New SAHM

Updated on April 03, 2012
L.R. asks from Mill Creek, PA
18 answers

I am a new SAHM to my 19 month old DD. I am looking for schedules of other SAHMs, so I can get an idea of how a day would look.

Do you get out of the house everyday? How often do you play with your LO? Do you get any cleaning/cooking done?

Thanks!

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

Hi L.!

Since you just have one child so far, it should be fairly easy to establish a routine with mealtimes and naps.

I get out of the house every day because I'm running to and from school for my older kids, but if I didn't have to do that, I think it would depend on my energy level and the weather. My 2.5 yr old is not always easy to take places (fights getting in his car seat, doesn't want to hold hands in parking lots) so taking him anywhere is usually a struggle.

I try to clean my house on a rotating schedule: laundry on certain days, cleaning the bathrooms and mopping the floors on certain days, dusting/vacuuming on other days. It's easier than trying to clean the whole all in one day.

My little guy is happy to play by himself a lot of the time, but if I can tell he's bored or needs some attention, I sit down and play with him for awhile. It's easier to do this when my older kids are in school. When they get home, they need a lot of time and attention.

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L.O.

answers from Detroit on

I quit my job when my son was born and my daughter was 18 months old.

I was busy with 2 babies.. but I got out of the house every every day..(unless they were sick)

I went to parks, and joined playgroups, I went to malls and kid play places. generally we got up.. got dressed ate breakfast and had somewhere to go in the morning.. we were home for lunch.. then naptime then I had a chance to clean. Taht was my day for several years.. My kids stopped napping at 4 and 5 years.. so now I dont have time to clean.

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

This week - don't even worry about it. :)

My first day as a WAHD, I was positive I'd have all the housework done, several of the Honey-do list checked off, meals cooked from scratch AND get to watch some TV during nap time....and then I'd have the rest of the week free! :)

My first day I cleaned the air cover to the fridge. Didn't accomplish a damn thing the rest of the week :)

But I caught on. Having a schedule was key.

I mapped out nap/feeding schedules, and then filled in my work around that. The more consistent you are, the easier it flows.

Morning is just play-time for our free time after breakfast. We play inside, with toys and together.

Afternoon is some playtime by himself, some housework and running any errands.

Late afternoon is a bit of reading, a walk, a park or just playing outside.

Your mileage may vary, but I can't stress the schedule enough. It was truly life-changing.

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T.B.

answers from Miami on

Go out when you need to, when you want to, and have to. Stay home when you feel like staying home. I'm a SAHM. I have 4 children. 3 in school, the baby is 11 months old. Schedule? Forget it. I wing it. Some days the house gets cleaned, other days I throw caution to the wind and spend the entire day just staring at my baby girl. I breast feed so that ties me to the couch a lot, but I don't mind at all. Everything can wait...but my baby won't be small forever, nor will she be this small forever either. Take it from me with 4 kiddos: They grow fast. Treasure each day, every moment of the day. I don't get much housework done. I do what I can, when I can, when it's absolutely necessary. My baby doesn't nap, nor does she have a schedule but I have a schedule to follow: get up, take other kiddos to school and later pick them up. Everything I do evolves around getting my kiddos to school and home. And yeah, I play with my baby every day.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I have been a sahm for the last 11 years. I always went with the flow. If they were in a good mood I either took them to the park or went to the library or just went for walk. When I needed to clean, I either put them in the pack n play in front of the tv or waited till nap time. They loved the vaccuumn so that was our chasing game. If the weather was bad I always had our one sliding board inside so they could play on that. We also lived in a duplex apartment at the time so we spent a lot of time on the steps.

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H.1.

answers from Des Moines on

Most days I try to do outings in the morning and stay home in the afternoons. This was only do-able after my son dropped his morning nap. After breakfast and getting dressed, etc. we do an outing - usually something kid friendly and fun (library, park, mall play place) but sometimes this means a few quick errands for me or lunch with daddy. Then home for lunch and nap. After nap time we play with toys, outside in the yard, etc.

I have made a habit to never get behind on any dishes/kitchen cleaning and after every meal/snack, I put him down and tell him to go play with toys while mommy cleans up. He's now gotten used to playing alone for about 15 mins after being at the table and I clean the dishes we just made, or do a quick sweep of floors, etc.

I usually start cooking dinner once his dad comes home, so I'm not usually cooking with him around (aside from lunches, which doesn't really count with what I serve for lunch meals.)

Cleaning - I tried to give myself some sort of loose schedule (vacuum Fridays, laundry Monday and Wednesdays, etc.) but it really helps to let him help! He LOVES to follow me around with his toy vacuum, help me "fold clothes" etc. Since I spend so much time with him during the day, when daddy gets home or after dinner - I let them have some one on one time while I do a few cleaning tasks. Always leaving some time for family time, of course!

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L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

I can give you tips on a schedule. it depends on what kind of person you are...are you a morning person? I'm not when it comes to getting up and getting out, so I usually dont plan appointment and such first thing in the morining i usually shoot for things that are after 10am. There are several reasons why I try to do this, one I have other children i have to get off to school, two I never know what might go wrong with my morning to put me behind, and three I hate rushing and being late!
I like to do most of my play in the morning with my DD, we listen to music and dance in the mornings, we watch nickjr in the morning too and sing and dance, we play with her baby dolls feeding them and such. The morning goes by fast and then its lunchtime and then nap time so during naptime i usually am able to get light cleaning done, phone calls, paperwork, or just plain rest cause M.'s tired too!
If i do need to get out to like Target and run errands I will try to get this done before lunchtime to avoid a melt down of any kind because even if i get lunch out, there is always a potential for melt down due to her getting tired and ready for nap. So to avoid this completely i have her in PT daycare so if I need to do things during the day i take her there for about 6 hours and get shopping, cleaning and anything else done.
My schedule is never the same except for breakfast, lunch and nap...they can vary but not by much.
As far as getting out the house everyday, sometimes i am happiest when I dont have anything to do outside of the house and can focus on playing with my daughter in a relaxed environment the day goes fast and smoothe on these days!

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H.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Every mom is different. Personally, I've never been a person who likes to spend a significant amount of time sitting inside my house. So, from very early on my son and I spent most days doing something. Mind you, it wasn't all day long or anything like that because I was also pretty stringent about him napping at home:) However, we usually went out at least once every day. All of my cleaning gets done after he goes to sleep. It makes no sense to me to do it during the day because he just messes it up as I go.

"The child psychologist who thought she had all the answers to parenting until she became one herself." www.themommypsychologist.com

M.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I like not having a schedule, but kids like it to a degree. Generally is get up at 7ish. Breakfast, they help me do some dishes in there own way 1, 3, and 5. Then we color or do some sort of intellectual activity. They get to watch a few cartoons if the weather is bad, if good its a walk or play an hour or so outside. Then its back to playing with toys inside. I make lunch, we fight over it, eat it, clean a little. Then they need their quiet time. They go to there rooms or the play room and play QUIETLY where I get a small break to do my part time stuff, and some cleaning. In no way do I get major cleaning done with out some help from husband or fam. I have to wait for that till dad comes home. After quiet, time its naps for those who take, and some cartoon time for those who dont. Then its back outside, or some sort of cool interactive thing I find to do. Some days like today, that I am so ill. It was nothing. Dad watched them which basically consists of sitting them in front of a TV or yelling at them to behave. :(

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A.P.

answers from Dothan on

I always enjoyed the "getting out of the house days" since it gave me incentive to put on make-up and fix my hair. :) My son and I enjoyed the park and I had other friends that were SAHMs so we had a weekly play-date and alternated having it at our houses.
Just a couple of suggestions for activities so you can check these out in your area. Our local mall has a Mommy & Me class once a month and my hometown library has story-time for young kids every week. Those might prove to be fun for both of you. I found that if I was out of the house for an activity, I could also do errands - quick stop at the grocery store, etc. Being home in time for nap time was ESSENTIAL; otherwise, baby gets tired and cranky, Mom gets stressed and cranky...
When at home, we played together a lot - reading books, playing with trains, Little People sets were also a favorite - he loved the alphabet one that made animal sounds.

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E.S.

answers from New York on

The day depends on the mom and tot.

I am not a homebody by any stretch of the imagination so I have something planned everyday. I live in a quiet rural area so I MUST get out for stimulation :-)

DD, who is two, and I are both very active so we usually incorporate a park or indoor playground, weather permitting, several times a week.

Other days I hook up with my local moms clubs--preplanned activities, yaya!

But a typical day goes something like this:
Wake between 7:30-8 p.m. DD "helps"me do dishes. Then we play for a bit. Breakfast. Shower (for me) and then out the door.

We stay out until naptime: 1:30-2. During that time I work out and tidy up.

Rest of afternoon, post nap we run a quick errand or two.

What I don't get done in housework during the week, gets conquered on the weekend. I'd rather spend my time with DD than cordone her off because of cleaning!

Good luck.

J.B.

answers from Houston on

I recently mapped out a schedule like our dad poster and it ended up being a 14 hr day with like a 15 minute break!!! But that is my fault since I chose to have three little darlings :D But he is so right that a schedule is key. When I was in service/sales I would map out my day before I got started. When I had one child man, my schedule was rock solid. We had Monday as a free day together at home. Tuesday was this little jumping playland and the library, Wednesday was usually a lunch with Grandma, Thursday was the library again and Friday was groceries. I would run my errands a little before naptime and he would just crash in the car and I would pop him right in bed. I had a cleaning schedule of two rooms per day and kept the house clean each week. It was the bomb and oh so doable. But as our fellow dad said, this week, chill, it isn't an overnight thing you adjust and get better all the time, but a roughed out schedule will really help! I am still working it out as I just added my newest addition but seeing it on paper helps me so much. So maybe jot down some ideas about how you would like your day to flow and go from there. I have learned that you don't have to run a child to have a good day. I always thought I could never just be in the house etc, but now with three I have way to much going on to get out sometimes and I do fine. Sometimes with my first I wish I would have just stayed home with him more and just chilled, it was the only time I was going to have just one child you know? Welcome to the full time child raising club, it's the best job in the world even on the days you want to pull your hair out :)

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

No matter what I did, I always also adhered to my kids nap, times.
And I was home then.
My kids napped ever since they were babies.
And it created a battle-free routine.
For example, I would never run errands at my kids' nap times.
I was home then.
I did most of my errands, in the morning. Before nap time.

Every SAHM, knows what they need to do everyday.
So then you do it.
Of course, around the waking/feeding/napping schedule/routine of your child.

Some days we went out.
Some days we did not.
No biggie.
And we played.
And I got my housecleaning & cooking done too.
And when you are doing those things, (depending on how old your child is), then the home should be safety proofed and either put child/baby in a Superyard type thing when you are doing cooking or housework.
But sure, you still always have to keep an eye on the child.

A.S.

answers from Iowa City on

We don't really have a set schedule but what happens more often than not is as follows:

Breakfast.
Take #1 to preschool.
Either run errands with #2 or come home. If we come home #2 plays while I empty and load the dishwasher.
Play with and/or read with #2.
Get lunch ready.
Husband and #1 arrive home for lunch.
Husband goes back to work.
Children go play or watch a show while I clean up from lunch.
We play outside or go for a walk.
#2's nap time.
Play and read with #1.
#1's quiet time (time in her room to rest, play quietly).
Laundry/general housework.
Husband gets home. He plays with the girls or we do something together.
I get dinner ready.
Clean up from dinner.
Bath time for the children.
They play some more and/or watch a show.
Brush teeth. Read books. Girls go to bed.
Adults to whatever they want/need. Adults go to bed.

Of course there is showering thrown in there at random times and I have to take the dogs out throughout the day.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I always found it helpful to do O. errand and O. out of the house activity per day. That was the median--the "idea". Some days the planets line up, some days they don't!

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

At that age I HAD to get out of the house with my son. I wasn't a homebody like the other moms I knew. Out the door by 8am because of the heat and it was cooler in the morning, to go to our town park for about an hour. We played ball, read books, clap and sing and visited with the other early morning risers...I always had some sort of different activity like bubbles or fans or a water toy each day. Then we either ran errands or headed to a museum or indoor playland...something indoors with air conditioning by mid morning. Or sometimes I would just take him to the grocery store or the mall and let him walk around while I followed him around. That was nice on the days I didn't have any shopping to do and we could just walk around. Lunch was always packed snacks like dried fruit, crackers. We got home around 1 or 2p...NAPTIME! Then I would clean up, do housework and stuff until about 4. We'd play for a bit and then I'd always give him something to play in the kitchen like pots and pans or old tupperware, while I fixed dinner. Then Daddy would come home, we'd have family dinner, and the boys would play while I cleaned up dinner. Playing with Daddy usually meant going with him to work in the yard or change a lightbulb or something. Bedtime routine started at 6 - bath, books and then lights out. We had a good sleeper and he always went right to bed at 7pm. Looking back I think it was important for me to teach him to play on his own for 15-20 mins at a time (not unsupervised of course). I played with him all the time but when I needed to do something, like cook dinner or put a load in, he knew to play with whatever I gave him until I could give him my full attention again.

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S.W.

answers from Amarillo on

When my two were young (newborn and 3 year old) I had a "Daily Duties" schedule on the frig. It took a bit to get it there but it sure did help.

I broke down the morning and afternoon on it by time. It included naps and lunch and play time in the park and baking homemade bread twice a week. The schedule worked so well that I could do more and have extra time to things for myself.

Just work on what will work for your family. I was and am an early riser type person and so were the kids. Nap time in the afternoon was for all of us.

Try it and change what doesn't work.

The other S.

PS Please add "me" time to the list. It could just be taking a bath without interruption or a walk around the block by yourself.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

We don't get out of the house daily, but we did get out more when I was strictly SAHM and not working.

I suggest you find a Meet Up. Typically the activities are local, low cost and you can meet other parents with kids in your child's age group. Ours has been WONDERFUL.

DD and I get out at least 1x a week for a social activity, but often more. It depends on what's going on. Sometimes we also host playdates or visit friends. Sometimes we just take a nature walk on our own.

You get cleaning done around the child or when the child naps or when your spouse is home. Same with cooking. As DD has gotten older she "helps" so cooking includes her doing things like pouring and mixing.

I play with my DD throughout the day. She takes after DH and plays solo well and when she was younger I'd keep the gates up so she was in the same room with me, as if it was a very large playpen. We have a loose schedule, but typically we get up around the same time, get breakfast, have play time, then lunch, etc. When she napped, I tried to be home before the nap so she wouldn't melt out and about but she also napped well in the car or stroller, too.

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