Need Advice with Helping My 5 Yr Old with TBI

You are not doing anything wrong. TBI has many facets of impairments in children. Only a medical doctor can diagnose that. How is her attention at home? Many 5 year olds do not sit still "sometimes". If it is only sometimes, when is it? Is it when the class is doing a large group activity and the class noise level is high? Is it only when they are doing independent work? How does she react in large groups? Does she have difficulty with noise? You can always try medication and see if you notice positive changes.

Just to repeat others, look into their diet. I highly recommend The Kid Friendly ADHD autism Cookbook. It explains why foods may cause behavioral or developmental issues in children and what kinds of foods to avoid. My children have milk, but no wheat (or artificial stuff, dyes, ect.) It's really made a huge difference in them.

S., mom to 3 special needs little girls

Hi F.-

You can certainly talk to her pediatrician about the behavior and attention issues that the teacher is seeing to see if there is anything else going on or if it's all related to the injury or if it's just your daughter being 5! I am wondering does your daughter's injury qualify her under section 504 at her school? My son has Asperger's and has a 504. In my son's case there really aren't any modifications made for him yet, but we get together with the teachers every year to have one in place anyway so that when something comes up we can immediately address it. A 504 allows you and the teachers to modify various things to fit your daughter. For example, to pay attention and stay focused your daughter may need her desk to be away from the window or near the teacher, etc. The teacher may have to provide additional instruction or simplify the instructions on a worksheet so that she can complete it. Anything that can be implemented by the teacher to help in the areas that she is struggling with can be addressed. Having the 504 meetings also just gives you an opportunity to talk to the teachers about your daughters issues and creates teamwork between you and the teachers (when it's done right :-)).

Good luck,
K.

kindergarden is a new experience for her, probably a new school, more kids , new teacher. Before you go to the meds try some things out. Play school with her at home. First you be the teacher and if she gets up or isnt paying attention be the teacher and correct her. then let her be the teacher and you the student, act out and let her correct you. then perhaps play for real. tell her now lets stop being silly and act like its REALLY school and i wont be silly. remember shes five there suppose to be wiggly and in there own world. kindergarden is the time when we learn new things along with how to behave in school. there are a lot of moms that put there kids on meds for acting like a kid. if you girl really truly needs it then by all means. but more often than not its just teachers not being able to controll students because students dont realize how they should act in certian situations. * i agree with Nadine K food and sleep have alot to do with behavior.

There are things you can do to help her.

Ask her teacher to place her desk on the side or back of the classroom and allow her to stand up at times to do her work.

And/or Buy a cushion designed for this purpose. They have little air filled cushions that she can sit on that make her move in order to sit still. Sounds funny, I know. But, it works. You can buy them through special education sources like Abilitations (School Specialty). They also have one now for your feet that will allow you to fidget with your feet, etc. And yet, she won't be bothering anyone.

They also have weighted vests. It calms many kids down. It's like a constant hug. She could wear one over or under her clothes.

I heard of a teacher that when a specific student would get too restless, the teacher would ask him to go do an errand (or just take a walk around the school) and when he returned he was much calmer.

My husband works with ADD and autistic kids and these things can help. I'm not saying your kid has any problems. I am saying that they can help fidgety kids gain some control.

Some kids just can't sit still for too long. Talk to your child and make sure she understands that. Also, make sure she doesn't have to to go to the bathroom. My son will get extra energy when he needs to go and refuses to admit that is the problem. :-)

They do not diagnose ADHD until age 7. I am not sure exactly why, but before the age of 7 the tests are not reliable.

Do not rush to medicate!! Is she a "young" 5 (birthday within the last few months) or an "old" 5 turned five before May? If she is a young 5 then really really don't worry she is still getting ready for kindergarten. Sitting still for long periods of time could just be something new to her. Do you make her sit still for up to an hour at a time at home?

It sounds like you are doing everything right...take a deep breath. You can play "school" with her like suggested below...and even practice sitting still together reading a book or doing coloring pages. And talk to her about school, what she likes/dislikes/the other kids/the teacher/etc. I bet she will be full of information about her classroom.

And if it was her speech therapist who "diagnosed" the TBI like reading your entry above suggests...talk to your ENT or pediatrician about that, because maybe her diagnosis isn't the most reliable. I am sure they should have done MRIs and various tests to see where the damage is in the brain and then let you know how to use therapy to help rewire the damaged area.

Most of all...take a deep breath (again), you are doing great (if you weren't you wouldn't be freaked out!!) Keep checking back with the teacher for updates on her progress and give her a few weeks to adjust, then if you are still worried call her pediatrician.
HUGS!!

First of all, you're not doing anything wrong and everything is going to be okay. Traumatic Brain Injury affects everything about our hardwiring - and depending on where the injury was, the extent of the damage, etc., it can affect a LOT of her life.

My mom had traumatic brain injury as an adult and she had to relearn everything. Her moods and behaviors ran the spectrum and for a great deal of time she could not control her emotions. I can't imagine what that might have been like for a middle aged woman to experience!

The good news is that your daughter is just a small kiddo, and at the age of 5, she has plenty of time to keep wiring and re-wiring her neural networks. See, if the brain runs into a serious roadblock such as damages, it will figure out a way around the roadblock and figure out how to keep on going. Just remember it will take time. She's very young and has a big hurdle. But she's young and she'll learn her way around it and become a successful woman :D

And honestly, no i don't think she should be on medication as a child. I STILL have trouble focusing, paying attention, and I'm lucky if I even remember the task I started out with! On one hand, it sounds totally normal that your daughter is having those issues - she's having to learn things the first time around and might be exceptionally bored. It's not normal to ask a kid to sit still for an entire day of kindergarten. I can't even sit still for an entire day of college without fidgeting and overcoming exceptional boredom. It's beautiful outside and she might just need to run around and play! A lot of the greatest minds in history had trouble staying on the tasks denoted as societally normal...you'd run over to their houses and they'd be a wreck...because they were using all that fabulous brain power on some other facets of existence and contributed greatly to our species!

Perhaps there's a little ADHD in the mix due to the injury or whatever. I'd personally wait until she's WAAAAAY older before medicating her. If you add medication then you are giving the brain another hurdle to figure it's way around. And then there's no telling how it's going to rewire itself and what the long term effects will be. Meds can really help adults but let the brain figure itself out first...remember at some point she'll even be a teen with all sorts of chemical changes going on!

Did the specialist who diagnosed her suggest she go through any sort of OT or recovery training to learn to work with her injury? If that diagnosis was made, it seems like he or she would have some suggestions about therapy and training for her brain :D

Just have a TON of patience with her and her learning processes, they might be slowed or just odd. She had brain damage from an injury, it will take time to heal. But I promise, it WILL HEAL! God Bless you guys! Maybe join a group of other parents out there with similar issues to deal with? If there's not one already, start one...it never hurts to have others to discuss important issues with...but remember you don't have to dwell and this will get better :)

Hi F.,
I hate that your daughter has had to go thru this trauma. Here is what i would do if she were my child.
Just because she is 5 does not mean she is ready for the structure of kindergarten. I would take her out for this year. If she is 6 she will have matured a little more and be more ready for the structured classes. It will not hurt her, in fact it will most likely help her as she advances in school........
I would not put her on any medication to "calm her down" or make her "sit still". that is the teachers and the school system easy way out and the way they gain control over the children- is to have them all on meds.
If your dr. prescribes meds for her that would be different.
Now, during the next year you can work with her at home about "growing up" and "sitting still in class"........she will be fine
You are not doing anything wrong- just let her take her time in getting ready for school days.
good luck and blessings

I don't know anything about TDI, but I have a friend that encountered problems similar to your's daughter's behavior & she took him off of anything with red dye in it, weiners, koolaid ect & cut his sugar content. Red dyes & high sugar content can cause children to be hyper or unsettled. It did help him sit still longer & pay attention better. She even got some sort of pills from GNC for him but I can't remember what they are. They do have some called "attentive child" they are chewable but i'm not sure if this is what she used or not. I myself am against prescription medications to calm children down unless it is absolutely the last resort. I have a grandson that takes something but only during school, he doesn't take it at home, nor in the summer, only the dose for school because he could not sit still & pay attention. I was not fond of the idea when she told me he was on it, but His mom says it helps him, so who am I to judge? :)
Good luck!

I don't know what TBI is, but her symptoms sound a little like ADHD to me. Has she seen a neurologist or psychiatrist? Since her accident was a head injury, I would start by taking her to a neurologist. Get all the professional help you can get to get her the help she needs -- and you, too! Good luck

Hi F.. What makes you think that you have done something wrong? Some children just have difficulty settling into a new situation. If the teacher thinks that it is a big enough issue then take it to the next level and have her tested to see if the classroom is stimulating enough for her. She could simply be bored and need more of an academic program. Sorry to hear about the accident but she was spared and that is a blessing in itself. I am not sure what TBI is. Take things in baby steps. Good luck and God bless.

L.

First of all--hang in there! There are lots of places to get help, and you've taken the first step asking for it.

My first recommendation would be to seek a DOCTOR's advice. I don't believe a speech path is qualified to diagnose traumatic brain injury. What does your pediatrician say? Have you talked to him about this? Has he given you any directions about what to do for your daughter?

At the very least, she needs to be evaluated by a medical doctor who can determine whether she does, indeed, have TBI or some learning disability or hyperactivity disorder (that I suppose could be caused by her accident).

Once you get a firm diagnosis, the doctor will tell you where to get help for your daughter, be it therapy, referral to a specialist, or whatever.

I think once you get some answers, you'll feel better. Try not to look at anything other than what you need to do TODAY. If you try to anticipate the future, you'll only do some uncessary worrying. I know--I have a 27-year-old autistic son who is significantly mentally disabled. All of his life, I have learned to address today's problems today. Of course, planning for the future is a good thing, as long as you are putting safeguards in place and not obsessing about the worst case scenario.

Stay the course, F.. Your little girl is blessed to have a Mom who wants so much to do right by her.

F.,
First of all I would definetly have her back at the pedi, since she has other issues and ask his advice. Then second I would cut back on sugar CUT OUT any soda. Then I would have her tested for FOOD allergies, it is known ( and i have several friends) that have crazy behavior that are allergic to food, not the normal type of allergies you would recognize. Especially wheat or dairy products. I would definetly do at least these three BEFORE you consider medicating your child. i'm not one that would every say to place children on medication, I think there is always a bette solution.

Hi,

It looks like you have gotten a lot of advice. I just finished a book, Driven To Distraction by Hallowell. It is an EXPERT'S advice on AD/HD and I thought it was wonderful. I just bought one on Amazon.com and mailed to my sister who has an older son in trouble. People are born with ADD so head injury may not have caused it. Read the book to find out about symptoms and HELP! L.

Could you please tell this old grandmother what TBI is?
aLSO, I think the speech therapist might be the one to consult if she has been seeing your daughter for a long time.

Speech therapist are very knowledgable people.

Good luck,
J.

First and foremost - stop blaming yourself....you're in unchartered territory and exploring options and ideas. The fact that you're asking for help and advice means you're doing everything RIGHT.

Since her speech therapist gave you the diagnosis of TBI - ask her what your next step should be. What do you do to help your daughter? Is there a specialist you should see? There are pediatric neurologist associated with the various hospitals. If your insurance calls for a referral, make an appointment with your pedi and get one. Sometimes the appointment calendar is long - so the quicker the better.

Keep researching, stay focused on finding information and most importantly, stay strong for your daughter and let her see how strong you can be which in turn will make her strong.

If she has been given the diagnosis of a TBI. I would definitely check with Centre for Neuro Skills in the Dallas area www.neuroskills.com

They have programs for children to learn ways to cope with the out of control feelings and can teach compensatory strategies for staying on task etc. Hope this helps!