NO Will Power to Lose Weight Just Keep Gaining

Updated on September 22, 2009
S.D. asks from Topeka, KS
16 answers

I thought for sure this was going to be it I would stay a size 8-9 and get smaller and under 140 lbs but nope it has crept up and now no jeans fit so I need a bigger size other than a 10.I have steered away from birthcontrol due to possible side effect of weight gain but now on Zoloft very low dose 25 mgs a day and needing to increase but asked if it casues weight gain and it is very possible that my added weight could be from Zoloft.Along with breastfeeding my 6 month old stress financial issues and my marriage not being happy my husband and I aren't on the same page anymore I can't speak to him I hate the way he speak's to me.So yes i'am on a rollercoaster but that's life.When is enough enough already and get up and do something about it.Mom's how did you start your journey to take better care of yourself so for you can live for tomorrow.

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S.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Good question. I don't have the answer but I would love to hear also what others have done. Weight Watchers has always worked for me in the past.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.M.

answers from Springfield on

HI S. , to lose my wieght I just started walking everyday and taking malti-vatimans and I have lose 65lbs and kept it off for 2 yrs now! I was 250 and now 185 so I'm happy now ,btw I eat what I want just smaller porations

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K.B.

answers from Wichita on

Good Morning S., I think you have a lot your dealing with right now and that could be one reason you seem to be gaining. Relationships, financial state, that roller coaster needs to level out a tad bit right?!?!?!

140 is not a bad thang in my mind dear heart, that is my weight right now and I am 58...lol Oldest kids is 35 next month, youngest is 32.
I have been through depression, take Effexor, started that about 8 years ago. Why can't you talk to your hubby right now or why does he speak disrespectfully to you?
Is he suffering stress and depression for your financial state also?
I went to my Dr. when I was just wanting to sit and do absolutley NOTHING, by stare off into space. She asked what was going on with me and after I finished my long list, she looked at me and said Hum you take care of everyone else BUT K. Who takes care of YOU?? I had to admit NO ONE.
Then I went home and had a long emotionally tiring talk with my hubby, of that time 30 + yrs. I met my hubby right before my Sophomore year in High school. We've been married 38 yrs.

Maybe you can sit down and ask What's happening with us honey. What can we do as a couple to pull us closer together and not let what ever is causing the rift to get wider. You have 3 blessings to think about and what the distance between you is or could possibly do to them also.
They can feel the tension too.
Go for a walk with the kids, in the evenings, push the baby in a stroller and just be outside for a while, listen to the sounds, look at the clouds, find things that make the kids giggle. Nothing cheers me up more then hearing our gr kids laughing.

It doesn't take will power to lose, it takes determination.
Get some Belly dancing DVDs or Salsa Dancing DVDs they are so much fun and they help tone & shape as you do the short work outs. The Kids will love the music and will probably want to dance right along with you.

If your older Blessing are in school take the baby and go to a Barnes & Noble or other relaxing place, sit and have a coffee or Tea and browse the books. Baby can be content in his stroller looking around at all the activity around him.

Relax your thoughts, your mind and body and enjoy what is and don't dwell on What If's. My Biggest What IF is thinking my life would be so much easier if our youngest son wasn't married to the Wicked Wit*h from H3ll. But I know that isn't the answer at all. Trying to get her to Rise Above Her Raising is what would help her so much.

Will be praying for you S., keep in touch if you need to vent ok!
God Bless you and Hang in there sweet heart.
K. Nana of 5

5 moms found this helpful

J.G.

answers from St. Louis on

If you are having problems with your husband I would recomend kick boxing. Burns a ton of calories and it is fun to imagine you are beating the stuffing out of him.

4 moms found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Holey moley sweetheart, the last thing on your mind right now should be your weight. Yes, I know that there are health implications, but having a six month old child is enough work on it's own! I remember when my first was six months - I was exhausted, but so in love with my child, it was worth it.

Sounds to me like you need to sit down with hubby and have a discussion. Get on a budget (Dave Ramsey is a great place to start) and see if you can't get on the same page. It may reduce some of the tension with him.

Take care of the home issues first. Find out WHY your husband is so unhappy. It may be simple things that he hasn't wanted to talk about. He's under pressure, too. (However, that is no excuse to be nasty to you!)

Get your family together and I'll bet you'll see the weight go away without even trying. Please keep us posted!

3 moms found this helpful
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E.F.

answers from St. Louis on

It sounds like life is happening to you! It sounds very familiar to me too - there are two tools that I used that really helped me.

First - for weight loss - I found a wonderful website called sparkpeople.com. It is a weight loss and fitness community - there are so many resources on this website, and the best part is it's all free! There are exercise videos, workout programs, meal plans, recipes, community and group support pages. I had baby no. 3 18 mos. ago and I was able to lose all of the baby weight in 6 months, just by following my own meal and fitness plan (30 pounds!) I still use the website on a daily basis to track to my nutrition and fitness levels.

Second - financially - Dave Ramsey! I saw another post mentioned him. He has two websites - daveramsey.com and mytotalmoneymakeover.com. He has a radio show, TV show on fox business, books. This guy is common sense, he tells it like it is and he makes it very simple for you to figure your way out of a mess. Being on the same page financially also was a huge help to my marriage, it just got rid of a lot of arguments and stress!!

Good luck to you - both these options are very affordable - you can listen to Dave for free on the radio or on his website, you can download podcasts, and his books are available at the library. You can watch his program on hulu.com as well. And I can't say enough about Sparkpeople!

3 moms found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Have you had a night out with your friends in a while? I find doing so brings back some happy energy for me, all the laughing, dancing and just having some good ol'fun can really help me when I get in a rut. If you are looking for someone to talk to, feel free to message me, we can then exchange info! I know once we have kids, we seem to structure all our time around them and don't have the big group of friends we used to. Also, if you are interested, I have a ton of wonderful salad and low cal recipes that are so easy to make if you are interested. These salads I would not even consider a salad they are so good! Anyway, I wish you lots and lots of luck! Take care!

3 moms found this helpful
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K.S.

answers from Columbia on

WOW, you are dealing with a lot right now!
On terms of the weight loss, I would suggest getting your faveroite music on an ipod/walkman/etc, putting your child in a stroller and going for a really long walk. I did this a lot with my son when he was that age (only 3 now). i would "have" to walk long enough so he could get a good enough nap in.
THe other benefit was it made me happy to get out of the house, get fresh air, and exercise!

3 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Joplin on

S.,

It is very difficult to lose weight with all that is going on with you and to have all the underlying issues. I know this from experience and my heart goes out to you! But maybe I can help some... I have access to a natural product (in tablet form) that is for people who are tired, stressed, or depressed. Only way I can describe it as my "happy" pill. It is all natural. It does not have caffeine or sugar in it so there is not this "high" or "buzz" to it. And it does not make all your problems go away, but in my case it just helps me deal with things better and think more clearly. It has totally changed my life! I hated getting up in the morning and facing the day. Now I am "up and at 'em" ready to attack the day and whatever it is I have to do. And I have sustaining energy throughout the day and no longer have to nap and rarely even think of a nap (which used to be a daily occurrence!) I would love to talk to you about it, if you want to learn more about it, let me know. My website is www.choose2bwell.com, look up Eleviv. Let me know if I can help you any further. God Bless! ~J.

2 moms found this helpful
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D.L.

answers from Wichita on

I wanted to reply relating to marriage difficulties. I would suggest renting a movie called Fireproof. It is excellent and shows how a man turned his marriage from divorce to reconciliation. I want to buy The Love Dare journal to work through because every marriage can be improved.

2 moms found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from Topeka on

S....forget the magic suits, the supplements, any of the other weight loss magic aids...the only thing that will disappear is your money!!!! I have been struggling with my weight for years now and I can tell you the only thing that works is to burn more calories than you take in!!! I can also tell you that the chief cause of all of the calories that you are consuming is more than likely all of the stress that you are dealing with right now. I am a "comfort eater" when my life is in turmoil ( which it is right now) I up the calorie intake and up goes the scale!!! I am on zoloft and just decided to go from 50 mg a day to 100, to see if taking the edge off of my nerves won't help me to control the eating.
Try to put the thought of your weight on the back burner right now, start working on some of the other things, and my first order of business would be your marriage. Do you still love your husband??? Do you want a good marriage with him??? Then one of you has to quit holding the other at arms length and start trying to work your way back together again. Have a quiet talk with him about what is bothering him and what is bothering you...no blame...no accusations...try to be calm and loving. Remember, you fell in love with him for a reason...get back to the basics!!!
After you get your life on a bit more of an even keel then you can start working on the weight.
In the meantime, take the baby for a walk in the evening ( take your husband with you...a nice quiet time to be together and talk), find a dance class to go to with your hubby...take your older children to a playground and have fun!!! Start with small things....one minute...one hour at a time...take back control...you can do this!!!
R. Ann

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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

No matter what you read, no matter what you say...your life will not change until YOU decide to change it.

But what will help is focusing your thoughts & actions toward positive elements in your life. Find the "happy" in your life, regardless of the turmoil you're facing, & that will help you focus toward the positive. I wish you Peace!

2 moms found this helpful
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T.C.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi, S.--

You need support, precious! Know that all that you are dealing with can take a turn for the better. If you focus on changing just one thing, you will start the momentum for movement in a more positive direction!

If you want to start with weight loss, I highly recommend a group called Cleanse With Friends--a meetup group in Kansas City. Here's the website: http://www.meetup.com/cleansewithfriends.

There's a group-supported cleanse with whole, natural foods that is amazing for jump starting weight loss and healthy eating. And, most everyone begins to make other positive changes in their life...it's that empowering!

Sending you a big hug,

T.

1 mom found this helpful

L.C.

answers from Kansas City on

dont worry about side effects! i am on depo shot and im on zoloft, both are apparently supposed to make you gain weight, but i have actually lost weight. so dont worry about that. being happier and more in control of your life is going to give you more motivation. Another thing that helps, and i know this sounds totally stupid, but watch the biggest loser. it gives you a LOT of motivation!

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V.A.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi S.,
Have you heard of the body magic? It's a weight loss garment that will drop you 2-3 sizes instantly and help you loss weight. I went from a 9/10 to a 6/7 in 2 weeks after wearing it daily!! It was featured on nbc, abc, fox news and other news channels and talk shows. I became a distributor after seeing what this garment does. Check out my website and let me know what you think. www.dropupto3sizesin10mins.com . Also look at the news clips on you tube. www.youtube.com/ardysslasvegas
Thanks,
V.
###-###-####

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S.W.

answers from St. Louis on

I keep saying if God would have made grapes and carrots to taste like chocolate or cheese cake we wouldn't have a problem!! I'm in the same boat, I'm in a 10 and would love to be an 8. I blamed in on having my kids (they are 8 & 6 now) but I recently say a picture of me when my oldest was abut a year and I was smaller than then I am now. I've started Weight Watchers on line and it's really helping me. I'm trying to get in the habit of excersizing at least 5 days a week. But that's hard with work and activities. I use to be the it I can't walk for an hour it's not worth it, now I've accepted that 1/2 an hour is fine and I just need to find something that I'll do. So I have an hour of me time each day, I walk or do a excersize video (mostly Leslie Sansones Walk Away the Pounds videos) and then a shower, I feel like a new person when I'm done. Remember to take little steps. Make a change a week. Add some excersize or change your snacks. We've done our whole household. One of the first little steps we took was potato chips. My kids don't even take them in their lunches, it's some form of veggie. Carrot stick, cucumber or bell peppers. what ever looks good when we go shopping.

I also think that you should check out the Dave Ramsey book, he also has a TV show, but I'm not sure when it's on.

Fire Proof would be a great movie for you to watch. And if you are not involved with a Church that will help too. Not only will it help to connect you with God, but also help to get you a support group. You get you a good support group and God in your life and it will help in all areas of your life. And pray, pray everyday for you and your needs, for your hubby to help him change his heart, for your kids and don't forget to thank God for what you do have. The health of your family, a roof over your head. Sometimes just stopping to think about what the good things we have will help.

Good Luck and God Bless!!

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