Need Advice on Bedwetting

Updated on August 10, 2006
L. asks from Kansas City, MO
24 answers

I have 6 y/o twin boys who both wet the bed, nearly every night. We have made this such a NON-big deal up until now, that they really think this is a normal happening. I have had to gently mention to them that they will probably not want to let thier playmates/cousins know they wet the bed! They are both good and deep sleepers and would be hard to get up to use the bathroom once they are asleep. They were both very easy to potty train, with no set-backs or accident issues. My pediatrician says most boys, who aren't dry at night immediately after potty-training, outgrow it in their 6th year, but they are still doing it. I am thinking it is just something I am going to have to wait out, but if anyone has any ideas that have worked for them, please let me know! Those Goodnights underpants are getting expensive for two! Thanks!

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C.A.

answers from Lawton on

I would really try to let it go for awhile longer. Though restrict drinks right before bedtime. You really don't want to shame them or make them feel bad for something they can't control.

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D.

answers from Kansas City on

Have you had them tested for allergies? I used to babysit a boy who wet the bed regularly and they found out he was allergic to milk, chocolate... when he didn't have them he didn't wet the bed.

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P.D.

answers from Tulsa on

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L.F.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Hi, I hope this is helpful. I had to cut back on drinks for my oldest son. I started not letting him have anything to drink after 8pm (bedtime was at 9pm) but then had to back it up to 7pm before it stopped. Good Luck. I know how expensive those nighttime pullups are. :)

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M.

answers from Bloomington on

Hey L.!

I wish I had great advice- but I just have encouragement that you are not alone! My twin boys are five and we are still buying those pullups for overnight- some nights they even leak out of them! Paying the money and still laundering sheets often. :( Maybe I should try the goodnights brand... Anyhow, I am also trying to wait it out. Best wishes!

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L.M.

answers from Champaign on

L.:

I am a mother of four. I would stop all drinks one hour before bed and have a nice loving talk with them when tucking them in their beds about encouraging words to think about how their bladder may feel when they need to potty. Sometimes their minds hear words immediately and process when needed. Of course the obvious, have them sit on the potty before bed to try to empty their bladder. Children really do like schedule.

I hope this helps,
L.

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A.C.

answers from Oklahoma City on

My daughter was the same way, I finally had to stop letting her have anything but small ( and I mean very small) sips of water after about 6:00pm and then right before I went to bed about 10:30 or 11:00 I would get her up and guide her to the bathroom. I would have to help her because she is a very sound sleeper as well so I had to almost pick her up and carry her or hold her up when she walked to the potty. It finally got to where she dosen't wet the bed at all anymore and I don't have to limit her either. I still make sure she dosen't have much to drink but I don't do like I was and put a small amount in the glass so she could only have one to two swallows. It has helped. I hope it helps you. Good luck!

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B.E.

answers from Tulsa on

Hi L., Well, I never had a problem with potty training, but my daughter has 2 kids and they still wet the bed. Come to find out, their father wet the bed until he was ten years old. I don't know if bedwetting is a genetic thing or not, but its something to consider. Have you tried cutting off the liquids 2 hrs before they go to bed? Do they use the bathroom right before they go to bed? Maybe if they had to help wash the clothes and bedding every time, they would try harder to not wet the bed. Its just a suggestion. B.

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S.

answers from St. Louis on

Bedwetting runs in my family. My son is 8 and recently slowed down. Goodnights are expensive. I used pull ups with my son. you get more for less cost. I thought he'd have a problem with this but he took it well. I let him pick them out. Personally I wet the bed til puberty at age 13. It is embarassing. There are medication options. I had to take them but fortunately my son does not. The Drs. are very cautous about giving this now days. Being that it is nearly every night I don't think it is a "heavy" sleeping issue. And I'm sure your Doctor has told you that it is something the kids can not help. Please don't make them believe that it is because they are sleeping to heavy. My mother did this to me. I used to go to bed thinking that if I didn't fall fully asleep then I'd be able to wake up and go to the bathroom. This caused many sleepless nights. I can trace bedwetting all the way back to my great grandfather hitting every generation. They say that is it genetic. Be patient with them and understanding. It is a disease. Talk to your dr. about DDAVP. It's one of the medications that will help. But this medication has a side effect to make them drousy and sleep heavier so be careful.
Over all when my son was 6 he was still wetting 99% of the time. Now he only wets once in a while and we have done away with the pull ups. Keep your chin up, it will get better. Need to talk about it anymore ( as I know how frustrating it can be) please feel free to email me. ____@____.com
Also I got some advice by searching online and found organizations that can help answer all my questions about it.

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S.H.

answers from Kansas City on

L., We have a son who will turn 8 years old in October. He goes through phases where he will wet the bed for several nights in a row. Then, he will go several days, perhaps even a few months, where he doesn't. Our pediatrician said not to worry until age 10 with boys. He is embarrassed by it and will not sleep over at a friend's house. We are very supportive and he knows it is not his fault...he is just a deep sleeper. I can see each month how much better he is getting. Either his bladder is getting bigger, or he is just outgrowing it. Hang in there!
Sincerely,
S.

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K.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Once I stopped letting my son wear the pull ups at night and letting him wake up wet. It seemed to help.
I got a plastic sheet to protect the bed and used sheets and blankets that could be easily washed. It took about 4 nights before he started to learn to get up and go to the bathroom.
Of course it's not fun doing all that laundry but it was worth it.

Also cutting the liquids about an hour before bedtime really helped too.

I hope you find something that works

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N.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I too would check with another doctor if your doctor says they woudl outgrow it by age 6 cause my step daughter has the same issue and everythign I have read and what my doctor has said is if they will outgrow it it will happen by age 9 not 6. Has your docotr mentioned anythign about a device that is placed in their underware at night that is suppose to wake them up when they get the urge to go. I would discuss it with your doctor cause I too have a child that wears the Good Nights and she is 7 yrs old now and the doctor says if she has not outgrown it when she is 9 yrs she will get the device but I can not think of what it is called. But my step daughter is also one of the really deep sleepers where you have to pretty much drag her to the bathroom place her on the toliet and wipe her butt for her LOL. If you just told her to get up and go she would stand there ana have a conversation with her dresser.
But that is about all I could think to do is discuss it with your doctor some more or get a second opnion from another doctor. Sorry if I am no help.

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L.A.

answers from Kansas City on

A friend of my daughter's still wets the bed and she's 10 1/2. She sleeps so hard, she does not wake up, even with an alarm clock on her pillow. She had her tonsils and adenoids out last summer, and I was sure that would help her problem, but it hasn't, she just has to "grow out of it" She still wears a Pull Up, and I know hesitates to go to sleepovers. I would suggest you have his g tonsils and adenoids checked - he could be a super heavy sleeper if he has problems with them.

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D.H.

answers from Kansas City on

This worked for my best friend, mother of 3 boys. She took them to a chiropractor to get adjusted. They had a few more visits and no more wetting the bed. Can't hurt!! Good Luck!

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B.P.

answers from St. Louis on

I know I responded before but then I read your the other great advice and just wanted to let you know that I to give my girls 21 months and 7 years Juice Plus+ and they love it. It has helped them to crave more fruits and veggies. But contact me and we can talk.

B.

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J.T.

answers from Oklahoma City on

L. what my husband and I did with our daughter to get her to stop wetting the bed is giving her a goal to set for if she didn't wet the bed for so many months she would get her ears peirced but since you have boys you could use like a big toy they want from the store as their goal.

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J.B.

answers from Kansas City on

L., I feel your pain. First off, let me tell that it will get better. I used to have the same problem as your boys when I was young. I remember dreaming about having to use the bathroom but just not being able to fully wake up and would wake up with a wet bed. As I got older it happened less often, until it finally stopped happening all together. My youngest son, who is 5, also has this problem. Here is a list of ideas that we do to help.
1. No liquids after dinner time.
2. Use the bathroom right before bed.
3. Put a water proof mattress cover on the bed.
4. Get them out of bed during the night and use the bathroom.
(I know that you said they are deep sleepers but they don't have to really be awake to use the bathroom. We take our son in and basically hold him up, help him with his clothes and tell him to go potty. Half the time his eyes are still closed but he does go potty and most of the time doesn't even remember.)

Once they get used to getting up to go at the same time every night their bodies will adjust. My son now gets up on his own at the same time every night to use the bathroom. Of course his aim isn't always on target but what boy's is! :)

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J.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi L.. I do not personally know what you are going through, but my husband wet the bed for much of his adolescent life. He went through all the common medical treatments before he finally "just grew out of it". Now, as a chiropractor, he found out about the success chiropractic has had with bedwetting and sees children in the office all the time.
Here is some information on published research about chiropractic and bedwetting:
http://www.icpa4kids.org/research/chiropractic/bedwetting...

another very common problem that goes unnoticed is a dairy allergy. You may try taking the children off dairy and seeing what happens.

We are located in Belleville if you would like to consult with my husband. The office is called Family First Health Center. The number is ###-###-####

L., just know that you are not alone. and there is help available.

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C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

L., I haven't had this problem with my own children, but a child I babysat at night had this problem years ago. He was 5 and was wetting the bed everynight. His mom got the device that alarms them when they are wet and wakes them up. I am sure it was probably about $100, but it worked like a charm. Within a week or so he wasn't wetting his bed, he was waking up when he had to go. I wish the best luck with this. C.

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D.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Hi L.
My oldest son has trouble with wetting the bed also. He is also a very deep sleeper. He is 6 and the wetting has become less frequent. My husband doesn't generally get up until about midnight so he gets him up before he goes to bed. JJ pretty much sleepwalks to the bathroom. we pull his pants down and turn on the water. He goes and we put him back in bed. I know it sounds like a hassle, but it has saved me on laundry. he doesn't even remember it the next day. It has worked for us. good luck. I have 8 month old twin boys.. any adcise u have for me with them would be appreciated.

thanks

D.

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T.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I would have to agree with both responses thus far. Try to set a goal and cutting off liquids after a certian time. My husband has an 8yr old son who still wets the bed. He actually has medication he takes before bedtime. If he doesn't take the meds he wets. I would hope the first two suggestions solve the problem, but if it continues I would consult your pediatrician.

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T.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

L.

Have you thought about getting them checked out by a doctor. If your regular dr. is saying it is something they will grow out of and you are not happy with that, then go to a specialist. If you don't think the boys are doing it for attention then they may have something going on. I have heard talk about small or underdeveloped bladders. They even make meds for kids w/ this problem. I don't think you are a cult of one. Has any thing big happened in there life in the last year or so like a birth, death, move, starting school all of those things can affect a child.

If you cut the fluids off a couple of hrs. before bed and right before you tuck them in make them go and empty their bladder (a lot of kids are in to big of a hurry to go until they are empty) and they still wet the bed I would get them checked out. If you try to offer a reward system for something they can't help I would think you would be setting them up for failure and you frustration.

And also, I could not tell if this is something they have been doing since they where potty trained, or it just started. Because of the heat we are having we are all trying to keep hydrated so they are probably taking in more fluids then normal and their bodies are holding on to all that extra fluid so they are not getting rid of all they are taking in before they are going to sleep. So in the middle of the night they are getting rid of all that stored fluid.

I would get them checked out though because even boys can get UTI from the bath, pool, and not empting thir bladders all the way when they do go.

Good luck. I hope some of that helps.

T.

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A.Y.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi. I am a pediatric chiropractor, and I was wondering if you have had the boys checked out by a chiropractor. Sometimes (not always) there is a biomechanical reason for bedwetting that can be easily managed with gentle adjustments. You can read some of the research at www.icpa4kids.org. The specific link to bedwetting info is: http://www.icpa4kids.org/research/chiropractic/bedwetting...

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to call me at my office at ###-###-####.

Yours in health,
Dr. Alyssa
First Choice Chiropractic
www.first-choice-chiro.com

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T.K.

answers from Champaign on

I have two that have had problems bed wetting. One daughter and one son. I was trying a wonderful new supplement and decided to give a half dose to each of my kids. Within two weeks we noticed marked differences. After a month and a half we have more dry times than wet. I am convinced that this has worked and it is really healthy. We knew we could try it and if it did not work we could get our money back we had nothing to lose. We are really glad we did. But, I am a skeptic so we took the kids off for 2 weeks...we had wet beds all but two nights of the entire two weeks. I am sold! If you want to check it out for a month and try it you can or you can do like I did and signed up to be a member and actually it has turned in to an awesome at home job. My site is www.myvemma.com/heritage you can email for more details. I will also pray for you..above all else that helps.
Tammy

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