My Daughter Is Peeing in Her Panties All the Time and Has Never Done this...HELP

My daughter went through this. She was potty trained before she was 1 yr old. I was divorced and lived with my parents till I married again, so while I worked my mom potty trained her. After I was married about a month, my daughter started peeing in her panties. Drove me up the wall because I knew she knew better. Finally someone told me that a child regresses back in their learning sometimes when there is a change in their life or something dramatic happens. Mine was marrying and changing enviroments and her having to adjust. I guess to a little child that's a big thing when you change from one family to another. So if there has been any changes in her life than what she is used too maybe that could be it. After awhile she started telling me when she had to go pee but till she did it was so frustrating. I just had to let her do it in her own time. Good luck.

Get rid of the pull ups altogether. We struggled with potty training my son, We drive 45 mins from daycare to home and so I would put him in a pull up for the car ride, then underware. I found that this was confusing to him. Once we put him in Underware all the time, we started having less accidents. It took about 3 months or so for him to poop on the potty. What I think we were doing wrong was he was afraid of pooping in the "Big" potty. We put a kids potty chair in the bathroom. We had been telling him that if he poops in his pants we were taking a car but if he went in the potty he got a brand new one and all the ones we took. This didn't work until we added the kids potty. Now he has been accident free for 2 weeks, and doing great. Try a reward and "punnishment" system. By punnishment I mean, take a toy or something she likes. But when she goes on the potty she gets something new, Have it on hand to give to her right then. Now when my son goes #2, he runs to us (pants still down) and says "I get a car".

I think your little girl is extremely confused... you don't want her to have accidents but you still put a pull up on her to poop in? I suggest using panties all day every day. No more pull ups!!! When she needs to go poop sit with her in the bathroom. Read her a book or blow some bubbles until she relaxes enough to poop or let her take a warm bath until she's relaxed enough to get out and get on the potty. I agree it will hurt her to hold her poop for several days but if she holds it for a day or two until she can't hold it any longer she will go one way or the other. I wouldn't punish her for any accidents, I think she's just confused and testing you. Encourage her to keep her panties dry and clean for a whole week for a prize, you can use a sticker chart or small candies for successful trips to the potty, too.

Sounds like one of two things. One is that maybe she has a bladder infection. This would cause her to feel like she has to pee all the time and it may also make it hard for her to make it to the potty when she really has to go. Or 2, it's a control issue and is related to the poop issue. If she likes to poop in the pull up, and you allow it, she may think that if she keeps peeing you'll put her in a pull up all the time. I would definatly take her to the ped. to check for a bladder infection or something similar. I'd also see about getting her to poop in the potty. My daughter didn't want to poop in the potty either. We would watch the potty videos, I put the potty on the floor in the living room so she could watch TV while she sat, we sat on it in the bathroom and read books, it was MISERABLE! She would hold it in, and then it would hurt b/c it was so hard, and so she would hold it in the next time. She ended up having to drink prune juice and have mineral oil mixed in with her milk so that it would keep the stool soft so she would go. It took a while and was VERY frustrating, but she finally got past it. I never even thought about putting her in pull ups, but she didn't ask either. I'm just wondering if maybe b/c you do put her in pullups it's actually contributing to the problem. Maybe try no pullups whatsoever. If she needs to poop, put her on the potty? Good Luck!

I have a daughter who will be three in a couple of months who was almost potty trained when she was right at 2 years old, but then suddendly starting wetting her pants and having "accidents", similar to what your daughter is doing. Here are my thoughts...Although you mentioned several times that your daughter was potty trained, she has never been potty trained at all. It sounds like it is absolutely a control issue with her, which was the case with my daughter and my oldest son, as well. With both, I finally reached a point at which I became so frustrated that I decided to not ever talk about going potty to them again. (That means not ever even asking if they need to go potty). I just pretty much acted as though I didn't care one way or the other if they went. With my daughter, I just kept putting her in panties and praising any successful trips to the potty. Very shortly after doing this with them both, they were 100% potty trained. It is so frustrating, though, when you know how intelligent they are, and there just seems to be nothing you can do. I do have to say the poopy part came second to peeing in the potty for both of them. I'm embarassed to say that towards the end with my daughter, I became so frustrated with her. She had gone to sit on the potty right at bed time, but then just wanted to sit and read...forever. Finally, around 9:45, I was so frustrated (and again I'm embarassed to say I did this) that I said, "That's okay. I guess you're just not big enough to go poopy in the potty. Let's just go to bed". Not even 1 minute later, she pooped, no problem! Little stinker! :-) That being said, I would toss the pull-ups all-together, unless she needs them overnight, in which case I would ONLY put them on her at bedtime...never when she requests them to go poopy. We have dealt with holding it in, too, and if your daughter goes that direction, I would suggest Miralax. Talk to you pediatrician first (if she starts holding it in). It's usually a lot less expensive with a prescription than in is over-the-counter, depending on your insurance, but if you get her on a schedule with this for a while, she will not be able to hold it in. It is safe and non-habit forming too, unlike a true laxative. Sorry this is so long, but stay strong, don't stress out about it, and good luck!!

Check out the possibility of a urinary tract infection. If that's not it, she is just not ready to be potty trained. Give her time. As for the poop-in-the-potty thing, be sure she has something under her feet. Toddlers squat to poop, which it sounds like she is doing. If her feet are not supported, she can't get the "push" she needs to move her bowels. Think about it -- you use your legs to do that. So be sure she is not dangling on the potty. Some kids don't feel safe up there -- since their feet aren't grounded. Aside from the pushing-off issue, that could also be the case.

Please, please do not treat this as disobedience. You will traumatize her. Be gentle in dealing with it. She will get it eventually. Two was really young for potty training. I know she was doing it well, but regression is not a cause for concern when she's this young.

Blessings,
P.

We just recently had the same thing happen with our daughter. She has been potty trained for several months now, with both peeing and pooping. Recently though, she started having accidents. Much of what was happening was that she would start to pee before she realized she needed to, because she was doing something more fun. We started having her go more often, asking her, and sometimes even just putting her on her potty when we new it was time to go. Also, the negative reactions from us defintely made the situation worse.
As for the pooping in her potty, that also took her awhile to accomplish. Finally what worked best was giving her a small piece of candy (or even just a few m&m's) every time she pooped in her potty. She's pretty regular with only pooping every other day, so she doesn't get a whole lot of candy.
Just be patient with her and know this will pass soon enough. Definitely keep working on the pooping part though! Good luck and you'll get through this phase of hers soon!

I would ask the Dr. it sounds like an infection...

A. J

Might be a bladder infection which can interfer with potty training. Won't hurt to speak with your pediatrician.

I have 2 girls- 6 and 3. It is pretty normal for pee to be easy and poop to be harder. Both of my balked at pooping in the potty but eventually it did happen. I know the same thing does not work for everyone but I was so READY for them too that I used Bribery. Call me a bad mom if you want but it worked. I took both to a toy store when I knew they were capable of going poop in the potty but wouldn't. I let them look and touch all the really NEAT toys and told them they could ONLY have the toy they wanted IF they went poop in the potty. (Of course this also means I had to be shown the poop in the potty when they were done since privacy is quite an issue with my kiddos.) I promised that no matter WHEN they pooped in the potty-we'd IMMEDIATELY leave and go to the store and buy the toy..

My firstborn went at 9pm. True to my word-we left as a family despite it being an hour past bedtime and bought her the toy she could not stop talking about. It was a scooby doo air inflated bag-the type you hit or kick or punch that springs right back to be hit again...It was a whopping $3.99 at Walmart and worth every penny. We let her stay up a while to play with it and made a great TO DO about why she had this fabulous toy and how great it was that she'd done what she'd did.

My second child is very girly and very into dolls. Any chance to get a new doll-especially one she'd recently spied was a pretty good incentive for her but it took a little longer for her to make it work. Different children-different personalities. She'd let a tiny little poop out in the potty and say she was done and then do the rest in her pants trying to do just what she absolutely had to in order to get what she wanted. I didn't let it count though and when she finally gave up-we went out-this time at 3 in the afternoon and I let her pick out a special doll. Her taste is a bit more demanding so this time I shelled out $15. but I still say it was worth it. It made a difficult process a good memory and everyday to get to play with the doll again-she had to go poop in the potty first...worked like a charm.

Hope you find something that works well for your daughter AND for you! Consistency is the big thing with potty training, but then since you're in the middle of it YOU already know that don't you! Hang in there! It WILL happen...

My daughter went pee-pee in panties at age 3 after being out-of-diapers since age 2!! The reason: a brand, new baby in the house. I didn't react - - just asked her if she needed to have a diaper and was very surprised when she nodded her little head "yes." I stuck her in one of the baby's diapers - - definitely a tight fit. She wore it around for awhile and - - that was it! Problem over.

I potty trained in the daycare setting for years.

I have 2 suggestions for you in regard to the pooping in the potty issue (copied and pasted from another post I responded to recently):

1. Put a TV tray in the bathroom for her to have a surface to do activities in the bathroom. It can help her to relax if she is not just "thinking about it". Have coloring books and crayons handy (also, puzzles, books, etc. that can be done on the small table). This way she may sit longer too. Set a timer for about 15 or 20 minutes and tell her that when the timer goes off she can get up, but she can "play" there until then. Take the timer out of her sight so she is not compelled to look at it (if it doesn't beep when you push the buttons, you may want to add a couple of minutes when she isn't looking if she is sitting well).

2. Do you have a potty training doll?

I used to use it to show the kids how to poop. Get some tootsie rolls (without her knowing you have them or it will ruin it). Hold the doll over the toilet. Without your daughter realizing it, drop a few tootsie rolls into the toilet behind the doll. Get excited when you hear it drop into the water. Get her to look and see that the doll has gone poop.

It may or may not work, but it is definately worth a try.

I know this may sound "gross", but since kids learn by example you may even want to allow her to be in the room when you go (once or twice) maybe while she is in the bath (so she won't leave the room). Just a thought. I had my husband show our boys how to pee, but it may work for poop too. Shrug.

Good luck!

P. <><

I would re-potty train her. Take her to the potty every hour and sit with her until something empties out. I would enforce the fact that peeing in her panties is bad and praise her for peeing in the pot. You must take control or it will get worse as she gets older. Bless her little heart. Good luck.

G.
www.gwendolynsphotography.com

She isn't potty trained. Put diapers back on her. She obviously isn't going to poop in the potty yet. However, she has figured out that she is in total control. You are her "puppet on a string" in this situation. Beautiful little princesses can pick up manipulation at a very young age. I know diapers are expensive and you are tired of them, but she isn't. There is no magic age, each child matures to the point of potty going at their own pace and all the signs are present, that she isn't there. Clearly, you love your children very much, there is an underlying concept here that she needs to grasp along with pooping in the potty. Teach her now or we will hear from you again when she is 13.

she may have a urinary tract infection...or maybe she is drinking more than usual??? but if she was doing fine and all of a sudden she is having these problems then i would tend to think she either has a bladder problem or a uti. i would definitley call the doctor just to be safe.

I completley agree with Ja. I think she is confused with the pull-up! I understand why you did it but she is not really fully potty trained until she is doing both in the potty. I would either put a pull up on her and wait to potty train in 6 months try again or just do it all at once and get rid of the pull-ups all together. If you worry about her holding it to long give her watermelon it is a natural diretic and she cant help but go. I let them see that I was using the last pull-up and that there were no more pull-ups. Not even at bed time, then I committed a weekend to it stripped them down naked. (this made them very aware of themselves) and at the end of the weekend we went to the store and bought new panties. I think she is doing great you just have to choose to commit to the training or wait. oh and no drinks an hour before bed. If you are consitent she will get it in no time!

I had no problem at all potty training either of my daughters. They were both potty trained right after they could walk.

My youngest had a couple of accidents after being potty trained for over a year when she started going to her new school. So I think it was just the change.

I think your daughter is very smart and therefore she maybe "playing" you since you'll put a pull up on her when she needs to poop. She is very smart since she can tell you she needs to go and then when she's done. I would suggest when she says she needs to go you put her on the pot and tell her big girls go poop on the potty. And then sit in there with her and when she does get really excited!

Just my opinion of course.

This too shall pass!

God bless you!

M.

Hi K.!
I've heard this scenario before- it was my friend who had a dgt that actually potty trained too early. Up until almost 4 she would up having her in pull ups for night time and naps. So dont worry- unless it hurts her to urinate- I would think its just commom- being trained too early.
As for the pooping- my friend"s son had the same problem it sounds weird but...they feel like its "part" of them leaving their body and have a hard time adjusting-hangin out in private and not feeling the "drop" seems to be more comforting- this too shall pass. Sometimes having them
preoccupied on the potty with a book or music may take their mind off of the dreaded plop! ha! Letting them know that it happens for mom or dad too is comforting for some.
We assume they know that but,,,,,,

Anyway- no one goes to kindergarten with a diaper and with the exception of a traumatic experience or change or pain during urinations- sounds to me like she just got trained too quickly and isnt ready for the full responsibility. ps- limit the nightime water as well-
Good luck and sounds like you have a wonderful life!

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