My So-Called Crazy Idea

Updated on August 27, 2014
S.V. asks from Forest Park, IL
27 answers

Our 8-month-old is not sleeping through the night. We live in an apartment in an old 2-flat with 1 bathroom between the two bedrooms, just a few steps away from the door to our daughter's room. Last night I suggested to my husband that we try peeing in a bucket in our relatively small bedroom to avoid disturbing her. His answer was an immediate and flat-out "no way."

Sure, the room is small, but we keep it cool with a window AC. And even I draw the line at defecation.

If it weren't too late, I would have invented the master bath last night! Has anyone else tried my solution? Would you try it if you had to?

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So What Happened?

To the few who doubted, this was a real question, something I actually considered doing. I went online hoping to find people who would side with me, not my husband. Well that didn’t happen, and we had a good laugh about it.

Thanks to everyone for all of the helpful responses. The most common responses were “use a white noise machine,” “don’t tiptoe around,” “just don’t flush,” and “yuck, gross, don’t.” Many people were incredulous that I would try this, but only one responder wrote that she had ever been in this situation (small living quarters where the baby’s room is right next to a noisy area, in her case, the kitchen).

We already use a white noise machine. Rather than going straight to the bucket, we decided to be a little quieter at night and not flush. But I appreciate the reminders that keeping everything very quiet while the baby sleeps can backfire. My mom always used to say the same. I don’t really think we are raising her in a bubble.

One person commented that the baby shouldn’t be sleeping through the night anyway because “little tummies need food every 3-4 hours.” The baby loves to breastfeed in the middle of the night. According to our pediatrician, and various books, at this age and weight she no longer has a biological need for night feedings. She just loves them for psychological reasons, but she needs to learn to get herself back to sleep if she wakes in the night. I guess I’M the one who wants to sleep through the night!

What happened was, the night before I wrote my question, she awoke in the night, and the sound of her moving around in her crib woke me and my husband. Having been woken up, we wanted to go to the bathroom, but it’s right next to her room. I felt that if we hadn’t had to use the bathroom next to her room, she might have gone back to sleep. Instead, she heard us, cried, and couldn’t get herself back to sleep. I ended up nursing her to sleep, and we were all up for about an hour. The same thing happened the following night. This time, my husband went to the bathroom pretty quietly, and I held it a bit, hoping she would get herself back to sleep. She didn’t.

Anyhow, thanks for the help.

Featured Answers

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Just pee in the toilet but don't flush. My friend's little girls are learning water conservation in girl scouts and their new phrase is "if it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown, flush it down."

5 moms found this helpful
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P.K.

answers from New York on

No way. From the day I brought home all my kids, they got used to noise when they slept. They would sleep thru anything. Was not going to tip toe or pee in a bucket so as not to wake them.

4 moms found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

We have kept a container under the bed for years in case of emergency. I agree, no defacation. It has helped under a lot of circumstances.

More Answers

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Wow - you've re-invented the chamber pot.
Tried your solution? No, never.
Would I if I had to? No, never.
Maybe you can leave off flushing till morning if the toilet is particularly loud when flushed (some are) but peeing in a bucket in order to not wake up the baby wouldn't help and it's a gross idea.
And besides - when kids are REALLY sleeping - they sleep through all kinds of noise and racket.

7 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

If this is a real question (since this is your first, we don't know you) -

a) No. They gave up chamber pots centuries ago. You could always build an outhouse…

b) Put a white noise machine (air filter, fan, etc.) in your child's room to block out household and street noises.

6 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Welcome to mamapedia.

Not only NO. But HECK NO. You aren't living in the 1500's.

Your daughter needs to learn sleep with noise. It's LIFE. The world isn't going to be quiet for her when she sleeps.

If you are **THAT** desperate? go to one of the medical stores and purchase a portable toilet.
http://www.saveritemedical.com/product/bedside-steel-comm...

But really? Just go to the bathroom. If you are waking up EVERY night to go to the bathroom yourself? You might need to go to the doctor and get checked out.

Good luck

5 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from New York on

Life has noise so your daughter should get use to sleeping through normal household stuff. Try putting a white noise machine in her room to help.

5 moms found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Reading on

No way would I do that. Not only is it disgusting, but how is putting your baby in a bubble helping her get used to the sounds in his environment? Don't you want to train her to adjust to and sleep through the sounds in her world? Do you really want to spend the next 18 years tiptoeing?

Eta - normally I check to see if stupid questions come from first timers and I failed in my due diligence this time. Clearly, you are our urine obsessed troll - you've been away for a few months. Getting your jollies this morning?

5 moms found this helpful

F.W.

answers from Danville on

UM...

NO.

Just NO!

eeeeewwwww!!

5 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Ummm, no.

You are trying to be too quiet. Your child needs to get used to noise and lots of it. Being too quiet is not good for her. Every little noise will wake her up so you need to get a sound machine for her room, play music, put a TV, something that will provide noise in her room.

Her little body needs rest.

BUT you do realize most babies do NOT sleep all night for the first year and some don't sleep all night until they are nearly 2, right? You know that right?

The people who get babies that sleep all night are blessed but it's not normal for babies to sleep that many hours in a row.

Their tummies only hold a few ounces of food, their bodies demand food about every 3-4 hours and they'll wake up to eat. It's normal for them to be up during the night.

Do not pee in your bedroom. Also, it's not normal to wake up during the night to go to the bathroom. Most people go before they go to bed then sleep all night waking up and going right away. Our bodies slow down the production of urine when we sleep. If you're waking up to go every night then you might want to talk to the doc about illnesses that effect this.

Something else you might consider. Some people talk about putting their little ones down for the night at 7pm, 7:30pm, even 8pm. Again, that little one isn't designed to sleep 12-14 hours straight. That would be the same as them waking up at 6am and going without food or water until 8pm or 9pm. What would your day be like if you didn't feed your baby all day? They'd cry and scream and be irate. They need to be fed more often.

Our grand kids set their own schedule and almost every one of them still does this today.

They woke up on their own by 7-7:30am. Took a nap after lunch for a couple of hours. Took another short cat nap right before or right after dinner time. They might not be eating with us but they'd be awake. Then they'd all go down for the night around 9pm. No hassles, no tears and screaming. They were ready to go down.

When they were older and eating solids they'd have a snack before bedtime and they would sleep more hours straight.

4 moms found this helpful
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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

I know we all do things for our kids that, before we had kids, we never thought we'd do...but peeing in a bucket? Nah.

4 moms found this helpful
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K.G.

answers from San Diego on

Is this even real? Your not camping! Yuck!!! Baby is gonna have to learn to sleep though the sounds of you tinkelling.

3 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

it's MADDENING when babies go through the no-sleep periods. i'm seriously zombiefied if i don't get enough sleep.
but the answer is not to try and create an airtight soundproofed bubble of a world. babies need to sleep in the world that actually exists, and for most of us that means bathroom noises and vacuum cleaners and birdies singing and voices.
i'm with your husband. peeing in a bucket is going way too far.
hope your baby starts sleeping better soon.
khairete
S.

3 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I would not do that, Ugh.. my bedroom? Plus, the stench you could get, even with a window unit. That is just gross to me.

Tiptoe to your bathroom, pee and don't flush. Get a white noise machine for the baby.

We do that at night anyway so we do not wake each other up during the night. Our master bath is connected to our master bedroom.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Austin on

You need to get your child used to sleeping in noisy situations. At one point, I was vacuuming about 6 feet away from one child..... she didn't even stir!

So.... from now on, when the baby is sleeping, do NOT go around on tip-toes, trying to avoid all noise...... she needs to get used to sleeping through noises...

Also... have you gotten in the habit (bad habit) of going in every time she stirs? She will stir frequently during the night, but go back to sleep if you don't go in. Babies make all sorts of noises, and even half-wake during the night, but will go back to sleep if not disturbed.

Also.... put something in her room like a "white noise generator" ... that can help mask noises from other areas. It can also help soothe her back to sleep.

3 moms found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

I used to work in villages in Alaska and that is known as the "honey pot" there. I would not do it. It stinks. Instead put some white noise in your daughter's room. And then do not flush when you do go to the bathroom. I run a stand up fan in my daughter's room and you cannot hear anything in there! It's perfect because her older brother goes to bed later than she does and if she hears him she wants to get up. It also is nice because she sleeps in later in the morning now that I've been using it.

3 moms found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

Don't go out of you way to make noise or anything, but don't try to eliminate all normal quiet sounds either. If you do, your child will keep waking up to the slightest noise. It is not reasonable to pee in a bucket, but not flushing the toilet until morning might be an option.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.D.

answers from Jacksonville on

Ummmm, no! Pee in the toilet and don't flush, or get her a white noise machine. I'd draw the line at peeling in a bucket too. That's a bit ridiculous!

2 moms found this helpful
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T.M.

answers from Tampa on

This is your first question and you have never answered any questions...

Hmm...is this even a real question???

2 moms found this helpful
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J.O.

answers from Detroit on

You need to make sure it's really loud in there with white noise. Buy the loudest fan you can. I find that in winter, a loud humidifier is best. In summer, a HEPA filter. Baby should not be able to hear you at all if you are simply moving around a bit, walking to bathroom.

Oh, and in the middle of the night I don't flush because I don't want to wake anyone.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Chicago on

Just don't flush and you'll be fine till morning.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

I second the small fan for white noise - will cover minor noises that could wake her. I use this myself as my hubby comes to bed later than I do. And unless you're pooping during the night, just pee and flush in the morning. I do that because flushing is just SO LOUD when you're sleepy.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.G.

answers from Chicago on

Don't be afraid to make noise! This is actually what will help facilitate your child sleeping through the night. When my first was born, a relative told me she used to vacuum in the room when her baby was napping. I thought she was crazy but it turns out there is something to this. Babies learn to tune things out and become better and deeper sleepers because of it. When my I had my first, we lived in a condo where her bedroom was right next to the kitchen, separated by only a pocket door. Since babies go to bed very early, often by 6:30, we would wait to eat until after she was down. We'd be cooking in the kitchen right next to her, making the same average noise we'd always made. She quickly got used to it and now at age 8 is a great sleeper, even more soundly than her 5 year old sister who did not have the benefit of this arrangement as a baby.

Long story short, live your life like a normal person. Your baby will adjust and actually be better off for it. And please don't pee in a bucket. It is grossly unsanitary and highly uncivilized!

1 mom found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

No way.

I have nothing against peeing in buckets if I need to, but this is not the solution, and you won't wake a sleeping kid by walking to the bathroom, anyway. It's just not the solution to your problem.

And as Gamma G. says, it's not good to be "too quiet." Then the kid learns to wake up easily.

There are sleep books, cry it out, etc. Others can suggest.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Chicago on

Your child will eventually have to learn to sleep through various natural noises. Honestly, peeing in a bucket to avoid going to the bathroom near her room sounds over the top. Just don't flush unless you have too.

N.N.

answers from Detroit on

You gave me a good laugh at work, the things we will do for our children!

Good Luck mama!

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M.H.

answers from Chicago on

Men pee loudly. Ask your husband to sit and not flush.

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