JFF- How Do You Show Your Husband You LOVE Him?

Updated on March 28, 2011
N.G. asks from Arlington, TX
20 answers

Hi ladies!

My husband and I have been together since we were fifteen years old- together since 1998, married eight years in July. We have two little girls. He's an amazing, hard-working man, a wonderful husband, and an excellent father.

I have a chemical imbalance that I take medication for, and I suffer from PMDD, so I can be very trying to get along with, to say the least. He copes beautifully and never passes up an opportunity to show me that he loves me, is supportive of me, and is dedicated. Unfortunately, I'm not always great at reciprocating! Expressing love to my husband doesn't seem to be my strong-suit.

Other than rewarding him in the bedroom, hugs and kisses, etc., what are some creative ways you can think of to give my man a little daily boost of love? I'm not looking for anything dramatic or over-the-top, just little ways to show him that I love him and I love being his wife.

Thanks ahead of time!

1 mom found this helpful

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

A note in the lunchbox or briefcase...

A greeting card every now and then....

Pick up or make his favorite dessert once in awhile....

For my husband, sometimes I just let him live to see another day ;)

2 moms found this helpful

A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Hubby is a fantastic cook...everyone knows it. But I like to "rub" in my Facebook status to all my friends who don't have hubby's that cook...
he gets a kick out of it. Like last night he made fajitas...my status said "mmmm...hubby is making faijitas...I am so lucky to have a man that cooks."...

He's not a touchy feely kinda guy so saying I love you doesn't really work for him...I just try to show him in ways that he can see but doesn't have to get all touchy feely back.

1 mom found this helpful

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B.

answers from Augusta on

IF I told you , it's be deleted from the site . . .. .;-)

3 moms found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Lancaster on

I make sure he hears me singing his praises when I talk to my friends and family. I try to tell him something I love or admire about him every day and when he gets home from work, I greet him like we've been separated for weeks!

1 mom found this helpful

K.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

-I put little notes in his car on the seat. So when he leaves for work, it will start off his day better~
- He eats breakfast on his way to work (drives an hour), so I will put a little note under his breakfast sandwich...
- He has a favorite candy bar and I'll have it sitting on the counter when he gets home from work (only do that once in awhile because he doesn't eat a lot of sweets)...

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Detroit on

Write him notes and put them in his lunch box, make up a CD with a lot of your favorite loves songs, make him his special favorite dinner or sweets, give him a back rub, text him or call and say I love you and just tell him in a note or in person how much you love and appreciate him. He will appreciate any or all of these things, my husband does.

1 mom found this helpful
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R..

answers from Chattanooga on

For me, it's little things. Taking his hand while we are driving, snuggling up to him before falling asleep, Scratching his head or back (He's like a freaking puppy. lol) stealing his hat, stealing his shirt to sleep in (especially after he's worn it.) If I'm really feeling the love, I will make his favorite meal (or try). Now that we have a baby, one of our favorite things is to instigate a game of 'walk to mommy!' 'walk to daddy!'. We always feel super-close and happy when playing with her together. :)

1 mom found this helpful

T.L.

answers from St. Louis on

I know my husband is going to have a long hard week this week so I have a surprise for him this coming weekend. I got him tickets to his favorite thing to do. I just can't wait to give them to him.

A cheap thing I like to do is mail him cards to work. I know corney, but he seems to like it.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I'm all about little surprises so here are things I do:

I sneak into the garage and leave a candy bar and small note on the front seat of his car so when he leaves for work, he has a little more smile in him. I've arranged to have a babysitter show up w/o him knowing and tell him to get his shoes on, we are going to see a movie. I will make his favorite choco chip cookies and leave them on his home office chair for when he gets home. I'll text him randomly and just put, "XOXOX". I'll take his shirts to the dry cleaner so he doesn't have to, I'll have dinner waiting on the table for the exact moment he walks in the door and I'll even bring out a board game just to let loose to let him know how connected I really am to him. Hope my ideas were helpful!

1 mom found this helpful

E.B.

answers from Seattle on

we are big fb people back and forth...so my mom and dad post new pictures up on the fb pages often for my sis in alaska. I bring them into this because i will leave messages under the photo saying..''i only hope cory and I look so in love with each other when we're whatever the picture is indicating''. i hope that makes sense. he loves it because he gets the photo updates too and when he sees my comment...he will one comment back....then send me personal message...on how no matter what he is my ''lobster for life''.....he has gone through countless times of me being helpless...either while prego, or ill, or injured....he is my main man...the right hand dad...or better my hero...which according to my counselor...all hubbies want to feel like the hero!!

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K.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

I reward him by not kicking his arse when he ticks me off or not throwing him out of the house when he spends our money and puts us in the poor house yet again. LOL

I guess for us it's just they every day things. We support each other. He brings me flowers out of the blue sometimes and wants to take me out to dinner after the kids go to bed. We just do little things for each other that others wouldn't notice or care about.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

just tell him that you love being his wife...
Men need to 'hear' compliments too.
They get unsure of themselves too.
My Hubby likes to hear me give him compliments.
If not, beyond sex, they wonder too....

Even if its not your strong suit, just try saying things to him.

Or buy him flowers too.
With a nice note.
Just because....

Every Spouse, needs reciprocation.
To fill their cup.

1 mom found this helpful

J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Mine loves it when I bake things for him to take to work and share.
I think it makes him feel proud that he has a girl who will bake goodies for him, mainly because the other guy's wives don't...they hardly cook, let alone bake.
When I surprise him at work with a coffee. I usually do this when he texts me earlier in the morning that he's really tired. He commutes 100+ hours a day, usually only gets about 4 hours of sleep and works hard labor....I will gladly get him some coffee.
Sometimes I will buy a hallmark card and put it in his lunch bag. I just write notes in it telling him how lucky I am to have him. =)

K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

It is the little things that count!

I sometimes let him sleep in a extra few minutes and set out his clothes, put on the coffee and pack his lunch for him.

I compliment him on all the things that he does well, like ask him to make me a rip-roaring fire and then compliment him on how great he is at it, b/c it's true!

Make sure that all our boys knows how incredibly awesome their Dad is! From making fires to fixing computers to jumping over fences to building rockets to making dinner to knowing all the answers on Jeopardy to a million other things :)

~The most important thing I think I do to show him how much I love him is to remain solid and support him in all he does and to ensure all our kids know that we are a TEAM!

*We go out of our way to have quality together time, not just in the bedroom...just regular old doing nothing in particular other than being together, time! It is good for both of us but I know it is especially good for him, makes him feel needed and wanted as a man and a friend and a companion/confidant...not just as a Dad.

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

One book that was eye-opening for me was "The five love languages!" It really opened the door for my husband and I to discuss how we feel loved the most. He is gifts, so all the times I was trying to provide a super clean, and orderly house (acts of service) he was not getting his fill of 'love.' His other is personal touch---just in that he would prefer me to sit on the couch and hold his hand while we watch something----I now conscientiously notice that he is watching tv and stop what I am doing to sit with him.

Something else I would suggest is to just ask him. I wanted to know what made my husband feel respected, so I asked. I was surprised that he would like for me to stop what I am doing when he gets home and say hello and give him a kiss....that is it. My friend's husband wants to know dinner is soon, so she has the table set for him when he gets home.

Men really need to feel respected, which for women we need to feel loved. When in doubt, ask him. It was eye-opening for me when my husband asked me what made me feel loved.....at first I had no idea. If I have no idea, surely he would never get it right.

As for your hormones I HIGHLY recommend Dr. Chalmers.....you did not ask for this but you can see my older posts/replies and see what I have gone through but I have been in a bad place before and this man helped me more than words can express.

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

I pay extra close attention to the things he talks about and think back on recent conversations that we've had and think about what he's been saying he'd like to do, or wants, and get it for him. My hubby was saying he wants a new coffee mug, so I got him one.

I always write a love note and put it in his lunch box in the morning.
Make his favorite dinner, with candles, and a movie.

Anything, out of the ordinary is nice, and i'm sure he will appreciate anything you do for him, just because you were thinking about him.

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K.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Number one way is to show respect. I think if you have that in the first place, then everything else just falls into place. Of course always speak to him kindly, compliment him often don't talk down to him like you are his mom. Tell him not only do you love him, but you like him, respect him and that he is your best friend.

T.K.

answers from Dallas on

My husband tells me he doesn't need me to do stuff so he will feel loved - thats my thing. He says he needs to feel respected and appreciated. It goes along with the being a hero thing mamatothreewee said. When I make him feel respected he feels important and valuable. I am not good at it, but working on it. That fills his tank, the way love notes fill mine.

T.M.

answers from Reading on

I know these are pretty basic, but here are some of the things that I do...
Make him dinner almost every night of the week. Keep the house clean. I thank him daily for going to work and also ask him "what's going on" at work. I make him treats that I know he likes or even pick them up at the grocery store. I try to do things that I know make him satisfied. Every mans needs are different, so you do for your man what you know puts a smile on his face.
I would honestly say that the most expressive thing you could do for your husband is show him respect...respect for his hard work and his commitment to your family. Respect will lift him up a lot and will allow him to realize how much you rely on him and need him.

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R.L.

answers from Roanoke on

I love doing little things for my husband, like packing his lunch, sending him a random sweet text, etc..but there's more to it. For us, it's quality time together AND apart. Together: Aside from bedroom activities :), sometimes I turn off the tv and pull out a board game or play cards and chat. Other times I buy a bottle of wine and we sit outside on the patio. I don't always have to TELL him I love him (although I do frequently), but silence is sometimes just as effective. Apart: I know he likes to do projects, so sometimes I tell him to go to the store, get some new tools (he loves that), and work on that (insert project here) that he's been wanting to do. After a few hours of banging around and doing manly activities, he's so proud to show me his latest creation.

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