Non-religious 'Baptism' Ideas

I think a backyard ceremony with your friends and family would be nice. I'm thinking more of a baby dedication. We go to a non denominational church and have baby dedications a few times a year. Granted this is "religion" based but you could do the same idea without any church affiliation. You and your husband could write something for the pastor to read. Something about how you promise to raise your child in a home filled with love and guidance. With a good attitude and a strong marriage.

I think it is nice of you to want to do something for your families. Have fun.

I don't really see the point, to be honest. Unless you are part of a religion that believes that un-baptized babies go to hell/limbo/whatever unpleasant place, why bother? My husband and I are also not religious and we agreed to let the kids decide what they wanted to do when they got old enough to have an opinion. Young adults and adults get baptized all the time, and it is probably more meaningful since they actually have a say in it. I'd ignore the grandparents - they'll find plenty of other things to pressure you about if you give in on this. Just my opinion...

I believe that baptism is a choice made by the person being baptized.
If you don't truly believe in what you are doing you are only lying to yourselves and everyone involved.

Don't have it and tell everyone that you respect their opinions but you are raising your child the way you see.

Baptism is not just a Catholic thing. If you want to baptize your baby - then do it - just as you would like to. It is your choice.

I was raised Catholic and my husband was not. I have not been a "practicing Catholic" in about 15 years. I do however, attend a non-denominational church. Their belief is that you have to make the choice to be baptized - and children (infants) can be dedicated, not baptized.

I would also say - don't do it becuase you are pressured from your family - do it if it is what you believe and want for your child.

All the best ~ J.

If you are not religious, why baptize? People do this because they believe the child needs it for some reason, if you do not believe this than I would skip it, and tell your parents that if the child decides when he is older to want to be baptized into a specific religion, you will support him, but that you are leaving it to him. My Step father wanted my children baptized (he is catholic), but we choose to do a Wiccaning, and although it was not what he wanted for our children, they are OUR children, not his, and we had to do what was right for our family.

Any non-Catholic church would be happy to "dedicate" your child. Some churches require you to be a part of their community (in other words, you can't just walk in off the street), but apart from that, there are no "rules". Only Catholicism has such stringent rules attached to it.
Our church will "dedicate" a child, meaning that your child has the ability to decide for him/herself when older if they would like to pursue that life with god. It's much less formal than a Catholic ceremony.

I would ask the pastor who married you if he would be willing to do a dedication, although I *think* that you might still have to do it in the church.

We had our child "blessed." I was raised Catholic and my husband was raised without any religion. I was sad to give up the idea of baptizing my baby, but there was no way my husband was going to agree. So we had a beautiful ceremony where a minister took a flower and blessed our child, naming body parts and touching it with the flower (bless your eyes that you will see the beauty in the world, stuff like that). It was wonderful, and I highly recommend it.

I would encourage you and your husband to learn more about what baptism is. In the Catholic Faith baptism is an sacrament of introduction into the Faith. It removes the stain of original sin and showers down on that child sacramental grace that strengthens that child in his or her faith. To a Catholic it is one of the most important days of that child's life.

The point of a Baptism is to introduce a child into the Catholic religion and is not simply a ceremony that should be taken lightly, unfortunately many feel that this is simply one more step that MUST be made. If you and your husband are not going to teach him or be consistant with the whole concept of introducing your child, and teaching him the religion, and attending church (mass) - then don't go along with the request of your family. Afterall, this is your child and this is your decision - once your son grows up he can decide what he wants to do and what he wants to follow. The best- Happy Mother of Five

My church had a "welcoming" ceremony - welcoming the child into the world - I thought it was a wondeful idea. How about a "welcoming" party at your house?

Baptizing or dedicating a baby mean that you are agreeing to raise the baby a certain way. If you don't go to church, then you can't agree to raise the baby in the way that a baptism or a dedication require you to do. If it's not important to you, the parents, then don't do it. It's not something that should be taken lightly. If you want to have a party to welcome your baby to the family, then go ahead. As a former Catholic and a very active person in my non-denominational church, I don't think it's appropriate for you to have a baptism or a dedication. It's difficult to have a religious ceremony with out the religion.
So, invite everyone over to meet the baby, but don't make it a religious thing.

What would be the purpose of "baptizing" a baby when you find no meaning in it? My family attends a non-denominational church and we just had a ceremony for all the babies and young children called a dedication ceremony where we acknowledge our desire to dedicate ourselves (the parents) to raising our children to know God and encourage a personal relationship with Him. Unless you have a "goal" or some purpose behind the act of "baptizing" a baby, don't bother.

We had something similar. We went to a lake for a family picnic with all the close relatives from both families. Our non-denominational pastor said a few words blessing the child and poured lake water from a pottery bowl, bought by her aunt, which the child could keep.

Everyone formed a circle around her (almost 2 years old) and each person (who wanted to) made a "wish" for what we hoped for her in the future. The comments were very original. While the adults wished for health, happiness, strength, intelligence, a good work ethic etc. the kids wished for a bicycle for her It was quite touching and quite a few people had tears in their eyes. It was a happy occasion for everyone.

I am sorry but I just do not understand why even having a seremony at all. Since baby baptism is not in the Bible, and is just a Catholic tradition, at our non-den. church we do baby dedications. It had a HUGE meaning to us. I can not imagine doing something so personal because of somebody's wishes to have it just because of the traditions..... Parents will "push" a lot of things considering grandkids, but IMO this is just way to personal to let them have their way.

Naming Ceremony.

You could also call it a blessing if you like.

Do what is right for the two of you and your children.

To Mary S., what a beautifulanswer! And I agree, God does not care which denomination you employ, He will be pleased you are ceremoniously welcoming in your son, His son, to the faithful community! It will not matter which denomination the gifts are from, we all have the same God! Congratulations!

As many others have said, skip the baptism and do something along the lines of a baby dedication/celebration of life ceremony with your non-denominational pastor. Have you asked that pastor what would be appropriate for your situation? Before I became a SAHM, I was a Presbyterian Youth Director and Christian Educator. Over the course of 11 years, I also worked for Methodist and Lutheran churches, and all 3 of those denominations baptize infants. The infant baptism ceremony in those denominations denotes the parents plan to raise the child as a Christian in the church, and the congregation's commitment to assist in raising the child in the Christian faith. When the child is older, s/he makes the choice to go through Confirmation class to confirm their desire to become a member of that denomination. Some people (including a lot of older catholic folks) believe in infant baptism because they think the child's soul will go to hell if they die before they are baptized. You and your husband clearly aren't in this category.

Our 5-year old was baptized in the Presbyterian church I worked in when he was born. Our 17-month old daughter is not baptized because we have not been active in a church over the past few years since we moved up north (hubby is in the Air Force). People think it's weird that I've worked in churches, graduated from seminary, and have a kid that isn't baptized. It isn't appropriate for us to just go out and find someplace for her to be baptized, and many pastors aren't going to baptize just for the sake of baptizing if you aren't a member of their church because that misses part of the point of baptism, which is to be brought up in the fellowship of Christians in a church setting. So please don't let the pressure you feel from anyone sway your decision. Like I said, talk to the pastor who married you and find our what s/he says. Good luck and if you want to chat further privately, please feel free to message me.

Baptism can happen at any age, and, in my opinion, should be chosen by the person being baptised. Hence, in our family, a person cannot be baptised until they understand and can give consent (usually around the age of 12 or 13).

If you are unsure that having this type of ceremony is right for you, your child and your husband, PLEASE don't do it just to make your in-laws happy.

As others have suggested, consider doing a simple dedication ceremony. You can dedicate your child to God and to your family pledging that all family members will encourage the raising of your child in a Christian manner. Perhaps name two special people to be the people who would make sure that your child continues with his Christian upbringing should something happen to you and your husband.

Good luck :)

Don't do it just because you're feeling pressure from family. I have three children none of which were baptized because my church (Evangelical Free) does not baptize infants. We do a baby dedication because a baptism is a sign that you have chosen to follow Christ - a baby can't make that decision. My parents don't get it but I didn't let them pressure me into going to their church and having them baptized. Just tell your family that until you make a decision to start attending a church that you do not feel like it's right or necessary to have your child baptized. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Hi, R.:

You could have a baby naming ceremony by your pastor.

Do you all attend the church of the pastor you are asking for assistance
from?

Look for a church in your area from the web site

www.nsac.org

Hope this helps. Good luck.
D.

After reading your questions and some of the responses, I tihnk it's important to differentiate between religion and faith. You mention that neither you and your husband are involved in the churches where you were raised. You also mention that you were married by a pastor. This makes me wonder about your faith in God, Christ, etc. I'm not suggesting that you need to share that on this website, but that you use that to guide your choices for your son. This ceremony would be only the first of many choices to come...
- how to talk to him about God and your beliefs
- whether to teach him to pray (and how)
- how else you will incorporate your spiritual lives into your daily lives
If you have the answers to all or some of these, I think it's important to keep the ceremony consistent with that, e.g. to dedicate him to Christ, to God or simply to welcome him to a loving and spiritual family. It's a very personal choice and one that needs to be fitting to your immediate family (moreso than the extended family), particularly if you think you may have more children in the future (when your son could be old enough to start questioning any inconsistencies). The only other piece of advice I'd offer is: once you make your decision, be firm in your beliefs. Don't second guess yourself, as he will only remember what you choose to tell him when he's older :)

I wouldn't fool with it unless you're just DYING to! As much as I loved the idea of a christening gown and photo ops -we're not religious (we do now attend a Unitarian church that has a commitment/name ceremony for children), so we didn't do anything. I'm sure our parents would have loved it, but it wouldn't have been an honest representation for what we feel and believe.

Catholics are one of only a few sorts of christianity which require your marriage to be recognized by the church to perform a baptism. Most churches recognize ALL marriage as valid, regardless of who performed it and how, or even if "god" had anything to do with it! Baptism is different though, since it is really something that is ONLY done for religious reasons. If the grandparents are pressuring you to baptize your children, it's not just that, but they're pressuring you to be more religious than it sounds like you are. I think the best approach is to sit down and talk to them about it, not just do something to make them happy now, but that will probably leave them expecting a more religious upbringing than you intend to give!

I think maybe I am not understanding, baptism is a christian religion practice - a public display of faith and accepting your savior. If you don't want it to be religious, I wouldn't do a baptism...

I am currently going through the same dilemma and to not deal with the guilt and bad mouthing we are going to have a christening. My husband and I are both not religious. I was born catholic he was born christian. We will not be attending church after we do this, I find it pointless. My husband doesn't have a backbone and I just can't deal with the fighting over it so they win.

Going with a couple other moms here. The sacrament of Baptism should be researched by you and your husband. If you are not church-going people who live a life of faith then you should NOT baptize your child.
In our church, the parents are asked during the baptism if you will serve as an example of the faith by the lives you lead and by being active in the church. At this moment in time, you cannot answer "yes" to those questions. Baptize the children or let them decide when they are baptized at a point they are ready to follow Christ. Do not let your family pressure you.
The thought of a "non-religious baptism" is an oxymoron.

i'm in the same situation, except i want to have my child dedicated to God and his Will. I was raised Baptist and so was my childs father. But neither of us practice a "specific religon" nor do we go to church. But we beleive in God. We are going to have an out door dedication ceremony with family and friends to promise to God to raise our child according to his word and to do whats right. We are not haveing her christend or baptized. The Non-Denominational Pastor will simply annoint her head with oil and we'll say some prayers, sing some songs, and eat some food! hope this helps you and anyone else.