Kindergarten Transition...

You have gotten some good suggestions. I has a rough time in K too. I was the youngest kid in the class and it took months for me to adjust. Just do what you can to help him feel supported. He has to go to school sometime (unless you want to homeschool permanently). If he has a really rough time you can have him repeat K if you have too. I sent my son to preschool so he would be more ready for K, unlike me. He starts in a few weeks.

Please thank your husband for his services and sacrifices to our country...very much appreciated!!!

He is picking on your stress and playing on it...it's called manipulation. Instead of fretting over this - be HAPPY!!! BE EXCITED!!! He's starting a new thing and it's EXCITING!!! YOU NEED TO BE HAPPY ABOUT IT TOO!!!

The appointment Tuesday will be fine. PRIVATELY you need to let the teacher know about your family - deployed husband, never been away from you, etc. it always helps the teacher when they are informed...

STOP FEARING!!! Please! I know it's sounds so easy...instead of fearing this change - seriously -take a deep breath and stop making this hard! BREATHE!!! BE HAPPY! BE EXCITED!!! Think of the TV commercial for Office Depot and the parents riding around on the carts singing "it's the most wonderful time of the year!!!" If you are happy and excited - he will too! If you are a nervous nelly - he will pick up on that, play on it and manipulate you to get his way...

If at school he starts crying - tell him "it's okay - I'll miss you but I will be here at X time to pick you up. And Johnny is right down the hall...you will be GREAT!! I love you!!" and LEAVE!! Do NOT look back. DO NOT give one last hug - LEAVE!! Let the teacher take over and go...yeah - you'll want to cry in the car - this is your last baby and it's a HUGE milestone....just think of all the crying you'll do at his high school graduation...sooooo....stand up straight - smile - a REAL smile and think "it's the most wonderful time of the year!!"

I know how you feel. My daughter is starting Kindergarten on Monday and she's still 4! She'll be 5 at the end of August. She's never been away from us at all either, no preschool or daycare. Whenever I mention it to anyone at the school they say, Oh, she'll be fine, plenty of kids are in the same boat. She's actually really looking forward to it, though. We've been talking about how exciting it's going to be. We got her some new clothes the other day and again emphasized how fun and asked her "aren't you looking forward to starting school"? So now she's walking around saying, I love school! LOL
So, if you're not already, just turn it into a positive and talk about how fun and exciting it's all going to be. Sometimes it seems like it's harder on the parents than the kids. Wishing you all the best.

I vounteer in the classroom for both my elementary age children and that helped a lot when they started kindergarten. They both looked forward to mommy coming every Friday (or whatever day worked). When volunteering, I was at a desk in the hall and pulled children out individually to help them read or correct homework. So I wasn't by my child's side at all time, just within reach enough to raise their comfort level. My first child feared kindergarten for many of the same reasons your son has and she made it through! My daughter is also painfully shy - still is in third grade - and rarely talks in class. She claims to love school, though! I wish you and your son the best!

He will not be the only child to cry. Many children starting kinder have not been away from their parents. But the majority of them end up doing great.

Remember these teachers deal with this every fall.

As long as YOU lead with confidence and reinforce the good things about school, your son is going to do great..

Heck he will meet friends, love his teacher and what a great distraction from his father being away.

And you will have a chance to volunteer at the different schools and also meet other parents.

Hang in there. I know you miss your husband to turn to with the baby starting school, but you are all going to get through this.. This is an exciting time for your child.. Make it a celebration.

There's always anxiety in new kindergarten students, and teachers are ready for it. The best you can do is encourage him, tell him how much fun he will have, don't entertain his dislikes ~ he's entitled to them but they don't change the fact that he's starting kindergarten, take him and drop him off, don't linger around, leave and pick him up at dismissal time. He may have a few rough days, one of my sisters cried every morning for a week, then came home the fifth day happy as a clam and loving school, she'd made a new friend!

Keep a brave face on when you're talking to him, check out a few books on starting school, (the librarian in the children's section of your library can help) and keep encouraging him. It's a big transaction for the both of you but it will be fine.

My younger daughter cried a lot when she first went to school. She was in preschool at the time, but she's just a cute little homebody and always has been. The first few weeks were really rough, but we all hung in there and encouraged her, and she gained confidence, made friends, and became a fantastic student! She's going into 2nd grade on Monday, and has lots of friends and is at the top of her class academically. Looking back, I'm glad we made the choice to get her outside of her comfort zone a little bit, and show her we had confidence in her to be able to gain independence. I believe she is much stronger for it. Of course, you know your child, but I'm sure you agree that sometimes when kids say they don't want to do things, actually they do, they're just scared they'll fail. Sometimes they need mama to tell them they CAN succeed, and give them that little push they need. Good luck! It's so hard sending your youngest to kinder!!

How old is he? I know a ton of people who wait another year b/c they aren't emotionally ready. Then you could use the year to do mommy and me classes and then take baby steps to classes that you aren't there.

I am wondering if after a week or so, he will be totally fine. To get ready, perhaps you can read some really cute books together about the first day of school. Lots of cute ones at the library. Maybe take him to pick out a really cool new backpack or lunchbox. Take him to the school playground a few days this week and let him play on the playground, maybe even pack a picnic.

I would even do a small trial run for his separation anxiety from you. Get a friend or family member have him for an afternoon, let him have a sleep over at grandmas this weekend. Set up a play date of someone you know who will also be going to school, maybe a church friend.

Here are a few good articles on things you can do to help with the transition.

http://www.ehow.com/how_###-###-####_ease-childs-fears-st...

http://school.familyeducation.com/kindergarten/parents-an...

Having a best friend in the class will help. If I were you I would seek out other boys in his class and see if the moms are open to having a series of playdates to help make 'becoming friends' easier.

Of course, have a plan B just in case. Because if he cries all the time, the teacher might say he isn't ready for kindergarten. After all, turning 5 in June is a late birthday.

He is young. You could wait to start him next year and put him in pre school this year. 3 days a week. this is a perfect reason why parents should put their kids in preschool to get them ready. My kids went for 2 yrs. the first year was 2 days a week, 2nd year was 3days a week. They were so ready for kindergarten. But having his birthday in June, he is still really young. I have several friends that held off and put them in when they were 6. really helped. They excelled in school. But you have to put him some where. Pre school would be the best. For you, him and the teacher.

Probably just waiting one more year will help him....or home school him for a couple of years and enroll him in some activities a couple of days a week so he can adjust slowly. Kids are different and probably he needs more time with mommy.

I did not read all the other comments, but my oldest did the same thing, cried even when I took him to the Y, he would make himself sick so he didn't have to be in the child watch, where he could see us. He did the same thing at enrollment, so I had my sister take him for his first day (she took pictures for me) and there wasn't even one tear. I tried the next day and he was crying when we pulled into the parking lot and wouldn't even get out of the car. I took him home, called my sister she took him and he didn't even cry a tear, She ended up taking him for the first week, then he was fine with me taking him. It was easier on both of us!