My Daughter's Buddy

Hi D., my heart goes out to you and your family. Your daughter is going to figure things out. She is going to ask you questions in her own little mubbles. She is already asking for Daisy, she will continue to do so. For some time after Daisy comes home, I would allow a seperate area/room for Daisy to heal.Daisy is going to be sore, and not playful. Your daughter wont understand not to chase her,play with her,pick her up, ect....I on the other hand would contact the pizza place, and explain everything. Why not do a fundraiser to help you pay for Daisy recovery. The pizza delivery guy should know what happen, so he can be more aware of his surroundings. This happened in a neighborhood where children(Small ones) play, and he needs to look around him before he drives all over the place.If worst comes to worst, just explain to your daughter that Daisy's body stopped working and couldnt be fixed. Death happens to all living things-flowers,frogs,fishdogs,cats,and people.Make sure you tell her it is not her fault. I know she is only 13 months old, but she can understand to a point.

I'll keep Daisy and your family in my prayers. I know it can be hard trying to explain the absence of a furry friend.

Hi there!

I'm sorry I can't help with information on the animal rights aspect of things. However, I went through a drawn-out illness with one of my cats with my 2-year-old daughter, and after almost 6 months of us trekking back and forth to the vet's, leaving him there for a week at a time, and having him sequestered frequently so I could monitor his food intake and urinary/feces output, he got sick enough that it was time to let him go.

What I did with my daughter was to be upfront without going into detail. When my daughter asked me, "Where's Linus?" I would reply where he was if he was at the vet's or sequestered in my master bathroom. I just would say that he was sick and the animal doctor was trying to make him feel better.

When we had to take him for his final visit, I was extremely torn apart - this cat had been my baby (and still was to an extent) until I had human children and he and I had a special bond. My daughter liked him a lot too. When I came out of the vet's office and came home without him, my daughter did ask, "Where's Linus?" and I just told her at the time that he had to stay at the vet's because we couldn't take care of him anymore - that he had gotten too sick. She'd ask about him off and on again for a couple of weeks or so, but it got dramatically less frequent and now, after about 6 weeks since he went to sleep, she doesn't mention him at all, nor does she seem overly traumatized by the event.

We do have other cats and a dog, so I don't know if that part of your household is similar to mine, but at the age of 13 months (even younger than my daughter), not only will your daughter probably not remember the dog for very long - if the worst does happen it shouldn't cause her long-lasting trauma.

So what I'd recommend, based on what worked for us, is to let her take the lead. If she seems like she's asking about the dog, tell her that the dog had to stay at the vet's (or that the dog wasn't able to come home), and leave it at that. Chances are, though, that you won't have to deal with questions for a very long time because for a child that young, emotional and intellectual development won't make her too worried yet about a family pet who isn't there.

I really hope that your Daisy pulls through, and I'm really sorry that your poor dog has to go through all this. I'm pulling for her and your family!

J.

D., I AM SO SAD AND SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR SITUATION. I KNOW AS A PET OWNER THE HEARTACHE OF HAVING A "MEMBER OF YOUR FAMILY" SICK AND/OR INJURED. I DO NOT THINK YOU ARE OVER REACTING I KNOW HOW HARD A SITUAITON LIKE THIS MUST BE. IT IS TOO BAD THAT THIS HEARTLESS DELIVERY DRIVER HIT YOUR DOG AND JUST DROVE OFF, I DO THINK YOU SHOULD CONTACT THE COMPANY AND AT LEAST LET THEM KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU ABOUT HOW TO EXPLAIN TO YOUR 13 MONTH OLD WHAT HAPPENED BUT AS OTHERS HAVE SUGGESTED MAYBE TELLING DAISY HAS A BIG BOO BOO MIGHT BE THE BEST WAY TO APPROACH IT. YOUR DAUGHTER WILL PROBABLY START LOOKING FOR AND OR ASKING FOR DAISY IF SHE HAS NOT ALREADY AND THAT IS GOING TO BE HARDER FOR YOU THAN HER. NO, SHE WILL NOT REMEMBER DAISY WHEN SHE IS FIEV OR SIX, BUT SHE WILL REMEMBER (FOR NOW) DAY TO DAY THAT HER FRIEND IS NOT AROUND TO PLAY WITH. MAYBE YOU TWO SHOULD HAVE SOME QUALITY TIME TOGETHER (IT MIGHT HELP HER "FORGET" ABOUT DAISY FOR A LITTLE WHILE AND MAYBE IT WOULD HELP YOU OUT WITH DEALING WITH THIS TRAGEDY.) I WILL KEEP YOUR FAMILY IN MY THOUGTHS AND PRAYERS. GOD BLESS YOU ALL (ESPECIALLY DAISY) DURING THIS TIME. BEST OF LUCK AND LET EVERYBODY KNOW HOW THINGS TURN OUT. GOD BLESS!

Wow, I don't even know what to say! I would like to ask, however, what pizza place the driver was from. I have been a delivery driver in this town and worked at a few pizza joints. When I was a driver I signed no waiver, and as far as I know the other places I worked did not require drivers to sign waivers either. As for the driver that actually ran over your dog, shame on them! My dog was run over more than a year ago...it was completely my fault. I let her outside unattended, because typically she stays in her yard. Not that day! My goodness was it horrible, but the guy that hit her felt so bad he offered to pay for everything!!! I did not want him to has I felt it was my fault, but he insisted and ended up paying for half of her medical bill! I guess good people are hard to come by these days :( I just wanted to let you know about the waivers...or lack there of, and offer my support to your family. It's hard to explain something like this to a 13 month old due to lack of understanding. Maybe you could simply tell your daughter Daisy is sick and you have to play very gently with her. That way if Daisy gets better she gets better, and if things unfortunately take a turn for the worse, Daisy could just be getting more and more sick. On a much more positive note!!! I have a friend who has a Jack Russell who got run over by a dump truck, on which she spent $3000.00 as well, and he's as ornery and hyper as ever!!! I hope you find this helpful in some way!!! Best of luck to your family and Daisy!

I just wanted to tell you that I really think your daughter will have no memory of this event whatsoever. Studies have shown that people usually don't have memories before the age of three. Also, since Daisy has lived through all of this, I think you might be over-reacting. You don't really have to go into any great detail about Daisy's injuries. Your daughter won't understand anyway. All you really need to do is tell your daughter that Daisy has a boo-boo and show her how to be very gentle when touching Daisy. I don't want to be harsh, but I also hope you'll keep a better handle on Daisy's whereabouts from now on. Little dogs (or any dog for that matter) should not be left outside unattended for reasons just such as this. It's sad to say, but since Daisy wasn't tied up, you have virtually no rights to ask for damages. Good luck in nursing Daisy back to health.

Hi D...
i know its hard when u see ur furbaby going thru a trauma like this..and its hard to make understand a 13 months old why her buddy is not at home...most of the drivers don't care when they hit a dog or cat..but its a difficult situation for the family who owns the pet.
I hope and pray that all ur efforts pay u in the end,Daisy will be home to her little buddy and they will play together like before..
hugs to u .love to ur baby and special hug to Daisy...
Take care
F.

What a terrible situation to be in. I feel for you and your family. Is it possible to file a civil lawsuit against the driver? A local animal rights organization or SPCA may be able to give you advice regarding your rights as a pet owner. If you don't know where to start, your vet or animal hopsital may be able to point you in the right direction.

i am a big pet lover and my heart goes out to your daughter and your family. I pray Daisy makes it through all this. How can someone hit a dog and keep going? Thats cruel! I know the attatchment that you talk about . When I was 6 months pregnant we lost our Chloe to congential heart disease at 2 yrs old. I was a mess . it took me a long time to get over the loss of our dog.

You are so right how do you explain to a 13 mth old ? Thats tough. hopefully you wont have to worry about that. keep us posted!

hugs to you and your family and Daisy too!!!

I do feel bad for your situation. The truth of the matter is, you let your dog out and unattended. Your dog also was not on your property. The driver and his company are not liable at all for the accident.
A friend was out of town and had some one watching her 2 boxers. They some how got out and ran onto the street. Not only were both dogs injured but it caused a major accident. As the pet owner, she was responsible for all the damages to the cars and public properties.
It's a horrible lesson to learn at the expensive of your Daisy. What if Daisy wandered into the street and a driver swerved to miss her and hit a child. YOU would be at fault, not the driver.
I wish her well.

Hi D. - I'm so sorry to hear about Daisy and hope she gets better soon! That is extremely horrible and very sad that a person would hit a dog and run away. I'm surprised that isn't considered cruelty to animals. Did you call the local ASPCA to see if anything on your end could be done to have this person deal with this accident? Also, what about small claims court to have him/her help you with the cost?

As far as your daughter, I'm all about being honest even though she may not understand. I would sit my daughter down (if something God forbid happened to our doggie) and explain what happened. I guess though, it is easier sad than done....Either way, I wish you luck with all.

S.

I am so sorry to hear about what happened to your precious pet, and I hope she is able to come home to finish her recovery!
Unfortunately, as a pet owner, there are very little rights in these kinds of circumstances! I was driving on a VERY foggy road late one night, and a white husky appeared out of NOWHERE. After slamming on the breaks I still hit the hind portion of the dog. I was petrified, so I immediately called the police. They arrived and told me there was nothing I could do for the dog, (who was still alive, but lying on the side of the road) but that the dog's owner would be responsible for the damage to my car!! Who could be that selfish?? To hold a family accountable for the damage, after they have nearly lost a pet?!? Unfortunatly it is the "owners" responsibility to keep the animals on their private property or on a leash! I'm sure there have been TOO MANY lawsuits concerning "unattended" pets- please keep little Daisy safe!! I wish you the best!!

I'm really sorry to hear about Daisy, as a pet owner I know thats hard I want to commend you for doing everything you can to save her.

I know that you see this as your daughter's little buddy and she probably is but your daughter at 13 months old is not going to notice that her dog isn't in the house. You really don't have to worry about explaining anything to her.

I have two cats that have been here since day one of my daughters life. She's 16 months old. They could leave tomorrow and she would never notice. I used to take care of a two year old and they had to put his pet down. His mom mentioned it to him the day it happened and by the next day it was like he never had a pet at all.

My point in all this is, your daughter isn't going to be aware that the dog isn't there, I know this is very painful for you but for her, its not even a blip on her radar. Its not that she doesn't care about the dog its just her memory for those sorts of things isnt developed.

Bring your daughter home. It'll make this stressful time easier.

Good Lord, D.! If I didn't already know better, I would have thought you were talking about your daughters father or another close family member passing and not the family pet! I mean losing a pet is sad and all but life is hard and it gets a hell of a lot harder for our little ones as they get older unfortunately. I say use this as a learning lesson for yourself and your family to learn how to appropriately deal with loss and hardships in a healthy way. I hope I am not coming across disregarding your loss of the dog, but there are a lot of familys that have to deal with so much worse as far as death is concerned. I just thought maybe you should keep that in mind and thank heaven you have a happy and healthy family that loves each other and keep your family focused on that.

I'm saddened to hear what had happened. I pray and hope that your dog will pull though. My mom had sort of the same thing just a few years ago in Illinois. Her rotweiler was hit by a 1 1/2 ton pick-up truck. The dog pulled through, but was in really bad condition. She was eventually laid to rest because of the unbearable pain and pressure she had. I hope she/he makes it. Are you sure there is nothing you can file or argue against between the driver or the pizza place? There should be justice for a family pet as well as any other person in the family. As far as advice to relate to your daughter, I honestly can't help there because I have no pets of my own nor children with me to overcome that sort of obstacle. Sorry. Good luck to you.

Next time please don't let your dog off a leash. Since your dog was not leashed and you did not witness the incident, it is understandable that they are not requiring the pizza delivery guy to pay for your animal's medical expenses. Sometimes dogs get out and that's upsetting, but unless you can prove that he was driving irresponsibly there is nothing you can do.

D.,

I feel horrible for you and your family and especially for Daisy. I hope she is coming along and will be able to live a normal life again with her family. As a pet parent myself of two awesome females and a first time Mom of a beautiful 1 year old boy I felt I had to write you to tell you that THE BEST thing you can do for your pet(s) is to get a fence in your yard. Please do not let them run the streets even if it is "only" the neighbor's yard or house. I have seen so many horrible things happen to dogs and cats in my life of trying to help these poor creatures. They rely on us to protect them and keep them safe. Our Jack Russell, Bunny got out the front door one day and I was beside myself!! I was a basket case trying to get her to come to me and not go to the street...FINALLY she did but man, what a frightening experience! I cannot even imagine how you and your family feel. I feel so bad for you and had to reply to let you know. I have "saved" so many dogs that I have seen on highways, busy streets, back roads, etc and all they want to be is loved and protected. A good strong fence in your backyard (or front) would bring you so much peace of mind that Daisy will be safe and sound and you know where she is and who is with her at all times. Afterall, as you said, we are parents to our pets as well. You will be teaching your child a valuable lesson as well and she will learn to value and protect the lives of her pet(s) throughout her life. Please keep us posted. We are thinking of Daisy and your family and you have our prayers that she will be OK. Take care.