Need Advice - Mount Pleasant,SC

Updated on April 23, 2008
A.M. asks from Mount Pleasant, SC
11 answers

I am suffering from this constant dilemma and really need anybody's input on this. My son is going to be 6months in a few days.My husband and myself work almost 80hours per week. But we have some help from my mother-in-law and later on my mother is going to stay with us to help out. I decided to put my child in day care 3 days a week so that he will get some form of interaction and stimulation with other kids and more structure- instead of being stuck in the house all the time.However he goes to the day care for 2 days and comes down with a horrible cold and cough . I keep telling myself thats good-he will develop great immunity and wouldn't have to miss school time etc .But am I kidding myself -should I just keep him at home or should I just send him for 2- 3 days to the day care.Do child who don't go to day care have more colds etc when they start school .Whats the right thing to do here .I am absolutely confused.

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A.W.

answers from Charleston on

I have had the same dilemma with my son when he was younger. My pediatrician says it is better if they can stay at home, especially at such a young age. They stay MUCH healthier. If that is not possible, I would try to put him in an in-home daycare where there are only a few other children. I was worried about him not having enough interaction with other children, but the pediatrician said this is not that important until they are about 3 years old, because younger than that, they usually will play independently anyway.

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N.J.

answers from Savannah on

I have mixed emotions (as I'm sure you do too) If you are able to keep him at home (even with your mother-in-law) I would, but I would try to arrange smaller play-date type of interaction. I thought keeping my daughter home was the best thing for her, until I realized that at almost a year, she was still scooting, not attempting to really crawl, much less walk. I (with my mother-in-law's input) opted for the occasional day-care stay, and I am NOT exagerating, within a month, not only was she crawling, but WALKING wonderfully. I know with larger day-cares (mine was small) that sickness runs amuck, which is why I mentioned smaller group play-dates. I firmly believe it is imperative to develop social-type skills, even at a young age. Sharing is learned very young, often before walking even, and watching others behaving well (in their own age group) creates confidence, a goal, and their own sense of independence.

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K.M.

answers from Sumter on

I would never put a baby of that tender age in day care. There are just too many dieseases in them that can cause him to become seriously ill. At his age his immune system is not fully developed. If you have to put him in day care then at least use a licensed in home care center though I still don't believe in them. I stayed home with my children at first then worked the night shift so that I did not have to put them in day care until I found at home business opportuity that allows me to stay at home with my children.
Good luck to you!
K.
The MOM Team
www.enhanceyourlifeonline.com

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C.T.

answers from Sumter on

I am not going to tell you that your child is too young for daycare because that is unreasonable. I an active duty military (so is hubby) and if I tried to tell my work center that I am not going to work until my child is older because daycare isn't safe they would laugh in my face and I'd probably get into a tad bit of trouble.

I had to put my son into daycare at 3 months. It is common for children in daycare to be sick more often than children who stay at home. The positive to this is when he goes to school and children at school get sick, he more than likely will not because he has already been exposed while in daycare. Infants are cared for by specific standards in daycares required by law. Your child is going to get sick more often simply because there are other children who are exposed to different germs. This is something you are going to have to face sooner or later. I, personally, would rather my child be exposed earlier as not to miss valuable school time later and infants tend to be very resilient.

C.
www.purelybalanced.com

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K.P.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi A.,

I have a 2 year old who has gone to daycare since she was 2 months old. Yes, she gets sick, not as much as when she was your sons age, but sickness gets passed very easily in daycare. I also believe,and as my pediatrician has also stated, that getting colds and viruses as young children has benefits when they become school age.

My daughter has had a set of tubes put in her ears from chronic ear infections, which was the bulk of her illnesses. She didn't catch these from other kids, simply had too much fluid buildup which then turned into infections.

It's your decision to make, but I like sending my daughter to daycare as she gets interaction with other children and enjoys herself. It's a difficult decision to make, but it certainly won't hurt him in the long run to get sick every once in a while. Good Luck!

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B.S.

answers from Atlanta on

My son has been in daycare since he was about 3 months...his doctor prescribed a shot called synagis and it's been great! Another thing you might want to do, use the disinfecting wipes on your door handles and such. I normally take my son from the carseat to his bedroom, his hands and face washed and clothes changed. I really think that has helped too. Children will always get sick, it's normal!! Good luck...B.--

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I.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi A.,
I have a 5 yr old daughter and an 8 month old son. My son is home with me, because I work from home, but I am starting to look into part time child care as well. With my 5 yr old, she didn't go into day care until she was about 3 yrs old and I promise you that she had the same cold for about an entire year. But, she had to be exposed to other kids sooner or later. I think maybe it wouldn't have been as bad if I had not waited until so late. Also, she struggles with acceptance issues and peer interaction. She loves other kids but she is not very confident. For example, if we take her to the park, she is afraid to just jump in and play with other kids, and she sometimes wakes up crying from nightmares about other kids laughing at her or not wanting to be her friend. I wish I would have at least exposed her to play groups or some type of little gymnastics or tumble class or something to let her get exposed to other kids. But being sick is a part of life, and I think older kids end up with more sickness than younger babies because they touch more things to spread the germs more. If you do decide to go with the child care, just make sure that they sterilize the toys and wash hands, etc.

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M.F.

answers from Atlanta on

Well, at 6 months old I can say this with my first child and no other children around he didn't learn as fast as my 3rd child did having to brothers to watch and have interaction with. A child can get sick if at home or in a child care setting. I have a great niece right now has a grandmother babysitting her and she has had her share of little colds. I think the runny nose and grumpy stuff have really been from her teething said it a month ago and she got a tooth and so on. All of my boys have went to a prek program from age 2 at least 2 days a week their hours were 9-1 sometimes my kids got sick sometimes not. My two oldest are 7 & 5 they are in school they don't get sick that much the oldest has missed 5 days of school this year. The 5 yr old has missed 1 day. My youngest age 4 has missed about 4 days (he goes 4 days a week 9-1). Myself I think if a child has interaction it's great and it can be play dates, family get togethers etc. I think when a child can at least be around 18-24 months a few days a week at a day care or church program for a few hours is great I'm not crazy about much younger then that. I have been a sub teacher at my son's little church program and I have watched the baby room they are 6 months to 22 months, they were fun I was with another women we took care of 6 little ones that's the limit there. I can say it was busy we mostly babied them, read a few books, sang, helped them clap their hands, played music, feed them. Honestly, if you have the chance for one on one with one person I'd do that for now and at about 18 months I'd look into a daycare or church program that you like. Now at 2 yrs old I ws a sub teacher in that class as well and there was more learning going on of course on their level but more interaction between the kids learning how to walk in a line, sing, we'd read, play learning games. I think if you wait you'll yes at 2 there's more structure for them but at 6 months not sure what you are looking for but the babies I watched just wanted attention, love, cuddles...I hope this doesn't upset you but I vote for the home care and then around 22-24 a program a few days a week, I can say at least at this point if your child is home they can only get something from a store or outing or another person at home vs. school. If my mothers was alive and well and could watch my babies back then I'd let her I know they would of gotten love, attention and my mother would do as I asked read, sing and play. Sorry my vote is home. Best of luck with what you want to do.

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S.T.

answers from Atlanta on

I agree that this is too early of an age to place in daycare.

If the home option is a good one for you, try having some kids over for small parties or playtimes to get your child used to having children around and to be a bit more in control of the coughs and colds. Cobb Moms have get-togethers all the time and will even send you an evite to activities and events they have scheduled for moms/children. Give them a try and good luck :)

http://www.eastcobbmoms.com/

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M.H.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi A.,

This is a common misconception. Getting sick does not raise the immune system. Especially repeatedly. Health raises it. Not getting sick is not necessarily good health. My kids take care of sick kids in the nurseries at church and never get sick, even kissing on them, not because they are "super-kids" but because I keep them away from things that would brake down their immune systems. Don't feel bad, it took me a looooong time to figure this out and there are still a lot of people that will tell you differently.

We don't eat fast foods or processed ones except when in a bind. I give my girls a good absorbable multivitamin every day. No diet will give them all the nutrition they need. Even the FDA says that the soil is so depleted and the pollution is so bad that we don't have a chance with just food for our nutrition. I have detoxified my house, down to the shampoo they wash their hair with, from all synthetic chemicals so my girls have a fighting chance with their health. Even if you detox at home, remember daycares have multiple, powerful, synthetic chemicals that break down the immune system.

I understand your son is too young to chew a vitamin, :) but starting good habits now will help. If you understand the concept, it is easy to do and it doesn't have to be expensive or time consuming. Whether you put your kids in daycare now or in school later, is your decision. I'll be glad to give you more details on the path I took if you're interested, just let me know.

Regards,

M.

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D.

answers from Charleston on

Hi A., I have 3 children and my first 2 boys went to day care. They were always sick. My oldest is now 7 and in school.He has been sick a couple of times ,but nothing like when he was in daycare.My second son was in daycare up until he was 2,sick all the time then.Now he gets sick if his brother gets sick.Now I have a 1yr old little girl who has never been to day care and has not been sick at all.I'm sure that when she start school she will get sick all the time. I do think that when kids are around sickness it helps develop immunity to what ever is going around.I hope this helps. p.s. I never sent my kids to day care if they were sick ,just so other kids would not get it. Dottie

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