No Sex Drive 2 Years Later

Happened to me too. I'm not taking any birth control so for me it has nothing to do with that at all. I spoke to my gyne and he said it's the number one complaint he gets from moms.

He said it's due to having kids and me taking on the bulk of the responsibility and chances are I'm frustrated with my husband and that my emotional needs aren't being met due to all the stress and frustration. He also stressed the importance of speaking up and letting my husband know I need more help from him and that we should make time for each other (go on dates - ha!... haven't done that in years).

How's your self esteem? Comfort with your body post baby? That may be something unconsiously affecting you. I know I'm less excited to show mine off with all the stretch marks and wrinkles after 2 kids. I just push through it, though.
Also as mentioned, if you're on hormonal contraceptives, that has a big impact as well.

You make no mention of how your husband is with you. Everything you mentioned revolves around the baby, birth and your body image. Sex begins in the mind. So begin to think about the things that turn you on and get you going. Get back in touch with your sexy self.

Yes our bodies change after babies and with age but it doesn't mean that our bodies are without appeal or attraction. My sexiness isn't on my husbands shoulders. I look at myself and learn to love every inch of me. Every wrinkly, roll, curve, stretch mark, pimple, gray hair, etc. part of me. Why not? I'm the only me I have. I don't have to be a flawless, airbrushed super model. I'm hot just the way I am and my husband does things that drives me wild. My job is to get him to do those things I love and I have many things that I love. So I'm always thinking about them and encouraging both of us to be intimate in every way.

I agree with the Posts!!!! Also are you taking any other meds???? Those can impact your drive as well.. How is your relationship been. Are you stressed out??..I work fulltime and have three small kids and all I can think about is sleep too LOL! However, when we make time for a date night or lock the bedroom door and have had some wine....It works wonders!!! Great way to reconnect with your spouse...

I agree with a lot of the posts, but I also heard you say that you get enough sleep & that your husband helps out around the house. I was in the same situation -- even being teased & called a nympho prior to kids. :) Here's something I learned through marriage counseling. Sometimes we'd struggle after our 2nd child, but sex would always be wonderful if we woke up having sex in the middle of the night. Our counselor said it was b/c my brain wasn't thinking about what task needed to be done next -- I was relaxed & not "working" in my brain. So I started paying attention to this, and it seems to be true! Try a relaxing bath, or your hubby rubbing your back after the kids go to bed. No hidden agenda -- just some loving/touching time together. You (not him) need to think about some fun sexual memories of your husband, and eventually (maybe a day later, maybe a week later) you'll start wanting that again! I promise -- just relax & tell him not to expect anything to come of your snuggle time. And then, surprise him when you're really ready! It'll be fun -- this is one way your married life changes, and you either need to focus & put some effort into it, or the struggle will turn to frustration. Choose the (fun) effort! :)

It's called having a kid, and being completely exhausted! When we do have some alone time, we are pooped and I am asleep in 15 minutes. Sex moves down to the bottom of the list- right behind sleep! lol
Seriously, are you on any kind of hormonal contraceptive? If so, that could the problem. Maybe talk to your doctor about switching...

Hormones are all over the place for women...it's no wonder that young moms lose their sex drive! There is a new supplement that balances hormones and metabolism. Bringing your body back into balance solves a lot of the tired...stressed...depressed...no libido feelings. It's pretty amazing what it does for people - and it's all natural. You can go to www.LifeAsItCouldBe.com/K./eleviv and check it out. When our body is balanced, we can feel good in every way! Great suggestions by other moms, too :)

On the opposite end of the spectrum, I had a hysterectomy after they found uterine cancer, and after that recovery awhile back I found I have just about no sex drive. But when I make myself - I do. And I find myself erhem, excited in the strangest places. So, I do not know how old you are, but I am assuming that you are not like me, mentalpausal age anyway, so I have a losing battle, but I would guess it might completely no interest, and since doc says everything is alright, that there might be some blocks like I have, too (*it's gonna hurt, ouch, I'm so tired, I'm so tired, it's gonna hurt,ick bladder infection, he should brush his teeth why didn't he take a shower, etc.) some of it is in my head but I can chalk it up to all these other things. So my point is do an experiment with yourself for awhile. And just have at it anyway for say six months. I will too., I am trying to cancel the voices, that's all. See if you have any of those. And although your body isn't roaring into wanting sex on its own, perhaps do some of the backup that used to make you feel sexy. champagne anyone?

You don't say how old you are - everyone is different and unfortunately loss of interest is normal for some. Yes....oh to be young and randy again! Sorry don't have any more insight than that. I do think some people over exaggerate their want for sex and how much they get "it" though. Quality not quantity maybe?

I also have no sex drive. I have 3 kids and my youngest is 2.5 year old. I dread getting in bed at night w/ my husband in fear he will start up with me sexually. My exhaustion is just too much. How am I supposed to have a sex drive when I take care of 3 young kids and am always tired??? I do give my husband sex at least once a week - sex usually happens over the weekend, or starts on Thurs. night, and even then, I am not in the mood, but I know I must give him sex, so I do out my wifely obligation. I guess what I'm saying is - even though you have no sex drive like me, just have sex anyway b/c you have to give your husband sex - otherwise, he (not just your husband - all men) will eventually stray if their wives don't give them any sex (that is my biggest fear). So just lay there once or twice a week and let him do his thing. Try some KY if you think that would help (and especially if you can't lubricate on your own). I feel your pain. Good luck!

I am the same way, and I think it's the pill. I'm going off of it next month to see if that makes a difference.

I feel your problem..i feel the same way and its been 2.5 years later....I personally dont like the way my body looks and the way i look so it makes it hard for me to get interested. I work full time and have 1 boy who keeps me on my toes, therefore when i try to work out he thinks he needs to help me. good luck!