Kids and Clothes

Definitely a battle you shouldn't fight when they're too young. And just an FYI, I put an orange polo with camo shorts on both of my boys - they go great together! :o)
Have you tried putting 2 or 3 outfits out for them? That way you both win. You choose & they choose!
My 6 year old used to walk out of the house looking like Punky Brewster (I personally loved it), but now she knows when things "don't match" or don't go well together. Hey, in the big scheme of LIFE, this is one thing that doesn't matter so much. Being kind, loving, gentle, selfless, etc. are the things that really matter! So let them have a little fun (and control)!

IMO this is not one of those things that you should battle. He wants to be a big boy, be proud of him for making his own decissions. Unless it's inappropriate for school, let him wear what makes him feel good.

My daughter has worn mismatched colorful funky socks for over 5 years. Now I see many kids doing the same.

One thing I found extremely helpful with my boys is to buy things in similar palletes and things that mix and match well and we pull out the whole week's worth of clothes at a time and hang them together.
I save my battles for the shopping trip (btw). I make them buy all neutral shorts/bottoms and then their tops can be as wild as they want.
I know I have boys so it is less of an issue, but picking basics at the store may help once you get home:) and letting her "choose" all her clothes up front and not chosing on a whim could also help.
good luck!

Let them where what they want to school. Save your battles for special occasions, pictures, church, etc.

This is a tough one, as we want them to look presentable, but at the same time, is it really worth fighting over?

If your son gets to the point that he is upset because you made his clothing choice and he wasn't able to, I say let him wear what he wants. This is one battle I am willing to lose each morning. I just cringe, smile and say "boy don't you look handsome". Really, the only person who cares is me. Unless he is wearing shorts in winter or a snowsuit in 90 degrees, I say let him pick for the most part.

Now, when it comes to what he eats or how he acts, time for mom to take over!

Good luck!

Let them where what they want to school, as long as it's within dress code and they can move/play in it. Make sure that nothing is distracting (fringe, beads, etc). Other than that, who cares? I assure you that no one at school will think less of you as a parent if your children come to school in crazy clothes. We're pretty used to it- now hoochie shorts and heels might warrant a call home! Yes, I've had to call elementary school parents to discuss appropriate skirt length...

My son (3) can pick out his own clothes for preschool, but we pick out what he wears to church, parties and family functions. I would let this one go. Eventually, most kids start to dress "the norm" because their friends do. This too shall pass...

have you looked at how the older kids dress?

My younger son is 15. Today he had on an orange shirt, a different orange for the shorts....& black/red Nikes. OMG....yuck. Yesterday he went fishing & wore khaki camo shorts...& a fish motif camo shirt in multi-green. Totally wrong!

& while I'm thinking of it, my 24yo son left the house in a black tshirt with a red/white/blue design on it.....with multi-brown camo shorts. Good grief. Double yuck!

My niece is also 15. She crabs if she doesn't have mismatched socks! Stripes on one foot, flowers on the other. She wears all bright colors for her socks...& they never match. Hot pink bra, blue tank, orange plaid shorts. She used to live exclusively in camo...she had it in all different colors & never matched the colors! Oh, my DH loved that phase! Now she's turning more girly-girly.....thanks to Taylor Swift.....& is focusing on flippy little dresses, cowboy boots, & fun jewelry.

In today's world, pretty much anything goes...& the kids always look cute. The issue is "cute" now....is very different from the "cute" of our childhoods! Time to let go.....& let your kids express their individuality. Personally, I love seeing kids in public in costumes, too....!!

There were days it wasn't worth the battle. When I pick my son up I never know what I'm going to get because my husband deals with that. There's days when I'm not really SURE who picked what out. My husband has an 'interesting' eye for clothes. I use to lay out two options but they seem to ignore mom's suggestions.

My biggest concern is being over or under dressed for the weather. My son loves long sleeve shirts when it's 85 degrees out. Such a goof ball.

I remember my stepdaughter being very upset the first day of public school when she was 7 and so worried about matching. She came home and cheerfully said, "No one else matches, either!"

I think that while you don't want them to look like they are neglected, many times as long as it fits, it's clean and isn't inappropriate, we let them wear whatever. You might want to put out two or three shirts and two or three pants and let them mix and match. Save the real battles for when it matters.

Like someone else said, if it's not appropriate to the occasion, we'd pick it out (like church or a wedding) or steer heavily in the right direction.

I think you should let them wear whatever they want as long as you are not going somewhere like church or a funeral. As for the stripes with polk-a-dots, they have a brand called little miss matched in which they sell everything stipes with polka dots. the socks are the same color scheme but one is stripes and one is polka dots. Maybe you daughter saw this and wants to duplicate it.
As long as they are happy with what they are wearing why is it such a big deal. I fight about this with my husband all the time cause my daughter wants to wear her dress shoes with play clothes or clothes that don't match. I say let them express themselves.

Updated

I think you should let them wear whatever they want as long as you are not going somewhere like church or a funeral. As for the stripes with polk-a-dots, they have a brand called little miss matched in which they sell everything stipes with polka dots. the socks are the same color scheme but one is stripes and one is polka dots. Maybe you daughter saw this and wants to duplicate it.
As long as they are happy with what they are wearing why is it such a big deal. I fight about this with my husband all the time cause my daughter wants to wear her dress shoes with play clothes or clothes that don't match. I say let them express themselves.

This is one of those questions that made me so grateful for uniforms when my kids were in traditional school (we homeschool now).

My sons both have a knack for putting together the LEAST matching outfits possible. As in red shorts, with a different shade of red shirt. Sigh. It actually amazes me sometimes.

It is one of those "pick your battle" issues . . .

Young children don't care about what looks good. As long as the clothes are weather appropriate, let it go!
And what's wrong with an orange t-shirt and camoflouge shorts? Sounds cute to me :)

I try not to intervene with style issues, but do with weather related choices.
By the way I think camo pants and orange shirts look great together ;) I personally don't like grey with camo, as grey goes with colors in the black family and camo is in the brown family. So everyone has different tastes and it sucks when those different tastes are with your kids LOL. My DD who is 4 and I have complete different tastes in everything. Makes for interesting shopping (which she loves to do).

I keep having to remind myself, that the style rules change.

There are some things I wore that my mother cringed at (but I also remember more than once, my mother would sigh and say, "I wish I were in your generation. I would have loved to have worn that, but my generation can't wear that style.") And now, I have seen socks sold in mismatched packages - twelve socks - no two of them the same.

So, I'm sure that some of the things I don't think go together, the next generation will think is great. Looking good to us, and looking good to them, are not the same thing.

But, if it bothers you a lot, you can take a tidbit from my colorblind relatives: everything in the closet matches everything else in the closet. Everything. Pick a two- or three- color scheme, and throw out everything else. Kind of boring, in my opinion, but it works.

Kids and parents often have very different ideas about what "looks good" and for me, as long as it is appropriate for the weather, and it's not the same thing every single day, I would let them pick what they want. You can always try to offer 2 or 3 choices that you are okay with, but they might just pick what they really want anyway. You can always try to point what what looks good together, but they might be open to your suggestion, or not. One time I was getting my daughter ready for preschool and she insisted on wearing all stripes - shirt, pants AND socks that all had stripes, though none actually matched or coordinated with each other. I tried to talk her out of it but she wasn't hearing it - as far as she was concerned, everything matched because they all had stripes. I realized that this was a battle I wasn't going to win, and wasn't worth winning anyway if she was going to get that upset about it. So she went to school that day wearing what she wanted, the other moms noticed, and they KNEW it wasn't my doing, but they had all been there too. My daughter also likes to wear socks that don't match, on purpose - I don't care. One little girl in my daughter's class showed up every day with a princess costume dress over her clothes, because that's just the way it was. I think I would draw the line if it was picture day or something but otherwise, I would let it be.

Look at it this way - your son left for school upset, rather than happy, all over a shirt. Not trying to be morbid or anything, but if something bad had happened, if he had died in a car accident, would it have been worth it?

Hi, M.:

You're the mother.
Pick out their clothes and give them your choices for
them to wear.

For example: show the child a choice of two pants/short, etc.
show the child a choice of two tops, etc.
They have a choice but you are doing the guiding.

The other thing, practice a color matching game periodically with them.

Just a thought.
D.

If your kids are this young wanting their own way and you are giving it to them then you will have big problems down the road.

With all of my children that are still home (4 kids age 16 and 6yr triplets) they can wear what they want with my approval. Example, my 16 year old son can pick his own clothes as long as the pants are not baggy, no boxer underwear (boys need support), no tees with tasteless logos or sayings, no skulls or other creepy symbols that send the wrong symbol, and so on. After all, I pay for his clothes. And even when he does buy his own he lives in my house, my rules and represents our family and my husband's last name. There's a lot of things that he CAN wear. He dresses "cool" and doesn't look like a punk.

With the 6 year old triplets, I obviously buy their clothes for them. The boys aren't that picky but my daughter is enough. If she gets too diva-ish I guide her to the right choices and talk to her about it. I tell her which clothes don't match and let her know that I don't want her looking silly. She trusts me and I let her know that certain clothes she wants to wear on days she shouldn't can be worn on the next available day. On gym days she wear appropriate clothing, just like Art days. And she's not allowed to wear dresses or skirts to school because she wouldn't be able to run and jump and climb around as much with dresses on. I feel it's silly to put bike shorts under a dress because why wear the dress then? Defeats the purpose and she forgets she's in a dress because of the shorts and lets her dress go flying up over her head. So she can wear dresses at home and on weekends. She loves her summer dresses.

I'm wondering why your preschool son gets so upset about clothes at such a young age. So be it if he gets upset as long as he is still showing proper behavior, but he needs to follow your dress code now because it will really get bad later.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

My kids love the independence of choosing what to wear. As long as its weather appropriate, I let them wear it. They have often gone out with clothes on backwards or inside out, b/c they put them on themselves & didn't want it changed. They were proud they dressed themselves & I let them be proud about it.
As for dressing "silly" shouldn't we allow that, shouldn't we embrace it! Very soon they will conform to what everyone else wants them to wear. Why rush it. Doesn't some part of you wish you could walk out of the house confident while wearing stripes & polka dots. Maybe we as adults should all take a day to dress silly & remember the child with in us. That said, sometimes I let my boys pick out my clothes & I will wear whatever they pick as long as its weather appropriate.
One more thing...I think green camo shorts & orange shirts look great. We do that combo all the time.

Maybe you can try to have your children choose their clothes for school the night before. You can intervene when necessary, but the decisions will be made and they will be able to think about the clothes all night long. Your son might have been upset because he had a vision of his outfit ahead of time. When you give them the chance to plan ahead, there will be no surprises when they get dressed for you or them.

Not a hill to die on at our house. As our kids have gotten older (12 & 14), the fashionista will tell her older brother when things don't match...and he takes her advice to heart as she knows what the other kids at school wear. Our kids don't have any inappropriate clothing in their wardrobes...so what if it doesn't match the way I would match it.

Updated

Not a hill to die on at our house. As our kids have gotten older (12 & 14), the fashionista will tell her older brother when things don't match...and he takes her advice to heart as she knows what the other kids at school wear. Our kids don't have any inappropriate clothing in their wardrobes...so what if it doesn't match the way I would match it.

Pick your battles. I would let them win out over sending them to school crying. It's only clothes. Now if it were a more formal event or church, you'd definitely have the final say. This is usually a phase that will pass more quickly than you think. Maybe have MWF be the days YOU pick out what they wear, and T/TH is their days to choose. That seems fair to me. :) Good luck!

My 3 year old is very picky, too. It has to have Spiderman, Lightning McQueen, Batman, or Buzz Lightyear, or he will whine about it. Sometimes when I drop him off at preschool, the kids will come and look at his shirt and say the character's name, and he likes the attention so much, he wants them to do it every day. I have started only keeping three outfits upstairs- the rest are in a pile in the basement. Then he can choose one of the three. Sometimes I have those characters in there, sometimes I don't. Also, I've taken out all camo and 'odd' pants...we are just pulling from jeans, khakis, and navy blue or black bottoms...so they pretty much go with any shirt he picks.

Hi M.-

I agree...pick your battles! (wait til they are teens...YITE!!!)

At this age, I picked out two outfits the nite before...They could pick from those...kind of a 'forced' choice...and a win win!

Thank GOD my eldest is now in the army...the uniforms are a savior for him while on duty...but I shudder to think of his off duty time!

**sigh**

Best luck!
Michele/cat

In preparation for my daughter's first day of school the kindergarten teachers organized a Kindergarten roundup to help the students and the parents become familiar with the school and structure. One thing they told us is that while individuality is important to maintain you also need to help teach that sometimes it is distracting. That's not to say that she shouldn't pick out her own clothes or shoes but structure it so that she still looks good and make her rationalize her decisions. For instance my daughter will pick plaid shorts and a shirt with flowers. They don't go together but when asked why she picked those she can tell me that the flowers match the color of the plaid. If she can rationalize her decision in a reasonable manner then let her were stripes and dots. How old is your daughter? If she's still in elementary school what she wears now isn't so important if it matches. If the clothes are clean and neat it won't matter much to the other students. But maybe you should help her to decide which clothes to wear. Match them and place them in her drawer so instead of picking the separate clothes she will pick between two complete outfits. Have her help match them up and talk about why they go together. Make it fun though so she doesn't seem like you are forcing her to wear certain things.