Math Phobia in 10 Year Old

Updated on July 22, 2012
V.P. asks from Columbus, OH
14 answers

Any advice for dealing with math phobia in my 10 and 8 year olds? My daughter started hating math when it came time to memorize math facts. Her brother has listened to her complain about math and now he claims he hates it as well. The fact is, he is actually very good at math, but the minute the subject comes up he whines and complains. She's not as strong as he is, but she's not bad either, but I can't convince either of them that their attitude is what's standing in their way most of all. I've looked into a couple of things at the library, but haven't found anything to really help or inspire. Anyone else going through this?

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So What Happened?

Great suggestions -- unfortunately, I've tried a ton of computer games -- the school even had one that the whole school did and the kids could win prizes on. They were not motivated by it. I did offer them five cents a problem while we were on vacation to earn souvenir money -- it worked for my daughter -- she earned $24, but my son was not moved at all. You've mentioned some computer games I haven't encountered, so I'll look into them -- keep the suggestions coming!!!

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S.R.

answers from Washington DC on

We are doing a program called Kumon. It can be a little pricey, but they teach through repetition. It's good because they do math every day and they get real good at it. They have them memorize addition, subtraction and multiplication

You might also try Phil Snyder, the numbears multiply songs. They work great. I made a cd for the car and my dd learned everything without even trying.

5 moms found this helpful

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Try something completely different.

My son was a total numbers guy. 1 'bad' year, and it took 6mo to figure out how to work around it.

For us, it was ClieFinders. A cheap $10 computer game! A storyline fun way to be memorizing facts without ever having to 'drill'.

6 moms found this helpful
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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Do your kids like to play on the computer? I don't let my son play usually, but as a reward, I let him play on the free website Sumdog. It has math-based games to play. It was recommended by my son's elementary teacher. HIs teacher also recommends getting and playing the cardgame 24 with kids. It's a fun way to practice math skills.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

I saw this on tv. 20/20 or such did an expose and was impressed. I've considered several times getting this because at 5th grade, my son still struggles with multiplication that they've been working on for 2 years.

https://www.brainetics.com/

My first suggestion to you tho, is to get your kid's eyes checked by a professional. (not a pediatrician).

In December 2011 the teacher mentioned my son's math problem during a conference. Don't we LOVE those! We had known it was a problem because he would take forever on his homework, but we didn't really understand how it was affecting his classwork. The teacher asked us to try and work with him more at home. We started giving him multiplication test every few weeks. Where you write 0 - 12 across the top and 0 -12 down the side and then set a timer for 5 minutes. The child has to fill in the table as much as possible in those 5 minutes. He would only finish about half of the table. Each week he would only get a few more done. Each time I think about it I come back to the brainetics. I haven't purchased it becuase I don't have $150+ dollars to spare.

One thing that did happen was that I got my kid's eyes checked at the beginning of May 2012. Turns out my 5y has a lazy eye and needs bifocals! My 11y basically can't see out of one eye and has monovision. I had NO IDEA! So we got them both glasses. They came in right before Memorial Day. So 3 weeks left in school. In those three weeks, my son started FLYING through ALL of his homework, including math and writing assignments. The most lasting impression was that last week of school. He came home with a big smile on his face.
Kid:Mom. We did a multiplication test in school today, I got an A!
Me: Really? (He hands me the test, completely finished.) How long did it take you?
Kid: 3 minutes. :)
Me: Get out. You did not!
Kid: Yep :D

I started crying. I felt so bad. If all these improvements all happened in 3 weeks, what could've been overthe last 2 years? All the stress, all the hours. If only I'd realized. My kid just looked at me, it's okay Mom, I didn't know either and they're my eyes.

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

Added: Per your SWH. Okay, here's another thought.

Years ago when my kids watched a show that featured a dog and his boy, in which the dog "talked" as the narrator, (maybe somebody can remind me of the name of the show), the boy couldn't seem to do his math without his calculator. And he was doing poorly in class. He didn't understand the math concepts and was using the calculator as a crutch.

The neighbor saw what was happening, and hired him to work at her yard sale. She sat him down at the table and told him that she would give him 10% of all the sales. If my memory is right, he was to give people a 5% discount if they bought over a certain dollar amount as well. He was excited, but realized that he didn't have his calculator. She told him that he had to do without it. He struggled at first, but by the end of the day, he was doing the math right. (No one was going to let him "wing it" about their discount! And he couldn't stand to wait til the end to see how much money he was making.)

After it was all done, she talked to him about understanding concepts instead of relying on his calculator, and how doing something that really USED the math would teach him how to do it. It's kind of like giving a 15% tip when you go out to a restaurant.

I loved that show - it wasn't just about math, but about history and science, etc.

The point is, find some real life ways to use math. Do "field trips" where you measure things, figure out word problem stuff in real life, etc. And I really mean it when I say, don't allow them to down themselves out loud about their math skills. They are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy if allowed to.

Lastly, do you allow them to play other computer games or Xbox or gameboy? If you do, put a moratorium on that. Tell them that either they do the computer math games, or they do nothing. They have to earn electronic time by doing the math games and not complaining. You hold the reins to this, V.. USE THEM!

Original:
Try a computer program (CD) that teaches math through fun interaction. (Dorling Kindersley - DK - is a great start.)

My kids did several of those programs. One of them had them looking for treasure and they were absolutely hooked on it. They did one that taught grammar too.

If I were you, I'd say everytime you hear it come out of their mouths "I don't want to hear it. If you complain again, you're going to clean the toilet" and then show them that you mean it. Either they'll stop saying it, or you'll have a clean toilet!

Dawn

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Declare a 'no whine' zone when it comes to math.
Tell them whining doesn't change anything and if they are having a problem they need to face it and practice other ways to get around and solve the difficulty.
Find them a math site or other game that helps them drill the skills and for every whine you hear - add another 10 minutes practice on it.
Every single whine means "I need MORE practice" - and so, they practice till they get it down good.
When the attitude bothers you - you just out attitude them.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

Part of the math curriculum we use at school is designated computer time with math games to help the children learn basic facts so they are quicker with it. One of the more popular games is FasttMath and there are several others that the children love. They start these computer games in K.

Math is SO important. You can also incorporate the math at home. They can help you cook, measure, etc. At the grocery store they can help with weighing produce, etc. Make it a game.

Have you looked into a tutor? MANY teachers tutor on the side, even during summer. The starting rate for an academic tutor around her is $50/hr and WELL worth it.

Your school's guidance counselor can lead you to good tutors who tutor withing the district. You need to find someone with a good "fit" for your children.

Also, our district prefers not to use the tutor in a box places (Sylvan, Kumon, etc) because they are in business to make money and not necessarily have your child in 100% interest other than to bring in revenue. Of course, some tutors there are good but they do look at the bottome line.

Plus, your child should be taught the way they teach at your school because if they learn one way from a tutor and another way from the teachers, then they are royally confused.

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L.M.

answers from Cleveland on

yeah, my 9 yo son, his little sister is a math whiz and only 18 months younger so i think instead of choosing to compete with her and come out bad, he wants to just give up.

i get so frustrated because i also struggle with math. really bad, i was so embarrassed I know my dd is 46 inches tall and was trying to convert that to feet and just could not figure it out. I know there are 12 inches in a foot but to count by 12s or even add on by 12's when i was on the spot feeling the pressure just made me freeze up, so my son does not have the best example, nor do i feel very confident helping him.

things my Dd loves are playing math computer games, you can just google them or ask their teacher for recommendations, We also have a Jumpstart Wii program that you have to solve probelms to complete the adventure,-he refuses to play it.
Just being able to count by 10s, 5's, 2's and then 3, 4, 6, 7, 8 s etc is such a super great foundation. Montessori elementary programs have colored beads that kids count to reinforce this and it's really need to see them concretely grasp this cocept.
playing store or going to the real store and having to count out their money and figure out change is good math practice that might motivate your kids, Or like my son he might just toss the whole wrinkled up wad on the convyor belt with his pokemon and make the suprised clerk count it out.

also our school makes the kids do basic math facts drills every day, you could just do that with a paper and pencil, and have them earn an incentive for practicing --bribing isn't great but maybe as they gain confidence they will feel better.

honestly the real answer is that you and i both should probably find a child psycologoist that deals with these matters, but i know i'm not goign to do that at this point. hypnotism???

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M.O.

answers from New York on

I know a little girl who had such a math phobia she had to transfer schools -- her whole academic performance was unraveling on account of math. Her new school recommended that she join the math club. I don't know how her parents managed to get her to go the first day, but it worked amazingly well. She made friends with all the math whizzes and was acing math w/in 6 months. She's now on an honor's math track in jr. high.

I should mention that this school (the one she transferred to) made a really strong push to get girls into math and science clubs. So when she started, she was surrounded by girls who were good at math but didn't think they were, or didn't think they should be in the math club or something. It was a natural friendship group for her.

With girls especially, I recommend making math social somehow. I'm pretty sure this girl was 9 when she switched schools.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I pointed out to my GD that she is able to memorize words to songs she likes, so she is capable of memorizing her math facts. She never really thought about it that way. That gave her encouragement that she could do it.

Then, the ones she had trouble with, we tried to make up a one or two line song or ditty about to help her remember.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

We used to play store with her toys, or the can goods, cereal boxes..

She would be the store owner and put prices on things. (dot stickers) then I would go shopping at her store.. She would add up the totals and I would use play money to pay her.. She would add it all up.. and then figure out the change..

If we were going to the movies. I would call out the prices for the tickets, Adult, child. the snacks.. and have her add it up, then we would decide how much money to get from the ATM..

I would have her write out my grocery list based on the prices for the dales on Wed.. Then I would have her help me figure out what was a good deal.

There are lots of fun work books also at book stores, or teacher stores.

I have also found having an older child.. works a lot better than a parent trying to tutor their children. When Our daughter was in middle school, she used to help some children do work pages from work books..

Kumon has been mentioned and I will tell you, they are excellent. Our daughter had a classmate, that would just shut down with math in elementary school. She and her brother attended Kumon for a few years.. She finally gained her confidence. She is now in Medical school!!!!

S.L.

answers from New York on

I told my 7 yr old that when I was little, I didnt like math because it was hard for me, then my parents started to help me practice at home, then I got better at it (all true), and started to like math (not so true). I'm giving him math books that review last yrs math so he gets more confident. He's easier because he's younger. He found a game he likes at Fun4 brain.

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L.S.

answers from San Diego on

My take on this is the way some teachers teach math to students today. It is all done by rote memory rather than a practical understanding of it using either fun games or fun math examples. Some kids see it a drudgery which I don't blame them. When kids see the application of math in the real world then they start viewing it as fun. Yes you could do computer games but you should also do fun stuff with them as well using math as a concept. Fractions, next time you have pizza, play a math dice game (they sell this at most stores, we found ours in Target). Do some fun experiments. Just some ideas. Good luck!

C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

This started to happen with my older daughter when she was 7, I remember. She didn't want to memorize her math facts. I dealt with it pretty much the same way I deal with everything - head on, and like a locomotive. We are one of those "failure is not an option" households, where we refer to B's as "Asian F's" (from the Glee episode, if you watch that ;). Anyway, I told her that I didn't really care what she thought about math, bottom line, she had to memorize her math facts.

I pointed out that math is a lot like a game. When you are little, you spend a few years learning the rules of the game (addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division). Then you learn how to play the game (fractions, decimals, order of operations). Then you master the game (algebra, geometry, and even chemistry and physics). Nobody ever just starts playing a game without knowing the rules - therefore, you have to learn the rules! We all play this game every day of our lives, whether we use it to balance the checkbook, pay bills, make an Excel spreadsheet at work, run a business, etc. Therefore, failure to learn math is just not an option. It really doesn't matter if she likes it or wants to, or whatever, she just has to. My kids finally decided that if they didn't want to spend all of their after-homework time doing flash cards with me, rather than outside playing, then they'd better just memorize their facts already! And so they did.

Also, here's something else you might try. If you spend any time sitting in traffic at all (as we do on a daily basis around here), spend that time working on school subjects. We drilled math for a good year or so while we sat in traffic. We had "math bees" where I'd give them a problem (either something like 9+4, or a word problem) and whoever said the answer first got a point. First person to 50 (or 100, if traffic is REALLY bad) wins. As a bonus, my younger daughter has all her multiplication facts memorized going into 3rd grade because her older sister had to learn them first. :) Now we are working on states and capitals while we drive in the car...

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