JFF: Real Life Vs. What You Pictured

"Why buy it for $8 when you can make it for $92 in craft supplies". 😜

I'm guilty as well.

Sorry you are going through this...I know this isn't where you wanted to be.

I agreed to take china from both my mother and grandmother. I have never used it and never will.

I didn't have to take it. And now I have no idea how to get rid of it because my sister says I can't possibly.

I did however just say no to silverware that no one wanted (we were the last people they asked) from my husband's side. Learned my lesson.

I have enough scarves to dress all the snowmen Calvin of Calvin& Hobbes makes. Most are hand knit gifts which I never put to use but also can't part with.

Also we have been gifted a bunch of maps and other printed art that we haven't any space for. They are in their poster rolls waiting to see the light of day or getting eaten by silverfish (not sure which).

Glad you are downsizing.

F. B.

I haven't gotten rid of it, but I bought a sewing machine before my 1st was born. I made the curtains for his nursery, and thought I'd make other house stuff. HA! It's 10 years later, and those curtains are the only thing I've made with it. How do people with kids have time to sew?

DH and I also somehow thought we had to have formal dining room furniture. For all those formal dinner parties we were going to have I guess? We have an eat-in kitchen and use the dining room maybe once a year. If I were doing it again, I'd skip the dining room furniture, and put in a student desk and organization center so my kids would have somewhere to do homework.

ETA: Oh, here's another one: breadmaker. We registered for one, got it as a wedding gift. We used it ALL THE TIME. Who knew that having fresh delicious homemade bread on hand every day could be so easy? 2 months and 10 pounds heavier (each), we realized why this was a bad idea. But in my fantasy life, I can eat half a loaf of fresh bread every day AND still be thin! (Breadmaker has now been stuffed in the back of the pantry for years)

Great question!

I just saw one of those Facebook memes that covered this: "I tried that Japanese decluttering technique where you hold something and decide whether it gives you joy. So far, I've thrown out all the vegetables and the electric bill."

We did a big purge in the fall, with my son leading the way and helping me outvote my pack-rat husband. It actually felt good, although my husband is now searching for something he hasn't seen in 30 years and now he's convinced we threw it out. Sigh.

I'm still loaded up with photos and other mementos I naively thought would be made into beautiful scrapbooks (which I have no talent for, let alone the time). One of these years I'll pay someone to sort and arrange in a digital form.

We have stuff we hate or which has holes in it but it was given to us by someone we like or handed down by someone in the family who didn't want it either. Another sigh.

Everybody has that kitchen drawer filled with things my mother calls "string too short to use." I've got that plus drawers/shelves in the basement filled with enough miscellaneous hardware to build another space station - cabinet knobs, screws, bolts, nails, shower curtain rings, and stuff whose purpose escapes me entirely.

Gardening stuff - yeah, half bags of fertilizer I won't use because it's damaging to the environment/water table, seeds I didn't have time to plant 3 years ago but somehow I think things will be different this year, and single garden gloves in search of the mate.

Sewing - patterns for stuff I can't fit into or which went out of style years ago, and patterns for Halloween costumes that my kid and step-grandkids outgrew years ago. I keep thinking someone will want me to make something for them...and imagine that I'll have time when I really have to plant 3-year-old seeds and sort hardware.

Time to call Freecycle!

Seriously, I do commend you for moving forward with all the issues and kids you have to deal with! Good luck!!!

I haven't gotten rid of them yet, however I KNOW there are several boxes in the closet with my college essays in them as well as some books from my beloved courses. Last time I looked at them has to have been over 10 years ago. Kudos on letting things go when their time has come! You are an inspiration.

Too funny. Love the question. I purged the stuff you're purging long ago but your question reminded me of the crazy stuff I asked for in my wedding registry. I am such a practical person, I have no idea what I was thinking then.

I guess we thought we were going to be some kind of specialty bakers. During our last couple of moves I discovered dozens of bread pans and muffin pans and loaf pans of all shapes and sizes. Fluted, star-shaped, ones for making cocktail sandwich breads, small, large, round, square, towers, tiers, ceramic, non-stick, aluminum, glass, stone...even one for making some kind of special holiday Finnish loaf (and we are not Finnish nor have we ever been to Finland nor do we eat any Finnish food nor do we know anyone who's Finnish).

I don't bake often, except for the occasional baguette or breadsticks, although I do cook every day, and I make everything from scratch - no bottled salad dressings or marinades, no pre-packaged or processed stuff.

My dh, on the other hand, is a fabulous baker, but he hand shapes ciabatta loaves, or Pugliese breads, or makes cinnamon rolls or crescent rolls that are amazing, but does he use those crazy shaped pans? Nope. Just needs a big bowl, a rolling pin, a mat, and a sheet pan.

I've been weeding them out and getting rid of them through various means. What were we thinking?

I too thought I would be entertaining, adults only of course at high class cocktail parties with about 40 champagne flutes, 4 different kinds of wine glasses, and several "bartenders" cookbooks full of all the fancy mixed drinks you could ever make! Ha, I haven't had a mixed drink since my early 20's! I drink a couple beers straight from the bottle when I am watching my kids play in the yard on the weekends, that's as good as it gets.

I also have several sets of dinnerware and china and beautiful "special occasion" serving pieces. The reality is the house we bought has a tiny dining room so no dinner parties. Lots of BBQ's though, with paper plates or melamine when I'm feeling fancy!

I stockpile craft supplies too... one of these days my 2 year old will actually need to use his closet for his own stuff and I'll have some tough choices to make...

Fun question!

I loved antiques, & found some unique sewing machine cabinets, with the machines in them. I had this neat idea to have them refinished, & have the machines serviced, so I could have a "craft party" with friends. My husband jumped on the bandwagon, and since these were literally a dime-a-dozen in our area for many years, we continued to accumulate. None of them were refinished, only 1 machine worked, & when I finally said "enough!" & decided to get rid of what we didn't personally need, I sold ELEVEN of them on Craigslist!! T. :)

We live in an apartment, so I am pretty careful about what we bring into the house.
HOWEVER....my husband....bless his heart. For YEARS he was convinced that he could get our sons to wear sweater vests and corduroy pants and would buy that for them. Nice long sleeve button up shirts, 3 and 4 button dress shirts, cargo pants...My boys NEVER wore them. Never. I finally convinced my husband to stop spending money on things that they aren't going to wear and let me donate all of their clothing. These boys wear soccer shirts and soccer pants or shorts. That's it. Everything else just takes up space.

Not so much so laughing about my fantasy life, but letting go of things that hold memories. I can't keep everything, but sometimes letting go is hard. I freecycle a lot, or donate a lot. I recently donated a bunch of early education materials I received as gifts for my DD who has far surpassed them. I don't need to keep a preschool counting book when our HeadStart program could use it.

I do have a ton of fabric. I recently heard about http://www.solehope.org/ and I plan to go through my stash to see what I could cut and donate to them for shoes.

I find that while I love decorative kitchen towels, the winter ones stay in use all year and I don't rotate them as much as I planned to.

Downsizing is hard sometimes, but you seem to be handling it well. I hope you purge what you don't need, and find a few treasures to keep that you forgot about. Most of us really need far less than we have.

The thing that comes to mind is from our wedding registry: a juicer. For our healthy living goals. We used it a grand total of one time. Once we realized it would take a bushel of fruit to make a glass of juice, we packed it away in the kitchen. Finally donated it, I think.

Oh, I also bought some gardening books so we could grow our own vegetables. Never happened!

The only thing that keeps me from purging like this is when the kids are gone. I know before the grand kids came to be raised my husband and I entertained a lot. I had dinner for 12 quite often. Things like Chicken Parmesan on a bed of pasta with a red marinara style sauce, nice dinner salad, and lots of homemade bread (Someone else made it for me since I can't seem to master bread).

I use a lot of my dishes and things but some is in the lower cabinets that I haven't had out since the kids came. When they're gone I know I'll pull out my china, nicer dishes, and entertainment supplies. If I got rid of them now I know I'd have to repurchase them down the road.

One day I'll be ready to hang up the party stuff but not quite yet.

Oh my yes!
Two years ago I went through every cupboard in the kitchen and got rid of everything I hadn't used in a year.
It freed up so much storage space I could now get my counters cleared off.
Last year I went through all the boxes in my closet - all the clothes I'd never wear again, things that will never fit - what remains is so nice and organized!
I can find everything!
We're in the process of doing this in the office room and playroom - and it's WORK going through it! - but we're beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel and it's so much easier cleaning and dusting when there's not too much stuff cluttering up your space and life!
A lot of it though is stuff our parents passed on to us (they didn't know how to throw it away so they got it out of their closets and dumped it into ours) that we just put away and we'd go through it later.
Well - it's later now!
It can seem a bit overwhelming - but we're chipping away at it room by room.

At first when I started reading your question, I was afraid you were depressed about how life turned out for you, JB. (With a husband like yours, I wouldn't blame you.)

But that wasn't what your post is about, and you actually made ME feel good that you're so upbeat! (I'm tired right now and a nap would do me good, LOL!)

So, yes, I've done purges and I actually need to do another one now that we're empty nesters. It's hard to get rid of my son's stuff. And I've got more of my own stuff that I didn't get rid of in the last purge that still sits in the drawers and cabinets and doesn't see the light of day.

One of the posters mentions family china and the sort, and I do have some of that. I can't get rid of it either because it's all I have left of family members who have died. It makes me feel good to have them, but they do take up room.

As far as parties are concerned, I know what I use that I like best. The best thing I ever bought for bigger parties is a big box of cheap wine glasses from Costco. I leave that box in the closet and pull it out for each party, pull them out, use them, wash them, and then put the glasses back in that big box. Out of 20, I've only broken 2 in 5 years. Bowls, platters, serving spoons, disposable tablecloths, plastic see-through disposable plates - my party staples. If I'm having a dinner party, enough china for that, or mix and match if there are more than 12 people. Good bartending utensils. Right now I need to get my dinette chairs recovered - I keep putting that off...

Other than that, I don't keep what I really don't need outside of the heirloom stuff. I love knowing what works and what doesn't.

Happy for you that you're moving out of your house. Getting to the point where you don't have to deal with your ex more than is absolutely possible will free your mind and your heart up so much.

If you've seen some of my posts, I have been "downsizing and organizing" for the last 6+ years. lol However, I have hit it hard this last year.

I came across "memories" that pop up daily on Facebook and have seen my progress. I have gotten rid of so much! But when new people come over they expect to see a "minimalist" house since I post so much about it but in reality, I still have a ton.

I did go through the kitchen last year and got rid of all the 'extra' stuff. I had 7 9x13 pans. I mean, who needs all those! And I got rid of all the mix and match coffee mugs, plates, Tupperware items, utensils, etc. I keep the basic stuff and it's been so nice!

I was at a store the other day and saw a ceramic dish shaped and painted like a watermelon with a handle....I thought...how cute to serve fruit salad in that! And I *almost* bought it. Then I got a grip on myself...I don't need to store that just for the one time a year I might actually serve a fruit salad, and I can't think of a time that I ever have served a fruit salad. LOLOL

And speaking of dishes and china...years ago I found Christmas plates on clearance. I bought several sets...I think I have Christmas dishes now for 24. There are FIVE of us that get together for Christmas. I guess in my head I was preparing for the "just in case" I decide to invite the neighborhood for Christmas, I'll be ready with cheap matching Christmas plates! LOLOL I think I will get rid of them now.

when i got married i was living in a tiny house (like 600 sq ft tiny) i didn't have the storage space for anything that was not used regularly. so we have the basics and thats about all. when ds was born we borrowed a ton of stuff and gave it all back when dd no longer needed it. all the other non sentimental baby stuff went to dh's cousin who is expecting baby #1 in the next week or so.
we have moved to a house thats double the size but didn't lose the minimalist mentality. most of our stuff gets used regularly, and what is not going to be used often is usually tossed. when grandma passed and i was asked to take this or that i first thought will i use it? and where will i store it? if i said no to the first question and didn't have an easy answer to the second one i passed on taking the stuff.
i am a sahm and do a ton of crafting, i crochet and sew. my yarn stash is huge but i always find something to use up the yarn (play food for dd, dinosaurs or other animals for ds) and i sew just about anything.( i am working on a quilt for both kids, i used scraps to make dd a baby doll diaper bag, ds has a scrappy pillow, i made a carrying case with storage room for their leap pad. i used scraps and other materials lying around to make ds a play mat for his hotwheels cars)
with a small house and hardly anything in it its simple to clean and that only takes about an hour a day. then i have the rest of my day (while ds is at school) to craft. dd loves to help (and will probably be sewing her own barbie clothing by age of 6)
i garden and can what i hearvest that is too much to eat that day i kinda feel like i am living my fantasy life... now to figure out how to get that fantasy life to make money....

I think we are walking in the same shoes. I apparently love craft projects, buying supplies for them and then NEVER actually doing the project. I also have tons of party things but don't really party. Our current home is not well laid out for entertaining. So I just purchased a beautiful huge gazebo which can and will be used for entertaining and relaxation this summer. I will probably purge soon but not this very moment in time. I'm not allowed to buy anything else for the inside of the house unless something goes. My restrictions of my crazy. lol.