"No-school Day" Care Decision

Updated on July 30, 2012
A.M. asks from Oskaloosa, KS
17 answers

hey mamas, this is one of those things that i am pretty sure i know the answer to, just could use some backup. my mom agrees too but i just asked my hubby and he looked at me like, "uuuuuuh...why are you asking me?" lol. NO HELP!

so my son has been in an AWESOME daycare/preschool for the last 2 1/2 years. this place is amazing. i can NOT say enough good things about it. it's a smaller "mom and pop" type place (not in a home, it's an actual daycare center). the ladies are all very sweet, the owner is very christian (but not in-your-face about it). they take the kids to the movies, swimming, and on field trips (every week during the summer) as well as planning great activities for the rest of the days. and to top it all off - they were the school with the lowest tuition of any in town. LOVE LOVE LOVE them. and my son has thrived there. he is doing a lot of things i NEVER thought he'd do in preschool - sounding out (reading) words, using phonics, spelling short words. of course he knows his colors and numbers to 100 and all of that jazz...

anyway, at the beginning of the summer she asked if we would be doing "no school days" with them. they charge $45 per day. all i had to do was pay the enrollment fee to hold his spot. at the time i didn't have it and she said kindly, "oh that's okay, ms. linda will always have a spot for (my son) if he needs it." and i was going to pay it later.

well now i enrolled him in kindergarten (SNIFF!!) and they have a lady from the YMCA come in before and after school to watch the kids. we jumped on this because i have no idea what else we'd do with him since we both work full time...anyway...they also do no-school days.

and i'm coming to the sad conclusion that our days at (his preschool) are numbered. like as in two weeks lol. it makes me so sad! i guess dealing with kindergarten was tough enough, i didn't expect to have to say goodbye to these wonderful ladies who have done SO great for my son, too.

but i do think that taking him back there randomly for just a day or two here and there, would probably be harder on him than just cutting ties completely. can i get a little support on this? thanks ladies! (if i'm wrong please let me know....like i said, just looking for some back up but if i'm missing something please point it out...)

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So What Happened?

thanks guys, you are awesome :) i guess it could go either way really. he is somewhat slow to warm up at times so probably, for him, a clean break is best. although it really broke my heart to talk to him about it today lol. but i felt he should have some advance warning. anyway thanks again - you guys are always so supportive!

Featured Answers


answers from Washington DC on

We used my sitter for no-school days once the older two were in school. The youngest was still with her, but we'd still contniue doing it if she had room. She has filled their spots and I completely understand that. No sense in saving spots for a few days a year.

But I think it would be good for him to go back to a place where he is comfortable and has fun. The other option is to find a babysitter that can come in on those days - for a more reasonable price maybe. My girls are happy with $50 per day, and I'm happy to pay it. I have awesome babysitters too. Now I know that rate is low for a day, but I also give them both plenty of paid time off - so it evens out in the end and we both know this :).

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Pittsburgh on

I agree...let him stay where he stays for before and after school care and just be thankful you had such a great place for his younger years!

2 moms found this helpful

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answers from Tulsa on

I don't see why you wouldn't use them for no school days. Your son does well there. I'm assuming you've talked to him about starting kindergarten, so he knows there are changes coming and he won't be going to this daycare every day. You can just add this in that on days he doesn't have school, he will get to go and visit for a day. My son uses a drop in daycare on weekends where I have to work overtime. It's very sporadic, but I always talk to him about it and he's always excited to go. He doesn't get upset if I don't take him. I think your son will do fine.

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answers from New York on

I would suggest staying with the YMCA plan for two reasons:
1. It's highly likely that his school buddies will be there on "no school" days.
2. After a period of time in school, he will likely find the daycare setting "babyish".

We transitioned my son from a home daycare into a preschool setting last fall because he was one of the oldest (mixed age group) and he was bored. He has mentioned to us more than once since that Miss Trudy's (where he was VERY happy and well loved) is for little kids!

Give a thoughtful gift and write a heart felt (typed) "thank you" letter that can "double" as a current parent reference and move on to "big boy" time!

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Kansas City on

You might keep your options open with the daycare. The Y-Care is not usually available on days that the only kids not in school are the Kindergarteners (Weds. of Parent Teacher Conference Week, etc.) Y-Care may also not be open during all of Winter Break or Spring Break, you'll need to check with your location.


3 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

It probably would be better for your son to move along. With kids, long, lingering partings just don't work.

But that doesn't mean YOU have to cut your ties. You can still have a wonderful friendship with these wonderful people. Tell them frankly how much you loved their program and tell them you want to support it going forward. You don't have to donate a million dollars -- just be their ambassador. Get the word out about how wonderful they are. Donate your son's outgrown toys to them. Ask around, you may be able to nominate them for an award. And ... just stay in touch. You can think of it as two graduations -- your son's graduating into grade school. They're graduating from being your daycare providers to being your friends.

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answers from Washington DC on

If the school provides care at the school, then I'd make the switch entirely. Keep things consistent for both of you.

Do give the preschool thank you gifts and let them know you are going to keep him at the school instead. I gave my DD's old daycare thank yous when we left - loved them, but couldn't afford the time or money to keep her there (far from home).

Before/after care for SD was very good. She walked to the multipurpose room at the end of the day, had a snack, did her homework, played with friends. She didn't have to worry about missing a bus or anything. When she was older, she even earned service hours (as required by our district) by helping out.

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answers from Chicago on

I like your plan but don't understand why going back once in awhile would be hard on him. People do different things all the time. I did the before and after school thing with my children but sometimes had others babysit and I don't see why this would be any different and it teaches your child to stay connected throughout a lifetime. I am going to go to my fourth grade school teacher's birthday party next week and I'm in my fifties! If you must completely cut your child off do so with a nice final good by and perhaps a note or gift. On the other hand I'd keep it flexible because you never know if there's an off day when the other program might have a glitch. Good luck!

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answers from Albany on

Aaaaw, I get the feeling they're only the first group of many awesome teachers/care providers you'll be sadly saying good-bye to.

I also think you'll likely be very pleased with the new arrangement as well since you're clearly a very pleasant, flexible agreeable person who makes the best of everything!

Furthermore, based on the apple and the tree theory, I'll bet your son will adjust quite nicely in kindergarten!


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answers from Pittsburgh on

Your son will have fun playing with his new school friends at the Y program. Just kindly let your current place know, so that she knows not to hold a spot for your son. Have your son make his teachers gifts for the last day - we did thank you cards, and I had my son tell me his favorite quality of each teacher to put on the cards - and say goodbye.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Columbus on

My first reaction would be that you're right, it may do more harm than good. Especially if he's having a hard time transitioning into the new class. If he's constantly wishing he were back, it might not be the right thing to do. Change is not a bad thing for kids. Learning new things and meeting new people keeps them evolving.
I would say that after your son has made some friends and is comfortable with his new class, it would be fine to go back and visit - but not for a whole day. Just visit.
Good luck to you. My little boy is starting Kindergarten this year too. *sniff*.

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answers from Springfield on

My 6 year old does best with clean breaks. He loved preschool, and they had a summer program he could have participated in the summer after he graduated, but I knew that that would actually make it harder for him to begin kindergarten at a new school in the fall. Now that he has gone to his new school for a year, he remembers his preschool and sees the things his brother and cousins do, but he understands better that he's too old.

Personally I would just stick with the program at the school. If he participates in the YMCA program, he'll get to know those kids and see them on the days there's no school. If the school is off on Friday, the leaders from teh YMCA will likely be talking to the kids throughout the week about the fun things planned for that day off.

I just know that would be best for my son. He thrives on consistency.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Lansing on

Get them a nice parting gift and say your goodbyes.

I see no reason continuing on with the old day care if the school provides care. It will be a lot easier not only to keep him in a routine but to also be around possible friends.

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answers from Pittsburgh on

It has to end at some time-most things do. While it can be very hard it is just part of life. I was also extremely sad to see my kids leave preschool. We had been a part of the school for years and I knew everyone there very well. But once Kindergarten started for my youngest it was fine and it will be for you too. You and your son will become emeshed in your new routine and the new caregivers and your beloved preschool will be a sweet memory. So my suggestion is to plan on keeping him with the Y people. You can always go back for a visit to your preschool (we thought WE would but never did once) to say hi. But I wouldn't enroll him just because you are sentimental. Doesn't really make a lot of sense. The good think is that if it doesn't work out with the Y you do have a backup.

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answers from Austin on

Wow, the Y will solve your problems. Your son will have friends there already, so spending the no school days will be fun.. If I remember correctly on the No school days, many times the Y takes the kids to the movies or have special events..

These will be even more age appropriate for him.

He is a big boy now and daycare will not be able to offer all of the things the Y can offer an older child.

It is hard to leave daycare.. But your son is going to LOVE school and being around his new friends.

Give the daycare a nice gift.. and thank them for their beautiful care of your son..

When our daughter graduated from High School, I sent an update to her old daycare.. i thanked them for being her first experience with a school type setting and helping her discover, how much she loved school.. I still plan on sending them the update about her graduation from College.

I know so many families feel a lot of guilt about the time our children spend in daycare because we have to work. But I could see how much our daughter thrived and loved all of the people there. I want them to know we are still reaping the benefits of their care.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dover on

I have run into a similiar situation myself. They do before and after care at the elementary school my daughter will be attending and they also do care the days that school is open but the students don't attend. Until they get their new center opened, I have to find care for the days the school is truly closed (holidays beyond those that my work is closed...like the extended Christmas breaks etc.).

What do you plan to do with your son in situations like that? That could give you the opportunity to allow him to "visit" the old daycare and he shouldn't mind that too much.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

Or son goes to the Y after school program and then on days with no school and breaks (christmas/spring) he goes back to his old daycare lady...not a problem for either of them. He enjoys it and so does she. So no you do not need to "break ties".

1 mom found this helpful
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