I have very active 2 year old twin boys. They generally play very well together. One of them continually throws almost anything inside our house. We have tried time outs with him and talking to him (ha, ha). These are not working. Does anyone have any suggestions as to what we could try? Thanks in advance.
Two possiblities:
1. Give him something that he can throw indoors.
2. Take him more often outside to play.
Ah yes, my son threw things too at that age. One thing that worked was taking away whatever he threw and putting it on the fridge, so he could see it but couldn't have it. I would leave it there for a few hours then hand it back saying "we do not throw things, you could hurt someone or break something", then if it got thrown again it was gone for 24 hours.
I got squishy very soft balls and said "these are the ONLY things okay to throw in the house and only in the playroom" or whatever space you have it is okay. Then he could play catch with his sister or a friend but that was the only thing allowed to be thrown. It helped us.
Talking too much at that age does little in my opinion, it is just about them knowing what is okay and what is not. Keep your instructions very simple and three worded otherwise they just turn you off.
If time outs don't work, try taking the toy and putting them in time out for two minutes. Just keep it up. It may not seem like it is working but it is. They just need consistency and you to have the same punishment for the crime every time.
Hi H.,
I'm a mom of 2 very active boys, one of whom is a 2.5 year old with a really good throwing arm. We tried talking and timeouts too with no effect. We did the basic stuff, like put away any hard balls, etc. that could cause damage because he doesnt really understand the difference between a hard leather baseball and a nerf. We finally started putting whatever he throws into timeout, explaining that we dont throw toys or balls or food, etc. in the house to help make the connection between throwing and the timeout. He figured out to not throw food very quickly because his meal went into timeout. It took 2 or 3 rounds of putting his dinner in timeout for a few minutes to break that habit. With balls or toys, I usually will give a warning or two before putting the toys into timeout.
I hope that helps!
We give the toys a time out - usually lasting several days up to a week. We also have soft balls that he can throw in the basement without consequences.
"Oh Oh, that toy isn't supposed to be thrown like that. It needs a time out. It keeps forgetting! Sorry, you'll have to find something else to play with. That toy needs a time out."...and then it's on top of the fridge for the duration of the time out.
My 4 year old daughter started to do that recently. What I did was take away everything she throws. She stopped within days of all her stuff disappearing one by one. Good Luck
My little boy loves to throw things as well, and has a really good arm for a 2-year old! I agree with removing toys that your son is throwing - if they are objects that will hurt someone, or break something. I've found with my son that if I give him an acceptable activity in addition to a restriction, he is more likely to listen and not throw a tantrum. For example, if he throws blocks I take the blocks away (usually for about 24 hours) and say "we don't throw blocks" and then I give him a ball. If he throws a ball in the kitchen, which is off-limits, then I remind him that we don't throw balls in the kitchen and tell him he can throw it in the hall or his bedroom; he has a toddler-size basketball hoop in his bedroom, which helps. If the throwing gets out of hand, then I sit down and we roll balls back and forth or I try to redirect him to a gentler activity. I've found this is pretty effective with my kids, especially since it's winter and we don't have a yard - we live in an apartment complex - for them to play in.
You should read Parenting with Love and Logic by Jim Fay and Dr. Foster Cline. What the other ladies have said sound like just what these guys would suggest. Also if you are a middle school teacher, it will help with your classroom too. I used to teach and wished I had known about Love and Logic then. I have only been using the techniques since the beginning of the year. It has totally changed our lives for the better and saved my sanity! Good luck with the throwing!
Take everything he throws away. Also remove all "balls" out of the house and make it clear they are for outside.
Boys will be boys, but if you take enough of his "thrown" toys etc. away--maybe put them in a laundry basket on the fridge....Maybe he could earn one back for everday he doesn't throw a toy. You may need to use a reward chart along with taking the toys away and explaining he is ruining / breaking things and that breaking things will not be tolerated. They are old enough to help you create a list of "house rules" as well
ex.
1. no breaking or throwing things
2. no climbing, jumping, running on furniture
3. brush teeth before school and bed
4. food only in the kitchen
etc. Let them make some of the rules,....then refer to the house rules as the "disciplinarian"... Make sure they understand why there are rules.
Hang in there.
R.
In addition to taking the thrown items away, we also just started placing our toddler outside when he threw. We'd say "Oh, I'm sorry you forgot that we only throw things when we are outside. This toy is in time out and it looks like you want to play outside." Then we'd put him outside for a couple of minutes. Usually he loved it and it helped him remember that outside is for rough play.
