No Stranger Danger

Updated on August 18, 2008
K.S. asks from New Berlin, WI
4 answers

My son just turned one yesterday and I'm really nervous that he doesn't have stranger anxiety. Instead he either flirts with strangers or leaps at them. I do have a 2 year old that takes alot of time so I'm just worried that this is a sign of a relationship problem between the two of us. His doctor appointment is in a week and I plan to bring this up then but I can't help but feel incredibly guilty and embarrassed by this. Does anyone have any support for me?

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So What Happened?

Well, looks like I was too soon to judge. We tried a new church last night and our little guy screamed- most likely the whole time. As soon as I held him he was fine. Looks like we just have a different level of stranger danger. Thank you all for your help. I was definately able to relax.

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answers from Milwaukee on

K. - my only child, my daughter is 11 months today and she has no anxiety around strangers either! When I leave for work in the morning she does get sad and cry for me, even though she is with her dad all day. But she is over it quickly. Whether with me or her dad, she smiles and flirts with strangers in stores and restaurants. I am scared sometimes that a stranger will pick her up and carry her away without me even knowing, no matter how well I watch her! Actually, at the doctor's office she is the worst, flirting, singing and talking to the doctor while he is trying to talk to us!

I chalk it up to her being very laid back and also being confident that she is loved and I will always be there for her. Ever child is different, as I am sure you have experienced being on your second. Don't be sounds like you have done a great job showing your son most people are good. Maybe teaching caution instead of fear will be different, but easier to deal with than shyness?

Good luck ;)



answers from Milwaukee on

My son who is 25 months has also never had any stranger anxiety. There has only been two people that he has ever looked at and cried. Otherwise, he has no problem going up to people and saying "Hi!" I'm always a little nervous if I'm in public alone with him, because he is so outgoing, but people generally seem to be amused by how friendly he is. I've never been embarrassed by him until he stopped a free music concert by playing by the railing near the performer this last weekend. It sounds like your son is pretty similar to mine in temperament.


answers from Milwaukee on

My daughter who is 2 y/o on saturday and an only child did not have stranger anxiety until a few months ago (about 22 months). Now my daughter holds my hand and puts her other hand over her eyes when we are around people or a place other then home (even with people/places she knows). That only lasts a few mintues then she is her outgoing little self. Every child has a differant personality so I would not worry about it. Bring it up at your next docs visit to get some reassurance, that never hurts... plus we pay them enough that they can and should answer all our questions.



answers from Milwaukee on

My 15 month old has never had any stranger or separation anxiety either. I went through a stage where I was worried that I hadn't bonded well with her as a newborn (she also refused to breastfeed -- she stumped the lactation consultant, who couldn't figure out why she wouldn't nurse even though we tried every trick in the book for three months). I brought it up at our last doctor's appointment, and the pediatrician said that not every baby goes through that stage, and it's not something to worry about. My husband and I just joke that, to her, "strangers are just friends she hasn't met yet!"

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