My Baby Wont Breastfeed!!!

Updated on September 29, 2010
M.M. asks from Beverly Hills, CA
26 answers

I had a C-section five days ago and had a beautiful baby girl. My milk didnt come until yesterday. I gave my baby formula milk for four days. Now try as I might she wont breastfeed. What should I do so that she will breastfeed and leave the formula milk? PLEASE HELP ME OUT! I AM GOING OUT OF MY MIND. If I try to breastfeed her she starts crying and wont stop. I cant let her cry like this. Is there a way to breastfeed her directly without using a bottle?

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So What Happened?

Hello Everyone,
I want to thankyou all for your helpful suggestions. Tried everything nothing worked, then suddenly after one month and five days, my friend pointed out that whenever I put a bib around my baby she opens her mouth and starts anticipating that she is given milk, so why dont I feed her after putting the bib around her. I did that a "voila" she started feeding at my breast and is still feeding. Although I am concered that I dont have enough milk to feed her fully.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

RELAX! Give her a bottle. The important thing is that you FEED her. Then, call the lactation consultant at the hospital where you delivered.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I went through this too and she never did breastfeed. I felt horrible but some babies just don't breastfeed. It's nothing we do, it's just what they decide.

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D.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

try breast feeding in the bathtub with the lights low..so you both can relax..and get a very slow flow nipple on the bottle..so that its hard for her to get the milk out and easier for her to get the breast milk..that is why she is rejecting you..b/c the milk comes easier from the bottle..i also had a C sec but i put my son on the boob as soon as i could..we had some ups and downs with the bfing..but i wound up bfing for 2 years.. if a slow flow nipple doesn't work try stuffing the nipple so milk won't come out then put her on the breast..keep trying..but also try to relax..and keep trying

xo

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

Try using the Playtex nurser with the brown (latex) nipple and use slow flow. That mimics breastfeeding better. Do contact your local la leche league and meet with a lactation consultant. I taught my preemie son to breastfeed after he had been on the hospital bottles for his 1st 6 weeks so it can be done. But you need to be pumping every 3 hours just as if baby was nursing to help get your supply going while you get this worked out. Don't be surprised or upset if you only get a little while pumping. This is the time when baby would be building your supply and a newborn doesn't take in much at a time-especially a breastfed baby!

If you ever have another-don't offer formula. It doesn't matter when your milk comes in. Baby gets the invaluable protection from the colostrum in the first few days. Breastfed babies don't "eat" like formula fed babies.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.E.

answers from Buffalo on

Try getting a clean eye dropper and take formula and drip it around your nipple and keep dripping it in her mouth to encourage her to latch and keep sucking. She is used to th ebottle and the taste of the formula. The bottle is easier to eat. they can smash the nipple and still get milk, but to nurse requires a propper technique. Please do not get mad or frustrated, HARD I KNOW she can feel that, and it will kkeep you from letting down properly.

My Daughter now 15 months had a sugar problem in the hospital and they refused to let me nurse before each feeding of formula and refused to use my sterile wide nippled bottle to feed her. She also had a high pallet and clamped hard while feeding. I tried every trick I know (after nursing 2 older kids) and went to a lactation consultent (who told me I should work there because I did all there was) all I could do was pump and bottle feed her. She got the goods but just not directly from me. It still hurts I did not get to bond with her like the others but we are still very close.

Please seek a lactation consultant for help. They are great!!!

2 moms found this helpful
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R.K.

answers from Boston on

Why were you giving a bottle if you were planning on breastfeeding? You are going to have to work to get her to latch and nurse now because she's already used to getting food the easy way. I suggest you call a lactation consultant.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I would just say to keep trying. Why did you give her formula if you were planning on breastfeeding? Not trying to be too nosey, but I had two c-sections and one natural birth. I breastfed all 3 of my kids as long as they wanted. And it's good for babies to get the collostrum that comes in first. Maybe she is just already used to the bottle...but if you are set on doing it, just don't give up. Go to a lactation specialist. Most hospitals have them.

1 mom found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Houston on

get a lactation consultant in there asap!or call the la leche league, she will breastfeed you just need a little support.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

You need to see a Lactation Consultant.

Bottle feeding and breastfeeding... are 2 different 'sucking' motions. A bottle is just by gravity. Breastfeeding, requires the baby to use mouth/tongue coordination to 'suck' and to get the letdown of the milk to get going... then there is the milk flow... which a baby also has to coordinate their sucking to.

The baby's mouth, should be encircling the entire areola... not just the nipple or milk flow will not flow.

She probably has nipple confusion... because she was on a bottle. And does not know how, to breast nurse.

BUT... in the meanwhile, does this mean she is NOT drinking anything? Or are you still supplementing with Formula? Or using Formula instead???
If so, then your milk production, will not be adequate. Milk supply and production is by supply and demand. If your baby is not breastfeeding... then your body will produce milk accordingly.... which means, your body may think it does not have to produce milk nor a lot.
So check your milk production TOO.

Put her to your breast, put your entire nipple/areola in her mouth, from the bottom lip.... when her mouth opens.... adjust her head/mouth so that she is reaching your nipple adequately at the right height/position etc.

I had c-sections too...but, in the hospital, the nurses put my kids to my breast immediately after I had my 1 hour recovery in the recovery room. And my kids did nurse. I had milk.

Bottles... are 'easier' for a baby to suck from because it is just gravity. If a baby then has to 'work' at sucking, from a breast, they may not like that and may balk at it. But it also depends if your milk is coming in adequately.

Bottom line is:
1) see a Lactation Consultant
2) feed from breast ON-demand....
3) Make SURE your baby is not getting dehydrated from lack of intake.... regardless of where her feedings are coming from. Bottle or breast.
4) A baby needs to feed, on-demand... and if she is NOT breastfeeding... then you must give her intake. Or it will affect her development.

all the best,
Susan

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C.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I had a similar problem with my son and he didn't equate my breasts with milk because my milk was very delayed in coming in. Have you tried squeezing out a little milk from your breasts into her mouth? This is what got my son interested. In the meantime, to prevent engorgement and to keep your supply up, use a breast pump and store the milk in the freezer. She will eventually get it. You just have to be persistent.

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S.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I had the same problem with both of my sons. With my first son I pumped and fed with a bottle. I went crazy with the amount of time I spent pumping, feeding and washing bottles and pump accessories. With my second son he wouldn't eat directly from me either. I started pumping and feeding him with a syringe. Again, feeding was difficult.

See if your hospital has a breastfeeding clinic. They will help figure out why your baby won't breastfeed and come up with solutions. They will also show you different positions so you can find which one works best for you. The nurses at the clinic I went to were very hands-on so be prepared for a stranger to be handling your breasts. :) For my second son, I ended up using a nipple shield because I have an overactive let-down. I would have never figured that out on my own. He's now 3 months old and a great eater. (He's been eating while I typed out this response.)

Good luck!

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T.K.

answers from Honolulu on

Don't give up!!! Hang in there. Try squeezing ur nipple so there's milk at the tip and the baby will taste it.
Or try pumping for a few minutes then try bf. Because the baby is use to the easy flow of the bottle, the breast is more of a challenge. Keep pumping to keep ur milk.

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B.V.

answers from Los Angeles on

Accept the situation as a gift. There are many advantages to bottle feeding.
It can make your life much easier and the baby will be fine and you will
have more time for her other needs, your husband etc.

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P.K.

answers from Las Vegas on

I had a hard time too. My doctor gave me these little clear flower petal looking things to put over my nipple. It's harder to get milk from the breast than the bottle but if you use this shield (also good so your nipples don't crack and fall off) it does simulate the bottle. After time you may be able to get rid of it. I did after about a week. Be patient and do what you can to increase milk supply. Pump, eat oatmeal (swear it works!), drink a lot of water to keep yourself hydrated and massage the breast around the nipple. When baby latches on milk should come down. I did this and it does seem a little silly. Don't let your hubby catch you because he'll think you'd like for him to do that.....NOOOOO! It is proven that nipple stimulation helps. Pumping is also stimulating to the nipple and if you get one of those zillion dollar pumps they're supposed to simulate baby's nursing. Don't give up!!!! It's so worth it. I had a really bad time the first 2-3 weeks and my husband was ready for me to throw in the towel. I'm very glad I didn't. Breastfeeding is beautiful because you know that your body can provide for every need this child has. It's empowering.

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D.M.

answers from San Diego on

You should get a lactation nurse to visit you - most hospitals have them - mine did. My baby did the same thing, and the nurse helped me extract some milk out for the baby - my boobs were rock hard because the milk came in over night. She was a miracle worker!

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S.B.

answers from San Diego on

Hi-
I had a C-Section w/ my daughter and she didn't latch on either so I pumped for 4 months until she finally did. In the hospital and at home as well I worked with a lactation specialist. They hooked me up with a tube device that had my milk in a bottle attacted to a small tube and taped to my finger. My daughter drank from that. It wasn't fun, but periodiaclly I kept putting her to the breast and eventually she did latch on.

My advise would to to first, be kind to yourself and not get frustrated. I know that's easier said then done!!
Invest in a good pump like the Medela Pump in Style
Meet with a Lactation Specialist at your hospital.

Good luck and please feel free to email me off-line if you need anything.
Stephanie

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C.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't quite understand why you did not breastfeed your baby - usually you put her on even if not much is coming yet - the foremilk is just as important for the baby... and it gives her time to bond and get used to you and this new way of eating... to answer your question why she doesn't now, is that she knows the bottle - she may have no idea what you want from her - or she already understands that she must work much harder for the breast than for the bottle.
my suggestion - throw away all the bottles. and just retrain her on the breast.
that IS the best. Don't give up!!!

:)

good luck! -c

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Call your local LeLeche League! They can guide you to a lactation specialist who can help you teach your baby to latch on......

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D.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

You can do this! Agree with all the folks who said to call a lactation consultant or your local chapter of La Leche League (llli.org). The Pump Station is also awesome!

I assume you are pumping in the meantime? If not, start now! Your body needs to know you want that milk, and you can give it to the baby. I suggest that you stop using the bottle now and give the breastmilk and formula through a dropper until you can get a good latch going.

Sorry you got some less than supportive comments - being a new M. is HARD, especially after major surgery, and with all the conflicting info you get.

Do your best to get this fixed ASAP - and if you don't, your baby will still do just fine.

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C.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

You have a lot of good answers already, but I just wanted to encourage you- you can do it. You are giving her your very best and I know it is breaking your heart. (BTW, those people who are questioning why you gave formula clearly did not read your question! My 2nd baby was in NICU and had to have bottles and it really freaked me out; with baby #1 my milk didn't come for over a week, and even then, not enough.)

It's horrible hearing her cry but she CAN learn and she'll be okay. My milk was very late, too, and I had to supplement, horrible bf problems for the first 6 weeks (I used that supplemental nursing thing with the tube on your nipple but it's really designed for people who don't have enough milk) but eventually she really took to it, and only recently weaned, actually (3 years!) So I just wanted to say it's awesome that you are trying and you can definitely do it. A couple of good resources for me were kellymom.com and Dr Jack Newman's website (he's a pediatrician who specializes in breastfeeding and if you email him he will answer you personally!) Oh- I know this is unusual but one of my friends tried for months to get her son to latch on and he finally did at month 6!! Amazing. And finally, even if you're not able to, please don't be too h*** o* yourself.

Oh- I just remembered- maybe try a nipple shield? My cousin did this- initially her motive was to protect her nipples that were super sore, but it seemed to help the baby move back and forth between breast and bottle, maybe because the shield felt similar- anyway, she gradually weaned him off the shield and now he breastfeeds normally.

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A.N.

answers from Las Vegas on

I couldn't get my son to breastfeed easily, and I had another friend that had the same issue a year before me, and she told me to do this, which worked. Take a dropper or medicine syringe and put a little pumped milk or formula in it, then put some on your nipple, then latch your baby on. You will probably need to do this multiple times, and will need to get the dropper in her mouth while she is sucking so you can let more out into her mouth. It is best to have help, someone else can be in control of the dropper.

The problem, most likely, is that she is so used to the bottle and it coming out as soon as she starts sucking, she doesn't want to have to wait for your letdown. This way you are keeping her interested, and if she is sucking, and you relax, you should be able to let down. You may also want to try pumping right before, just enough to let down and have your milk flowing, then she will just get it right from there.

You can do it, it might be frustrating and have you both crying, but it is doable, and it so worth it. Just keep trying, and if you can't get it to work, find a lactation consultant. Also, don't feed her formula right before you do this, and don't let her be starving either. If she eats every 2 hours, try this at an hour after eating, or try longer, but not too close to the 2 hours.

C.

answers from Hartford on

You have already gotten some good advice. I just wanted to add that some babies are never able to correctly breastfeed - don't beat yourself up over it. I had such a baby and although my lactation coach understood, other moms made me feel really inferior. Anyway, although I missed out on the bonding, I ended up pumping for a year so my son could still get the benefits of breast milk. It is not the most rewarding alternative, but another option should all else fail. If you do go this route, you are best off renting the very nice machines from the hospital. Good luck and congratulations.
C.

K.A.

answers from San Diego on

See if you can find a La Leche League leader near you http://www.llli.org/WebUS.html
They are brilliant women and have lots of knowledge to help.
There are some wonderful tips here that might help
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/baby/back-to-breast.html
She's still so little so hope is not lost.
You can get a supplementer that has a tube you tape near your nipple and a bag you fill with pumped milk or formula. When your baby latches they get both your nipple and the tube so milk comes out faster.
They look like this http://www.lact-aid.com/
Good luck and congratulations on your new daughter!

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K.H.

answers from San Diego on

Keep offering her your breast. At the same time, pump and give her the milk thru a bottle. You might want to contact your lactation person at the hospital where you delivered for some more tips.
I wanted to add that I breast and bottle fed both of my children(there is nothing wrong with this so some of you need to be less judgmental), breast feeding is a bit more difficult and is a learned behavior so don't give up. Also, make sure that you DO NOT use any scented lotions/body wash on your breasts. Again, see a lactation specialist and keep offering her your breast at each feeding.

Take a breath. Freaking out isn't going to help her.

Good Luck!

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S.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Please, Please go to the Pump Station today! There is one at the corner of Fountain and Vine and also one in Santa Monica. All of the ladies there are kind, nurturing, and will help you get your daughter to latch. Don't stop trying! You are giving your daughter the biggest gift by nursing her, congratulations!
Here's a link to the lactation consultant page:
http://www.pumpstation.com/pumpstation/dept.asp?s_id=0&am...

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

Are your breasts rock hard? pump a little to soften them up. Then rub some on your nipple and on her lips. If you can, squeeze a little into her mouth. She may cry a little, but then when she realizes, OH, MILK, she should latch on fine. If she doesn't, pump into a bottle, so that she can eat, and then call the lactation consultant. If you don' thave a number, call the hospital you delivered at, and ask them to direct you. You may also be able to call the ped for a LC recommendation. Know that you can go in and visit them and they will help you latch her on. There may also be a Breastfeeding support group in your area which are great, but don't wait for that, go to the LC now. Good luck, and congrats on wanting to breastfeed. Feel free to contact me if you need more advice, or support.

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