Need Advice on Putting 2 Year Old to Bed

Once you switch him to the twin bed you should try the Supper Nanny technique. When you put them to bed say, "It's time to go to bed now honey, I love You" When they get out of bed the first time, you say, "It's time to go to bed." Then every time after that you carry them to bed and put him back without saying anything. It will be a misserable couple of days but it will work.
Let me know what happens.

S.

Sounds like you are doing a beautiful job of handling the situation. It is a phase and he will outgrow it, although sometimes it seems as if it will never end. You will have trouble again when you switch him to a regular bed...so I would just do it now and get it all over with at once instead of getting this problem solved and then starting over again. Hang in there!
Kara - mom to 4 boys

Have you ever watched Super Nanny on T.V.? I found a clip for you. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X--dq2JzK_s

Hope that helps.

K.,

Read him a story and then rub his back until he falls to sleep. Soemtimes they just need to feel your presence. For safety, put the bug mattress on the floor for a couple of weeks. This will help him ger used to the bed and if rolls out- he won't have far to fall. The most improtant thing is consistency and don't "give in". Be nice, love your baby- it all works out.

Jen

Hi K.!

It sounds like he's normal to go through more sleeping changes. I've noticed with my kids, that this is the age they "changed" routines......again :o)

I think you're lucky to have him actually fall back asleep still on his own, even though it's taking more time and patience on your part. If it were my kids, I would stick with what you're doing until he's "finished" adjusting through "whatever it is" he's going through.

At this age, I remember, my boys were "more aware" of their rooms. They noticed "shadows" and things which started to scare them at night. So, I actually would lay in there a little before they came into bed to "see" what they saw in their dark rooms. It was amazing how the different shadows/silhoette's showed up after the lights went out. I had to change things around, put them away different, always make sure the closet door was closed, etc..before they came into their room. Almost to the point where I was "cleaning" prior to bedtime. One of my boys had Night Terror's at this age, so it didn't really matter, 'cause I was probably getting up twice anyway. But it DID help with laying down and going to sleep...a little more anyway, mine weren't as good as yours about falling asleep on their own :o)

Keep doing what you're doing....it's sounds like he's doing truly wonderful, and KUDO'S to you for making him feel comfortable falling asleep in his own bed for so long! I would have LOVED that feeling of "accomplishment" with this area of baby-raising.

I think you're right to "hold off" on a Big Boy Bed until he's back to being "a secure sleeper" again. And if he doesn't adjust, well.......Mamsource will be here for you then, too!

Have a nice weekend!

N.

In brief, keep him in the crib. My son went through the exact same thing. We kept him in the crib (he just turned 3) and the crying phase only lasted a month or so. He is still a great sleeper (12 hrs a night!) and he still takes good naps in his crib.
Smiles,
S.

We just did this. Night time is going ok, it's the morning that's problematic because she can get up on her own and go do whatever, like make herself toast in the microwave while mommy & daddy are sleeping! (we moved the microwave)
I would say start on a thursday or friday nite so you have the weekend, and keep doing what you're doing and when he gets out of bed lead him back and post yourself out side the door. Hopefully he'll get the drill before Sunday nite. Be firm!!! These little negotiators can be very persuasive!
M.

I agree w/the other moms....keep him in his crib unless you really need it for a new baby. Even then, you can prolong his time in the crib by having the baby sleep in a pac-n-go, cradle or bassinet for a few more months. If you have no immediate need to get him out of the crib, you shouldn't mess w/his routine until he seems to be over this phase of crying/whimpering before he goes to sleep. Our older son was in his crib til 3. He never climbed out & in fact, I was teaching him to climb in cuz he was getting too heavy for me to hoist him in. Our second son, now 2 3/4yrs, started climbing out of the crib at about 2 yrs. Every night he was out & in several times before falling asleep. Finally, when he was 2.5 yrs, we took out the crib & out him in the bottom bunk of the bunk beds. I was tired of all the out & in business, plus our boys share a room that is small & made smaller by the crib so now w/it gone, there's more breathing room. He's gotten used to the freedom of the bed & might get out once before staying in to go to sleep but if possible, I woulda preferred to keep him in the crib longer. So, like the old saying, don't fix what ain't broke. Good luck!

This happenend to us as well. I have a 3 yr. old and it stopped probably less than a week. Just try not to go in there as much or pick him up otherwise you might find yourself in a new routine. Just stay strong and it will one day be back to normal. Obviously, if there is something that scares him try to console him, but otherwise it will stop. Our son has always been such a great sleeper. We lay him down on this crib wide awake and sometimes we hear him talking to his stuffed animals or singing. He falls asleep on his own. It's great. I know it's hard to hear him cry, but we didn't want to create a new routine for him (him crying and us being there until he fell asleep). My son is still in his crib. He doesn't try to climb out of it and therefore why change something that he is comfortable with.

Good luck

My advice, if it isn't broke don't fix it. He can stay in his crib another year or so. My rule of thumb is that when they start to want to climb out, they are ready for a "big bed". Just enjoy the time he is still snuggly in his crib.
L.

Hi K.,
He is 2 and a good sleeper (a good sleeper can fuss for a few minutes after going to bed - don't worry about it, do what you are doing now as it is working and your doing a great job!). Why do you want to put him in a bigger bed at 2? Is he too big for his crib or do you want to re-decorate? A "Big Bed" is best earned and not given. You already worry he will climb out of the big bed so why not just keep the crib another year or so? At least the crib provides some protection for 2 year olds. I wish you well. Patti

Sounds like your night time routine is working so keep at it. When it comes time to switch to a "big boy" bed get him excited about it. Let him pick out the sheets & comforter. Take it one step at a time, start with naps only in the twin bed. This way it becomes a familar place when it's time to switch for good.
If your afraid of him getting out of bed in the middle of the night, make sure it's dark in the areas of the house you don't want him in, like the kitchen. Have nights lights in areas of the house you don't mind him in, like the hallwall so he can find his way to your room if he truely needs you. And the bathroom. He needs to feel comfortable getting up by himself at night especially since the next chapter is potty training. Good luck.

I would say to keep in his crib for as long as you can. You didn't state a reason why you were planning to switch him into a twin bed, but you really should make sure he's mentally ready for it & not just physically ready. I have b/g twins & my son is much much bigger than my daughter & we converted his crib into a toddler bed when he was 18 mos old because he was so big & was constantly climbing out of it. My husband & I figured that at least the toddller bed was closer to the ground & we wouldn't have to worry about him falling down from so high up (he never did though, he's a great climber). In his crib, he would do the same as your son did at first, babble for awhile & then fall asleep. He didn't cry before falling asleep, but my daughter used to & I did what you did & she eventually grew out if it & now she's so easy to put to bed. Anyway, when my son had the freedom to come & go out of his bed without effort of climbing, bedtime turned into a game for him & a hassle for us! No matter how much we would tell him he needed to stay in bed, he would get out several times & we would put him back in bed several times. It finally came to the point where I actually had to stay in his room in the dark, by his door to make sure he didn't get out of bed because if he saw me there, he wouldn't get out. Then I had to wait until he was almost asleep before I could escape. Needless to say, though he had the size & physical ability to not be in a crib anymore, he definately did not have the mentality. If we could do it over again, we would've kept him in a crib longer. He's almost 3 & we're just now thinking about moving him into a twin bed because he's almost too tall for his toddler bed, but we're probably going to wait a few more months until he is 3 & is more mentally able to handle the transition. Hope this helps.

I learned that each night when you are putting him to bed, sit in a chair right next to the crib and read to him or whatever it is you do. Each night move the chair a little farther away. Soon, he will hopefully feel comfortable of knowing you are there and as you move farther away each night eventually he will go to sleep in knowing the routine that he is safe and you are close by. Once you can put him down and you have moved the chair out of the room, both of you will feel much better. It is a separation anxiety issue. Or, if you really want to put him ina real bed, in the beginning, just put the mattress on the floor so he won't get hurt and then be patient and talk to him at his level if he tries to get out and keep putting him back in the bed. Be strong and don't get frustrated.
Good luck!

I put a gate at my sons door so it's like locking him in but he knows he must stay in his room all night. This was because he wouldn't stay in his bed after we moved him to a toddler bed. Amother friend did this as well and it is working for her. You may still get the crying but that is all very normal with this age since they go through mommy withdrawel again and again. 2 yr. olds know how to work you and are very smart, just keep that it mind. Stick to your guns and be strong.

I think you should keep him in the crib. When my son was two, we actually added a crib tent to his bed so he wouldn't climb out. Initially he didn't like it but after a couple days he really loved it; it helped him feel safer and more secure. He's now nearly three and sleeping in a toddler bed but climbs out every night to be in our bed. Music can help bedtime be less scary, too.

Continue the bedtime routine a little bit longer in his room once he's in bed. With my daughter at his age, ahead of time I talked to her about how after I put her to bed, it's my "mommy time" to finish up my chores and relax a little on my own. Then at bed time after reading her a story in bed, I would lay down with her for a few minutes. I weaned myself from her room by singing songs (or listening to songs on the CD). I would say, I'll lay down with you for 5 songs but then I need to go... then after a few nights 4 songs, then 3 and so on. Now I simply just turn the music on for her. Anyway, that's what worked for us. Good luck - I hope you find something that you can both feel good about. It's no fun to cry yourself to sleep. Oh and be sure not to rush the bedtime routine - kids can sense that it makes putting them down harder.

this is completely normal.
He is asserting some control and opinion into his life.

I would con't doing what you are doing.
Try putting both the crib and bed in his room. Give him the choice of where to sleep.

We started at naps, and when she couldn't stay in bed we put her in the crib, it took about a month but she got it.. she was 25 months old when we transfered her.

Look back over the past two months and think if anything has changed in your routine or your lives that might have been a little difficult for him. You said that he put himself to sleep for a long time. Is he teething? Has something in the room changed? Is anything different in your family? If yes to any of these, he might need some comfort around that particular issue. If nothing has changed, continue giving hime lots of comfort and love like you always have. Then, at bedtime, read him a story or whatever relaxing bedtime routine you normally do. Tell him firmly but lovingly it's time to go to sleep, and leave the room. If he has gotten used to you coming back in after he cries for 10 minutes--guess what? he will cry for 10 minutes. So, don't wait for 10 minutes. Go in once only after he cries for five, pat him on the back and tell him to go to sleep again. Do NOT pick him up or take him out of the crib. Then leave the room. He may cry for 20 minutes, but he will go to sleep. It is VERY important that you don't go back in the room now--even if he cries for an hour the first night you try this. The next night, wait until he cries for 10 minutes, go in, pat his back and leave (tell him you love him, do NOT pick him up). And then leave and let him cry himself to sleep. The crying should lessen each night. After about the 4th or 5th night, stop going in at all, after you put him down. You are breaking a pattern, and it's h*** o* a parent to hear their child cry, but you need to break the cycle and it really is better for him to relearn to put himself to sleep. It will work, if you stick with it. I have done it, and I know other moms who have, as well. Hang in there.

Hi K.. I have a 2 year old girl and 4 year old boy. They have both been in a twin bed since they turned 1. Every night I let them each choose one book to read, and we read it in their bed. Most times they fall right to sleep after, but sometimes they are up like yo-yo's. Just keep putting them in their beds. They are just like us, sometimes it just takes a little longer to unwind at night to fall asleep.

I had the same fears....it sounds as though our sons have the same sleep habits and temperment. We switched to a big boy bed at the beginning of the year. I bought rails to go on the bed and a gate for the doorway and we have never had a problem.. I started by putting the matress next to the crib and gave a choice of the crib or "big boy bed" he would lay on the mattress for awhile then want to go to the crib. That was fine. That lasted about a week. I bought Thomas sheets and comforter for the bed and made a big deal about sleeping in the big boy bed. He had never tried to get out of the bed. I thought for sure he would scream and throw a fit but it was awesome. I don't think he knows he can get out. He calls for me when his nap is done or in the morning. We also bought a small aquarium with a gold fish and use the light of the aquarium for the night light and I put glow in the dark stars on the ceiling so we can count stars when he goes to bed. I lay down with him sometimes but not all (didn't want to start a habit) Good luck to you...

A couple of things to consider before moving your toddler to a regular bed. 1) is he climbing out of his crib? 2) do you need the crib for a baby on the way?

We have a son who is just 3 and he's still in his crib. He sleeps great in there, makes a rare attempt to get out (he can, he just doesn't seem to fee the need to, especially in the dark)and since we don't have another child we need the crib for, we've left him in the crib. We have the toddler conversion piece for it, and we'll probably start using it in a couple of months when he's potty training at night.

My niece, who was a horrible sleeper, had to come out of her crib at 19 months for her own safety (she was flipping herself out of it), but my nephew was much like my son - a champion sleeper who was content for a very long time in his crib.

As with all things, your mileage may vary... but don't feel rushed to get the transition to a bed made unless there is a need for the crib or safety at stake.

only advice...KEEP HIM IN HIS CRIB UNTIL HE STARTS JUMPING OUT. It is so hard to keep them in toddler beds...so if he isn't jumping out of his crib yet, keep it! save yourself a lot of hard work. when you DO decide to swich though, one that thing has worked for many moms (so they say) is taking all the toys out of the room and putting a baby gate up, let them scream at the gate until they get so tired they fall asleep. :( good luck. it could be a faze too..try NOT going in after 10 minutes of crying...he may be doing it because he knows you'll come in. OR, one thing that I know DOES work, if you put him to bed at the same time EVERY nite..put hiim to bed 10 minutes earlier..you'll be ammazed how such a small amount of time makes such a huge difference in their behavior. good luck.

Get him the twin size bed and just keep putting him back in bed

My rule of thumb is if it's working don't mess with it. I considered the same idea of moving my 2 year old to a toddler bed but relized why potentially mess up what is working. She loves her naps and dosn't try to climb out. If you are in need of the crib or just feel it is time I would put the other bed in his room and give him time to adjust to the idea. Some kids don't like the idea of changing. Start reading stories in the new bed and see how he warms up to it.Best wishes and sweet dreams

I have a 2 1/2 year old that I had to move into a bed quite early due to another baby. We go through the nightly routine...brush teeth, read books, and then say prayers. We finally resorted to putting a gate on the door which keeps him in his room and we have a very dim light on which allows him to read quietly by himself after we have tucked him in. Until we bought the gate he would NEVER stay in his room and we tried everything! Sometimes he falls asleep on the floor or in his chair but he stays in his room and he's quiet (and the room is child proof and we check on him frequently). Some moms may disagree with this tactic but I have to do what works...and maybe this will work for you too. Good luck.

I had a problem with my 2 1/2 year old and figured out that she was scared of something that she had never noticed before. I took me a week to figure out what it was. but she started going to bed fine after I fixed the problem. other things that has made it hard for her was she was thirsty or she had to go potty(if he's potty trained).
If your thinking of putting him in a bigger bed and you have the bed give it a trial night and see how he does. If he gets out immideately put him back to bed in the crib and give him a couple more months.

Hey K.:

My two cents:

Instead of going back in and engaging with him. Just go in, sit nearby so he knows you're there. That may provide comfort without stimulation, then he'll doze off....sooner and sooner each time. In a way, engaging him will bring his energy back up and take him further away from sleep.

Hope it helps.

K., mom of 4 yr old Anjeni