More Fertility Questions

Updated on August 17, 2011
A.J. asks from Tacoma, WA
4 answers

So I have posted quite a few questions about PCOS, Infertility, and such. I am at a complete loss and I know that my Doctor went to school and is trained to advise me in the proper course of care, but I can't help but be frustrated. My DH has twin boys from a previous marriage and was tested during our initial strings of test and he is totally healthy. High count in fact. I on the other hand have PCOS and hypothyroid. I have been trying to conceive for 3 years. For two of those years I was told you aren't getting pregnant because of your weight. So I worked every day for 2 years and lost 90lbs. I am still overweight, but have hit a plateau. I have asked my doctor multiple times to put me on Metformin, which I have researched and found that many woman with PCOS who use this medication not only lose weight, but it helps them manage their symptoms and level out the hormones. For 6 months I have been on Clomid and I have ovulated every month but am still not pregnant. I ask her 2 months ago if we should check and make sure my uterus, tubes, and ovaries were good. I had an HSG and Nothing is block. I exercise 6 days a week, I eat a low GI diet, take all medications right, and have timed intercourse...still nothing. I feel like a freak. Like some sort of lab rat.

This Month around the time of my period I got some cramping, a little spotting, and was tired. I took a first response one day after my missed period and it was positive. A faint positive, but there were two lines. A few days later I retested with an off brand twice and they were both negative. So I figured the first response was wrong, but I made an appointment with my doctor tomorrow to get labs done...and then tonight a week and a half after my missed period I have started bleeding. I do realize this means that I was probably not pregnant in the first place, but it has me so upset.

I feel like a complete failure as a woman. My husband and I want this baby more than anything in the entire world. We have talked about other options such as adoption, but I want a baby of my own. It is getting harder and harder every day to face the fact that even though the doctor says," you can get pregnant. It just takes time and we won't give up." I feel completely lost. I know some people struggle for 5, 10, 20 years before they have a baby. I just feel as a moderately healthy 23 year old woman that this shouldn't be such a struggle. I feel like my doctor should be approaching my care differently. Like actually treating my PCOS and not just ovulation, because there was no proof that I wasn't ovulating on my own prior to being put on Clomid. I had a regular period every month. They were just heavy and painful. I have quite a few cysts, excess hair, oily skin, acne, ect...

And to be honest it is a hit to my self esteem. His ex-wife got pregnant the first month after she got off of Birth control with twins. We have been trying so hard and I can't even have one healthy baby. I know I shouldn't be torturing myself like this or comparing myself to her since no two women are the same, but I can't help it. My husband is very supportive and has been my rock through all of this, but I still can't help but feel he doesn't fully understand. I keep my self busy and lead a pretty stress free life. So relaxing, is not going to magically make me pregnant.

Please, if anyone has been through this. Especially any plus size mamas with PCOS, Hypothyroid, and/or insulin resistance. What medications worked for you? Did you have to resort to IUI or IVF? How long did it take you to get pregnant?

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answers from Los Angeles on

Aw honey, okay first of all you need to cut your self some slack.
Every person's body is so different.
I went to fertility doctors and took clomid, the next step was IVF.
One thing I will say is this:
we thought we were doing it at that right time and WE WEREN'T so
try doing it on a different schedule.
We looked into IVF, adoption even etc. then Wham-o got prenant.
And I was old. So it can happen.
There are so many factors and you have to look into all of them.
We were doing it at the wrong time! And we thought we were doing at the RIGHT time following the schedule.
So if there is anything I can say is:
-try doing it on a different schedule.
-change up the schedule even if the calendar says you don't really need to do it.
-visualize yourself w/your family
-see yourself pregnat and
-try to relax, de-stress!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Phoenix on

I encourage you to find a Dr who can really address your PCOS. I also have PCOS and am a Nurse Midwife so I have educated myself on the subject so I could become a Mom. I'm sorry about your recent loss. It sounds like you had what a Dr would call a "chemical pregnancy" which means that the baby was not able to implant fully and therefore the hormone levels fell giving you a negative test the second time. Early miscarriage is common with PCOS because often progesterone levels are not adequate to nourish the pregnancy.
Your Dr needs to treat your hormone imbalances and help you lose weight so that you can acheive and carry a healthy baby. Being overweight and having PCOS makes you more likely to have complications such as high blood pressure, gestational diabetes and premature birth. I encourage you to look at the risks of taking Clomid. It is linked with autism and twins or triplets (sounds great, but the pregnancies are REALLY HARD and then you have the struggle of raising them!). You might look into going to a reproductive endocrinologist that will help treat your PCOS, not just try to get you pregnant.
There is hope. I had 3 naturally conceived healthy babies after I lost weight and followed a low carb diet coupled with frequent exercise. PCOS is more than an infertility issue. It puts you at significant risk for diabetes, heart disease, etc. Early intervention is the key to lifelong health.



answers from Shreveport on

Change doctors!!! Now!! If your doctor wont listen to you and only wants to go one route with treatment and not take what you are saying into account then it is well past time to change doctors.
You should also know that there is a time limit for being on clomid. I didn't know that myself til I changed doctors because one just stuck me on clomid and that was all he was doing. I switched doctors and when she looked at my charts and saw how long I had been stuck on clomid she was shocked. There is now a note in my file that says no more clomid for me no matter what. It didn't work for me anyway since I was actually Oing on my own. I actually got pregnant with my second son after she stopped my clomid use.



answers from Chicago on

Hi there! I am feeling for you! Everyone deserves a chance at having their own kids. I had IVF for both my kids because I have lupus. I am with the top doctor in Chicago. My first question to you is are you at a place you feel comfortable? Does your doctor have a good track record. This is the kind of thing that you want to seek out the best, even if it means traveling to another state. My doctor always said " these days, we can get almost anyone pregnant" so there is hope for you. You are in WA and I know there is a mega top facility in CO. I can get the name of it for you if you want. My sister in laws sister went there and wound up with twins and she was having a heck of a time conceiving.
You shouldn't be so frustrated. Your doctor should be your teammate.
I would continue to work on your weight, but even plus size women get pregnant! Regarding your other health issues, your doctor should be doing whatever possible to keep all that in check. I know a few people who had quite a few issues with getting pregnant, and once they were, they were having shots of whatever it was they needed either weekly or daily throughout the entire pregnancy. What I am trying to say here is the the right doctor will know exactly what needs to be done for you in order to get you and keep you pregnant. It all starts with the doctor. I know in these times money is a huge factor, but if this means the world to you, then seeking out the best should be a priority. There is good, then there is great. I feel like my doctor was a God!!

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