Menopause - or More Specifically meno-NOT-pausing! Any Information?

Updated on May 14, 2011
S.T. asks from Huntington, NY
14 answers

I'm going to apologize at the outset for sharing too much information. I'll use as much disretion as possible in framing this question. So I'm almsot 52 and have been having perimenopausal symptoms on and off for a couple of years, but much more intensely for the last 5+ mos but intermitten - intense hot flashes for a couple of months, drenching night sweats, waking up at 4 AM and not being able to fall back aleep, lack of energy (actually exhausted when I'm normally a high energy person) - then it will go away for ao few weeks then it's all back again. Now here's the TMI part - in Dec and Jan I barely had a period - a tiny bit of spotting. Then nothing at all Feb, March and thru half of April. then the middle of April I get my monthly cycle - and I've had it ever since! It's not as heavy as it used to be when I got it regularly - it used to be VERY VERY heavy for 2 days, then light for 3-4. Now it's been constant medium flow for nearly a month! It slows down for a day and I t hink it's tapering off - then it starts up again. I've ruined a few pairs of panties, I keep buying feminine products thinking this is the last pkg I'll ever have to buy for me - then I'm back at the store buying more. I have a MD appt in 2 weeks - and I pushed for that! they weren't going to schedule me until July!!! Is this normal? My 81 yr old mom who is end stage cancer doesn't remember much about her menopausal days. Anyone?

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So What Happened?

Thank you so much ladies - I had read quite a bit so I knew much of this but was looking I guess for reassurance that it's all normal from other girls in the same season of life. It's almost a cruel joke that I have all of this going on a the same time as my mom is dying and my teenage daughter is battling depression. It's enough to send me over the edge! ;o) But I'm clinging to my anchor - God is so good.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

When I started doing something similar, my gyn said it was most likely early stages of menopause. An endometrial ablasion solved the problem.

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L.H.

answers from New York on

My gyno said some women don't reach menopause until 60! (He meant they don't fully stop their mensus til then.) I so hope I'm not in that category. Anyhow, I've been asking my doctors questions and searching the internet for answers too; because all of the women in my family are either dead or had a hsyterectomy. I'm the only one "blessed" with "healthy female parts." Still I can't wait until I stop too. It seems like forever and I've found so many misconceptions about the engima of premenopause/periomenopause/menopause...People don't realize that periomenopause can start at 36. I had the night sweats and hot flashes at 36 and was on the BC, and they didn't stop until a few years ago. I'm 48. I really didn't mind the night sweats, because I just felt that goes with it and I didn't mind the hot flashes, because I used to get those anyway when I was a teenager. I had to go off the BC 2 or 3 years ago, because I had a blood clot. Women over 36 or who smoke stand a higher risk for blood clots when on the BC pill. (So my doctors are having me go through this as natural as possible, which means tons of fruit and vegies...little/no meats/fish, except for chicken...no grapefruit...no cranberry juice...and exercise.) The part of premenopause that I'm going through now is what I really hate...Forgetfullness/brain fog, anxiety, and very painful joint pain. Went through lots of tests to figure out the joint pain and the problem is that they can't find an answer since it comes and goes and the tests come back as if there's nothing wrong! (I just want to scream!!!!!) My family doctor gave me some SolarRaze gel to use at night on which ever joint decides to hurt, so I can get some sleep. The joint pain is on and off, so you really think you're going nuts. It tires you out and makes you irritable. I've discovered some herb called Valerian, which works great for the anxiety and pain so far. (Got it really cheap at our local supermarket that sells Sun Down vitamins/sups.) Hormone test showed that I am premenopausal and really close to menopause. Can't wait!

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J.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

All I can say is this: I HEAR YA SISTER! I'm 49 with a two year old, a surprisingly happy and natural oopsie, as the ripe ol' age of 47!

I was peri meno' when I got pregnant!!! Currently, I have all the signs of the big Meno, but my Dr. say as long as aunt "Flo" comes to visit in any way shape or form I'm simply "peri". It sounds like you are "peri" as well, but I'm no Dr. I don't know which area wheat more, under my arms, under my boobs, or under my arse cheeks...lol I really lood forward to the day Aunt Flo never returns!

BTW...FYI....my Dr. says as long as a woman continues to have a cycle, no matter how infrequently, she can still get pregnant!!!

Hang in there Metro Mom of Teens! I'm usually up at 4:am as well...just know I'm suffering with you! :)

3 months away from AARP registration...with a two year old;)

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Well, I started perimenopause at 36, artifically induced by chemotherapy. I had symptoms on and off, periods on and off, several years of about 3 periods a year. I'd go almost six months and think I was done,and then SURPRISE! I think I'm actually at 7 months now and my last bloodwork, my oncologist said that my hormone levels are indicative of menopause, so perhaps I finally am done. I'm 43 now.
Good luck. With the excessive period, it is a good idea to see a doctor!

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Menopause is achieved when your period has been absent for one whole year. If you go for 11 months and then have a period, you're still pre-menopausal.
The average age for menopause is 55 (so being an average, some get to it sooner and others later) and peri-menopause (the unstable years before your period quits altogether can be a 10 year run for some women.
Prolonged bleeding can be a problem and it's important to have it checked out to rule it out as a symptom of more serious conditions.
Bleeding a lot can make you very anemic very quickly.
Sometimes going on the pill or HRT can help to regulate your hormonal fluctuations and make the hot flashes / night sweats a bit more manageable.
I'm glad you are seeing a doctor soon and I hope they can help to figure out what's going on.

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C.M.

answers from New York on

Hi S.,

Everyone's different. I had a very easy menopause at 50. But a full year later, at 51, having gone a whole year with no period, I got a little period. Turned out it was my last. So you just don't know. If you've had heavy periods all your life, it's not surprising that your menopause would be heavy, too.

"Grams"
from the Pocono Mts. of PA

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'm 50 and have barely had any perimenopausal symptoms. An occasional "warm flash" usually the week before my period, but I've had those at that time since I was in my 20s. I am on BC pills mainly for BC, but also because my GYN tells me that they could help to "even out" any symptoms.

My mother was still having regular every-other-month periods when she died in a car crash at age 58, so I could be in for a late change. And yes, you need to go for a complete 12 months without a period to be considered past menopause, and not fertile.

I would be ready to ask your Dr. a lot of questions, to be sure to know all your options. At my clinic, they told me that there is so much new information being found out about menopause that a Dr. needs to specialize in this area to keep up.

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

I think 55 is a little older than the average for menopause, I think 50 is closer to it, so you are just a little older than the average.
My mother was 55 before menopause, and she was always deathly worried that she would get pregnant!
Ironically they say the more periods you have the more risk you have for ovarian cancer, so you need to have regular ca 125 blood tests and scans, if you have been menstruating for a very long time, especially if you don't have many kids. Each time the egg leaves your ovary it bursts out of a follicle, which leaves a scar, which in turn can become malignant. This actually happened to my mother, who died for ovarian cancer 3 years after her menopause at age 58.
Towards the end of her menstruating years I remember her saying how her periods would be erratic, sometimes lasting a day, sometimes 2 weeks, and a lot were very heavy. She never had the hot flashes very badly, if at all, and her moods were constant. your MD will no doubt test your blood to see if you are menopausal!

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L.O.

answers from Albuquerque on

Bless your Heart. I am 46 years old have been having perimenopause symptoms for almost seven (7) years (I started a week after 40th b-day), but they were not that bad, until 6 months ago, then the bomb dropped. I don't have problems with bleeding, but I will have a period for a few months, then skip 7, 3 or 2 months, then I will have another normal period. But six months ago, I got such bad anxiety (at first I didn't know what was happening) that I called the ambulance and went to the hospital numerous times, thinking I was having a heart attack, then I would get depressed and even thought I was losing my mind. Then not to mention the night sweats and me waking up at 3:00 AM and not able to go back to sleep. It has been a nightmare to say the least for me and my family. To top it off I am a single Mom to a five year old Boy. I finally got on Xanax 0.3 mg, natural progesterone cream, B complex vitamins and Calcium/Magnesium and I am feeling a lot better now. I have also started eating organic food and exercising (walking). I am also trying to quit smoking, but I am down to only two cigs a day and plan on quitting completely by this Summer. Try going to an herbalist and please order the book "Taking Charge of Your Menopause" by Ann Louise Gittleman it is awesome (you will not regret this purchase) and it will give you a lot of good advice to chase all your symptoms away. Good Luck and let me know what happens. Hang in there as this too shall pass.....

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C.D.

answers from New York on

All very normal but see dr anyway not in menopausal till no period or spotting for 1 yr good luck

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J.R.

answers from Glens Falls on

I had terrible hot flashes - in fact 8 years later, I still have them - but I never missed a single period and then it just stopped like someone turned off the faucet. 11 months later, out of the blue, I had one period. My OB/GYN did the whole work up including a D&C and didn't find anything wrong. He said you can go 6 months without a period, and after that it should be considered post menopausal bleeding and investigated. It never happened again and I tell you what - I don't miss it!

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J.K.

answers from New York on

I just started getting this past year, 44-45yr. Simple it Sucks! Night sweats on and off the worst to deal with, lack of sleep, etc. I am working with ACCupuncture, its been much better, she put me on MacHarmony pill for menopause. All natural. Try it.

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B.E.

answers from New York on

Everyone is soooo different. My gyn told me 52 was the average age, and I was way past that and going strong. He was concerned, and I thought, why? All those hormones are still working at keeping my skin supple and youthful. And then, without a fuss, my period just stopped. No night sweats, no hot flashes. My mother also reported not having much in the way of hot flashes. Just like every pregnancy is unique, I guess this aspect of womanhood is unique unto each of us. I do feel for the women who suffer; at least today there are options and more is known about menopause than in the previous generation. Talking to your doctor and seeing what tests or meds (s)he recommends is the best advice.

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