My 1 Year Old Daughter Has a Terrible Temper.

ignore the tantrums - walk away and don't react to them.. just make sure she's safe if she throws herself to the floor.. I would casually say "let me know when you are done" and I'd leave the room.. my daughters tantrums were short lived.

as far as the hitting goes - 1 minute time outs. Follow Super nanny's advice and be really strong about it. sit her someplace and if she gets up, put her right back. make her apologize ( or hug you since she probably can't say sorry yet) after it's over. try not to show emotion though, she wants to get a rise out of you and she is getting it -
good luck

Hi C., My daughter went through a similar thing. She was older though, almost 3. She would throw a fit if she didn't get her way. I was so stumped as well. Then I started to just pick her up when she was acting like that and I put her in her room and shut the door. I would hold the door shut so she could not get out, and at first she would scream and cry in fear, I would talk nice and ask her if she was ready to behave. She would say yes, and beg me to let her out, I would and I would hug her and tell her that she cannot act like that. This really worked for me because every time she would start I would pick her up and begin to take her to her room, and she would immediatly stop. Then she just gave it up all together. A lot of people say to use a time out chair, however my daughter would not stay and it would not upset her enough, I had to use her room because she would have to stay in there by herself, and that she hated. If your daughter is only 1, then I would put her in her crib for 2 minutes. I would just ignore her when she hits you, she is looking for a reaction, and just pick her up and place her in her crib, or some where else and make her stay for 2 min. Don't make to much of it infront of her because the more reaction she gets the more she will do it. Everytime she does it just explain in a nice voice that you are hurt and that now she needs to have a time out to think about what she has done, and that it is completely unexceptable to hit any one. Hope this helps, Happy New Year.

Hi C.,

I had a similar problem with my son while he was at day care and the recomended me to try the Early Intrevention program which helps with there anger & fustration. You might want to call your local DHS office for the phone number, its for kids 3 and under and helps the parents how to help with dealing with there fustrations, tantrums, ets. Hope this can help.

Hey! I worked with children b4 becoming a stay at home mom as well. I find myself confused when certain things happen with my 13 month old. I think its because for some reason I dont really see him as a 13 month old, I see him as "my baby". You know all this Im sure, but welcome to the non-compliant stage. The classic struggle with "I'm my own person" "but I still need you all the time". Your daughter is most likely looking for boundries. I would not over react when she has a temper tantrum, because that would just encourage it. Most professionals agree that tantrums are a struggle within the child. Try picking her up and telling her that you want to help her calm her body down. If she hits you tell her that you want to help, but dont want to be hurt and put her down. Give her a bit to calm herself down. Every now and again remind her that you would like to help, but you cant if she hits you. Let her know that when she is feeling better you are available. My son is super spirited and yells at me all day long, he used to throw tantrums with me all the time but after a few months of me letting him know it was okay to be angry but that I wasnt going to get involved when he got violent, he only does it to his dad now. Im very scared of what he is going to be like at 2 because he acts just how most two year olds do. Im hoping that maybe he will have calmed down a bit by then. I remind myself all the time that I am raiseing a strong, healthy child, who feels safe to test boundries and express himself. Kudos to you, sounds like your little one is rather comfortable as well. Good luck!

Hi my son who is 16 months started the same thing at 1. I just let him have his temper tantrums it a way of getting out his fustration. but If he or she hits me or the other sibling they go in time out until they calm down.. my son sits on my lap but my daughter is old enough to stand in the corner. My advice theres a book but out my the lady that is on super nanny. Supernanny: How to Get the Best from Your Children (Paperback) this book really helped me...its like 10 bucks on amazon.
My problem right now is my daughter who is 2 and half. The tantrums get worse if they dont get there way. We moms now whats best for our kids so we got to sick to our guns and not let them get away with it. I am sure they will stop the tantrum as they get older....

Hey C.
I know exactly what you are talking about. I have a 14 month old who is doing similar stuff. When I brought her to her 1 year check up her pediatrician told me to expect this. He said that basically she is in this stage that can be very frustrating. She is really fighting within herself because she is trying to be independent but can't yet. For example learning to walk....they can do it but aren't able to do it well all the time. He said to be firm but understanding, be supportive and if she is really frustrated try to redirect or help her with whatever she is trying to do. AND of course as you said earlier...the more tired or stimulated she becomes the more easily frustrated she will get. Hope this helps!

There is one commonality aboout discipline in everything that I've ever read and thatis to give the behavior as little as attention as possible. I've read to acknowledge the behavior with something simple like "no hitting". Kids will do anything for attention and I think the less attention you give your daughter when she haves this way, the sooner it will pass. It wasn't until I made my daughter out to be the victim when my son would knock her down or whatever, and the less attention he got the behaviors decreased. The more we got on him for knocking her down the crazier the situation got. I hope this helps. Good luck.

Hi C.,
The onyl advice I can give (and you may already do this) is to discipline. I have had great luck with the "Supernanny", I even bought her book. I am a mother of 2 boys, 5 yr and 9 months. My 5 year old is like Jekyl and Hyde and we used to have a terrible time with his tantrums. Some of Jo's advice worked for us and it is definitly worth giving a chance. I unserstand your concern with your daughter seeing your temper and I am the same way, I know he got it from me (at least that is what I think) so I had to do a lot of work myself. It is hard and frustrating, but your daughter needs to know that what she is doing is unacceptable. It may take a bit of time, but she will learn. Good Luck!!!
K.