Mom Feeling Depressed During Pregnancy

Hi Celeste,
I have been to counseling several times over the past 19 years as well, and I can say it has helped a great deal.
WE have actually started having family meetings to get things under control in the house, with the counselor as a mediator.

It is normal to feel this way when you are pregnant, so far as the tiredness goes, mine did not leave until I was closer to 15 weeks. I actually expected to wake up at 3 months and be back to normal again. Not so. You will start to physically feel better, but maybe not emotionally.
Often times the seratonin receptors don't do their jobs, and absorb all of the seratonin like they should, so we need the extra help with the medication. Consult with your
mid wife, and see what she says, but take care of it now,
because things will greatly change once you deliver the baby, and your hormones will go haywire again. Good luck :) I have been in your shoes with three kids, and it seems as though life is a revolving door, and we never know what will be on the other side of it. Take it one day at a time, that is all we can do.
W.

I'm sorry you've been feeling this way! You are definitely not alone though, it is definitely not unusual to feel depressed during pregnancy, or afterwards as well. There are so many different changes in hormone levels going on in our bodies during pregnancy, that it can definitely take an emotional toll. Talking to a counselor can really be great, I would recommend that you look into that. It sounds like you prefer not to take medications, but just so you know there are medications that can be described during pregnancy for depression. Have you talked to your midwife about the morning sickness? I had severe morning sickness all throughout my pregnancy (hyperemesis gravidum) and the only thing that kept me out of the hospital was Zofran (a category B medication). So if it is debilitating you, please ask your midwife about your different options for treating it (in many cases it can be treated without medication). And please be kind to yourself! It's okay to lay down and rest, and take a break from doing housework. It's okay to rely on other people's help more during this time, like your husband, family, and friends. Maybe at night try some kind of meditation, or even just spend some time just focusing on you and the baby (try to imagine or feel his/her heart beat, have it be a special time just for you two, etc). Anyway, I don't know if any of this helps, but I hope you feel better soon! Tons of hugs!

hi celeste....i really sympathize with your situation. i have dealt on and off with fairly mild depression for the last several years. i am a nurse and am not a person who likes to take medication either but i have to say, the two times in my life i have needed it, it has been a big help. that being said, i did not feel safe and comfortable (no matter how much "they" say it's okay) with taking anti-depressants during pregnancy so i stopped when my husband and i were going to start trying for our first child, who is now almost 4. i was then off of them until about 6 months ago, when trying to keep up with being the mother of two (i now have another sweetheart who is 15 months old), working, and keeping up a household started to wear on me a little. the 1st trimester is such a trying time and the "sad" and tired that you feel when pregnant is hard to deal with when added on to existing feelings of "sad" and tired. this is so rambling, but i just want you to know you are definitely not the only one.

I should also say that i have been in counseling pretty regularly for the past 3 1/2 years and i LOVE it! my husband and i go together and i cannot tell you how much it has enriched our relationship and our family life. you not only learn more about yourself but you are learning more about your spouse.i am not sure about your husband's thoughts/ideas on this type of situation but it may actually be good for him to hear your discussion with your midwife on this topic. She will, of course, validate your feelings on this and it may be good for him to hear that you're not just being a "hormonal," "irrational," pregnant woman.

as for morning sickness, hopefully you're almost done but if you're not, i also highly recommend zofran. it is non-drowsy (compared to other anti-nausea meds) and is pretty harmless to your sweet baby you're caring. most mommies i know, myself included, have their nausea end a little after the beginning of the 2nd trimester even though they say that it's usually only in the 1st trimester.

well, i obviously need to go to sleep after working evening shift now because i have rambled on tooooo long. best wishes to you and just remember to take it easy on yourself and not judge yourself too much during this time even though others may try to. good luck! :)

Talk to your doctor alone then with you husband. You need to talk about your issues with the doctor then have the doctor help explain what is going on to your husband. Maybe if the doctor lets him know that this does happen and you aren't just being lazy maybe he can offer some support. He and his family need to give you a break and help instead of criticize. Once the pregnancy is over your will be even worse and post partum depression can get out of control so quickly. How your are feeling right now is how I felt with my second pregnancy. I can tell you it only gets worse if you don't talk to someone about it. Maybe your md can recommend a good accupuncturist. They can do amazing things and it's a whole lot better than taking medication. Some are safe during pregnancy but most should not be used. Best of luck.

Hi Celeste,

It sounds like you have some underlying depression that has been aggravated by all the hormonal changes of pregnancy. I would advise you to see a counselor/psychologist/psychiatrist and get some therapy to help improve your depression. After all, you want to be in the best emotional/mental health when your baby comes. :) In terms of medications, you probably should talk with your doctor to see if the benefits outweigh the risks given your pregnancy.

Hope this helps!

J. :)

Hi Celeste,

I think it is wonderful that you asked us for help. Yes, a therapist is a great idea-- there are lots of moms out there who feel the same way you do--but stay silent and never get the support that they need. It sounds like you have a combination of things going on with your hormones being pregnant, and also maybe some situational depression. I'm not a doctor,so I would definitely say to speak with your midwife in private if you feel most comfortable that way. Also, pregnancy counseling centers can be very helpful- because thats what they do- talk about pregnancy, unplanned/planned etc. But definitely tell you midwife what is going on with you- they can be the best judge at what to do next. I hope that you don't feel alone- your not. I have several friends who went through depression before and after pregnancy. Feel free to email me if you want to talk about it more.

Take good care of yourself and know that you are not alone.

Molly