potty for 5-10 minutes. If nothing happens, let her get down, but stay right next to her so that if she starts peeing, you can whisk her off to the potty midstream. Do the wet/dry check and remind her that wet pants are not good. Practice running to the potty a few times from different locations. If she manages to pee on the potty, reduce the sitting time.
6. Never leave her side (this is the hard part). Because if she starts having an accident, you need to get her to the potty as soon as possible so that there can be at least 1/2 success getting pee in the potty.
8. Stay cool. There might be three accidents in a row. Don't scold; just remind her wear the pee goes. Have a "that's ok -- maybe next time" approach.
9. If pee goes in the potty, go nuts. Offer a super-special treat and hugs, kisses etc. Talk about all the people who are going to be so proud of her.

This is basically it. Put a pull-up on her for naptime, and replace immediately with pants when she wakes up. I didn't do a lot of the other stuff the guy recommended, but this was enough.

Decide never to turn back. No more diapers except at naptime and night. If she asks for a diaper, just say, "oh, we're all done with diapers now." or "No, remember? We're going to give (gave) the diapers away."

Day 2
1. Continue to reward every 15-20 minutes for dry pants. Put her on the potty every 30 - 40 minutes depending on how much she's had to drink. If poop is a problem, offer a huge reward (ice cream for us). Gradually phase out rewards for using the potty and just reward for dry pants.

Day 3
1. Reward for dry pants every hour. Instead of taking her to the potty, remind her or make a suggestion and see what happens. She might go if reminded.

B.

Hi Y.,

Just be patient. He will come around soon.

Throw about the book.

There is nothing wrong with you or the baby.

Hope this helps. D.

My mother-in-law always brags about the fact that my husband was 100% potty-trained by the time he was 18 months. My husband always rolls his eyes and tells me that he thinks that is the reason he has such problems now. If he even smells food -- he has to go. ha ha. I guess the moral of the story is follow your kid's lead and don't push too hard if he resists.

Boys are notorious for potty training later than girls. Example: My youngest two children (I have 5 children) are a girl 3 years old and a boy 4 years old. They were potty trained at the same time! My daughter virtually potty trained herself, while my son needed LOTS of help. This was just fall of last year! My son still wets the bed a lot more often than my daughter. He'll get it though. They all do it in their own time. But your son telling you after the fact is the first step. He's now becoming aware that he should doing it somewhere other than his pants! LOL Baby steps....

My advice to you is to put a potty in an area of the house where you spend the most time and start introducing him to the potty. I talked to my oldest (4) about the potty and told her when she wanted to that she could sit on the potty and go. I told her (and showed) how to take off her clothes and how to be seated on the potty. She learned to become comfortable with the potty. Sometimes she would sit on it with her clothes on (I would gently discourage her) and others without. I believe children need to get comfortable with the potty first. Then you need to ask the child frequently if they need to go (eventually) they will do it. Try getting the child shortly after a meal or nap when he/she is likely to go. If your child doesn't seem to get it or isn't interested you should wait a month or so and try again. I personally don't believe in the "rush" potty training. I do think the Elmo potty video helps to get children interested in pottying. Whatever you do, "try" to be as patient as possible and don't get upset with the child. You don't want them to connect being wrong or chided with going to the potty. Some parents bribe their kids with candy, stickers, or toys. I simply give mine lots of praise for going. Every child is different though, some are ready earlier than others.

Don't rush - take your time. He'll get there. When he tells you and he's already gone, say "uh oh", bring him to the potty, dump it in and say "poop poos go in the potty." Or something to that effect. And flush it down and clean him up. He'll catch on faster than you know. My son did this at 18 months and had himself potty trained within a week (he's now almost 5). My daughter, on the other hand, still has accidents and she's almost 7. Hopefully the baby (11 mo.) will be as easy as my son! :) When they are ready, they are ready. Books are great for tips and ideas, but watch your child and make decisions that work for him. Good luck!

Hi,

I have three boys, and the first two trained at about that time. They both showed an interest and I just followed it. I didn't look at the three day book, and it took longer, but it was something they were interested in. I did talk w/someone who had four older kids at that time, and she said then that she had heard that there seems to be a window w/some kids then, and if you can follow it along, that is great. Either way, you'll need the potty, so it won't be a waste of money, and the book can be borrowed from the library, I would guess. I certainly felt apprehensive when my first wanted to do that, but looking back, I'm glad I followed his lead. Just don't sweat it, as much as possible, and try to give him as many opportunities as he wants and the ones that fit into your timeframe too. I always did the "it's time to go potty now" around naptimes and waking times and before bed times. If they went, great, and if not, no big deal. They always wore a diaper at night for a while anyway. And I have read not to push or withhold fluids, as you want their bodies to get used to doing what they need to do w/the amount they are used to drinking. Best wishes, A.

I'm not sure about the book but here are some signs.
1. Can he pull down his pants
2. Dose he stand when he pees in the tub ( my son dose it's so funny)
3. Is he dry for more than 2 hours at a time.
I would suggest getting a potty chair and at lease have it expose to him right now. My son likes to be naked even in this cold weather. Well being naked has helped him notice more things happening with his body. Like peeing. Potty training hasd not happened in our home yet but I come from nine siblings and I'm only #2. Everyone in my home was potty trained by 18 month but I can say my son is not he just turned 18 months. So it all really depends if you have a couple days in a row to help him get the flow.Thats what I'm waiting for. When I have like a whole weekend and a couple days off!