My Daughter Won't Go to Sleep!!

Updated on March 12, 2009
P.C. asks from Hopewell Junction, NY
4 answers

My 14 month old daughter has suddenly decided that she does not want to go to sleep at night. Our routine is ruined. She knows as soon as the lights go low and Mommy gives her the bottle, that it is bedtime and now she starts screaming and carrying on like crazy. She hits, kicks and throws herself all over in her crib. I know she is ttething too, but she has cut many teeth including her top molars and she never acted like this. The time change on sunday seemed to be the clincher!!
Last night I just let her cry and my husband came downstairs yelling that he had to get to sleep for work the next day. He interfered and he took her with him and she stopped crying immediately because she got her way. I need him to be on the same page with me on this. I think if I am persistent with "some sort of bedtime rules", I can get her out of this tatrum pretty quickly.
Any suggestions are very much appreciated!!
Thanks

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thanks Lola, Alyssa, Hanna and Diane,
I really appreciated all your input. There is an issue at home that my husband keeps very long hours and doesn't get home until close to 8 PM. And seeing that Daddy only sees his baby girl sleeping in the morning when he leaves for work, Our daughter was always up later than I would like her to be so that Daddy could spend time with her.
The very next night after our "Incident", I had to put my foot down and tell Daddy that our daughter would be in bed by 8:30PM. She didn't necessarily have to be "asleep", but it was bedtime and there would not be any TV or vidoes etc on. I stuck to my word and Dianna was in bed at 8:30 sharp. She rolled around for only a short time and she fell right off to sleep by 9 PM. She slept 12 hours!!! Last night, she didn't go off to sleep quite as quickly, but she was in bed at 8:30 again. She fussed quite a bit, but only a few times she gave out a little cry. She had pooped, so I did take her out to change her, but it was right back in her crib after that. I put her lullaby music on that I always put on at nap time and before I knew it, it was very quiet in her room and she was fast asleep by 9:30. She slept until 8 AM today. Tonight she fell asleep at 7:45 PM. No fussing at all. She just went right out. I think things are working well.
I do have some crib toys for her when she is not so willing to go to sleep right away, but they are a cloth book, a Cuddle Cub, and her Lullabye Glo-worm. That is all she is allowed. I agree that as long as there is as little stimulation as possible, if she wants to stay up a little it is ok...as long as she stays in her crib and lights are very low. My husband and I talked and although we both understand each other, we still have our own opinions...but my husband has always left the decisions up to me in the past. And he can see that my decision was correct this time too.
I know he misses seeing her at night, but she can't be up all hours of the night just so that he can see her. She is a baby and needs her rest and a routine. Thank you to all of you for your help and support!

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.B.

answers from New York on

My daughter (20 months) won't sleep at night either. It takes her 1 - 2 hours every night! There are 2 things I do.... Number one) If she is crying or yelling, I will go to her and ask what's wrong, rub her head, tell her to sleep.... basically do what it takes to calm her, but do not take her out of the crib. Once she is in bed, she is there to stay. No matter what. I always tell her nicely but firmly to go to sleep. Of course, this can last for hours, so I only do it if she is really crying. If she is just awake, I leave her alone.

Number 2) To keep her happy while she is alone.... She has a teddy bear and blanket that she LOVES. She talks to her bear forever. She also has an aquarium soother, so she presses the button and plays the music. This allows her to be awake for the 2 hours without driving us crazy and preventing us from sleeping.

i was worried about allowing her to be up for so long, but all the advice i got is that as long as she is happy, what's the difference?

So, maybe get her some approriate crib things to keep her happy. If she is going to be awake anyway, it might as well not make you or her unhappy. But whether you get her toys or not, I still suggest that as much as you go in her room to calm her, do not take her out of the crib. She needs to get the message that once it's bed time... there is no other option.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.N.

answers from New York on

just a few tips
get rid of the bottle. give her milk with dinner. not afterwards
earplugs...for HUBBY. very important you two are on the same page or this will not work and you'll find yourself with a 3 year old calling the shots :)

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.S.

answers from New York on

Hey P.,

The time change usually does effect us all for a few days until we adjust. Maybe move the bedtime a little later for a few nights and then slowly back until you get to where you want it to be. An hour is a big difference and can really effect some kids. I agree with you 100% what your husband did (although I do understand some people cant listen to their children cry) will only send the message that if I carry on like this someone will come and get me. You never want to give into a tantrum. For the moment it is a quick fix but in the long run you are only reinforcing negative behavior. At my nursery school we are having trouble getting our toddlers down for their nap because of the time change so I would give her a few days to adjust. I would suggest you and your hubby make a plan on how you are going to handle certain situations. It is okay to disagree, but you should both compromise and like you said be on the same page. Consistency is so important to children they thrive on it and need it. I am sure you will work it out. Good luck!!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.G.

answers from New York on

You're completely right. You and your husband need to be on the same page! The time change is a chaos-inducer, and this age brings lots of fun new tantrums. My son definitely has started some bedtime antics, now that he's 14 months.

But stay consistent, and let your daughter work it out! Your instincts are spot on, but your husband is not helping here...

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches