My Baby's Party ....some Opinions Please

Updated on May 25, 2010
S.M. asks from Miami, FL
19 answers

Hi everybody!
my baby turn 1 in January but i didnt make her a birthday party, now we are considering make a party in her honor in 2 weeks but its not a Bday party. I did a wish list in toysRus and put the # in everyone invitation i don't know if i did the right thing...i want her to have presents because in January she didn't get none because no one knew that it was her B-day but what do you was a bad idea put the wish list number in everyone invitation?

another you know any games for kids or grow ups that i can use in my baby party?

thanks so much

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So What Happened?

i'm sorry for the confusion here, i didn't express myself very good.
i didn't ask for presents...i just put that number in the invitation so my family don't spend their money in things that i don't need and i didn't put any expensive present, just little things like clothes and toys, anyways yes i know it was a bad idea...anyways this party isn't for her b-day either, its just a small-family-party for her i don't think that parties are only for BIRTHDAYS...
thanks for your answers !!

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answers from Tampa on

Personally I would never put a wish list in a babies party inviation but you have done it and it's to late to change the fact. Just relax and enjoy the party. You should have said it's a late 1st. Birthday party. People would be more responsive to that. I honestly wouldn't worry to much about games. If you have both adults and children it will be hard to play games. Just focus on the food, ice cream and cake and opening the presents. Everything else will fall into place..



answers from Tampa on

Yes, it was a bad idea. Just know better next time. You should have just skipped the party altogether.

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answers from Dallas on

I agree with everyone else. I would call and take back the gift list. I got an invitation from a neighbor once for his 3rd b-day and was repulsed to find a gift list in there. Like another poster said, if they wanted to get her something, they'd ask what she wants/needs and/or just get her something that they think is nice, or not. I don't expect gifts for my kids. It's my job to get them what they need, and a nice surprise if they get a nice present from someone. I think that lists make kids feel entitled and I would never do it.
Your little one is young and you are new at this, so don't sweat it too bad. Live and learn. :)

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Honolulu on

a party delayed 4 months... is sort of a long time to now make a party.
And you already put the ToysRus number in everyone's invitations.
Do people know her birthday was 4 months ago??
It may give the appearance that your are just trolling for presents, and want things for her.

I personally, have never been to a kids party that was 4 months delayed, nor have i been to a birthday party in which there was a "wish list" from a store included in the invitations. I know they do that with baby showers or for a wedding... but not a 'birthday' party per say.

Why did you decide to make a birthday party for her only now?
No matter what, even if you say its just a party for her honor... it will seem like a birthday party, because you included a toy "wish list" in the invitations and this then makes it into a "birthday party."
Did you actually state in the invitations that this is not a "birthday" party? Or did you just say it was a get together in her honor?
I think, people may misconstrue your intentions.

all the best,

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Jacksonville on

This really was in bad taste considering her birthday was so long ago. I agree that it comes off as "give my child gifts" instead of just a party.

Having a wish list is not in bad taste if it really was her birthday, tho. I know a lot of parents who do this now, to avoid the "can I have the receipt because my child does not like this, is not appropriate for her, against our parental beliefs, we already have it" issues that can come up at parties.

As for games--not at this age...a social talk with some toys for the kids is more than fine for parties at this age...

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Austin on

It is really not cool to have a party 4 months later just to get gifts. You can't tell me that it is really top most in your mind to "honor" her by doing this. A first birthday party is generally done just for immediate family and VERY close friends. You don't need games. You don't need gift bags.
It would be different if there was a good reason for not having the party in January. Then you could just have a delayed celebration. Dinner, maybe a small cake.
I really don't mean to sound harsh, but I would be hugely insulted if someone invited me to this "party". I wouldn't go. I wouldn't send a gift. I probably would avoid hanging out with you.

Added after your "what happened".
Actually, you did express yourself clearly. Providing someone a number so that they can buy what you want them to buy for your baby's party (it doesn't matter if it's for a birthday) on an invitation is still tacky. Also, if it's not a birthday party, then what is it? Just a dinner party? Then why in the world would you even think that people SHOULD bring a gift? It doesn't make sense.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

The stated expectation of gifts just sounds materialistic to me. And asking for/expecting gifts sounds like the parents' desire, not the child's. It seems inappropriate to register even a one-year-old for gifts, but maybe that's just me. If family members or invited friends want to know what your little girl enjoys, they can always ask.

I'm not sure what I would do, having already opened this social can of worms, other than to contact the invitees and tell them you feel like you've made a mistake. That's not a bad thing to do, and we don't necessarily get enough practice at it.

The first birthday or two are really more for the parents – even a two-year-old scarcely comprehends what a birthday means. Enjoy the gathering, take lots of pictures, make a scrapbook!

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answers from Missoula on

I personally would not have included a registry in an invitation to my child's birthday party. Your daughter is only 1, a present or two is probably more than sufficient, any more than that is likely to overwhelm her. At my son's first birthday party he opened 2 or 3 gifts, wanted to play with what he had opened and didn't want to open any more gifts.
As far as games go, are you having many older kids? In my experience 1 and 2 year-olds are not really into games. I wouldn't worry about it at this point.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Miami on

I think, given that her birthday was 5 months ago, inviting people to a party in her honor and asking for presents for her is inappropriate. By the way - registering for toys and putting that registration number in an invitation IS ASKING FOR PRESENTS! Even when you throw a birthday party around their birthday, I feel registering is not necessary; it's not a shower. If people want ideas of what to buy for your child, they'll ask. Besides all that, a one year old doesn't need a birthday party, other than a small family celebration - trust me, she will not remember. Also, kids do not need many toys at all....

Sorry to be harsh, but you asked, and that's how I feel about it. You can't undo it now, but you could call the poeple you sent those invites to and explain...

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answers from Tampa on

Honestly, I think you missed the boat on this one. Having a party now, 4 months late, and outright asking for gifts is tacky and breaks so many rules of social ettiquette I have lost count.

That being said, I made a big deal out of my first childs 1st bday and it was a pointless waste of money. She didn't care and doesn't remember it. My point is - she doesn't know you missed out on a bday party for her. Let it go.

My best advice... If you haven't mailed the invites yet - Don't mail them out. Chalk it up to one big bad idea. We all have them. That's why we need other mama's to help us see the mistakes we are sometimes too close to see ourselves.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Anchorage on

I would not register for a birthday, if you get things you can not use you simply return or exchange them. Having the party late is no big deal though, a lot of winter kids have spring parties rather than on their actual birthday.



answers from Miami on

Honestly, I think it's tacky to expect birthday presents. Period. If getting presents was a priority for you back in January, then you should have planned a party then. You sent the invites out with the numbers so you have to deal with the outcome now. I know I would be turned off because her birthday has already passed and it looks like greed to me.



answers from Orlando on

hello, if you are looking for ideas for a party, call Butterfly Dreams theme parties for kids, they come to you with everything including games, art & crafts etc. they are amazing. call them at ###-###-#### or look at there website at
and you will see a lot of different parties to choose from.
good luck



answers from New York on

When my son was in Kinder he got an invite with a Toys R Us wish list. I declined to go, it was a huge turn off. But that being said it is the stores that provide this service and make people think it is ok to request gifts. Your child is 1. You didn't have her B day in January. I hear excuses all the time about birthdays that are too close to or right after the holidays and people are overwhelmed etc. That is no excuse. My GF can never get it together in Oct for her daughters birthday as it's her busy time at work, too close to Holloween etc. My son's B day is 2 weeks before Christmas and I work in retail busiest time of year. I always have his B day in the midst of it all! You missed the boat this year. Have her 2nd B day in Jan. and call all the invitees and tell them you changed your mind about the party.



answers from Pittsburgh on

How did your immediate family "not know" it was her birthday?
anyway, what's done is done.
I don't think you need "games for a 1 yr old party.
Simple meal, cake & ice cream, smash cake or her & have your camera ready!



answers from Orlando on

I'm sure that you did not intend to "ask" for presents. I'm sure that you didn't want your loved ones to waste their money on things that you know you daughter didn't want or need. But I always feel that way when I get an invitation with the gift information inside.
Recommendation: When people ask you what she wants (not all will, some don't want to have to shop off a registry), but if they do, then tell them about your number. Otherwise, I wouldn't mention it. Sometimes they talk among themselves also, and the word might get out that way.



answers from Sarasota on

Hello there one and won't remember ok!!! I have four kids and my youngest will be one next month. All were doing is some simple friends and cake & ice cream!!



answers from Houston on

Was there a reason you weren't able to have her party in January that everyone will understand? A family emergency or such? If everyone who is invited understands why it couldn't happen sooner then I think you're fine to have the party now although I would eliminate the wish list if the invitations have not gone out yet. If it's just that you didn't get around to it or you weren't going to have one and now feel guilty, I would actually skip the party and just plan on having a 2 year old party next January. Your daughter won't know the difference, the party is for you at this point anyway. If you're just in the mood for a party (and who doesn't like a good party?) why not just have a BBQ with no strings attached regarding presents? Invite friends and family and just have fun. Your daughter will have a blast. She has no idea about presents yet anyway.

Good luck,



answers from Miami on

Sorry, but unless you are having a birthday party, asking for presents is tacky, and telling people what you expect to get is worse. I am sure that family and close friends were aware of her birthday in JAnuary and would have acknowledged with a gift at that time had they wanted to do so. At this point, all I can recommend is, for Heavens sake, don't waste any tome sending out thank you notes for the gifts.

Games for your party? Try a for kids and adults too AND with some cute bags to collect the filling, you've covered your party favors as well..

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