Non Sleeping 10 Week Old

I have a suggestion and you may think I'm nuts. I began taking my children to a chiropractor when they were 10 weeks old. They have yet to have ear infections, colic, sleeping problems, etc. If you consider this option, my chiropractor who I love and is great with children is Duerke Warren at Mountain Health in Plano at the corner of Alma and Parker ###-###-####). If nothing else, call and discuss the issue with him. Good luck!

I have a 15 month old son, who also required swaddling until he was about 5 or 6 months old. We had to wean him off of it one limb at a time. BUT, he slept well and was a happier baby because of it. You'll be a happier mom if he's napping better. You next baby probably won't want to be swaddled from day one. Until then, do what works!

Hi K.,

In reference to the sleeping, you can try this: wear a shirt for a couple of days and make sure that it has your scent (do not wash it). Then try to put your baby to sleep as you normally do but when you lay her down on the crib put the worn shirt next to her so that she can get your scent. This way she will think that you are still holding her. Make sure that you place the shirt in a way that it won't put her in any danger. I did this with my son (now 19months old)and my mom did it with my brothers and it worked.

About the gas: the best solution is Mylecon Drops. They will break up some of the gas in the tummy and the rest usually comes out as a burp or as a fart. I used this with my son since he suffered from gas as well. The doctor told me that it won't harm the baby. Still to this day I use it in the rare occasions that he has gas pain. Hope this helps.

Good Luck!

K.,

Relax...that's the best advice I can offer. Our first daughter is now 8 months old and I can see myself in your email. We read all the books and were really worried about her sleeping habits. She never really napped more than 30 minutes at a time and really only napped about 3 times a day. As I said, she's 8 months old and has just now started napping about an hour 2 -3 times a day. The books give averages and every baby is so different it's really hard to compare yours to an average. Just take your cues from your baby, work your schedule around that. We still did the babywise plan, but she only napped for a half hour per cycle. I would suggest really trying to learn the cues she gives when she starts to get tired and help her get to sleep then. Don't force it. Also, however she sleeps best, let her. We had our daughter napping in the swing for a while cause it seemed to work best. She now sleeps through the night and naps in her crib. I hope this helps. Just try not to force her into a pattern that doesn't work for her. You and your family will be much happier...Good luck, don't stress and enjoy this time! They get big, so fast!! And she's going to be fine...

I agree with everyone - swaddle.

Besides swaddle make sure you are looking for all the signs of when your baby is sleepy - rubbing eyes, yawning, etc. Sometimes when they're over tired babies are actually harder to get down for a nap. The first sign try to get him down.

I really liked the BabyWhisper Book, and with her method helped all three of my kids sleep through the night and 3 solid naps (longer than 45). She belives in the EASY method where you fed the baby, have a little activity, and the first sign of being tired lay them down so you can have YOU time. Now for someone that is only 10 weeks only that time of activity can vary but normally my kiddo's only lasted 30 to 45 minutes, and then it was off to snooze land.

Being a mom is tough - hang in there, I promise things will get easier. I always say if you can get through the first 3 months of a babies life where they require so much of your time, you will get through the rest.

Good luck.
C.

I can maybe help alittle bit. My son (4 mths) had a lot of gas when he was that young and we gave him the Mylocon (spelling?) drops. They work within about 30 seconds! That is the only thing we ever found to work for gas, our pediatrician said to give it to him before he ate so that it would prevent it but not to do it at every feeding (depending on how frequent your feedings are) What we did for the sleeping was at 3 wks got him into a routine at night of bath, bottle, bed - everynight at the same time. If you bathe them that frequent though you need to rub lotion all over their body to keep their skin moist. We use the bedtime bath and lotion that is supposed to soothe them to sleep and it seems to work well. We are still on that routine now. Mine never took naps well and now he only sleeps about 45mins to an hour twice a day (which just recently started maybe 1 mth ago) He is not cranky so that is prob enough sleep for him right now. He sleeps through the night from about 8:30pm-9am unless I wake him up earlier and he has done that since he was about 8 weeks old. We never swaddled him, just layed a blanket over him and tucked in the sides to make him feel secure. Sometimes he cries when I lay him down but only for maybe 5 mins then he goes right to sleep. They kinda have to learn how to soothe themselves and they figure it out pretty quick. I was told to let him cry as long as I knew nothing else was wrong with him like a dirty diaper or hunger or even pain. But not to let him cry longer than 15 mins with out picking him up and soothing him. Putting him in his own room and own bed really helped us to get him to sleep and the naps in his crib took a bit longer but now they are okay as long as the room is dark. Hope some of this info helps but every baby is different. If you have any questions you can contact me and I will try my best to answer them . Good luck to you...It will get better with time, and yours may be a little colicy (mine was but not bad) and there is nothing you can do for that....it goes away by about 3 mths though. I was also told you can not spoil your baby until they reach about 5-6mths old. So hold them as much as you want right now!!!! Enjoy them--they grow up quick.

If she is sleeping ok at night and wanting to be held for her naps this might be behavioral. You will have to train her to sleep during the day. I did this with my son by letting him cry. It is SO PAINFUL I know, but the worst day is the first, then they just cry for a minute and go to sleep. I used a variating of the Ferber method for naps and it works. You are doing a great job, she just needs a little help with sleeping. Good luck! I know how tough it is. I have a 1 year old and a 2 year old.

Hi, well your baby sounds a lot like mine when he was about the same age. At first I had started out nursing only and due to my not producing enough milk I had to switch to breast milk and formula (similac)to supplement. Before and after, he had A LOT of gas. I then tried eliminating dairy from my diet since my older son had a milk allergy as an infant as well. After speaking to his pediatrician about the gas continuing and still not sleeping regularly, and after trying Mylicon drops for babies, we tried switching to a soy based formula with still no relief for his colic (gas) and still not taking regular naps. Finally after about 3 months, we had had enough and his pediatrician thought there was a possibility he may have a milk protein allergy. He took a sample of his stool, and put some drops on it. The drops turned blue, which meant there was a presence of blood in his stool. His pediatrician recommended we try Nutramigen (which is very expensive by the way). Well, it worked. Finally, he rested. We rested. Some people refer to it as "liquid gold" because it is so pricey but it made such a huge difference for him. Hopefully your baby does not have any allergies, but if so, this may be something to look into.

Also, my older son was able to tolerate the soy formula but his allergy symptoms were different. He had started wheezing slightly and had a very slightly raised rash all over his chest almost like a heat rash.

I hope this helps

You're probably not going to like my response...my daughter never took naps until she was about 6 months--I know sounds strange. And, she cried all day and was very difficult to put to sleep. We kept taking her to the doctor to find out was wrong. She said that some babies are just over stimulated. And she also said the crying would stop around 4 or 5 months. Almost 5 months to the day, she stopped crying and began behaving more "normally". Remember that what you read in the books are just guides--every baby is different. best wishes.

Hi K.!

Been there, and I am so sorry. At 10 weeks, there really isn't much to be done, but you're not far. Make sure that when she awake, she is alert and somewhat active(tummy time), she may not be getting enough stimulation when she is awake. Also, have someone else watch the baby for a couple of hours so you can rest (pump some milk for them).
Your patience will be better and you really will feel like a new person. As she gets older it gets easier, the ferber method sounds cruel but trust me it works, only you can't start that until she is older. Last resort, turn on the vaacuum cleaner, or dishwasher or something that makes a lot of noise and see if that might do it, I used to put my daughter in her car seat on top of the dryer, worker like a charm for a few weeks. Hope this helps!

Hi again K.!

OK, so she's probably not getting teeth yet, as I suggested before! :-) I also swaddled my son...until 4 months old! I have never heard of the "8hr per day" rule that you speak of. I swaddled him at every nap during the day and at night. It wasn't until he was 4 months old that I attempted to get him used to sleeping un-swaddled. So, I'm wondering...maybe she is missing the comfort of being swaddled during the day for her naps?

I went by Harvey Karp's book "Happiest Baby On The Block", and he claims that in the first 3 months, babies just love to be swaddled....which is why she will sleep so well in your arms.

If there's anything that I've learned as a mother of 2 (5yrs and 18mo), it's that there's no true "rules" for keeping your baby happy and comfortable. Just go with what works for your little one, and don't worry about what everyone else says!

:-) H.

K. -

Oh, that DOES make a difference! 10 WEEKS old - now I am convinced it is you not your baby....you need a break, honey. Your baby gets the sleep she needs, trust me - they are hard-wired to do that. You, however, are hard-wired to tend to her every need, and a 20 minute nap for you does nothing.

When my son was that young, and I really, really, needed a good hour nap or so, I would climb into our big recliner and get real comfy and cradle him on my chest. We both fell asleep super quick, and he slept longer. And I felt better. So knowing that, I would say you really need to find someone who can come to your house a few days a week and just be with your baby while you take a nap. I know, you will feel massive mommy guilt about doing this, but you need it, trust me. And your baby will never know about it.

You never mentioned if there is a father in the picture, and if so, maybe he can help you out here - but if not, then maybe you can find another stay at home mom in your neighborhood that will "trade" you time.

Whatever you do, just make sure you take care of YOU.

Good luck -

S.

K.,

I have not seen any advice saying it's bad or dangerous to swaddle more than 8 hours. I have a 7-month old that was not sleeping well at night or taking naps (she has a lot of allergies & eczema). I had a babysitter who swaddled her and it calmed her right down. She was waking herself up by kicking her legs during the night and scratching her face & head (allergies). I now swaddle her at night and during her daytime naps. She's gone from taking a few 15 minute naps in the car to taking 1+ hour naps during the day. Even at 7-months, if I don't swaddle her, her naps are much shorter.

Please let me know if you have a source of information indicating that I'm doing something bad for her if I'm swaddling during the day.

Thanks,
T.

Hi K.,
I used the suggestions from "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp. We found it on DVD--I think from Blockbuster Online---it really empowered us---especially my husband who was afraid he would not know what to do.

I haven't heard to only swaddle a baby for 8 hours a day...I swaddle mine everytime they napped and they are fine---if it works....do it.

Hang in there, but if you can find the DVD it is worth it!!! We are actually having to revisit his suggestions to---we have a three week old and she is definitely different from our now 14 month old---who was SO easy. Good luck and treasure that lil' one.

K.,

I have a 4mo little girl who didn't nap well at 10 weeks either. My breastfeeding didn't work out and we had to put her on formula at 5 weeks and it took several weeks to find one she could tolerate and she had LOTS of gas during that time. I thought that she wasn't napping well because I held her too much during her colicky phase and/or because she was still having gas and/or because I was failing at being a good mom (I know how you feel!). Plus, I was sooo tired, I just wanted her to get some rest so that I could, too.

Around 8 weeks old (she was still very colicky) I had started laying her on my chest on her her stomach (it was the only position that seemed to bring her relief) and letting her nap there for a while. She would still only nap about 30-45 min at a time, but at least she was getting some sleep

I worried about coddling her and my husband told me he thought I was spoiling her, but I swaddled and held and rocked and sang anyway.

The good news is that she finally started napping better at about 11 weeks (you're almost there!), but she still needed to be swaddled for a good nap then. I didn't hear about the 8 hour rule, so I still swaddled anytime she seemed to need it (her little arms would just flail and wake her up if she wasn't tightly swaddled).

At about 11.5 or 12 weeks, she started sleeping through the night (about 10 hours at a stretch) - tightly swaddled.

She's now 17 weeks and she naps during the day without being swaddled (sometimes in the swing). We still swaddle her at night, but not as snugly and sometimes with an arm out.

I would rock her during the day and let her fall asleep in my arms (even though they say you shouldn't) because it was the only way I could get her to go to sleep. And, I can put her down now while she's still awake and she will fall asleep. I had to slowly transition her to that over the past couple of weeks, but it went fine... I just kept putting her down sooner and sooner after picking her up to rock her until I would pick her up, put in my arms as if to rock her and then gently lay her down.

I know how tired you are now and how hard this is, but it does get better! I agree with the other mom that said the most important thing is that she get some sleep right now - not how she gets it. You can work with her on the how later.

Hope that helps. Hang in there!

P.

I am not an expert, but we experienced some of the same problems that you have mentioned when my daughter was around that age. I was nursing and she was having gas, so are peditrician sent us to a gastronolgist for her. That didn't find anything really wrong, but did suggest that we give a dose of mylicon before everytime that you nursed her, do this for a week. Too much doesn't hurt them. It really did help with the gas. Also you can put a small pillow under her mattress to elevate her bed a little. Also, I read somewhere that a baby sleep cycle should be about 90 minutes, and I noticed that she was start making noise after 45 minutes and I was going to get her. But, I left her alone after the 45 minutes and she began to fall back asleep. Hope that any of this helps. They say you have to do something 3 days in a row for it to become a routine. My daughter is 16 months old now, and takes 2 naps so there is hope.

Our son was like this as well. My pediatrician told me to hold him while he took naps during the day. When he told me that I about pulled my hair out. I worried that he would get use to this and not sleep on his own or in his crib. I can tell you that I followed his advice and it worked. My son eventually was able to sleep on his own in his crib longet than 30 minutes. I know it sounds terrible and to be honest there were times I cried while I held him because I felt I never got a chance to relax. It really did get better and the more they sleep the happier you are. I hope this helps you. Take care.

My advice is swaddle swaddle swaddle during the day. I have a 23-month old and an almost 5-month old and I think we stopped swaddling my younger daughter like a month ago. My older daughter didn't care about being swaddled really but my baby sure does. Babies are just different from each other. Sleep is the #1 most important thing here--not how it's accomplished. I was a book reader too and consequently felt like the world's worst failing mother because my younger daughter takes her naps in a swing (again, she's almost five months old and is almost too heavy for the swing). Bottomline: you do what works. Your sweet baby girl still is going to get into a good college if you swaddle her during the day. Promise. Oh and The Miracle Blanket is the best thing in the world for swaddling/sleep if you don't have one already.

My baby hated swaddling. He would kick himself out of it no matter who swaddled him and how tight. BUT he loved to sleep in a somewhat upright / inclined position in a hammock bed (www.AmbyBaby.com). The doctor also recommended putting some towels under the mattress or bedsheet to get his head /upper body a bit higher. It turned out he had reflux and also didn't get enough food. I didn't have enough milk and should have given him formula much earlier. After he started getting solid food our lives got a lot easier and even easier when he started walking.

I've been a childcare provider for over 20 years and have raised two daughters of my own. Also have 4 grandchildren. I have two suggestions for you.

First try folding a thick comforter or quilt into fourths and lay it on the floor to make a pallet. Let your baby spend the day on the pallet...you sitting by her side to do things for her. Give her lots of tummy time. You may find that she will sleep better on her tummy with someone watching over her during the daytime. You can pat her back if she's on her tummy or rub her tummy if she is on her back. Don't swaddle her. Let her stretch out. This is the way I do my infants until they are 5 or 6 months old. Then I transition them to naps in separate portacribs with a radio playing softly in the room.

Second. If the above suggestion doesn't work....it's time for cereal...no matter what the pediatrican says about it. As young as your baby is, I'd mix it with breast milk (6 ounces) to 2 ounces (pour dry rice cereal...no fruit combinations....into the bottle first and fill to the 2 ounce line). Mix it well...be sure it's nice and warm and enlarge the nipple slightly. Be sure the baby can get the mixture out of the bottle by sucking normally. Start with a morning feeding and see how it works. Just be sure to give it to her at a feeding just before you want her to sleep. If she's still not sleeping....then do it again in the afternoon. Babies have done well for generations having cereal before the age of 4 months of age.

Good luck and God Bless.

My son generally napped in my arms, in his swing, in his carrier, or just on the floor on a blanket until he was about 3-4 months old. For some reason, babies have a hard time sleeping in their cribs without being swaddled because they feel out of control. Don't hesitate to let your baby nap wherever they are comfortable (i.e. swing, bouncy chair, etc.) In a few more weeks the crib won't seem so daunting. Babies that young sleep differently than adults, so they can get into a deep sleep anywhere. Soon, that won't be the case, so take advantage while you can. My son is 10 months old now, and he can't nap anywhere but his crib. That is nice when we are home, but when we are out of town or out around town, we sometimes wish the stroller would lull him to sleep like it used to. You are doing just fine.

hello, K.,
my experience tells me the following:
gripe water will help to relief the gas. we tried mylicon drops and everything else, only gripe water helps. You can get it in Sprouts Farmers Market. Also, maybe she has some problems digesting dairy products because your baby's digest system is not fully matured. So try lactose free formula, if you also give formula in addition to breastmilk.
One of the reason that your baby can't nap longer is that her wakeup time is too long. 10-week baby should be put to nap within 1 hour or so. And she may need 3 naps during the day. My boy is now almost 22 months old. We read a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth and use the method since he is 4 months old and it turns out great results. He has a better sleep habits and longer and continued sleep. It also helps me a lot. So this is what I recommend to read. Or if you have any concern in executing the methods, welcome to email me. Hope it works.

Hi K.
First of all, so sorry about this. I can relate to lack of sleep! The only thing i can think of that would do this is Caffeine. Have you omited this? I'm sure you have since you omited spicy foods, but i thought i'd check. I did this with my first and couldn't figure out why she wouldn't sleep! :)
J.
good luck