My Daughter Screams Everytime!

My 4 year old daughter is the SAME WAY! She hates water in her face (ears, eyes, etc.) and it drives me crazy when it come to washing her hair at bath time too. What I usually try to do is have her tip her head way back and rinse her hair with a cup and just try to be careful not to get it in her ears too much. That way it doesn't go in her eyes either.

As far as taking her to the YMCA, this may be a good idea, but I think that forcing her to do something that she really doesn't want to do is going to make her dislike it even more. It may just be a stage that when she gets a little older and sees other children enjoying, she may just get over. I hope this helps. :)

Wow. You could be describing my daughter. We do hair washing first not last. Because of soap being in the water. Several things that work. First, try letting her hold her head back and getting her hair wet under the running water. That sometimes works. Or, get a pair of goggles. This didn't work at first, took a year for it to work and only works for the eyes. Or let the bath fill up a small amount, have her lay on her back in the water and get her hair wet. Don't fill up the bath until you are done washing hair and then fill it up. Actually the best is a hand towel (because they are larger than a wash cloth), we can wrap it around her ears and eyes.

Also, you might want to read a book called "The Out-of-Sync Child". Can't remember the author. It has a section where they talk about this.

My daughter is 5 and wants to wash her own hair but doesn't do a good enough job in my opinion. I tell her to look up at the sky and close her eyes and away we wash her hair. She has short hair so it's very easy and fast to wash. You could try buying ear plugs so water doesn't get in her ears.You could put swimming goggles on her eyes too.
As far as the YMCA we did swim lessons all of last year and my daughter was paranoid of the water. The swim lessons helped so much that now she is swimming by herself and not afraid to drown anymore. I will tell you I've seen a few kids at lessons that will not get in the water and it holds up the class and is kinda annoying to the other kids that are ready. They do their lessons in I wanna say atleast 3 feet of water my four year old could touch on her tip toes sometimes. They have flotation devices for certain things and the teacher will kinda hold them but if they will not get in the water then they sit on the side of the pool with their feet in and watch and most parents look frustrated and embarassed. Or you could spend a little more money and get her private swim lessons at the ymca so they could cater more towards your daughters needs. My goal with the swim lessons was to get her comfortable with swimming and to teach her somewhat how to swim so she would be safe. She probaly took around 42 weeks of lessons last year and moved up 3 levels. According to the ymca they are really suppose to stay in one level like school and move up once a year so I was shocked my scardy cat moved that fast. Also with the ymca sometimes we got awesome instructors and sometimes we got not so and when we got a awesome instructor my daughter would fly through and learn tons and when we got a not so instructor she wouldn't learn a thing so it takes some patience. My daughter is still weirded out by swimming in lakes so my brother convinced her that a mermaid lives under the water and that worked. Good luck!

There is a item in the One Step Ahead magazine that you can order online at www.onestepahead.com it is Item #12416 and is called the Shampoo Rinse Cup it is only $8.95 andit is a pitcher that lets you rinse your babys hair , while shielding her face and eyes from soap and water. You just rest the rubbery panel against her forehead while pouring. I am getting one for my daughter because she also freaks out and I have a friend that has one and loves it.

This was the BEST $10 (including shipping) that I ever spent:

http://cgi.ebay.com/Personalized-Baby-Infant-Child-Toddle...

I think they have the supplies at Michael's or any craft store if you watned to make your own...but for the price Ava loves hers becuase its personalized!

K.-
Maybe ear plugs and goggles. I know, I know that sounds weird but hear me out. You can find cute ear plugs that could be just "water plugs" that she uses in the tub and pool. They make tye-dye (sp?) and intresting kinds whatever you like. That would keep the water out of her ears and then goggles, lots of choices theyre are kinds that she could just hold on her eyes or you could put them under her hair so you can still wash it. It worked for my little sister! As for fear of water, when I was little never wanted to swim- believe it or not I thought I would get eaten by sharks....yes pool sharks. (you see they were invisible, but still very scary!) :) too many JAWS movies I think :) anyways, my mom told me to swim in the pool like Ariel, the little mermaid -she gets away from the shark if you remember. anyways try to make a game out of it and it might work. i wish you luck!
N.

My daughter used to do the same thing so I started washing her hair right off the bat and then told her that if she screamed she wasn't going to get to play afterwards. It only took a couple of times of getting out right away for her to see that I meant business. Don't even let the toys into the water until you are done with her hair and she should follow along nicely.
Best of luck,
J.

my 4 year old has been showering on her own for about one year. she started with us in the shower with her, but now does it on her own. i still give her a bath a couple of times a week to make sure she gets a good soaking. she gets in the shower and i put on the shampoo and rub and then she rinses off. and, actually my 18month old showers with her too!

and...try swimming lessons asap. we just started our 4yr old this fall and her confidence in the water has exploded in just a couple of weeks. she puts her whole head in the water now and jumps in by herself. the lessons are definately worth the expense and weekly time committment.

have you talked to your doctor about your daughters sensitve ears? Maybe she is in pain when the water gets in them. My son had a lot of problems with his ears and loved water but hated getting his head (ears) wet, we got the plyable ear plugs used by kids with tubes in their ears (he had tubes but they had fallen out and he no longer needed the tubes but still didnt want water in his ears) you can find them at just about any retail store and dthey are pretty cheep. It worked for us, now i can barely get my little fish to keep his head above water and as an added plus he no longer asks for the plugs. Good luck

My son did not like his hair washed either at that age. He grew out of that phase. He still does not like the water running down his face. He does love to swim and does not mind getting his face wet then. He will only swim in a pool though, never a lake. If he can't see the bottom he wants nothing to do with it. I would not push your daughter to like the water with regards to swimming. It is possible that in the water she does not feel like she is grounded or feels like she does not have control. Give it time, she may or may not like to swim but pushing her to like water will only make her like it less. Get her involved in other activites at the YMCA and if you have time sit and watch the swimming lessons with the other children and see what kinds of reaction she has. She may see that it can be fun and if other kids like it and are not afraid then may be she will want to try it.

With regards to her ears you may want to consider taking her to her doctor, it is possible that the water hurts her ears or causes pressure on her ear drum. Another thing to try is the ear plugs you buy if your child has tubes. They are made out of a plastic or silcone material and seal the ear up nicely.

Have a great day!

I've seen an item in a child safety magazine (there's an online site too)that might help keep the water out of eyes and ears. It's a container that the side the water pours out is rubber instead of plastic. You have your child tilt thier head back and put the rubber portion up to the forhead and pour the water out. The rubber part helps the water go to the back of the head and not down the face, by molding around the shape of the forehead. Might be worth a try. My description may be bad and I can't remember the name of the magazine, off hand, but if you're interested you can message me privately and I'll try to find it.

Hi K.-
I too had this problem with both of my girls and what I finally did till they got over the whole water in the ears thing is I bought some Silly putty and put it in their ears while they had tubs and went swimming. It molds very nicely and nothing gets in there. I still do this with my 3 year old because she has tubes and you really do not want water getting in there.
For showering I just started my 5 year old on showering. My oldest also did not shower till 5.
Good Luck!
Congratulations on getting married next September.
B. L

K.-
I know what you are going through. When I was young, I hated having water in my eyes and ears when my mom washed my hair. For a long time (until I was about 6 or 7), my mom would wash my hair and I would lay back with a wash cloth over my eyes and my fingers plugging my ears. To this day, I hate it when water gets in my eyes and I wipe them off with a towel in the shower. It was only about 5 years ago or so (I'm 27 now), that I was finally able to wash my face in the shower by putting my face in the water. Maybe I would have turned out different if my mom would have not babied me so much. I also never cared for swimming either. I had the same eye problem. I'm not saying this is what will happen to your little girl but I thought I would share my experience with you.

what we did and still do for our girls is in the dollar store we found visor type hats to put on the girls and the water stays out of the face and ears. I have seen them at Walmart also. We played a game out of it and they played like they were ducks and the water just rolls off of the bill and not in the eyes or ears. I hope this helps. My oldest is 10 and has been taking her own shower for about a year. The middle one is 6 and still wants help with a shower but is getting better at doing it by herself. The youngest is 4 and doesn't want anything to do with it.

T.

My daughter went through the same problem. We also did the visor, didn't work because she wanted to take it off. I ended up tying her foam fish to the shower curtain bar and stuck some to the ceiling. I would tell her to look up at the fish when I go to rinse her hair. It actually worked! We thought the swimming lesson thing would work too but as soon as she went under the water for the first time, she now cries at each lesson. So much for that but at least bath time is more enjoyable :)

K. -

Here is a web link for the pitcher with the rubber side:

http://store.babycenter.com/product/safety_baby_care/bath...

I think it would help for the eyes, but I'm not sure about the ears. My nephew started showering on his own when he was 4 1/2... He is a very independent kid, and wants to do everything on his own. I think it just depends on the child, but I think that my brothers and I started showering on our own when we were about that age also. It's more work to have a little girl shower on her own, because if she doesn't get all of the conditioner out of her hair she has to get back in and rinse it out better. It will be especially difficult if she doesn't like to get her head wet in the first place.

Our daughter has had unbelievably curly gorgeous hair since the day she was born, and we've battled with her on washing it for 2 1/2 years!!!! I've tried everything, including visors...but, am convinced that nothing works!!! We wash her hair in the kitchen sink now...she lays on the counter on a towel with a pillow (or something soft), I give her a towel for her face and we use the sprayer. Now that she understands more, we try and tell her she has to take care of her hair because its so pretty, hoping she'll soon like to care for her hair and not cry. Good luck.

Wow... you have a lot of awesome responces! I feel kinda dumb responding now. LOL! But I will anyways. My son is 4 years old and his hair is longer than most girls. His hair is even longer than mine, reaching all the way down to his tail bone. He loves his hair, and doesn't want it cut. I don't have the heart to cut it either. He's so cute. LOL! But I'm in the same boat as you. My son loves his baths, but doesn't like water in his eyes or ears. I use a towel over his eyes too, and I have him lean his head all the way back as I pour a cup of water over his hair, missing his ears. I never thought of using plugs. I actually like the comment made by the woman who was babied by her mom too, cuz recently I've been trying to not give him the towel over his eyes, and tell him to trust me that I wont get the water in them if he listens to me and keeps his head back. I also agree with trying to get it over with by doing it first thing. My son is always 100% better once I'm done washing his hair. Hope everything works out!