Mastitis/ Clooged Milk Duct HELP!

Updated on May 08, 2009
A.S. asks from Oviedo, FL
28 answers

My son is almost 4 weeks old and the other morning I woke up and felt like I could hardly move! My right breast was so extremely sore all the way up under my arm and down my entire breast. I have been doing both breast and pumping and since I was in so much pain i tryed to go ahead and pump and the pain was so unbelievable! I usually get more from my right breast (2 1/2-3oz) and now only able to get 1 oz with extreme pain. I called my ob and they called me in an antibiotic and told me to just keep pumping. I started the antibiotic Sunday night, have been taking hot showers, hot compresses, pain meds ok'd by ob/gyn and pumping that breast every 2 hrs. Even during the night I am setting my alarm and waking up to pump. Yesterday morning I woke up with clear blistes on the tip of my nipple. I went ahead and popped the blisters with a sterile needle but it has not helped. It seems like the skin on the tip on my nipple is now closed up preventing the milk from coming out. I do not want to stop breastfeeding. The pain is so extreme but if I know that it will eventually go away and that I won't have to stop breastfeeding anyways, then I will endure the pain. Please let me know of any home remedies that may help. I have tryed iced cabbage leaves but no change.

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T.M.

answers from Melbourne on

A., I would suggest that you see a lactation consultant right away. I don't know where you live, but here in Brevard County there is at least one on staff at every hospital. There is also one at every Health Department office, employed by WIC. You seem very committed to breastfeeding and have done a great job so far. I'm sure an IBCLC will be able to help.

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V.

answers from Boca Raton on

Hi, A.
sorry... I feel your pain, I had the same with fever.
Showers doesn't help.
take a white cabbage, wash leaves in cold boiled water and put around your breast under the bra, change it every 3 hours until breast will be soft. Will take 2-3 days, and keep breastfeeding.

this advice i got from lactating consulting by phone and it helped me.
there is her phone: Maria - ###-###-####

FEEL BETTER!!!
keep me posted.
And CONGRATS on baby boy!!!
feel free to call me any time
###-###-####
Sincerely,
V..

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C.B.

answers from New York on

A.,
I've never had mastitis, but with each of my 3 children, I've had more than my share of plugged ducts. I, too, had the blisters you described and yes, I tried popping them but made the situation worse by doing so. You need to nurse your baby as often as possible to relieve the pressure. When you have a plugged duct, ALWAYS nurse your baby on the affected breast FIRST so that the baby's strong sucking will release the plug. Massage your breast above, below, and all around the area where you feel the "lump." Also, massage the lump even though it will hurt. When I say massage, I don't mean lightly rub. Apply firm (deep) pressure and the baby should be able to release it. IF after a nursing session your baby did not release it, hop into a hot steamy shower and allow the hot water (as hot as you can take it) to hit the affected breast. After the shower, nurse your baby on the breast again and you may want to pump the other side in between nursing sessions. I also found that changing the position which you hold and nurse your baby when you have a plug is essential. If you typically cradle hold your baby, switch to lying down and/or a football hold. Each position you hold your baby will apply different pressure to different ducts in your breasts. I know how painful a plug is. I got them frequently with all 3 of my children and it seems that once you get one, you seem prone to them again. It's important to vary the positions which you nurse your baby and make certain your bra isn't too tight as this can contribute to plugs. Good luck to you.

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A.N.

answers from Jacksonville on

Have you checked the baby's mouth to see if there are white spots that won't come off when you brush your finger over them? There may also be a yeast infection. Just a guess. I'm so sorry about your pain. I hope it goes away quickly. Drink a LOT of water!

Good luck!

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H.R.

answers from Miami on

Go to kellymom.com, you may be pumping too much, and see Ana at lovingstartlacationservices.com (Lacation consultant in Pembroke Pines, she is great).

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S.H.

answers from Melbourne on

A.,

I am so sorry about this pain you are feeling. For the mastitis, the best thing is to keep breastfeeding from that side... pump the other. Use your heating pad too. If your nipples are blistering or scabbing over and it is painful for your baby to nurse, using a nipple sheild. It will help let that heal while still being able to breastfeed by cutting back on the friction directly on your nipple from the baby sucking. Use breast cream too.
Don't give up. Breastfeeding is very hard in the begining (but so worth it... great for your baby and saves you so much $ and time) and adding mastitis to it is even worse. One of the good things you can take away from this is the ability to recongnize the early signs of it next time and you can get it under control before it gets too bad.

I certainly hope you feel better soon.
S.

P.S. For those ladies who don't know, if you are breastfeeding and get a massage, you can get mastitis from the toxins that are being released and cleansed from the body. This is from personal experience, unfortunately.

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C.B.

answers from Boca Raton on

I would go see the doctor and see what they say. However, to prevent it from happening again you can take Lecithin. It is an inexpensive supplement that you can get many places. It is a fat emulsifier and helps keep the ducts flowing. That is what a Lactation Consultant told me. I hope you feel better. If you stop breastfeeding it will be worse.
You have to wean.

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H.P.

answers from Orlando on

Oh I am so sorry!! I have heard mastitis is so very painful. I got a clogged duct when my son was 7 mos old & it hurt! I have heard that mastitis is so much worse.
I would call a lactation consultant. They are super knowledgeable when it comes to this kind of stuff. OB's are great, but not necesarily for mastitis, other than throwing an antibiotic at you.
My OB told me to massage the area of my boob where the clog was when my son nursed. It eventually worked, only took about 24 hrs. At the time, that seemed like an eternity.
Not sure where you are located. I am in the Orlando area & when I had issues bf'ing when my son was first born, I called Florida Hospital, Altamonte & they were a God-send. They are in the business of helping women with bf'ing.
Good luck! I hope you get some relief soon.
H.

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B.R.

answers from Gainesville on

Dear A.,
Hang in there! I, too, had clogged milk breasts for more than one of our 4 sons I breastfed. Have you called La Leche League? Mothers there may be a wonderful help. Also the most important thing will be to breastfeed with the baby, not the pump. It's wonderful that you can pump with a machine; when I tried it it, it gave me nothing but trouble.
As a last resort, how about your husband helping out? When our third son had to be off breast milk for a day to clear up a bad GI problem, my breasts had filled and I sat there staring at the pump I was very reluctant to use. My wonderful husband said, "don't. I'll take care of it" and he did. He thought the milk wasn't all that bad! And after a late night and next morning emptying, I made it through the 24 hrs. and welcomed the baby back that afternoon.
So get that baby and let him at the sorer breast, just don't neglect the other one. And the best of luck to you!
B. Ryerson Gainesville, FL

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T.H.

answers from Daytona Beach on

it sounds like you need to call the dr back an let them know this issue has gone further maybe they can give you a topical cream or ointment for your nipple
i have used stuff called udderly smooth yes its an udder cream
you do have to wash it off before each pumping or feeding
i dont know if you thought of lookin up a solution on webmd.com
but heres what they say

Mastitis While Breast-Feeding - Home Treatment
From the time you begin breast-feeding until your baby is weaned, take measures to prevent mastitis. For example, learn about different breast-feeding techniques so that you will know how to completely empty your breasts. Not emptying your breasts completely when nursing or going too long between feedings may lead to mastitis.

If you have symptoms of mastitis, you may need to call your doctor right away. Delaying treatment can lead to an abscess forming in the affected breast. Severe infection can require intravenous antibiotics in the hospital.

Breast-feeding with mastitis
Along with oral antibiotic treatment, continuing to nurse your baby and being careful to empty your breasts completely will help shorten the duration of the infection.

You can safely continue breast-feeding your baby or pumping breast milk to feed your baby during illness and treatment.3 Your baby is the most efficient pump you have for emptying your breasts. Your breast milk is safe for your baby to drink because any bacteria in your milk will be destroyed by the baby's digestive juices.

Before breast-feeding your baby, place a warm, wet washcloth over the affected breast for about 15 minutes. Try this at least 3 times a day. This increases milk flow in the breast. Massaging the affected breast may also increase milk flow.
If possible, continue breast-feeding on both sides. Ideally, start on the affected side-it's critical that you empty this breast thoroughly. If this breast is too painful to start with, try feeding from the healthy breast first. Then, after your milk is flowing, breast-feed from the affected breast until it feels soft. Switch back to the healthy breast and breast-feed until your baby has finished.
Pump or express milk from the affected breast if pain prevents you from breast-feeding. Nipple pain can be caused by the baby latching on to sore nipples. For more information on pumping or expressing breast milk, see the topic Breast-Feeding.
A lanolin-based cream, such as Lansinoh, may help heal sore or cracked nipples.
If you use nursing pads, replace them frequently so they are dry and clean.
Self-care measures for mastitis
In addition to taking your prescribed antibiotics and continuing to breast-feed or pump breast milk, there are other steps you can take to make yourself feel better until the mastitis goes away.

Take acetaminophen (such as Tylenol) to relieve your pain or discomfort. You can take ibuprofen (such as Advil) along with acetaminophen to reduce inflammation if necessary.
Rest as much as possible.
Apply an ice pack or a warm compress to the affected breast to help reduce your pain. If you use an ice pack, place the ice outside of your bra or clothing. Do not put the ice directly on your bare skin.
Drink extra fluids.
If your breasts are very full (engorged), pump or express a small amount of breast milk before breast-feeding. This will make your breasts less full and may make it easier for your baby to latch on to your breast.
If pus is draining from your infected breast, wash the nipple gently and let it air dry before putting your bra back on. A disposable breast pad placed in the bra cup may absorb the drainage.
Most women can successfully continue breast-feeding during a breast infection. If mastitis makes it difficult for you to continue breast-feeding while the infection is being treated, remember that emptying your breasts regularly is essential. Don't hesitate to talk to your health professional or a lactation consultant for further help and support.

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V.S.

answers from Dallas on

The WORST thing you could do is take a hot shower...heat only increases the swelling of the tissue in the breast. Take cool showers and do not let the drops hit your breast (face away from the shower head). If you have blisters, you may want to call in an appointment or you could also have thrush.

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L.P.

answers from Port St. Lucie on

I had mastitis when my daughter was 5 months old. My Dr gave me a prescription for penicillin for 7 days. I started to feel better after 2 days of taking the meds. I also had a blister on the same nipple. It still hurt after the penicillin was gone. I changed the position of my daughter when I nursed her on that breast from the football hold to the traditional hold and that finally helped the blister and pain to go away after about a month. I didn't pump, I just kept breastfeeding my daughter 6-8 times a days. I also limited breastfeeding to about 5 minutes on the breast that hurt so that it could have a break and try to heal. I didn't want to give up breastfeeding either. So I worked thru the pain and she's now 9 months old and still breastfeeding. I haven't had mastitis or blisters since. Just keep trying to breastfeed and you'll make it through. Once you are finished with your prescription, you should feel better. If you don't, you should definitely call your Dr again.

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S.L.

answers from Boca Raton on

Hey A., I had the same thing and i feel your pain!!! Just keep that heat on, and don't use CABBAGE!!! That will stop your milk production. I used a heating pad in between pumping or nursing. I know it hurts but keep massaging and pumping and you will be fine in a couple days. You might want to call your doctor and show her how you are nursing, it could be that your baby might be latching on incorrectly, I found out that my son had tongue tie after my 3rd infection and wasn't latching on my right breast correctly but was more comfortable on my left. It might not be either it could be from the pumping too, my doctors told me that pumping can cause it also. Something so natural that causes so many problems!! lol Also if you baby finishes nursing try taking the pump and pump more just in case the baby didn't empty out the breast or take a hot shower and let them hang in the warm water to move that milk through the ducts. I hope this helps a bit and pray for you to feel better soon, DONT GIVE UP!!!
S. mom to 5 amazing children, 17yrs,9yrs,7years,3yrs and 18 months, check out my son's journey at www.liamlockhart.com

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J.S.

answers from Miami on

I breastfed my son, in addition to formula because I never really produced that much milk, sadly.....and he had bad jaundice. The only way for a baby to get better from that, besides lying naked on a light-infused blanket is to poop & pee as much as possible, so we had to feed him ALOT. I didn't have enough milk & the dr.', said to use formula. SO I did. And I gave him a paci, to help him suck.
And he never got nipple-confusion - not once. He never had skin problems - not a blemish. And we bonded like I didn't think was every possible to bond to another human -I am his world, and vice-versa. And I never got Mastitis-but I did get thrush 3x from anti-biotics from dental surgery.
And people who mean well but tell you that this or that will happen if you don't breast feed all the time, through everything, no matter what...those people are not you, they don't know you or your family & it is NOT ok to threaten a new mother with dire words about her baby if she doesn't BF "the rigth way". be very very very careful of La Leche.
Be strong.
go with your gut - and Listen to it, and your baby's "voice". They have one, at 4 wks
good luck & don't forget - enjoy this time...treasure it

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B.K.

answers from Tallahassee on

Keep a big bottle of water, at least a quart by the bed and drink it. Get help. Usually newer Moms who haven't leanred to really ask for help are prone to mastitis. could this be you? Lay in bed and rest as much as possible.

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C.W.

answers from Miami on

this happened to me, the bestfor me was to stay in bed and rest, call someone over to help with the house kids whatever, call in sick and stay in bed. i didnt pump but had my baby breastfeed constantly, a day or two later it was better.
i am pasting the info my midwife gave me that will hopefully be of help.
The first step in treating the infection is bed-rest for several days.

Wear a comfortable and well fitted nursing bra.

Move and remove your milk by feeding your baby frequently to avoid milk stasis. Position your baby with his chin pointed towards the affected area. Nurse as long as the baby desires. If your breast still feels full after the baby has finished, hand express the milk for relief. Remember that your baby is the best breast pump.

Start each feeding on the affected breast. As painful as it may be at first, breastfeeding through a breast infection is essential--if you stop, you'll get engorged and only aggravate the problem.

Apply cabbage leaves in between feeds.

Drink water, 6-8 oz of water every waking hour.

Moist hot compresses applied to breast four times daily for 20 minutes

You can use any of the following as an infusion: Ginger Root, Chamomile, Marshmallow Root,

Burdock Root, Slippery Elm.

Grated, raw potato poultices 2-3 times daily for 20 minutes

Here are some natural remedies that can be tried:

Echinacea tincture 1 dropper every 2-4 hours daily until 2 days after discomfort is gone

Propolis tincture 10-15 drops 2 times daily (can be mixed with Echinacea)

Vitamin C 500 mg every 3 hours for 5 days (will make baby’s stool loose don’t worry)

If you have a fever drink hot Elder Blossom and Spearmint Infusion (1/2 ounce of each herb) steep 20 minutes in 1 quart boiling water. Drink until a sweat is broken; up to two quarts.

It is safe and recommended to take an anti-inflammatory medicine to relieve the pain.

See your caregiver if your symptoms don't improve within 12 to 24 hours of applying moist heat to your breasts, feeding your baby more frequently, and taking ibuprofen to ease the pain. She'll prescribe antibiotics, bed rest, pain relievers, and hot compresses. When the antibiotics kick in during the next 48 hours, you'll start feeling better. Continue taking the antibiotics until they are finished.

How do I prevent it?

Make sure your baby is positioned well and latches on to as much breast tissue as possible and vary your nursing positions.

To avoid cracks, make sure your baby is latched-on correctly at each feed.

Always treat a plugged milk duct immediately to prevent an infection

Rest! Mastitis is a sign that you are doing too much too soon.

Wear comfortable, non-constricting nursing bras and clothing. Under wire bras are not recommended for nursing mothers as the under wire presses into the ductile system. Anything that restricts the flow of milk can lead to an inflamed or plugged duct.

Avoid putting unnecessary pressure on your breasts. Heavy bags with shoulder straps can compress the breast and lead to a plugged duct; so can tight bathing suits - even holding the breast tightly while you nurse can cause problems.

Nurse regularly, and try not to give supplementary bottles or use a pacifier during the early weeks of breast-feeding. If your baby skips a feeding, takes a bottle or falls asleep with a pacifier instead of nursing, you may become engorged.

Drink lots of fluids. Dehydration can increase the severity of infections.

If you experience extreme nipple soreness or burning and find white spots on your nipples or in your baby's mouth, you may have a thrush infection. Contact your care provider or a lactation professional immediately.

Wipe your nipples with warm water after each nursing; this will prevent milk from drying on the nipple and clogging the milk ducts.

Is your baby sleeping longer stretches and feeding less often? This could lead to engorgement and possibly mastitis.

Are you limiting time at the breast, leading to shorter feedings? Have you started to give supplementary bottles or a pacifier to your baby? Has your baby's nursing pattern changed abruptly because of teething, a cold, or your own schedule? If you notice a feeling of fullness in your breast when you're not nursing, try to release it--by nursing, pumping, or hand expressing, or by taking a hot shower or bath--to avoid discomfort and possible engorgement.

If you get mastitis more than once, you may not have fully recovered from your first infection, or you may be too fatigued and stressed. Remember to take it easy.

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D.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

Hi A.- I have absolutely no experience with what you are talking about, but I wanted to let you what I was thinking.

I admire your strength to keep trying with your baby. If you have to give it up, remember that not breastfeeding will not effect your bonding to your baby and, although breast is better, you baby will be healthy and OK if he gets formula. Be strong, but be kind to yourself too. If you are stressed and in pain every time you go to feed your son, you can't be giving your baby much good energy. I hope all works out for you, whichever way it goes. Much luck!!

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I.Y.

answers from Gainesville on

Sorry I have no experience in this. But would recommend making a Drs. appointment. i have never heard of blisters forming due to mastitis. You might have a more severe form. Please make an appt. The sooner the better.

S.T.

answers from Orlando on

Hi A.,

I'm sorry to hear you're going through that. My daughter is 2, but I went through something similar when she was about 3 months old. I had all the symptoms of mastitis (including red streaky marks on that breast, which was hot to the touch) except fever. I had been able to pump around 4 oz. on my right side and was down to like 1/2 oz., and had an excruciating ping-pong-ball-sized rock-hard lump which would have scared the heck out of me if I hadn't been breastfeeding. The antibiotic should help, as should tylenol......my doctor (and everything I've read) said to use warm, not cold compresses, which helps to soften up the clot and relax you - warm washclothes, hot baths, etc. You're probably getting blisters from pumping so much. Do you use lanolin? Or people also saying that expressing a tiny bit of milk and rubbing it on the nipple when you're done nursing or pumping is also soothing. Lastly, are you nursing on that breast, or only pumping? Pumping simply is not as effective in terms of stimulating milk let-down as nursing.....I know it will frustrate your baby, but you've got to get him to nurse on that side. It's also important that you try to relax before nursing or pumping, because anxiety (of course, including anxiety about not having any milk)interferes with milk let-down. You can try deep breathing, listening to music....I've heard some people even recommend having a small glass of wine before pumping. Maybe you're OB should actually see you to get a sense of the severity of the situation rather than just calling in a prescription? Just a thought.

Good luck.....I hope this helps and that you're back to normal soon!

S.

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L.H.

answers from Miami on

call la leche league
call local lactation consultant
get help
do not quit
stop pumping so much-baby is WAY more efficient than any pump!
the blister is called a BLEB (sounds funny)
google it
and GO get help!
good luck! you will make it! I had same thing

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C.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

A.,
I lived with mastitis for 6 months...it was horrible! For some reason it just kept returning. I would never take the antibiotic b/c that is a sure way to develop an overgrowth of yeast and give it to the baby. Every month I would get it and get a high fever as well and I would just nurse through it until it cleared. I will tell you that the stress of it or stress in general won't help so if you can get help you should stay in bed, rest and feed (not so much pump)

I am in school for holistic nutrition and have studied alternative med for a few yrs now. I wish I knew then what I know now.

I don't think an antibiotic is always the answer, but it is all the Drs have to offer. Because you are taking the antibiotic you NEED a probiotic. You are killing all the good healthy micro flora in you baby's inner ecosystem and yours and you need to replace that. Go to www.bodyecolgy.com and order her cocobiotic. Take it every day and you can let the baby suck some off your fingers. It is safe for babies and will help establish a healthy digestive system and hopefully eliminate thrush.

Carly seemed to have some good advice, and a lactation consultant should lok at you, but I would seek out a homeopath, an acupuncturist, or DOM. Oriental Medicine is all about releasing stagnant energy flow and blockages. I can give you the number of a homeopath that does phone consults and is great, I don't know if she can treat this, but you can ask her and discuss $$ before you do it. As far as an acupuncturist or DOM you would have to do some research in your area.

It is very important that you eat healthy whole foods, free of sugars and white flour products, nothing processed, lots of clean water, eat large amounts of veggies especially greens, and eat probiotic foods or take the cocobiotic immediately and continue it for a few months. If you have Whole Foods near you I can give you a list of cultured foods they carry, but start the probiotic right away.

Healthy blessings,
C. Soave M.S.Ed
Certified LEAN Coach
Wellness Educator
____@____.com

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J.M.

answers from San Juan on

I had mastitis as well when my daugter was a newborn on both breasts, the pain was un-believable and i was also given an anti-biotic and was allowed to nurse and pump also. I know the pain is horrible, but it does go away! I was told to nurse more from sore breast to get it going. Keep going with the hot showers and expressing in there and hot compressess too. Do you have lanolin to put on your sore nipples? That really helps too.

With my first born, who is now 6 I had scabs, blisters and he was drinking red-milk but we got through it.

One place you might look on-line is the American Academy of Pediatrics. They have a book that was like an instruction book for raising kids and everything that goes with it, birth to age 5. I loved it!

I just moved here to Ceiba, from South Carolina. I have a 2yo daughter and a 6 yo son.
I hope this helps!

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E.D.

answers from Greensboro on

A.,
Just wondering how things turned out for you...I had the same thing happen to me and my final outcome wasn't good...I had to have surgery to remove a breast abscess!!! Very horrible recovery....I hope you had better luck than I. I was, however, able to go back and nurse (the doctors told me to forget about nursing the baby, he is 9 months old now and that was 7 months ago). I do remember that it felt better when the baby nursed rather than pumping...

Well, just being nosy and hoping you did better than I but that you definitely were able to continue nursing your baby!
:) E.

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D.P.

answers from Miami on

Dear A.,

I's time for another opinion, how can your dr tell you to continue pumping when it's causing you so much pain? Pain was designed by GOD to alert us that something is very wrong.

Please try MD.com and for the children pediatrics.com.

I did not breast feed my son and he graduated from the Academy of West Point. I know breast feeding is healthier for babies, but not at the price your paying A..

God bless you and yours,

D. P.

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C.W.

answers from Tallahassee on

try a home remedy ( fill a sock with uncooked rice heat in the mirowave until warm (make sure it is really warm almost hot to releive the swelling. Also try taking a really warm bath and soaking your breasts for a while. Or try a heating pad. You should moisturize between feedings so your nipples won't get chapped. I personaly tried breast feeding and it did not work the pain never seemed to go away and always got worse so i quit.Makes you wonder how did they do it back in the day right?

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R.C.

answers from Orlando on

Hi A..

I am sorry to hear of your pain right now. I experienced a bad clogged duct about the same time as you did. I actually took the advice of a lactation consultant and tried various positions with my little boy to get him to latch on a different way, cleaning out the clog. I played around with feedings and started on the clogged breast first so that he might be a little more agressive at the start of a feeding. It was pretty amazing to see him face up stretching up my legs to latch on, but it did the trick. I felt better right away and the rest of the soreness disappeared in a couple of more days. I hope this helps. - R.

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B.W.

answers from Melbourne on

This may sound strange - but put a cold cabbage leaf in your arm pit. It helps!

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A.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

I am so sorry you are having such a horrible painful time. I remember having the same issue with my first baby. Although it's painful, you have to keep nursing. I would nurse the baby on that side and pump on the good side. The baby is a better pump. The blisters are probably from the pump not being hooked up correctly or over pumping in an effort to relieve your discomfort. I would take frequent hot baths and massage the breast as much as you can stand. Keep warm moist compress on the nipple to prevent the nipple from becoming clogged. Express some milk and let the milk sit on the nipple, like a cream or lotion. It has properties that will help keep the area soft. The ice cabbage leaves do help reduce inflammation. Ask your doc if you can take 800mg of ibuprofen. I remember being told that was fine for me and baby. It will help with pain and reduce inflammation. Eat oatmeal and drink TONS of water to help with keeping your milk supply up. The stress can cause you to reduce your supply and being well hydrated will aid in healing. Keep at it, you will get over it and will have months and months of pleasurable nursing. Another thing to consider is if you have a yeast infection in your breast. Does it burn when your milk lets down? Does it seem to hurt more when baby nurses, does baby have white patches on his tongue? I would request diflucan just in case. It's just a pill you take. Wash your bras and pajamas every time you use them, change breast pads often. You can keep recontaminating yourself it you reuse anything that touches your breast. Eat yogurt to help level out your yeast levels, the antibiotics will also possibly give you a vaginal yeast infection, so diflucan is warranted either way. Seek out a La Leche League consultant. The ladies are more than happy to call and talk to you. It helps to talk to a professional who wants to help. Keep at it, you will get through it.

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