Newborns

Updated on May 19, 2009
F.V. asks from Columbia, SC
8 answers

I posted a question a few weeks ago and got a lot of good responses so here goes another....My husband's parents came to visit for Mother's Day and they were being grandparents and threw off our schedule completely. So naturally last week we were way off schedule and for some reason it took me a week to realize I needed to go back to my original schedule. First, we changed formulas to the Similac sensitive and both girls are doing so much better, no more gas pains and fussy tummies. When his parents were here they got into the habit of feeding the girls and then holding them until they went to sleep. Oy Vey, right? We have had three exhausting nights because the girls want to cat nap and then not go to sleep until midnight etc. etc. etc.
So our schedule today has been..... Leola woke up at 7:30 and I fed her. Then Lucie at 8:30. I snapped out of the supply and demand and went back to my schedule. I fed both of them at 9:00am even though Leola had already eaten and she only ate a 1/2 ounce but at least she topped off her tummy. I changed them and they played for a bit. They got tired so at 9:30 I put them in their crib AWAKE. That was the first time I did that. They have been crying on and off for about 40 minutes but not more than 30 seconds to a minute at a time. Right now they are both quiet and asleep. For how long, I don't know. So I get to my questions. If they don't go to sleep for their nap, how long should I let them cry and fuss until I take them out o their crib to play? And should I try to put them down every three hours? THey are 7 1/2 weeks now so I don't know if they need so much sleep cause I don't want them to stay awake at night. I read in a parenting magazine from a pediatrician that babies really only need 10-12 hours of sleep a day.
2. Question... If they wake up before 2 1/2 3 hours at night, do I still feed them anyway? Or should I just put their passy back in their mouth, pick them up for a second etc. etc. 3. If they sleep for more than three hours at night, let them sleep right? If they do that, then when they wake up in the morning they will be starving. Should I feed them at that time and then get back as close to the 6,9, 12,3, schedule as soon as possible? Last question.. Let's say one baby slept well and wakes up around 5-6 am to eat. The other one hasn't been asleep since 2-3am since she was having a bad night and she just went to sleep around 5am while the other one is waking up. Should I wake her up after an hour to keep them on the same schedule or should I just let her sleep since she is so exhausted and then try to get her back on schedule? And the baby wise book was wrong about twins. They do wake each other up. :) Sorry for so many questions but out of my and my husband's exhaustion, I am desperate for answers since they didn't come with a manuel. :0

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K.R.

answers from New York on

First, congratulations on twins! Mine are now ten years old. Believe it or not I miss the stage you are in :)
Now, regarding formula. I found carnation formula to be even more gentle then the similac gentle..and its cheaper.
Regarding sleep patterns...when one wakes up, get the other one up. Force them on the same schedule or you will go crazy!!!!
Feeding versus the pacifier...I would feed. They are still so young and growing a lot. Once they get to six months then I would consider the pacifier instead of food.
Good luck and enjoy two of everything....its fun!

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K.P.

answers from New York on

Wow- I love it when we visit my family in Florida, but it takes us at least two weeks to "reprogram"! My sister is expecting twins and it looks like she's in for a real adventure.

I wish I could give you better suggestions, but I will share with you what my pediatrican told me. Keep in mind, he is NOT a "new age" doctor (still does house calls if needed) and he believes in parent instincts as the best indicators of what a child needs, which is why we love him!

I was worried b/c our son was about 8 weeks old and was sleeping 3-4 hours at a time and I was waking him up to eat and then he was crabby. Best advice... DO NOT WAKE A SLEEPIGN BABY! They will wake-up when they need something and will make-up for the calories throughout the day. If your little ones are sleeping longer, that's wonderful.

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S.R.

answers from New York on

Babies that young are not likely to sleep all of the way through the night. the only reason that they would wake up is if they are hungry or in need of contact, otherwise they would probably sleep. Also, at 8 weeks they are becoming more aware of their bodies and it scares them a bit when they realize that there arms and legs can move around. My short answer, you should be resting when the babies rest, and forget about doing anything, especially when your husband is working long hours, but taking care of the babies. This stage does not last long, and you will miss it when it is over (I know you don't believe me now...)

A few people are lucky and get their infants to sleep the entire night. Most people are not. My son woke up hungry every night until he was about 8 or 9 months old. Since your children are twins, they are probably growing a little faster, so they need to be fed that often. Since they have little tummies, they empty fast. I would not deny them food in the night, you could bring on malnutrition. Also, do not worry about hours of sleep as stated in the parenting magazine. Those are guidelines. Also, do not let them go unconforted for too long without answering their crys. They need to learn that mommy and daddy will always be there for them. At this stage of their development, once you leave the room, they think that you are gone forever. If you let them cry, they give up, but they also give up emotionally too, and can be clingy and reserved later. Keeping babies awake for hours on end at this age can also effect their emotional and physical development.

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M.E.

answers from New York on

Hi F.,
I am 30 and a SAHM of fraternal twin girls who are now 16 1/2 months old. I remember what you are going through vividly. The best advice I can give is keep them on the same schedule. When one eats, even if you have to wake the other, have them both eat at the same time. They may not eat the same amount, but try your hardest to keep them on the same eating schedule.
As for sleeping, my pediatrician told me in the first two months a sleeping schedule is hard to maintain, and it is. We did whatever it took to get the girls to sleep. By the third month we were able to establish more of a sleeping routine and they began sleeping through the night.
We also used Similac Sensitive and then changed over to the Enfamil version, our girls responded well to it. They would eat about every 2 hours. It seemed like we were always feeding them, changing them, or trying to get them to sleep. I would be more than willing to offer you my phone number or email if you'd like to talk. It's an extremely tough few months, but it does get easier.
M.

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J.N.

answers from New York on

Hi F.!

I agree with Kim R! I am a mother of twins who was very consistant with schedules, and while some might disagree with me, with being so strick, it kept me a little sane. I kept my two on the same schedule. If one woke up to eat and the other one was still sleeping, I would get her up and feed her. I tried to keep them on the same schedule. Now through the night if they woke up (mine never woke each other up) I would give the passy and let them work it out. I wouldn't let them scream for food if they were hungry, they (most of the time) would go back to sleep. So my advice to you would be try and keep it consistant and together, they will eventually get it.
Good Luck!

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D.M.

answers from New York on

Hi F., the best advice I can give you (mother of a 6 month old who has slept through the night since 8 weeks) is to never wake a sleeping baby! As much as you want them to eat on a schedule, listen to the babies. they will tell you when they are hungry.If they wake at night, feed them and rock them and they should fall back asleep rite away. As they get older, they will wake up less and less during the night and you will notice that they are sleeping 6, 7, 8, plus hours a night. Pretty soon then will be up to 10-12 hours at night with a few naps during the day. My daughter sleeps 12 hours a night and takes 3 30-40 minute naps during the day but every baby is different. I hope this helped a little :)make sure you feed them before putting them down for bed. They sleep better on a full tummy!!

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L.L.

answers from New York on

Not sure what Parenting magazine you have been reading but I wouldn't read it again. Your 7 1/2 week old babies need WAY MORE than 10 to 12 hours of sleep.

In fact my almost 16 month old son still needs between 13 1/2 to 14 hours a sleep each day according to most books.

Your very young babies could still need 18 to 20 hours a day - I would check a reputable source and stop reading that magazine.

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L.D.

answers from Albany on

I have to go back and look at all your questions but had to say IMMEDIATELY, do NOT let 7 1/2 week old babies cry like that! They are much too young. I hate the whole CIO method as it is but for newborns? If they are just fussing that's one thing, leave them be, but if they are out right crying, you need to get them.

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