Peaceful Approach to Improved Bathroom Hygiene for 5 Yr Old Boy

Updated on September 08, 2009
S.A. asks from Rutherford, NJ
7 answers

Hi Mamas,
Can anyone give me some good advice on helping my 5 year old boy transition to independently cleaning himself after pooping? Last year I tried coercion, then tried hard and fast 'just do it yourself' and both were met with strong stubborn resistance. He has naturally gravitated to independence in the bathtub and other areas, but this one is tough. He's anxious about being dirty.

Just caught a glimpse of the nanny show where the mother of a 7 year old was facing the same and realized that would be me and my son 2 years from now if we keep at this pace. Are there any effective techniques that are peaceful in transitioning him to clean himself or even motivating him to want to do it?

Thanks Mamas!

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A.D.

answers from New York on

Dear S., My most recent experience with this issue is my grandson, now 10. All he needed was to get one bad rash frm not cleaning properly and he became more careful. We bought him wipes and told him to use as many as needed to be cean. You could let him pick out his own wipes. They also come in travel packs to take to school, although I see that my grandson tries to wait until he gets home if he can. Hope this helps! Grandma Mary

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N.D.

answers from New York on

They sell wipes for toddlers to clean themselves. Buy some, show him how to use them and then ignore him. If he doesnt like being dirty he will figure it out. Dont do it for him any more, even if it grosses you out.

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D.

answers from New York on

We told my 5 yr old that big boys wipe their own hineys. Just let him know that when he's done he can call you and you will check him to make sure he's clean.

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J.M.

answers from New York on

We told our son that his job was to "stick your bottom way out and get 3 wipes clean." That means wipe and then when it is clean three times in a row, you are done. That helped him better understand his goal and really know whether the job was done or not.
Our oldest was always nervous about getting messy hands. But that seemed to work.
Good luck!

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L.R.

answers from New York on

Hi.

I have twins that are five 1/2. I know what you mean :0)

what I did to get them to wipe themselves... I had them wipe with toilet paper (and keep wiping till the paper was clean... meaning little or no poop) and then have them follow that up with a toddler wipe (as the final step in the process).

If you child is resistant because he feels he'll get "dirty" then you might just have him use more paper... he could wrap the toilet paper around his hand several times or you could have him use a certain number of "tiles" to wipe with.

it took awhile... but over time the boys became more confident and do it by themselves.

GOOD LUCK (to you both)

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A.D.

answers from New York on

I think the wipes are a good idea, but 5 is still young, my daughter is 6 and she's still not super coordinated when it comes to wiping. She does wipe herself, but sometimes she'll have me check, and she does a better job some days than others. Encourage him to do as much as possible himself, but let him know he can call you to check if he needs it.

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J.C.

answers from New York on

I have a similar issue with my son who is now 7...he will wipe but if he is a hurry the job is not done well. He will have irritation which we call "itchy tushy" and it did get bad once where he was in pain. So we now discuss why he needs to wipe well and not to rush...no matter what is going on in school or on TV...if he doesn't wipe well he will get "itchy tushy" and that will be painful. When he started school we also talked about how if he doesn't wipe well he would smell and that helped him slow down and wipe. I also have the moist flushable wipes in the bathroom so it is easier for him. We still have some accidents but not as much as when he was younger. This will come with maturity...good luck.

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