My Childs Behavior

Updated on December 19, 2006
R.W. asks from Ashland, OH
7 answers

my daughter is 2 1/2 yrs old. i know she is in her "terrible twos" but i have another child also who went through those years. some how i need to figure out how to get her under control. i have tried many different things to get her to listen to me yet somehow i still fail. i end up giving in alot and i know i should not do that. but shes so out of control. any advice.

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answers from Youngstown on

hello R..
My son and my daughter were both the same way. Both of them at 2 1/2 started with the terrible 2's, and it lasted (im still there with my son), to almost 4. You may laugh, but with my daughter, I just took one day at a time, some days were better then others. I prayed alot ( please god let this be over soon), and I counted to 10 alot (for my own peace of mind), my daughter turned 5 in June, and she is like another child. She listens (most of the time), she helps me at home, and she is a very good sister to her brother (and he is currently trying the patience of both of us). My advice would be just take it one day at a time. Some children have a stronger will then other children, but if you keep reinforcing your rules and saying the same thing, they get it eventually. Whenever I am stressed, I call my 2 older sisters, its nice to be able to vent to someone who understands (and my sisters have teenagers now), they say " wait til you have a teenager !"



answers from Toledo on

hey i know what your going through i have an almost three year old myself that was so out of control i thought i was going to admit myself in a nut house. First of all, it's not your fault it's just there way of getting attention even if it's negative. I learned that not yelling at them and talking slowly and patiently works rather well. If not distract them, tell them of something fun you can do together or because of the holidays talk about santa claus that's sure to get any kids attention. Hope that helps and good luck!



answers from Lima on

Hey R.,
My advice is don't be to hard on yourself. You can only do so much. When you feel like you are over loaded just close your eyes and count to ten and take a deep breath. Then try involving her in little task to do. Give her small chores that you know she can do and when she does them reward her for her good behavior. You can do the star system where you make up a boared and everytime she is good she gets a gold star and when she is bad you take a star away. Once she gets so many stars do something special that she likes and see if she does a complete turn around plus it gets her ready for how they do thing's at school. I hope this helps.



answers from Columbus on

Hi R.!!

I remember the two's! With my daughter, I found more ways for her to be involved. For instance at the store, I will ask her to help me shop!! At home I turn everything into a game. They love games, and it usually worked me me. "Let's see who can listed the longest" those are the type of games I played with my daughter. I hope this helps. That age can be really trying.



answers from Cleveland on

R. W.
You have answered your own question. The reason she is so out of control.... YOU ARE GIVING IN TO HER DEMANDS.
You most likely stuck to your guns with the first child.
Set limits and do not waver. No matter how Hard it is. Remember it only gets harder to control them later. Do it now!
It may take walking out of a store or party or what ever but do what you say and say what you will do.
Also, remember that if you do not control this child what incentive does the other child have to behave?
It will be a snowball effect.
Hope that helps.



answers from Cleveland on

Your daughter is out of control because you LET her. Not to be mean but I have four of my own boys and now a 5 mos old granddaughter. I will never forget my oldest, now 21, was probably 17 yrs old when we were arguing and he came right out and told me, he didn't listen to me because I never followed through with my threats. That was a wake up call and needless to say, I changed it with my now 18 year old and the two younger. I think more before I threaten to punish but once I do, I stick to it. They will respect themselves and You much more. Try it. Merry Christmas



answers from Cleveland on

giving in is what she understands. children are very smart. they are learning what we teach them . so remember you are teaching her to be outta control then mom gives in . as fast as she picked that up is as fast as she will pick up that mom means what mom says. if she is 2 then 2 minute time out. if she hasnt had time outs then maybe start off with 20 secs. and work it up to 2 minutes. add a minute for each year of age. My son is a huge kid . was 13 pounds, 2 feet tall born and is 4 feet tall and 65 pounds now he is still 2 years old. i am only 5 feet 2 inches, I knew I had to be stern with him now cuz when he 5 he may be bigger than me. I change it up all the time. sometimes i count to 3 before he gets punished soemtimes there is no counting. trust me, stay stern and REMEMBER CRYING NEVER HURT ANYONE. do not give in to whining. Journey is 2 like i said and he has learned not to whine, mom doesnt like it and it gets him nothing and nowhere. learn the difference between cries. PBS.ORG is a great site kid can play with mouse hit F11 and screen will be just there are no advertisments so they can not click on anything wrong.

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