Oddest Question About What You Do When You Go Number 2 - Spring Branch,TX

Updated on April 10, 2012
J.✰. asks from Spring Branch, TX
34 answers

I most often read a magazine while I'm sitting on the pot going number two. When no magazine is in the bathroom, I grab the nearest shampoo bottle and read it. I don't know why for sure - perhaps because my parents potty trained me by sitting a book on my lap until I peed in the potty??

My husband and MIL don't read books, don't read magazines, nothing! MIL says "I just go in there, do my business, and get out." I am thinking "Yes, but you're in there for 20 minutes, don't you get bored?" I don't say such things aloud though. :)

So I am just curious, what do you do??
- Nothing? And don't you get bored??
- Read a magazine?
- Read a book? (I do NOT read books very often b/c I only get a chance to read a few pages until I'm done. I never never read a library book because I just think that's rude/gross. Thanks Seinfeld episode where George took the book into the bathroom!)
- Play a game? (I used to do Sudoku. I now have a $5 handheld Tetris game. I did catch my husband (heard him) playing with the Tetris game the other day while he was in the potty.)
- Text people? (Caught my husband doing that the other day too. I don't have enough people to text, so generally don't do that while on the pot)

And why do some people have to read and some people just sit there 'taking care of business' and doing nothing? Is it just the way we were trained??

What can I do next?

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So What Happened?

@Molly - I am getting the disinfecting spray NOW for my keyboard and mouse! HA!

@Johanna - HILARIOUS!!!!

@Dana - what a personality in that cat of yours!
I am so surprised that so far, many of you are in and out. True it may take me 5 minutes or less, then when I am enthralled with a magazine article or a wicked game of Tetris, I will stay in there for ten minutes.

I may have exaggerated my MILs time. Maybe 15 minutes? Maybe ten? I hear at least one courtesy flush!

Added: You ladies are cracking me up. I am glad to know I am not the only one who will read anything within reach - shampoo bottles or tampon instructions included. :) Grandma T - how do you know he twiddles his thumbs? Aria - good point about getting some alone time. And yes, I do take longer just because I can at home. In a public place, if my body has to go #2, I am in, I am out, very very quick. Aunt Mel - Your #2 time sounds like mine. I am always having to talk to my almost 4 yr old thru our makeshift door (we don't have actual doors on our bathroom yet. Just a piece of carboard-like-material to give the bathroom-goer some privacy.) I've had to tell my son to NOT push it over. "Mommy needs some privacy!" (play Tetris/read Redbook). ) Thanks for the Saturday night smiles!

More added: I actually don't have a fiber issue. I go in, am technically "done" within the minute or two, but sometimes I want to beat my score on Tetris so will go for the setting where you see how many lines/points you can get in two minutes. So today I was in there 6 minutes - two for actually going, four for sitting there playing the game, making sure I was completely done. HA!

Featured Answers

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K.C.

answers from Norfolk on

My theory is that you know you're a "man" when you can poop when the need arises, take 30 mins, have the door locked and no one bothers you. You know you're a "mother" when you poop when it's convenient for everyone else, can be in and out in three minutes, don't even consider shutting the door (because that just invites little intruders), and have absolutely no privacy.

And I totally read whatever I can get my hands on. Usually a book or magazine, but I have resorted to shampoo bottles and tampon pamphlets, which I find much more entertaining!

8 moms found this helpful
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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

Okay this may sound weird but anytime I go into the bathroom at home I take a longer time than usual. Why? Well I have two kids and the bathroom is the ONLY room in my house that I have peace and quiet. When I go in there no small child under 4 feet is going to ask me to come see this, wipe that - Ahhhhh Simple peace and quiet and if I have to sneak off into the bathroom for 5-10 minutes I will do it. I usually read while I'm in there. Unfortunately where I used to finish a book in a few days it now takes me weeks.

If it's in public restroom its in and out because they are typically gross.

6 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from New York on

I also look for something to read. Whether it be a magazine, the shampoo bottle, the toothpaste, whatever is within arms reach.

3 moms found this helpful

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J.G.

answers from New York on

What a great question for Saturday night! Like Ariamom, I also use the potty like a little mommy-time-out. I have a stash of magazines- Parents, Parenting, Better Gardens. Generally they go from my mailbox to the bathroom. I'll read a couple of paragraphs while I'm in there. Funny story, I was in the hospital a few weeks ago and had to bring a mag. in with me to go! I will read anything available.

3 moms found this helpful
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T.F.

answers from San Diego on

I thought I was the only one that read shampoo bottles while going #2. LOL! I am also guilty of texting while in there. But, I don't spend 20 mins in there more like 5.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Detroit on

It doesn't take me 20 minutes to do #2 - it's more like 20 seconds! I am not in there long enough to need to read anything!

3 moms found this helpful
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S.Q.

answers from Bellingham on

I'm in and out. No reading. And 20 minutes!!?

3 moms found this helpful

R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

I'm usually in and out, no longer to do that than to do #1. Unless "it's " being stubborn then I will grab a magizine that's near by for my husband or a shampoo bottle also to distract me.

Now my husband is literly in there 20 mins! If its stubborn its atleast a half hour. He is nice enough to ask all of us first but sometimes at that min we don't have to... but with in the time he is in there is a line waiting for him to come out! He does read while he is in there, but he says as soon as he is done he puts the magizine away, flushes, washes hands and is out.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Austin on

I also read just about anything......shampoo, toothpaste, cleaner, whatever is handy........ sometimes it is just an "escape" ....

btw...... my hubby is the Building Engineer for a local medical plaza... and it is amazing how many Kindles and Nooks he finds in the public stalls! He is usually able to match them back up with the owner, but one took almost a month.... the e-mail listed in the registration section (he will turn them on and write down any pertinent info, like name, e-mail, etc.) was to the woman's junk mail account! (She left behind a Nook Color.... ouch!) He usually finds them sitting on the toilet paper dispenser....

Be sure you have FULL information (full name, working e-mail, phone number) if you have an E-Reader.

ETA to add (although most aren't still reading this question).... when I read the shampoo bottles, etc... I play the "Alphabet" game!

2 moms found this helpful
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M.T.

answers from Nashville on

I do nothing - doing something distracts me. I am in there to do my business and get out - not to spend a vacation and relax!

2 moms found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Our bathrooms 'other' name is 'the library'.

2 moms found this helpful

M..

answers from Detroit on

Well, since you asked

I usually go at the same time every morning. I bring my coffee with me, and I have a magazine basket in my bathroom, and I always read a magazine.

I need to update my magazines because I have read them all! So I have been texting. Gross. I cannot just sit there and do nothing.

Tibit I heard one the radio this morning.... Your computer mouse is 50xs more filthy than your toilet. Sick huh?

2 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Oh, I am a reader. The potty is my sanctuary, with 2 little boys I go in there as often as I can to read or play handheld solitaire. I can easily be in there 30 mins or more if DH is home - if the kids see me, they bother me and DH won't take the initiative to give me a break, so I have to do it myself!

Like you, I can only get 4-5 pages read at a time, but those pages add up!

2 moms found this helpful

C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

no I do not read anything. It has never taken me more than a couple minutes to do my business and get out, lol! I can't imagine having to sit there longer than needed. If I want to read a book, I wait until the kids are in bed and I chill on the couch and read all night

2 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I grew up in a house where the only place you had peace or privacy was the bathroom. I used to regularly go into our half bath, lock the door, sit on the rug and read. When I'm in there for business, I have a Sudoku or crossword book. "The business" doesn't take long, but I'll steal a few extra minutes of peace and privacy to work on a puzzle.

2 moms found this helpful

A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

In and out...no time to read or anything like that.

But then the only time anyone has anything important to tell me is when I'm in the bathroom. I can't even number 2 in peace! "mom, mom, MOMMMMMMM!" Seriously? Why?

2 moms found this helpful
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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

I just go in and take care of business, pull up my pants to make sure I look great and then wash my hands.....all in under 60 seconds!

My daughter brings her iPhone with her most of the time!

1 mom found this helpful
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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

It's a must read for me.
What a strange and interesting question.
I WILL be bringing this up at my next BFF girlfriend outing!

After reading some answers. It is NOT a question of time.

Two minutes...I will still grab the book, mag or shampoo bottle not matter what. Thank God I'm not alone or I'd think I was crazy!

1 mom found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

How can you get bored if you are in and out. Like two minutes tops.

I don't think it is a matter of training just logistics.

My ex was a book kind of guy but then he was sooo stupid he would just be like oh, it is eight, I will take a book and wait and see. There would be times when he was in there for an hour and nothing happened. Pointless really, I mean you use the bathroom to go to the bathroom. Are there people out there that actually cannot tell it is time? I mean I attributed my ex's issues to his idiocy perhaps he just couldn't tell. :p

1 mom found this helpful

M.B.

answers from Beaumont on

I'm an avid reader but have never been in the bathroom long enough to read anything much. Are you by any chance constipated? Maybe try some Fiber Smart. It is not good to sit there and strain.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

ha! so yes sometimes I am pretty quick but it can be the only way for some me time so I take advantage. mags, books, texts, computer. you name it.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

It doesn't usually take me 20 minutes (or even close to that), so I don't typically read. My stepson gives birth every time he goes, but he is chronically constipated and it does usually take anywhere from 10-30 mins. He does take a book in with him.

1 mom found this helpful

G.T.

answers from Redding on

The only time I read something is when I'm constipated and having a hard time going, reading sort of distracts you from any discomfort. Other than that I don't usually go sit on the pot till I know I'm ready to go, and I'm usually there for less than a minute so there is no time for reading.
My ex used to read the paper on the pot and be there for a half hour sometimes.... P.U.
My current husband just sits there twiddling his thumbs while he goes.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I'm off to Target to buy Clorox wipes for my mouse. Eeeew.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

In and out, no playing, no reading. My boss always takes some type of reading material with him. If we are both headed to the mens/ladies room he will stop and talk to me and then I catch the reading material and then I start thinking oh gross. Just not really anything I want to think about with the boss.

1 mom found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

My man brings the tablet in there when he gets home from work - but I think it's more of a hiding tool than anything else.
I tend to get in get it done and get out, but if I am having a "difficult" day then I may bring something in there with me like a magazine or book.

I had a boyfriend that HAD to have something with him to the point that he carried a pocket dictionary with him!

1 mom found this helpful
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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Used to not take things in to read...until I got a Smartphone...

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Laredo on

I read this question on the toilet using my phone. :)

1 mom found this helpful
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A.A.

answers from Tulsa on

LOL, I totally read the shampoo bottles, soap boxes, anything with words! Glad I'm not the only weirdo :)

1 mom found this helpful
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K.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

Before my smart phone, i used to play hand held yahtzee ... But if I don't' have anything, I'll generally find anything to read. I also don't like to just sit there and dry my hair, I now bring in my laptop or read the paper. :)

1 mom found this helpful
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J.T.

answers from College Station on

Depends on what I have to do... I will text, read (magazines or books), play games on my phone or iPod.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.V.

answers from Los Angeles on

I usually just like to get in and get out. I'll take my iPhone sometimes and text someone or read an email if I know it might be a long one, or put the phone on speaker on the counter if I'm talking to my mom or sister and I suddenly have to go bad! Lol but we're close like that haha!
I cannot imagine staying in there longer than necessary just to read something, I don't consider it at all a time for relaxation Lol.
I would also never bring a drink in or leave my toothbrush out while I go because I heard once that microscopic pooh particles can float into the air and land on things you put your mouth on. Gross! Don't know if it's really true but I still wouldn't do it. It just grosses me out.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.P.

answers from Green Bay on

When I was younger, I used to suffer from IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). There were times when I was on the toilet for quite a while, and I too, would read everything in sight - I remember reading shampoo bottles too! :-)

Now, being an adult, I keep my bathrooms well stocked with magazines. I usually grab my ipod touch on the way too :-) My bowels just don't work like "clockwork" so sometimes I need to just sit and relax for a bit before things make their way out! LOL - sorry, TMI?? :-D

1 mom found this helpful

I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

This is a question for people on a low fiber diet. But that said, I count when I pee. I think its a mild case of OCD, but maybe its just something to do. It just so happens that the house we live in has a built in shelf in reach of the toilet. I put books there because I have not bought bookshelves for this house yet. I have picked up the same book thats been dog eared for a year on the same page and reread the same paragraph more times than I'd like to know.

1 mom found this helpful
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