My Daughter - Oskaloosa,IA

Updated on January 31, 2012
M.D. asks from Oskaloosa, IA
9 answers

i have a three year old little girl. she is extremely bright and almost to bright for her own good. me and her father split one yr ago. since the split she has started acting out sexually with her toys. so apon persuing my concerns of what was going on i put my daughter in to play counciling. at the momentin time i was certain that maybe she had seen something she wasnt spose to. in the last oh about three weeks when she is sent to bed she will llay there til i am dozed off and she will completely undress herself. i have talked to her and let her know that this is not ok for a young lady to be doing that it is far to cold for a little to be doing this. then today when i went to pick her up from daycare her provider had told me that she had stripped once again and when my daughter was woke up she was naked...... is this normal????

just to add to this after hearing what others have said.......

my daughter and i were in the middle of walmart and she pointed to her teddy bears mid region and said this is a nutsack,,,,, and on other occurances she was caught mounting her teddy bears and putting her teady bear and dolls parts together

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers



answers from Minneapolis on

I wouldn't be concerned about the undressing itself. A lot of little kids do that. But talking about a "nutsack," mounting, and putting toys private parts together would make me very suspicious she may have been sexually abused. Yes, I would make an appointment with her pediatrician asap and not let her out of my sight until you find out where she is getting more sexual knowledge than a 3 year old should have.

3 moms found this helpful

More Answers


answers from Houston on

It's pretty normal for little kids (especially girls) to rub their privates on their toys because they discover if feels good, just like little boys who play with themselves as well.... however there does come a point when it isn't in the normal range, when it becomes obsessive and the child stops finding other ways to play or self soothe. Undressing is also fairly normal. My boys always would take off their clothes at night... i just slid their underwear back on and put a heavier blanket on them in case they got too cold. However, if she is acting provocatively or like she has seen or experienced something she should not know about, or acting out sexual scenarios, then you should definitely speak to her pediatrician about this b/c that is a major red flag... kids get molested all the time by their friends/family, so it isn't impossible that it hasn't happened.

We talked to my boys when they were 3 about being touched inappropriately. Teaching them young is really the best way to go. What kind of touching was okay, to say no, to not keep secrets for any adult or child who tries to touch them, that anything in the bikini area is NOT okay to be touched unless it is only for cleaning by a trusted caregiver, and if it is uncomfortable of goes on for too long, then to fight it and say stop and report it.... Only family and the Dr can see us naked, and only when bathing/changing clothes/getting a physical. We even tell our children to report if mom/dad/Dr is touching inappropriately, we want them to know we will listen to them and protect them.

Dr. Sears is an expert in this field and he has an article called "Genital play, what's normal and what's not". It has some great advice for you to consider here:


8 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,
I agree with some of the other moms on here. But, I have to say that it really does sound to me like your daughter's safety is being compromised. I couldn't even begin to guess as to who it may be, but if I could offer you my advice; it would be to take her to the doctor ASAP especially after overnight stays or just to be safe, check her "potty Parts" when she gets home from daycare as well as the forementioned events. If necessary, use a bath as a body check moment so she doesn't feel uncomfortable. That information will give you a clue as to what to do next. You know your baby better than anyone else, but I don't think any 3-year-old should have that much knolege of male anatomy ((especially by that term).
I wish you both the absolute best, and I will keep you in my prayers.

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Des Moines on

Make an appointment with your family doctor/her pediatrician and get a referral to one of the child protection centers. You're kind of in the middle so I'm not sure if they'll refer you to Blank in Des Moines, or St Lukes in Cedar Rapids or to the Quad cities or give you the choice. I've heard nothing but awesome things about Cedar Rapids and Des Moines, don't know anything about the other 2 centers (there's also one in Sioux City). But they SPECIALIZE in figuring out if a child's behavior is just at the concerning end of normal (remember, normal behavior is ALWAYS a range) or if there something more serious going on. And if there IS soemthing serious going on they are the experts at getting to the bottom of it and protecting the kid!

If your doctor won't refer you make the call yourself the Des Moines number is ###-###-#### and they open at 8

4 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

I have a 4 yr old and a 3 yr old girl. I am happily married. Both of my girls love to be naked around the house. They don't take their clothes off in school though. I have witnessed both of them at times touching themselves and even touching themselves with some sort of toy. Maybe some will disagree but to me its normal behavior for their age. They are curious and have no "shame" to associate that behavior with. I tell them if they want to do that please do it in private (in their room) not where other people can see you. You can look this up online for more info as well. I wouldn't worry about it too much unless you feel it in your gut that maybe your ex is exposing her to something inappropriate. Good luck

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Rochester on

My son is 4 and he loves to be naked! I laugh about it tell me his is silly! My hubby and I do not close out door when we go potty or change and when ever I go to take a shower and have some quiet, everyone decides they want to hang out in the bathroom!! So being naked is no big deal in my house. I know what you meen about getting to cold. I made a game out it and told my son that Mr. Freezy will come and get him if he is not well dressed :) that helped. I also told him that only family and the MD is allowed to see us naked. And that helped so that he is not undressing at the store :) I think I would ignore anything sexual or maybe go play with her and change things us so it is not sexual. Or maybe talk to her about why she is doing this. My older son at 3 had all the sex talks he could ever want, but he wanted to know all about the birds and the bees. But my 4 year old has not had one sex talk yet. He could care a less how his sister got here or got out of my tummy. All he cares is that she came with toys that he could play with:) good luck!

3 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

Yes, it's normal for young kids to like to be naked! However, if she's acting out sexual scenarios with dolls or toys, she may be exposed to inappropriate things, maybe while at dad's house? Knowing a slang term for privates shouldn't be shocking, her father may not refer to them in the way that you would. If you think that something is going on, please make an appointment to discuss with your daughter's pediatrician. Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

Take her to a pediatrician and tell him/her what you told us.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

She has waaaay more sexual knowledge than a 3 year old should. Where would she have heard the term "nutsack"? My GD is almost 10 and I bet she's never heard it (and her mother talks like a sailor)!

You need to get her into counseling/therapy ASAP. She has seen/heard/experienced things she should not have.

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions