My daughter seems to be experiencing girl drama alot these days. By "drama" I mean very bossy and controlling girls who are also very manipulative. She is a very sweet and fun-loving girl and is very trusting and they seem to trick her, blackmail her and just act mean, Is there a good book out there that would be good for her to read that can help become confident and help her learn how to handle these situations. I dont' feel like I am giving her the right tools or advice. I remember some of this kind of stuff when I was a kid, but they seem so much more mean about it these days, I hate to see her upset. But I also feel that she does not need to tolerate that kind of disrespectful behavior just becuz she is the easy going type. She is not shy and CAN stand up for herself, but for some reason I don't feel she is doing that in these situations. By the way this is mainly occuring in the Home Day Care she goes to. She is 9 there is a 6, 7, another 9 yr old and 13 yr old girls and a 2 yr old boy and 10 yr old boy. Many days they are not all there together. I see books out there but I need one age appropriate. Thanks Mommas! Any words of encouragement would be great too!
I am not interested in moving her! I would like her to learn how to deal with these situations not run from them. All in all she has alot of fun where she is and I have talked to the day care provider and she is aware of it and has taken several measures to discipline the one girl that mainly is doing it. But I see these situations at school church, and on her soccer team. They are nothing major just girls being girls. But I don't teach my daughter nor do I tolerate her treating others that way. I have told her many times to tell the person she does not like how they are treating her or talking to her and to walk away. But that's when the manipulation comes in. So I just wanted her to be able to read about being assertive, confident, and above all to be respectful. Thanks to those of you who actually suggested books which is what I originally had asked for.
I was going to order this American Girl Doll book for my daughter: http://www.amazon.com/Friends-Making-Them-Keeping-America...
Hope that helps!
Friends who are a negative influence are not friends worth keeping. Here are some books about both true and troubled friendships:
Charlotte's Web
The Rag Coat by Lauren Mills
The Hundred Dresses by Eleanor Estes
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm By Kate Wiggin
Lady Lollipop by Dick King Smith
Frog and Toad are Friends by Arnold Lobel
A Bargain for Francis by Russell Hoban
The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein
The Paperbag Princess by Robert Munsch
Mike Mulligan and his Steam Shovel by Virginia Burton
I bought my then 7 yr old daughter (she's 9 now) the American Girl book "Stand up for yourself and your friends" book and we've had to talk about different situations and what to say and do. I've always told her she doesn't have to stay and listen to what someone is saying to her or about her but I don't know if that will help in your situation. Good luck!
Go to the library and ask. They will probably have some ideas. I second the idea of finding a new place for to go all summer. The Y or similar place will have activities and will hopefully be monitored better.
I would speak to whoever is running this daycare. It seems to me that they are not doing their job which you pay them for.
Don't know if this will help but Junie B. Jones seems appropriate. It's a series and it's about a little girl experiencing things in her world and how she sees it. It's very cute with some lessons imbedded in them. This is a tough age for them, good luck and let me know what you think.
E.
tough age. Many young children have a problem reading people and do not see. That home care might not be the best place for her. You have to help her learn to say NO. You role play and her saying NO. And to ask why if someone asks something. I'd get her in outside group activities that you can watch to help her see the cues.
My daughter isn't quite that age yet, but my best friend's daughter is and she swears by the American Girl Books. I think someone may have already suggested this, but I thought I'd put an extra reinforcement in! Good luck!
I know how difficult summer care can be, but I wonder if there is any way to pepper in a different environment. . . maybe a Y program one where she is with kiddos her own age?
sorry, I know that isn't what you asked, but my son (7yo) really does better when he is with kids his own age and I have had to get creative with summer care and not rely on the same place my 4yo goes. . .helped him a lot:)
I just offered this because it seems this is a summer thing by the post and doesn't happen year-round when she is with her pals from school.
Good luck! I agree, though, girls seem much more aggressive these days.
The American Girl Book, Crissa, is great for that age. The girl overcomes bullying at her school. There is also a movie if you want to preview it quickly. Good Luck!
