"Needing Advice on Balancing Children and Chores"

It is definatly important to focus more time on the kids then the house. But then I totally understand the need to keep a neat home. I work, have three children and my husband has a schedule where he works most nights and weekends, so the balancing act is already against me. As far as the cleaning goes it's just a matter of up-keep really. Once a week I'll sweep, vacume and give the house a good once through. The rest of the week I'm the first one up and last to bed. I use that time to pick up what needs to be, throw a load in the laundry, wash and put away the dishes. This way I can enjoy my time with the kids and my husband and feel really good about it. We all eat in one place play in another so it's not like little messes are breaking out all over the house and if your keeping after it regularly then the workloads not all that big. You don't want to look back at this time when the kids are a little older and think "Man our house looked great, but what else did we do?"

Racqual, The dirt is always going to be there but your kids are only going to be the age they are once. Pick a chore a day to do and enjoy your kids. Have your seven year old help with the chores. I do that with my kids. It's a way for them to contribute to the household. Just like we work for our family they need to help out to. Make it fun. Give her a reward when it is done. What ever she is into. Nothing huge, just a little token. I hope this helps you from going crazy. But just remember we have all been there and i'm sure we will be there again. Good luck! You sound like you are a GREAT MOM! From, W.

Seriously. I think we can all relate. I have a three year old and a 4 month old. It's exhausting and between balancing the baby time and cleaning time, my three year old is left entertaining herself most days. I've found that it's easiest to clean up the main areas quickly once I've put the girls to bed and if any of the mess in the living room belongs to my daughter she helps clean up before she goes to bed. As for the bathrooms, I think the suggestion of cleaning when you use things is the most efficient way to clean. Cleaning the bathtub when I shower is the only way it will get clean. The only way I can keep up with the dishes is to wash them immediately after we use them. It helps to relieve a little stress when my husband takes on a few chores here and there.. usually all I can get him to do is take out the trash and wash dishes every now and then but it really helps. My three year old loves to help with everything but can't really do a good job so with a seven year old you have a great helper. At that age though, I'm sure it's already become a chore as opposed to wanting to show off what she can help with. It's impossible to keep on top of everything so you really have to pick your battles or you will go crazy! Good luck to you!!

One of my best friends said " Housework will always be there". How true is that. It never goes away but your children on the other hand are constantly growing and changing and one day will not be there. There has to be a very marked balance. It is of high importance that your children do see that you have a sense of responsibility towards your home but at the same time you must spend quality time with your children because at the end what is really going to matter? That you had a clean house? I do not know if I make sense but you really have to organize your time without killing yourself and still try to make time for your children. The only suggestion I have is to break down your week as far as chores. Monday you wash and fold clothes all day. Tuesday you sweep and dust. Wednesday bathrooms and major kitchen. Thursday sweep and dust and Friday you just do major picking up. Saturday and Sunday thorough cleaning. I also have a clutter free home. I do not collect anything or have knick knacks everywhere. I try to have a place for everything and have the children and husband follow that rule. It takes all the patience I have but with patience and consistency I have managed to keep my life simple and have some sanity left to smile!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope this helps!!!!!!

Hi, I only have one child however I can relate to the neat compulsive freak issue. I was (and admit deep down still am to an extent) the extreme compulsive. Before dd arrived had to clean house at least once weekly. Husband and I both work and share watching our dd so chores sometimes go wayside. We however have begun playing cleaning games w/our dd and she loves it (sweeping, dusting, wiping cabinets etc.). Maybe the kids can help? Perhaps you can complete one area of the house or one small chore per day. Rather than focusing on the whole house in one sitting we do one chore at a time and our reward afterwards is either an allowance, new hair pretties or a fun excursion. Hope this helps, good luck!

I understand your urge to clean. I am a cleaning machine. I have 2 boys ( 8 yr.,2yro. and 1 on the way). I take 2 mornings to get my cleaning done. The first morning I clean the bathrooms,Kitchen, and dust. The next morning I vacuum and mop the floors. I have had a hard time when my house isn't perfectly clean 24/7, but they are only little once and I know when they get older it won't be an issue and they will have chores of their own. Sometimes if the upstairs needs a little vacuuming, then I will vacuum it. I invested in a great hand vac to help keep the kitchen floor clean from my 2 yro after he's eaten and it's great if our entry way tile gets some dirt on it. This way, I am not dragging my regular vacuum out all the time. NOTE: I get up around 6 am to get a jump start on my cleaning. Good Luck !

Years ago I had the same problem. Although I had 4 boys, ones his and ones mine both 10 and our 2 year old and infant. My girlfriend came over because I was pulling my hair out. She promptly took all my glass figurines of the shelf and placed them in a towel and put them in a box and handed them to me to put away for now. Unless it was hanging on the wall, all my pictures were boxed up and anything that had to be moved to clean was removed. She brought a timer with her and handed it to me. She announced you have 5 minutes to pick up this room today. You will be cleaning each room in this manner. I was dumbfounded. When I got to the last room, she said I had 30 minutes to clean it. She said tomorrow, I will start in this room I just cleaned and that you should start with a different room each time so that by the time the week ends, you've cycled through all of them evenly. Then she got out the dust rag and the vacuum and without all the clutter, it was a breeze to dust and polish and vacuum. She dumped cleaner in the toilet and said I could scrub the toilet when I used it next and that I could scrub the shower when I got in it to bathe, and clean the sink when I brushed my teeth. She showed me how to put yesterdays newspaper on the floor in front of the stove before I cooked so after dinner all I had to do was roll up the paper and dispose of it. I learned how to wash and put away what I had finished using in the kitchen the very minute it was no longer needed. I would line up all the ingredients prior to beginning the meal so that there were fewer last minute changes. The 10 year olds took turns emptying the dishwasher first thing in the morning. She forbide me to even wash a dish; they dishwasher will do a good job and if not, then you can clean the item. I learn how to have a clean home by 9 am every morning. Believe me, your children will never notice the dust and they are only little once. Get rid of the clutter is the secret. Having a place for everything and everything in it's place is a time saver and a stress reducer. Hey, if you just gotta spend time cleaning, get up real early and clean before you child wakes up and take a nap when he does so you can still have time for hubby once you child is in bed.

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Life is too short and you must live life to the fullest. Carpe Diem! Good Luck! F.

HI,

Check out FLYLADY.NET great site.. and good stuff for you 7 year old as well.
Lots of support there and good suggestions.

M.

if someone out there has real advice please let the rest of us know. I am in a similar boat... can't beat it. get done what you can but your kids are way more important... let the dishes go tonight,,, bring out the tickle monster or the read-a thon or or or.... my daughter brings me ou t of my nightmare when she says Mommy I miss mommy and me time... good luck P.