Mother's Rights

Updated on March 02, 2008
R.P. asks from Kodak, TN
21 answers

I am wondering if anyone can help me. If I left my husband and moved out of state to live with my parents, could my my husband do anything legally to stop me?

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M.C.

answers from New Orleans on

i dont know if he can stop you, but i do know that he can take the baby if he's the biological father. I know this from experience. If he gets a hold to the baby, he doesn't have to give her back bacause he's the father. so be careful, if i was you, id try to get some sort of sole parental rights. i've been there before, remember to stay strong. It will work out in due time. good luck

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S.

answers from New Orleans on

I think it varies from place to place but there are laws that can prevent you from leaving the state with the children. I don't really have specifics bt think it would be wise to call a lawyer ASAP and get some facts. Hope this helps somehow.

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L.R.

answers from Shreveport on

I think that only if there is a custody agreement in place you could get in trouble. If you have joint custody,then most times you have to inform each other of going out of state. If you are in the middle of a divorce at the moment, I would check with a lawyer. A pending case may also mean you can't leave. I have a friend who is trying to move to another state with her kids to be near family, but so far has been unsuccessful. There is a custody agreement in place in her case, though. So, long story short, you should contact a lawyer.

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H.P.

answers from Jonesboro on

Hi R.,

The only way he could do something is if he got a lawyer and went to court.I was divorced in 2005 and we had joint custody but I was the primary care giver.I was not even supposed to leave the state to vaction or anything like that with out telling him.I am not sure if there are hard feelings with your husband or not he might not mind if you move but if you do he could put a stop to it.I was lucky enough that my ex hated paying child support after a year and practically begged my new husband to adopt my 3 kids we had.But if the court sees him as unfit or if there is some kind of other problem you can file for full custody and then it is upto you if you move not him. There are many web sites that are good for info try a search engine.Good Luck H.

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H.G.

answers from Fayetteville on

I don't think so, unless he has custody of the baby. In the divorce, however, he can ask they require you to stay in the state. They don't have to grant it, and usually if you have already gotten established elsewhere, they won't do it. If you live in the other state long enough (you will have to research the requirements for the state you ar moving to) to establish residency, then you can file divorce in the new state. Good luck to you!

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K.P.

answers from Texarkana on

I am not one to tell another woman they are right or wrong about their decisions. I can understand getting a divorce must be hard and you probably need the help and support of your family. I don't know your situation but I do know my husbands. His 11 year old daughter just moved in with us this year and has been begging to live with her father since as long as I have known him. Her mother moved over 13 hrs away with her and he was a big portion of her life and a wonderful father. It hurt him more than I could ever imagine trying to hurt anyone and what is worst his daughter was suffering too. Yes you need to talk to a lawyer and I know in texas they can make it to were you are not allowed to move more than 100 miles away from the other parent. IF they do allow it you are responsible for meeting the other parent half way on ALL visitation or you can be held in contempt. I did a lot of research because we wanted to know a Father's rights. You can NOT stop him from communicating with your children but he can not make it into a stalking type situation either. My husband called his daughter EVERY night since she had moved and so when her mother got made at him and tried to stop it she really couldn't because it was a normal behavior for him to call and talk to her at least 5 - 10 minutes a night. I do wish you the best I know there are a million different situations for people and I hope yours is worked out best not only for you but for your children. To learn more about your state law if you can't go to a lawyer google it. That is how I found out so much about a father's rights.

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K.S.

answers from Fayetteville on

It depends upon the laws in your state. In many states, the answer is "Yes, he could stop you." I would consult with an attorney before making such a move.

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R.H.

answers from Alexandria on

Hi R.,

I'm a fellow Mississippian, from Natchez. My husband says that you definitely need to contact an attorney. I'm so sorry that whatever you are going through is forcing you to make this decision. I hope everything works out for you and your children. Take care.

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T.S.

answers from Little Rock on

It depends on what state you are in. In the state of Arkansas he can't do anything as long as you can't afford to support yourself on your own. In other states, it may be considered kidnapping. My best advice: CONSULT A LAWYER

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L.O.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Yes he could file kidnapping charges against you. Unfortunately you have to have his permission to take the kids out of state if a divorce is involved and he also has to have your permission if he takes them out of state.

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N.C.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Obviously being that you are a grown woman, he could not stop YOU from leaving but he can stop you from leaving with the child you two share. I would say get an attorney before making any decisions and good luck!

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M.C.

answers from New Orleans on

Yes he can stop you from leaving the state

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R.L.

answers from Shreveport on

Well, if you are not divorced and do not have custody/visitation papers yet, I would think he has equal rights to your kids. You need a lawyer, you really should have asked a lawyer before you moved. Being married changes everything. If you were not ever married to him, you could basically do whatever you want as long as it wasn't stated in the papers. Good luck!

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S.H.

answers from Fayetteville on

Yes he can. I found this out the hard way. I will have to go through an attorney and go to court showing just cause of why I needed to move out of state. I have 2 boys and my ex-husband has not had any contact with them in almost a year. But he is still there father and has legal right to see them. If he was to move out of state then there would be nothing to hold me here. Before you do anything contact a legal clinic or simply call an attorney and ask.

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S.D.

answers from Shreveport on

R.,

First, keep in mind that I am NOT a lawyer and I live in Louisiana. If there is no custody judgement by the courts, you have as much rights with your children as does their father. YOU CANNOT "KIDNAP" YOU OWN CHILD UNLESS THERE IS A COURT ORDER TO KEEP YOU FROM THE CHILDREN. If all your eggs are not in a row, and you are not ready to immediately "strike" with a lawyer as soon as you leave, your husband will probably file MISSING PERSONS with his local police. As this sounds like a sudden move to be conducted in secrecy, there is most likely some sort of DOMESTIC VIOLENCE involved in your relationship. Get involved with your parents local YWCA ASAP!!!! The more DV paperwork you have started, the better your chances to stay away with your children. Look into RESTRAINING ORDERS to protect you and your children (Federal law makes Restraining Orders FREE to obtain). They are usually faster to obtain than a Custody Ruling and they can set temporoary custody, child support, and decide visitation. You should be able to move with no problems. What I would suggest is that if you move out of state, I would IMMEDIATELY file for custody and divorce (if applicable) in the state that you will be residing with your parents to keep any court battles local to you. Start looking for an attorney before you move and as soon as you move, file for custody and get your husband served. Do not give him time to file in his state. This would be a "first come, first serve" type of issue as to which state gets jurisdiction. Interview at least 3 lawyers and the one that you decide to hire, follow their advise. I hope this helps. Keep in mind, that if you are ending up in Louisiana, it is harder for an out-of-state lawyer (your husbands) to represent him as Louisiana has different bar qualifications than any of the other 49 states -- we still have Nepolianic Law! This means your husband will have to pay A LOT more in lawyer fees to get a dual lawyer (Louisiana bar and another state bar) or he would have to hire a Louisiana Lawyer.

Good luck!

S.

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K.H.

answers from Shreveport on

As far as I know, you can leave but he does have rights to the kids. Anytime he wants the kids he is allowed to get them unless you do an emergency custody hearing. I don't know your circumstances but if you can prove him unfit or abusive, then you will have no problem keeping the children. Is he the father of both kids? Do the kids have his last name? If you answered no to these questions then I don't think he has rights. My son is 3 yrs old and does not hold his father's last name. I gave him my last name so that his father could not take him from me whenever he wanted.

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A.C.

answers from Jonesboro on

GET A LAWYER!!!! I am fixing to be a single mom (I just came out of an extremely abusive relationship)and I'm meeting with an attorney to get sole custody started before my baby is born. As they say in the court- IGNORANCE OF THE LAW IS NO EXCUSE!!!!If he has joint custody, it is my understanding that he can get you for kidnapping, at least I think that's how it works in MO. Be careful, and play it safe with the lawyer--- if you take matters into your own hands, something can go wrong and cost you your parental rights. Good luck, and I will keep you in my thoughts!!!

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D.P.

answers from Little Rock on

There is a law stating that you can not leave the state with your children.....that would be a problem, because of the children!!! Your husband would have to give his consent.....

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T.M.

answers from New Orleans on

no because neither one of you have custody. but you need to file for it cause he could come take them from you and theres nothing you can do about that. If you live in LA. CALL BLAINE HEBERT ###-###-#### HE IS A GREAT ATTORNEY EVEN IF ITS JUST TO TALK.

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C.J.

answers from New Orleans on

First and foremost - get an attorney! Obviously, all states differ when it comes to family law and only an attorney in that state will be able to give you reliable specifics. You are talking about your children here - don't just take advice and guesses and hope that you are doing the right thing.

In most states, it is illegal for you to move your children out of state without your husband's approval - even then, it should be in writing and on file in a courthouse.

Again, in most states, it takes at least 6 months you for to establish residency for you and your children in a new state. Once residency is established, then and only then can you file your case in that state.

Two things can happen to you and your children right now. 1) Your husband could simply pick the children up from school or daycare and take them home with him - and NOT bring them back and has every right to do so. Or 2) he can file with the court (in his state and still the state of residency of the children) and a Judge WILL order you to bring the children back.

Be careful, things like this can spiral out of control very fast and get very, very ugly.

Good luck, and again, get an attorney.

-CJones

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A.J.

answers from Fayetteville on

I think it depends of the state. I live in Arkansas. I have full custody of my son and for a brief period moved to another state. My ex-husband, who never cared about seeing his son, tried to get me in trouble but it didn't work.

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