Oh My Goodness Is Nowhere Safe!?

Updated on September 20, 2011
M.B. asks from Clearwater, FL
12 answers

Last night there was a shooting near my apartments, 2 people were killed and 1was injured. The suspect wasn't caught and what's scary is this morning I went to go drop my son off at the bus stop in the front of my apartments and there's a LOT of blood! It scared me to death! I took my son home and my husband was late to work because we drove him. I saw that this morning and thought "oh my gosh this monster lives in my complex!" and the worst part the children who live here were talking about shooting each other and pretending to fall near the puddles. It's scary. I did call the police and report the blood and told them I did t know if it was related to what happened last night or not, but felt like I should. My question is what would you do if you saw something like that? Anyhow do you explain it to your children?
Let me add unfortunatly moving isn't an option because we just moved here and don't have the thousands it would cost to break our lease...

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So What Happened?

About him riding the bus he doesn't go to the bus stop alone I walk him, and I'm there when he gets home. I can drive him if i take my husband to work which is what I'm going to start doing! The bus stop is right outside the gate and the blood was in front of the office but outside the locked gate.
@Lynn if I had thousands to spare I would be out in a second! But not an
Option...and no the area isn't as bad as your making it sound it's usally pretty quiet.
And the news is saying it's gang related. There are gang everywhere. I lived in Scottsdale Az which is a very nice part if phoenix and there was a drug house right next door...sigh it's just like everywhere has something
@Jo no we dont have section 8 housing, just the opposite we live in pretty expensive apartments, that are only a few years old. We barely quilified due to the income requirements...

Featured Answers



answers from Orlando on

Ok, I live in the Orlando area too - AND, not to be rude but where the shooting happened is a VERY BAD AREA! I would break the lease and move. That whole area over there is bad, bad, bad. I had a friend that lived over there and there were shootings all the time! This is not a "nice area with no crime" where these shootings happened. It's very common over there and well known.

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answers from Houston on

Ok, if moving isn't an option and your son has to keep riding the bus, you are going to have to let your child face reality a little bit. Start teaching/training him to know what to do if someone starts acting funny or eratic around him. Get him into a child's self defense program. Teach him how to yell "no" really loud. What are his options if he's waiting at the bus stop and that starts happening? Is there a nearby business or store he can go to? Does he know your phone numbers? Will he know how to discern eratic behavior and what isn't? I know that's alot of a kid to determine on his own, but he's going to have to face it sometime if he is riding the bus.

If it were me, I'd go to the school immediately, talk to the teacher and get a class list, and then call up other parents and find out if anyone can take drive my child to school, per the teacher's recommendation. I'd offer to drop my kid off at their house and pay them for gas. Surely there are other parents willing to carpool?

Be safe!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Philadelphia on

I do not believe any where is truly safe. I live in a fairly affluent neighborhood. Home Land Security was staked out in front of my house in the spring... Long story short my neighbor who lives across the street with his wife and 2 school age daughters was arrested for running an Asian prositiution ring in the next county over. My sister lives in a upper middle class neighborhood and just had a registered sex offender move in next door to her. The million dollar+ neighborhood behind my development has a registered sex offender living there too. It is a scary world!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Minneapolis on

When I was very young, my family lived in an area like this. My mother never let me catch the bus, ever. My parents drove me to and from school (the school wasn't much better). I was not allowed to play outside, and all playdates were at our home unless my parents took me directly to the friend's house, and only if they knew the parents well enough to trust they would also keep us inside instead of playing in the line of fire.

Even my mother avoided being out and about as much as possible. She had problems with some men in a house by us, and had a close call. As soon as was possible, we moved and never looked back.

Bottom line, shelter your child. Even with that, you can't guarantee safety in a place like this. We had a break-in while we were all home, and shots fired at the house all the time for no reason except that our house was in the way of something going on the street that day.

As another suggested, breaking the lease may not be a bad idea in the big scheme of things if it's really that bad. It gets nerve wracking and old very quickly if you have to live in fear and worry that something might happen despite taking every precaution to be safe.

I also agree with the other poster who said to educate your child on what to do if you're not around. Sadly, your child is going to have to develop street smarts. You can't be with them all day. There is the time away at school and other unexpected scenarios. Honesty is the best and wisest possibility. You don't have the luxury of doling out the bad news on a case by case basis. You're going to have to get the facts on the table about street life and dangers, so your child can avoid these situations and people. In areas like that, criminals and dehornes have no love of children. They exploit them all of the time, and have no concern of accidentally hurting a child when they fire off guns mindlessly in the streets.

Hang in there.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from St. Louis on

time to move, but even small towns have issues. & yet, think about the Wild West & medieval times! Violence has always been present in our society....

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answers from Washington DC on

YOu did the right thing.
Was it a drug related shooting? Or gang related? **sigh**
It seems to be everywhere, even in the small towns.

Depending on the age I would be as honest as possible. Mine are now 10, 13, and 16. So, because of their age, I can speak very openly about gang violence and the ramiifications of being involved in gangs, drugs, and the like.
If they are smaller than I would be honest but give very little info when they ask, sort of glaze over it.

Make sure you are safe
Get ADT if you can
Be vigilant,
Don't go out alone in the dark

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Atlanta on

Violence can happen anywhere! I grew up in a very small, sleepy southern town where most didn't lock doors and kids roamed freely with no worry. Everyone knows and is kinned to everyone. The year I was 11, a woman was found at the entrance to the county dump with her breasts cut off. A few months later upon returning from the movies, I waljed in on a huge man in my parent's bedroom who was robbing us, and he jumped through a window and fled. Neither criminal was ever caught, and one was a particularly nasty murderer who obviously lived among us. Ypu just never know!

If, as another person says, you live in an awful area then yes -expect this type of thing more. Be vigilant until you can move and don't let your kid go to the bus stop on his own. Talk very openly and honestly with him about drugs and crime.



answers from Pittsburgh on

I think we can all point out areas of the cities we live in as "bad" areas. But the truth is, crime is everywhere. Some places may be safER but nowhere is completely safe to the point that we can stop being vigilant.
As for reporting the blood to the police--you did the right thing.
As for leaving the bus stop ad driving your child to school--you did the right thing. I would have done what you did.
I'm not sure how old your son is but it's definitely time to have a talk with him about the violence that can happen, the justice system, why people might act like this (drugs, alcohol, gangs, etc.) ON HIS level...obviously you'll tell a 5 year old different things than a 12 year old.
Sorry this happened in your area. :(



answers from Canton on

I was just thinking this last night. We live in a town that has been going down hill pretty quick. But we live about 8 - 10 blocks from where most of the crime usually happens. I thought we had atleast a year before the crime started creeping in to our neighborhood so I knew we needed to move but thought we had a little bit. But last night we were sitting in the living room watching TV around 9:30 and we heard a loud noise and then 3 more. They were definately gun shots - it sounded like it came from our back yard. Our neighbor called and reported it and we saw a few cops driving around but I don't think they ever found anything.
I don't really have an answer to your question but I just wanted to let you know I feel the same way. I don't think anywhere is safe anymore. I heard on the radio this morning that you should assume every teenager is armed and dangerous. I'm starting to think thats true.

Have a great day!


answers from St. Louis on

Sorry if this sounds cynical but you must have section 8 housing in your complex. It has become a thing renters really need to check out because the amount of rent doesn't matter. They pay up to 3,000 a month rent in some areas.

We have an apartment complex a couple miles from our house that has section 8. Thankfully the crime seems to stay in the complex. Here it the relevant bit, a couple years ago a Cardinal baseball player rented in there, no one told him there was section 8. So apparently even with a staff not everyone checks that. :(


answers from Providence on

Geez. I remember my mother telling me that while my father and her were living in Miami, they had their security guard get shot by someone in their apartment. Luckily they were able to move.

No place is actually crime-proof. If I saw something like this in my neighborhood, I would be just as freaked out by it as you are. Children should never be exposed to violence. Unfortunatley, it happens, and when it hits close to home, it makes you think twice about where you live.

I would ask if their would be a way for a patrolmen to be stationed near your apartment building. If their is gang activity there, they should be there to watch out for it, and keep the place secure and safe. Security cameras, alarms, might help you feel more comfortable. An alarm sensored light, or something that the building could install to help with security measures. I would talk to the apartment's manager and see what can be done on their end to make things more secure for the people who live there.



answers from Youngstown on

What would I do if I saw that? Honestly, I would move.

You did the right thing by calling the police. I don't know how to explain that to children. Its so sad that anyone would have to explain a shooting and blood to a child. Good luck.

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