I try to feed my daughter a low carb diet, not necessarily for behavioral issues ... but more because I know it is healthier for her and all of us.
I have not found one "all in one source" for information. I've gathered it from lots of different places. Dr. Sears, NourishMD.com, and other internet searches as well as books. Many of these have already been mentioned. What I would suggest is going slow. Don't just go cold turkey. You may even consider doing it over a period of time longer then 2 weeks. It's a mind game (as well as the physical withdrawls of sugar! And yes, they are REAL. I did the South Beach diet several years ago and you 'detox' from ALL sugar including fruit for 2 weeks. OIY! Talk about cravings!!!!!) you take away one 'treat' and replace it with something else. They get used to it and then don't miss the treat.
Do your kids go for veggies? My daughter loves a snack of celery or raisins. You can also do celery sticks with organic peanut butter and raisins. Vitamins AND protein!
Basically, our snacks revolve around fruit and veggies. For dinners I do a lot of salads as a larger part of the meal to accompany the meat. We do pasta maybe once a week and then I get the organic whole grain pasta.
It was suggested you shop at Whole Foods... which I LOVE. But quite honestly, they are not budget family ... certainly not for a family of 4. You can do quite a bit of wholesome, organic shopping at Meijer. They have come a long way. There are tons of resources out there for real food diets. You just have to do a little homework, gather your information and then start implementing.
One thing I like to do is make morning muffins. (typically the night before) I modified a great carrot cake recipe. I use a fraction of the sugar, carrot, apple, raisin, divide the flour between all purpose, wheat, and oat and also throw in a some flax seed. You can get it at Meijer in the 'healthy' section. It's even available in packets... you just throw one packet into your recipe.
Flax seeds are a great source of good fats that kids needs...those coveted omegas.
Also, have you considered some cod liver oil? You can get it in tablets or liquid ... and you can get it flavored! My daughter takes the peach liquid every day... and loves it! Nordic Naturals is the best brand. Their processing keeps it as pure as possible so you are getting the maximum benefit. Also NourishMD advocates a multivitamin...they recommend Kids Vibe. We haven't tried it yet, but we're going to. I do know a mom who uses it on her three boys and she really likes it.
Making sure the kids are getting the good fats and nutrients they need is important to good behavior.
Just so you know, NourishMD is a great site. It's run by a pediatrician and nutritionist.... out of ANN ARBOR! I've heard these ladies speak and they are wonderful. They are passionate about teaching moms how to feed their kids REAL food. Here's one thing to consider when you're trying to make this change..... 4 grams of sugar... = ONE packet of sugar. You know...those little packets you get at restaurants for your coffee. Yeah...1=4 grams. So...take a look at the labels on those pretzels and see how many grams of sugar and then try to not fall over when you realize how many packets of sugar your guys just consumed!
Oh, and stay away from the flavored yogurts. Those are AWFUL! I didn't realize how many grams of sugar they have. We now do the organic PLAIN yogurt and I flavor it with some honey or jam. My daughter eats it no problem. Plus, it's cheaper that way!
You can do this. If your husband isn't on board, do it for your kids. Teach your kids how to make healthy choices... they will be so much better for it in the long run. Your husband is most likely set in his ways and doesn't see the benefits of a healthy diet. Don't force it. You can't change a person. You can only present information and then THEY have to change. You CAN influence your kids. And yes, you will have to deal with the 'daddy eats them!' issue. Just approach it lovingly and say that for YOU KIDS this is a healthier choice.