Moms Who Worked While the Kids Were Young - Then Became SAHM

I did this. I decided to stop full time work once she started school. this way i could drop her off and pick her up..and volunteer. While she was at school..

I came up with some part time work on my own..I was a personal chef...catering, some event planning.

Did this for a couple of years. I was on call for some retail businesses when they needed help for vacations, illness, holidays....

Then I started my holiday decorating business.

It worked well for us, because there was no way my husband could get off from work at short notice.

I worked in a corporate setting when my kids were young. I left when my oldest was in 1st grade. The schedules were getting crazy, my younger one was having some issues, work was crazy - constant change & I was tired of cuddling up to my laptop each night @10 after getting everything settled for the day and my DH & I were in a better financial situation. I did a lot of volunteering at first and then picked up a PT job doing admin/CS type work while they were in school working a few days a week for a sales agent. I actually have since switched PT jobs - still a sales agent but different field. Not saying it is the most stimulating, but I need to be there when they get home and this gives me flexibility, a bit of cash, a way to keep some skills sharp & keeps me from filling up my time spending money ;-).

I've thought about going back in my field, but I can never get this time back. I don't need fancy cars & vacations. I coupon, live modestly and am thankful that I have this time with them.

Hi S.-

I worked until just after my 3rd child was born. I was the director of a child development center...so I could 'be there' with them...yet still work.

Then the now ex was promoted...and my income was not as needed...PLUS...the waking up of my 'babies' (then just over 2, just over 1, and an infant) seemed TOO INSANE!

I have been a SAHM since...and do NOT regret it. Oddly, I think 'older kiddos' are in more need of a parent at home than the youngers...

It also freed me to volunteer IN their respective classrooms...do some 'work' through church...and be available when my twins were born prematurely some years later.

Now, I do find myself wondering 'what I want to be when I grow up'...as the twins are now 16...

BUT...I have 'sub taught' for many years...and that...with a history of volunteering should help me when I look toward 'what I want to be when I grow up'...

I do NOT regret being at home for my kiddos...particularly when they got older...

Best Luck!
michele/cat

Hi! My daughter was in daycare from 6 weeks until 5 years, when we took her out of daycare the summer before she began Kindergarten.

There was a lot of discussion and planning that went into this decision. Our biggest reason for me to stay home was because of my daughter's sensory issues. It was getting too stressful working full time and then also having to deal with her meltdowns. The second reason was because of the time off from work that comes when kids go to school. Dr appts for the kid, Dr appts for me, sick days from school, sick days for me, school days off, a week off school for winter and spring break... Literally, I was seeing myself go IN the hole with not having enough vacation or sick time to cover it all. My husband traveled at the time for his sales job, so I was the one who was primary child raiser. Thus, I was the one taking time off from work to deal with all of this stuff.

The other aspect was the fact that I was the secondary breadwinner. The job I had at the time was okay, but the money I made basically paid for health insurance, the cost of daycare, my parking spot at the university where I worked, and some of the money went into my retirement fund. Other than that, there wasn't much left over from my paycheck for anything else. So essentially, I was working for the priviledge of having someone else raise my child. I had to take health insurance for me and my daughter because my husband's company was self-insured and wouldn't take us. Once I was no longer working, then both myself and my daughter landed on his health insurance plan.

My staying home and having my own freelance editing business (so I can stay busy and also so I have a resume with a job/have job references for the day I need to get an outside job again) so that I can raise our daughter has helped enourmously, not only in less stress for the household and for my daughter's peace of mind, but it has allowed my husband to gain valuable work experience and has pushed us up the economic ladder. I know that doesn't happen for everyone, but it's been in our favor.

As my daughter's gotten older and is now in middle school and soon to be in high school, I am available to go to all of her school functions during the day (like seeing her Canada exhibit or her science exhibit) as well as sign up to be a volunteer on any school function trips as well as being here in case I have to pick her up after school so she can be in extra curricular activities after school. Since I can rearrange my schedule to fit my needs (working at night or on the weekends if my week gets very busy), I'm able to run errands during the day so that I'm open/available to be with my husband and daughter at night and on the weekends.

My husband and I are happy with how our arrangement is working out. He's currently talking about taking a certification test, so that he would be certified and available to make an even bigger salary, and I'm currently looking into some schooling/certification programs so I can start working on my next career move, which will hopefully be in holistic medicine and/or spritiual healing/counseling. This is something I can do on my own, now, while my daughter is still going to school so that I can open a practice when she is in high school/graduated and I have even more flexibility with my time.

Being home truly has been the best decision we've ever made. Finances were tight when we first began but have gotten better and better over the years. Since I have my own business, I do not feel as if I have relegated "my" work experience to the back burner for that of my husband; rather, we're working together to give our daughter the best possible upbringing while at the same time making life managable for us.

That, in the end, is what counts.

I worked outside the home until my son was about 6 yrs of age.. Then, for many different reasons, I left my job and it left me.. :) and moved down South.
Since, I have been a SAHM and because my husband's schedule is ALWAYS changing , it allows me to take and pick my son up from school and attend to his needs/schedule. Also, my job used to require that I get in at 4:30am.. that said, I was always so tired come evening and it meant not spending as much quality time with my son.. Now, I do have more time and energy..
I may have missed a lot when he was younger.. but my husband had a different job then and was often around in the mornings. so at least my son had one parent home at times.. All and all, my staying home once my son was older was a good choice for us as a family.... I never take for granted my time with my son. .it's all passed so quickly..

eventually I will go back to work... although, not sure what I will do.... that to me does feel intimidating ... I won't be a spring chicken.. but even so.. I have NO regrets in the least taking this time for my son...

good luck to you

S., I stayed in the workforce with both of my kids until we moved, and then I started staying home with them. My older son was 5 and my younger son was almost 3. I also went from having daycare mommies help me "raise" my children to me doing it alone. It was hard because I'd never stayed home with kids before. I had a hard time establishing a schedule for them. Though I was glad to not have to work so hard, dealing with all the work of getting everyone out of the house in the mornings, I missed my work life and had a lot of trouble making the transition from working mom to stay at home mom.

My younger son had some special needs, and this became my "new job". It involved driving him to speech therapy and OT several times a week, and us working on his home program twice a day, every day. Of course, there were ancillary services that were "fun", but what he needed, like gymnastics, and other sports related classes that helped them burn off energy and learn how to do what most little boys want to do (tee-ball, basketball, soccer, swimming). I filled our days with stuff like this. It was hard having them at home because they had so much energy.

I guess you would say that I kind of made a "job" out of staying at home, but figuring it out took a long time and I wasn't very happy for a while.

I wouldn't have quit my job if we hadn't have moved. I loved working. However, it's a good thing I did because my son needed my help. If your child has NO special needs, you won't have to deal with that.

Dawn

Me...I worked FT with my first baby. From 8 wks until the summer before she started KG. I LOVED that summer I started staying home with her. Then I had 2 more babies, but there was a 10 year gap.

Children always need you. I don't know if one age is necessarily 'better' than another. One misses out on all the firsts when working while younger. But as a teenager, I really see the need to be at home monitoring who comes and goes, and juggling all the extra-curricular activities from dentist, orthodontist, scouts, karate, piano lessons, dance, science fair, home work, church, xbox, chores, friends, etc. etc. Life gets exponentially bigger and more complex. Babies needs were simple compared to this. I was lonelier when they were babies and tending to everything alone. But I am so busy, so it's different kind of on the go loneliness at times.

HTH!

Worked when they were young. My husband was a cop n worked shifts so he was home more than your average bear. Middle school came I stayed home. I felt it was important to be around the MS/HS years.

When my son was four months old, I returned to work doing after-preschool care for a little girl I had nannied for. The preschool is close to my house, and so we'd just pick her up and bring her home. I added a buddy of hers for the next school year, so she'd have some company while I nursed my son. It worked out very well until she and that child finished preschool; Kiddo was likely just two at that time.

The following January, I started a preschool in my home. That was a challenge and a half, esp. with having Kiddo as part of my group. The following September he was nearly 3.5 years and able to start at the other preschool, which was good for us both. At that point, my neighbor-- a neat SAHD-- became his after-preschool person so I could finish running my morning program, clean, and then prep for the next day. It was an exhausting year and a half that we had the preschool-- at that point, we were in the position for me to close the school and turn our house back into 'home' again. It was strange, not working, and I really struggled with it until recently. We reduced Kiddo's preschool schedule to cut costs and I've been very happy with this arrangement. Then kindergarten started and we're not paying the full-day tuition-- with half-day, I get more time with Kiddo and he gets more time to play.

We make it work because I am very self-motivated. (and maybe because I'm not 'into' clothes or hair or some of the other stuff some people spend money on. Not said sanctimoniously-- just never much cared for getting fancied up.) We don't hire out for anything that I can do, except for going out to dinner some nights. Otherwise, we live pretty modestly. I'm so thankful we have the ability for me to stay at home. I have a pet project I'm working on at the school which will likely take me until the end of the school year.... and then I have another grand scheme in mind for making money at craft fairs and possibly online. I like being alone, and I like keeping busy, so all of this works well for me.

Me: I have 2 kids.
I stayed home with them from birth until they were both in Elementary school.
Now I work part-time. But I work part-time so that, I can still be home with them/take them to school/pick them up from school and so they do not have to go to after school care. Which I am not impressed with, at my kids' school.

Okay, so now I work part time when my kids are in school. BUT I still do EVERYTHING as I did like when I was a full-time SAHM only.
Before I just was home, and my kids did go to Preschool on some days.
But either way, it is still a TON of things to do, and busy... even if your kids are in school. It is not just Mommy being by herself and lounging.
And, I did also, before I had this part time job, did volunteering at my kids' school.
And even when I was just home with my kids as a full time SAHM, I did child-care in my home as my "job."

When you are just a full time SAHM, it is taking care of the home and much more, even if the kids are in school part of the day.
And once you drop your kids off at school...before you know it, it is time to pick them up after school, already.

If I can figure out a way to make this work, it's what I want to do. My kids are 4 and they have another year before we put them in kindergarten so I have a year to figure out what to do.

I figure once they get into school, it would be nice to be able to have the flexibility to let them participate in afternoon activities (ex: sports), possibly be involved in their school (parent volunteer), and generally be around for them after school for homework and such. The other option would be to find a part time nanny who can cover the afternoon hours and then the kids would at least be able to do stuff after school if desired.

I hope a lot of people answer bc I'm considering the same thing! I can say my sister has older kids and believes it's more impt to stay home when they're older. As well, mine are K and 3rd now and I don't regret having worked so far. I just posted how now that they're older, I feel like they can get a better idea that mommy has a very good job and women can be successful and all the studying I'm goign to ask them to do can have a payoff. They seem kind of proud of me now and one will say she wants to be just like me when she grows up. Of course it's been hard but I also have some flexibility at work so have been able to go to school a lot vs have to miss their functions. We also have always had a full time nanny so not the stress I imagine daycare is in terms of getting them there everyday etc. It also I think took some pressure off of them bc we weren't rushing a lot. For me, I have a great job that I likely couldn't get back 5 or 10 years from now and I'm so specialized I'm not sure I could really ever get another job if I left. So it's made sense to make hay while the sun shines but if you're in a similar situation, I wouldn't worry you're missing it all by working now. To be honest, my kids don't really remember when they were 2 or 3... I think they'd not be so well adjusted if we didn't have great childcare for those years so of course that's impt but I think a mom working those ages can be ok. I feel like now that they're older, things are more complicated and I want to be there to answer certain questions and make the judgement calls that are more frequently needed. So I plan to stop fairly soon but am glad we've saved a lot of money in the meantime. As I said, i'm not sure I could ever get another job or at least one that pays well nevermind nearly as well as my current one does. I think for women who are in a field that they can get back into after being home, it's a bit different equation.

When my oldest was 14 months I went back to work PT. I stopped working my PT job when my youngest was born. I have now been a SAHM for 10 years and love it!

Just wanted to share that while I work at home (run a daycare), I very badly want to return to work most days. I love my kids...but it's 24/7 of the SAME thing. Of course my kids are 1 and 2.5, I'm sure it would be vastly different if they were in school and I didn't have to work.

I really do think you have to have a certain personality to be able to stay at home and enjoy it...I can admit that I don't. I love that I'm able to watch my babies grow and see their firsts...but I miss feeling like I can do something other than clean and change diapers.

Maybe I would feel differently if my kids were older and I could actually get things done during the day...hard to say. But I plan on going back to work once they're in school, if not before.

Just thought I'd throw it out there as I thought I would love not working for someone else...but it's definitely a trade-off.

I have worked when the kids were little and stayed home and worked and stayed home and worked.

Being a military wife and not having children in the beginning I worked and then we adopted and I worked. Hubby got orders and I got pregnant and we moved out of country. So I stayed home for four years with both children going to school shows and projects. To keep busy I became a member of the spouse group which met once a month. We returned to the states and I went back to work for about two and a half years (in Vegas when the MGM burned). We landed in Germany for a total of eight years and I stayed home sort of. I taught ceramics, was a building monitor in the evening for college classes and began sewing stripes and patches on uniforms full time in a shop and at home. While in Germany I was able to go with my daughter on class trips to other countries and to send mys on trips to other countries. We ,dad and I, went to football game championship finals. We moved back to the states for the last time.
I started real estate as both kids were graduated or in high school and I could keep an eye on them. That lasted for a short time as dad retired and we needed extra money and I went back to work.

I have learned that if you can do what you really want or can find a way to work part time to keep yourself current in skills it is great. This will be my last job when I decide to retire and work for myself in my boutique of custom clothing for kids. So as I write I am rewiring my retirement plans.

There have been pluses and minuses for both. But my situation was a bit different than most as I had times when work was not possible even if I wanted to work. But I did very much enjoy the time I had home with each child at times in their lives at different ages.

Good luck to you all.

The other S.

PS I will probably make cloth diapers this weekend.

I worked from the time my eldest was five months old until she was a little over two years old when my middle daughter was born. I went back to work several months ago, so I was a SAHM for nearly ten years.

Even while I was home, I made sure that they all had at least part time preschool the year before their kindergarten year. With my middle daughter, she ended up with two preschool years due to some serious developmental delays and her learning disorders.

Now the girls are all in school full time and either my husband or I are home whenever the girls are. There's always someone here. It works out well for us.

Staying home once the kids are in school just squashes your work day into an 8 or 9 hour day, instead of a 14 or 15 hour day.