My Kid Stays at Home and Watches TV All Day, What Should I Do?

Updated on December 17, 2010
A.S. asks from New York, NY
40 answers

My kid is 5 years old. he likes animation very much, but I am worried about that he is weltering in it. I know that animation is good for kids, and just like adults, we like watching football match or Tele drama, but he watches animation all day and does nothing. When I don’t allow him to watch, he will cry heavily or make troubles. he gives me headache I really don’t know what to do. Do you have some good idea to control it?

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answers from St. Louis on

Tell her no. Let her throw a fit, in her room where you dont have to hear it. She can come out when she wants to be normal. Give her projects to do, let her make things, color, clean her room, take her somewhere. Kids get bored easily, so dont expect her to just play nicely by herself all day. Playdates, moms day out, preschool, swimming lessons.....She needs something to do.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Johnstown on

Just unplug the TV and tell her "too bad". Let her cry all she wants. As soon as you give in to the fit, SHE'S won the battle. Remember who the parent is & who the child is and feel free to remind her that YOU are the parent, NOT her.

2 moms found this helpful

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answers from New York on

This is the perfect time of the year to get in the kitchen and bake christmas cookies, make holiday cards, or gifts ... Cut paper snowflakes to hang around the house, use glue and GLITTER! Cut Christmas trees out of construction paper, and paint pasta to glue on to decorate the trees...that is what I came up with in about 30 seconds. Google the internet for easy and fun craft ideas.

Turn off the TV. Unplug it from the wall. Throw it out the window.

9 moms found this helpful


answers from Fort Wayne on

Really? You don't know how to control it? TURN OFF THE TV. So what if she cries, she 5! Mamma, you are letting her rule the roost. Put your foot down. Let her cry and scream and "cause troubles." She'll get over it when she realizes you're not backing down. TV is junk food for the brain. A little is ok, but not all day every day. If she's parked in front of the tv, she's not learning how to interact with other kids. She's not getting exercise.
When she throws a fit, put her in her room. Tell her when she's able to act like a big girl, she can come back out!
Why is she not in school? At 5 she should be in pre-school at the very least. If she's not, then you need to plan some school type activities to keep her mind occupied. Plan some play time. Go outside! MOVE! Move with her! Go kick a ball, throw a ball, run, play tag, anything! JUST MOVE! Read her books, play games, play WITH her!
If she has other fun things to keep her occupied, she won't be thinking about TV. Yes, she'll throw fits for a bit, but she'll get over it. If you let her rule the roost at the age of 5, her teen years are going to be a nightmare.

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Atlanta on

Are you home with her? Who is allowing her to watch tv all day? It's pretty simple -turn the tv off and redirect her to some type of activity. Go to a local park and play or get out the play doh, paper, scissors, glue and markers. Does she have toys? Tell her to play with them. Tell her you're making a new house rule that she can only watch tv for one hour per day. It's NOT good for her! Please do not think that just because something is animated, that it's okay for kids or good for them. "Family Guy," "The Cleveland Show," "South Park," "The Simpsons," "American Dad," and many, many more animated programs are for ADULTS -and very adult-oriented in their themes and language.My boys do watch cartoons, but it's limited. Whoever is taking care of her needs to have the television off for 99% of the day. She needs to be using her imagination and playing.

Also -she's 5. Did she turn 5 after the cut-off date for kindergarten? It would be really good for her to be at a preschool, even if it's only a couple of 1/2 days per week. There are many churches that have Mom's Morning Out programs like that. If you're home with her or if you have a caregiver staying at home with her, you can google classes like Gymboree, Kindermusik, The Music Class, etc. in your area where she could go once or twice a week. Local YMCA's often have great workout facilities for a very low cost. They usually have wonderful childcare centers for your kids while you work out, and many also have indoor pools where you can swim with your child and classes you can take with your child. Look for local indoor play areas as well. Many places have "bouncy houses/slides" for kids, and they'll also have some games and other toys. Usually in a big space with lots of room to run around -a place like that would be ideal for her. What about local children's museums? Those places contain hours of hands-on activities for young children.

I also notice you live in New York, NY. I know you may not be right in the city, but if you are -you have a WEALTH of museums and opportunities. Take her on regular outings to art museums (MOMA, Guggenheim, etc.) and to the Museum of Natural History. I'm sure there's probably a children's puppet theater in New York. We have the Center for Puppetry Arts in Atlanta, and they don't exclusively deal with children's programming, but they do a lot of kid shows. You may find a magazine for free at grocery stores and children's areas especially geared toward activities in your area for kids (we have several -one is called Atlanta Parent). Get one of those and find some things you two can do. Often people don't realize just how many free things there are out there.

If she is staying with a caregiver/nanny during the day, make sure that person KNOWS the new television rule! Make it a condition of their job! I would fire someone in a heartbeat who let my kid watch television all day.

Go to the local library! Find out all of their children's programming. They usually have story hours, etc. Plus, she can look at all the books she wants, go on the children's computers and play games at and check out a few to bring home with her. Large bookstores like Barnes and Noble and Borders also have story hours throughout the week.

Take her to the zoo! If you can afford it, buy a membership and take her there once a week. She'll be fascinated at how the animals change and zoos offer tons of kid's classes and programs for kids. The same goes for local Botanical Gardens and any aquariums near you.

Bottom line -turn that television OFF! She'll get used to it -especially if she's engaged in something else fun. You may have to listen to some whining or crying for a little while, but don't we all? If she persists, simply tell her she will get 1 hour per day to watch cartoons, but if she keeps on crying and whining about it, you're also going to take that away and there will be NO tv at all. That always stops my 4.5 year old pretty quickly whenever he whines for more tv time! You'll just have to weather a period of adjustment.

Good luck! I always tell my boys that a little tv is fun and fine, but watching too much makes you slow and stupid, because it does. You are allowing her to make the rules at your house, and that's your job -not hers. I'm sure, like the rest of us, you have a lot to do and there are plenty of days you just don't want to deal with her, but when we become parents -we have to suck it up and realize that most of our time isn't ours anymore.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Kansas City on

1. be the mom - turn it off.
2. get over the fact that she's crying.
3. do something fun TOGETHER - play a game, throw a ball, read a book, cook, even do household chores together, making them fun.
4. repeat as necessary.

the timer idea is a good one, and you can also make it even simpler - you can watch one show, then find something else to do. very simple.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Houston on

Ummmm, be the parent and put your foot down? Take the TV out of the house. So, she cries and you get a headache. You will both get over it. My kids hardly ever get a chance to watch TV because I keep them so busy. So, get her busy. Play outside, put her in an activity like dance or gymnastics, do a craft project together, go for bike rides. Otherwise, you will end up with a couch potato as a daughter and you will have nobody to blame but you. Sorry, but, you got to be the grown up with this one.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Philadelphia on

you are the adult. tough if she doesnt like it. you make the rules eventually she will come around.
get some cool crafts for her to do.
get her outside if you have parks close by.
get together with friends.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

does she go to school? does she have friends? siblings? etc.
she's addicted to TV now. so you have to 'unhook' her. how? introduce her to pretend playing. get her some kids' kitchen stuff, bowls, wooden spoons etc. sit with her, get some of her dollies around and have a tea party (with cookies and all the fanfare). she will get into it eventually. but she needs to be taught and shown how to play. get her into drawing. long long time ago i told and showed my kids how feelings and imagination is expressed through drawings (i have papers and papers and papers taped all over my room) by their drawings and i make a huge deal out of everything just to show them how exciting and awesome it is.
get her some playdates at your house (your place is the key to this because by playing with other kids she will learn how to incorporate her toys into her daily life).
read read read a lot to her. after finishing reading a book, close it, and talk to her about it.
board games.
go on outings.
i mean the possibilities are numerous. i am not going to scold you for allowing your child to watch tv all day, i am offering you ways how to get her away from it. animation is moderation is good for 'quiet' time, time when you need it to do household chores. animation is not good for anything else. they're not using their physical abilities, their brain, mind, imagination, or anything of the sort while watching tv.
good luck

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Denver on

And what are you doing while she's on her butt watching TV? Same thing?

If *you* aren't willing to get up, move around, get bored by staying in the house all day and start exploring your amazing city, why would she?

Cowgirl up, cupcake and throw out the TV.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

Turn the TV off and DO SOMETHING with her! She needs your guidance and you need to show her how to have fun. This is your problem, not hers. If it's such a big deal that you can't just turn the TV off, get rid of it. Nobody NEEDS TV.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Oklahoma City on

give her a schedule, and tell her the tv will be off at say 10 am for the rest of the day, if she's used to watching it all day, yeah she's gonna throw a fit at first, if she screams and you give in then SHE is setting the rules, not you

if she turns it on behind your back, set it up high (like top of entertainment center, and unplug and put the cord on top too...where she can't reach, and guess what, remote wont work either)

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Pittsburgh on

Turn it OFF! She can earn 30 minutes of viewing by doing 2 hours of other activities.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Charlotte on

All day long? You don't do anything with her outside of the house?? What about activities? Is she in no outside activities? Pre school? Do you ever take her to the park? She needs some form of exercise. Do you belong to a health club? If so, does it provide a daycare? You need to get her involved in some sort of activity outside of the house. Of course she cries heavily when you say no tv - it's all she knows.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Seattle on

Electronics make life easy. You need an hour of peace? Boom. Gotcha. Peace accomplished. Live in a small apartment? In an area with crappy weather? Hurt? Sick? The TV can be a window into a world that isn't 500' feet, pouring rain, slick with mud, or would cost $60 per person to see in person.

That said... my son has obsessed from time to time as well (with either TV, Video Games, Computer... name an "entertainment" or educational tool that plugs in and he's obsessed at least once, and typically at least once a year.

Rule in my house is that whatever it is has to be INSTANTLY turned off AND with good attitude IMMEDIATELY (I'm fair, I'll give warnings if it has to stay off, and I won't do it in an exciting part) whether it's just pausing it to help with something or answer a Q, or whether it's being shut off for awhile. If it ISN'T instantly popped off... it goes away. For 36 ish hours. ALL of the rest of that day AND all of the next day.

If a fit is continued to be thrown, or he sneaks any... the electronics ban gets pushed to a week. After 1 week it's 2 weeks. And after 2 weeks it's a month. ((We haven't gone past a 1 month ban, at least not yet.))

In my experience the troubles and sniffles last a day or two. And then their imagination turns back on and they find other things to do.

I ALSO periodically enforce electronics bans when I'm noticing that his "go to" thing is the computer/tv/videogames. "Kiddo... you're pushing close to an electronics ban... go get your imagination working again" at this point is all it takes to get him thinking about something else.

Most families I know have time limits. We've tried that off and on, and basically for us they just don't work. Instead of it being a "limit", it becomes a "must fill". So we just play it by ear. These days we go days without plugging in or are plugged in for several hours a day. It really depends on what else is going on.

Yes... when they're being brats about it, it becomes a MAJOR pain to unplug them. But if you give in to them throwing fits all they learn is that all they have to do to have it back is to throw a fit / make life annoying for mom. When my son gets banned, he'll often find himself semi grounded to his room as well for several hours. He lost the TV/etc for one set of behaviors... throwing fits / causing trouble then lands him in his room until he can calm down and be decent again.

So if she's giving you a headache... take some ibuprofen, send her to her room to calm down, and read a book.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

It's as simple as turning the tv off. You may have some long days as she adjusts to this new rule, but like so many changes, she'll get over it. She cries because it works. She cries and you give in. Once she learns hat you won't give in, the crying will stop. It will take her a bit to learn that you are serious this time. Have other ideas or activities for her, so she can get excited over that idea rather than distressed over no tv. My son is 5 and my daughter is 2. They are generally allowed 2 cartoons in the morning, total - not each. We color, take walks,go to parks, run errands, build, read, cook. We have a museum membership, so we do there. Sometimes it's as simple as reminding them of a toy they haven't played with in a while. Some of the local art museums around here are free, so we check those out too...even if for just a little while. There are so many wonderful opportunities around us. Do a google search for free or cheap kid entertainment and you will be shocked at how much is available to you. Another suggestion would be to lead by example. Limit your time in front of the tv as well, if you don't already. We don't have cable and we haven't in years...we don't miss it.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

Mine rarely watched anything but educational shows there are so many that teach early reading and math skills, Sesame Street, Word World, Word Girl, are great espciall when your child is to sick to play. But the best thing for your child would be LESS TV
whoever is caring for your child needs to unplug the TV
Most of our children would watch too much tv if we allowed it to become a habit but if you research it on the computer you will see it is not good for kids and does not help their developing language, imagination, and learning so most educated moms who want their children to do well in school socially and academically allow very little tv. Talk to your babysitter about a NO tv during the day rule,

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on


Turn the TV OFF! At 5 years old - a child should not have more than 1 hour of TV per day.

She misbehaves because $10 bucks says she KNOWS you will cave and turn the TV back on.

Get her into reading books and doing other things with her. Give her attention - play with her, interact with her. Keep her away from the TV. Make her "earn" it.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Austin on

You could always put a timer on the power source of the TV so that it will not turn on except at certain times of the day..

Do NOT tell your child about it.Place it on there when she is asleep. Just say, looks like it is not working right now. Or you can only watch TV at ... and give certain times..

Play music during the day.. Have her sing and dance..
If your child is not in school yet, you need to make sure she practices writing her letters and her numbers.

Make sure your child has activities to do on their own.. Puzzles, blocks, cars, dolls, whatever.. Also have a time of day for your child to "read" books or you read to her..
Go to the library once or twice a week. Make sure she goes to story time, so she can get used to sitting and listening.. Remind her to raise her hand before speaking.

She needs to have active time.. playing outside running, jumping, skipping, walking backwards climbing, throwing the ball.. She needs this in the morning and again in the afternoon. at LEAST 1 hour each time..

She can help fold clothes.. This is a good time of year for the 2 of you to bake together. let her pour the flour and the sugar following the recipe.. You guide her.

She can build tents in the living room with sheets and blankets.. Dress up..

When you tell her to go and play, you may want to make sure for a little while you play with her too. Play board games so she will learn to take turns. Let her win sometimes and tell her "good job. If she does not win, show her how to be a gracious loser.

Do not allow the TV to be a baby sitter. Kids that watch a lot of TV, do not always know how to entertain themselves. As a family turn off the TV, play cards, play board games, go for walks and play I spy.. Go on road trips and check out new places, museums, galleries. Make sure you all are reading to her every day.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

All day? are you serious - and what is weltering?
you have had a lot of responses, but really, she is not going to combust if she cries heavily all day. say we are going to the park, or play with her.
my son would play video games ALLLLL day if I let him, I limit him to 1 hour in the week and 2 hours on the weekend, and that is all. one day a month is whatever he wants day, where he gets to do... whatever he wants, usually play video games all day lol.
give her a timer, set it for an hour, tell her when it beeps it goes off, and she can play - at 5 she can play mostly by herself - but I try to play with both my kids ( 8 and 2) individually for an hour each day

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

Yes, try being the mom and just say no and turn off the tv. I don't care what she does or how hard she cries. You are the mom, she is the child. Personally if she pitched a fit, I would outlaw tv completely for at least a week or two as a consequence. Then let her earn it back. Tv time is fine in moderation, but all day long and throwing tantrums to get your way is not okay.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Wichita on

turn the tv off, that's what I do

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Johnson City on

Children will watch tv all day if they arn't given rules. Play with him, read to him, do other activites. If I'm sick yes it's a nice pass time, but all day every day......not so much.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Providence on

therapy? No, just get your kid away from the screen!! Give him a toy, a board game... one of those ancient "books"
lol just try to get him away from it, this sounds b-a-d bad
Give him other stuff in life, at least impose limits on TV time ***but don't get TOO overprotective***

thats my input, signing off
~~~M. K~~~

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

I am going to add a different take on this. When I grew up we first had tv. So of course I am showing my age. I loved watching tv and did so all the time I could. It inspired me to be in shows, sing, play piano, dance and thoroughly enjoy the rest of my school years. Whe I was in Highschool I was in a lot of plays-leads, and I was inspired all of the time by my television watching. My children watched a lot of tv. They did a lot of things in school (He is after all only 5). And then my younger son went on to sing, dance and participated in chorus, handchimes, school plays (Music Man, Highschool Musical, etc.) Sometimes I say now, years later after I listened to all sorts of advice, if it ain't broke don't fix it. But I am older, so I had to go through this. Your child is only five. He will not be spending a lot of time watching t.v. at all in the next couple of years. Perhaps this is really not a problem that everyone is making it.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Modesto on

Unplug the tv and tell her it's BROKEN. Redirect with some games, dolls, coloring books, go for walks, interact with her and play with her. It sounds like she needs to be socialized for awhile until she loses some of the interest the tv has to offer. You do want her to become a little more well rounded. Play with her Mom. Bored kids LOVE tv and can get addicted to it. I don't feel there is anything wrong with TV in proper portions, they can learn a lot from some of the shows- but it definitely should not be her only source of entertainment. I see you live in New York, I'm sure there is plenty of live action going on that would leave animation in the dust, explore WITH her! You have to teach them things, it doesnt just happen naturally. Have her help you in the kitchen (make it fun), maybe you can find a new passion for her if you start exploring WITH her.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

Hi- shes five and your letting her rule the house?: Tell her no more tv! Give her a time limit to watch one show per day of 30min. The rest needs to be spent playing, reading books, coloring, eating her meals etc.The next time she has attitude about turning it off, take the tv away. Don't let her watch any until she is respectful and obedient again. Take care,


1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Set a time frame he can watch tv in - an hour or two a day. Other than that, the TV is off. He can cry and give you troubles all he wants, but he will not get to watch the tv.

Read to him, play play dough, games, tell stories, talk, do make believe (pretend) play. Let him help you cook or help with other simple chores. And read, read, read.... The more he reads, the better he will do in school - even if he can't "read" yet, have him tell you what is happening in the pictures.

It will be harder and more work for you, but it is better for him. TV all day is NOT good for him and will end up hurting him in school later on.



answers from Redding on

Your daughter is 5. She would sit in front of the television eating chocolate donuts every day if she could.
Any kid will try crying and acting up in order to wear their parents down so they can get what they want. The trick is the parents not giving in so that the child knows the fits won't get them anywhere.
Only give her X amount of TV time per day and don't allow the TV on until she does what she's supposed to do. No TV until she's had breakfast, gotten dressed, combed her hair, brushed her teeth and had some activity time coloring or doing puzzles, etc. Then, no evening TV until after she's finished dinner and bathed, brushed her teeth, picked up her room. If she doesn't like having a little TV, then there can always be none and she's old enough to understand that.
You just have to be tougher and more consistant than she is. Get some earplugs and send her to her room if she wants to cry.
It doesn't matter if she doesn't like it.
She'll live.



answers from Rochester on

ANY TV for a length of time is no good.
Animation? do you mean movies? or Anime? Japanese Animation?
Anime is usually not geared towards children at fact more toward adults with adult themes.
If she is crying/making trouble when she is unable to watch, it sounds a lot like addiction. Anime IS addicting (no matter what people who like it say!)
Controlling it? TV needs to 'break' and go to the 'fixit shop'. Out of the house or at least the garage.
Get her out of the house yourself and make playdates or get to the library. You *shouldn't* have to do this but you *need* to.

Get your child out of the habit if you can. You may need help from another corner, like therapy - OT, PT, psych, whatever it takes. This can hang on for a long time if you let it.

Good luck, and God Bless, you'll need it.



answers from Jamestown on

Turn the TV off, walk away, and ignore the tantrums.

On my nights off we have designated times for my 4 year old to watch TV during the day after Pre-K...2:30-3:30pm she watched Nick Jr, 3:30pm she has a choice of watching a movie or reading books, and 8:30pm-9:30pm Nick Jr.



answers from Dallas on

My oldest son (now 17) was like this when he was a toddler. He only wanted to watch Cartoon Network and watch it all the time. Any time I didn't allow him, I got the huge fits. It was his personality (and what a feisty one he had). I cancelled cable and we no longer had the option. I stopped having to be the police and it worked just fine. When I have things in my home that my boys are "addicted" to, I get rid of it. That is my choice, because I prefer to not battle. If you would rather have him cry heavily when you limit his time so you can still have your TV, that's fine too. It is what you are willing to deal with and what is a good trade off for you. I couldn't take the huge battles daily and I could have cared less that we had cable, which is why I cancelled it. Not every child gets addicted to TV, video games, etc., but I found it a lot easier to just not have available whatever my kids seemed addicted to.



answers from New York on

You will have to turn the tv off or at least severely limit it. It is harder in the winter. When you start the new rules expect a protest. Ignore it and plan to entertain her with some activities, especially the first few days. Try and get out a little bit every day. I let mine run around after school at the park (even if it is too cold for more than 10 minutes). My son is almost 5 and is very high energy. We got a mini trampoline for him when he was 2 and he still loves it. It is worth having it in the way in the winter.



answers from New York on

A., she is five and you are the parent. Animation isn't good for kids. An hour of tv a day may not be harmful but there isn't any benefit. Parents set rules and limits. They allow their kids a reasonable amount of television and then shut it off. At five, why is she at home all day and not in preschool or kindergarten? I would get rid of the tv. Unplug it, put it away and just have one in your bedroom for adult viewing. If she has a tantrum or misbehaves because you do not allow tv, then punish her for behaving badly. Most parents do not allow their children to control the household or watch tv all day. Simply turn it off, unplug it. She is watching all day because you are allowing it. Take control as a parent, because this is bad for her. If you have no control over her and her habits and behavior now, you are in for a heck of a time when she is 15 like my daughter is. I really find it hard to believe that you need to ask what to do in this situation.




answers from New York on

Go outside. Engage her in activities inside with you. Take her places.



answers from Phoenix on

Set him down and tell him when he can watch TV. Maybe 1 show a day and unlimited on Sunday or whatever. Otherwise, he needs to play. If he throws a fit, then he can't watch any TV for 5 days. He'll get the hang of it. =) My son is the exact same way with Playstation. He's addicted and we have to limit him big time. He'll throw a fit and then get grounded. He's currently grounded for the whole month. He's careful about throwing fits now. ;)


answers from Norfolk on

Age appropriate shows might be helpful/educational in small doses, but I wouldn't go so far as to say animation is good for kids. I can think of several animated shows I don't think are good for anyone much less a child. Too much of anything, even a good thing, is still not good for you. Get in the habit of reading to/with her. There's no reason you can't have story time several times a day. And trips to the library are fun. The togetherness, cuddling and going through stories/looking at pictures and words together is very good for kids. Then have her draw a picture about the story. At 5, she might be ready for kindergarten (has she/is she going to pre-school?) If tv is a big problem, you can always lock it up with plug locks.


answers from Denver on

A, I almost had that problem with my child however, I went out and bought games, outdoor activities games, balls, hula hoops, bats, skates, double dutch ropes, football, badmintin, volleyball and soccer ball set, you name it we got it! It keep her occupied outside of the house during spring n summer months. Now of course you might think well with fall n winter months they'll be cooped in the house you are right but you have plenty of board games, video games, books, computer games, card games, hockey basketball giddiups you can purchase to get him up off the couch and off from in front of the tv. You have to set the limit on what you want your child to do and for how long. I was amazed when I got all that stuff and the kids didn't know how to play with them. It gave me something to do...teach them how! Good luck!!



answers from New York on

My daughter is 5 too and will sometimes beg to watch tv, but if I suggest some better things for her to do it will usually get her to do something else.
I have activity books for her, coloring books, dress up clothes, a tag reading system etc. If I stop what I am doing for a little while and play with her for a half an hour or so I can usually give her ideas for some fun games of pretend. She will usually then continue the game by herself after I go back to my work.
If you just turn off the tv and stand firm that it will not be turned on then kids will eventually find better things to do on their own, and using their own imagination.
Best of luck



answers from Binghamton on

Put the TV in the basement. Of course she will cry and be troublesome. But it is your job as a mom to set the rules.: NO more TV. In a few weeks you can see if she can win back half and hour a day, but no more.

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