IVF Questions & Being Pregnant Later in Age

Updated on September 13, 2009
J.M. asks from Katy, TX
17 answers

My husband and I have been trying to conceive for the last 3 yrs and with no success. My husband does not have any of his own and would like to have one of his own, he has, however, raised my 8 yr old daughter since age 2. I, too, would like a baby in the house :) We have been thru 3 cycles of IUI with no success. We are going to go thru IVF treatments and have a Dr's appt next week. I am excited and a little scared.

Has anyone been thru IVF and what exactly goes on? Can you get pregnant on 1 IVF treatment? I have consulted with our doctor and have researched it, however, reading and discussing it w/ the doctor is not the same as sharing it with women who have gone thru it.

My concerns are my age, I am turning 40 in a couple of weeks and am concerned with there being birth defects. Are there any mothers who gave birth at later of age? Other than a amnio, how can I be sure that my baby will be healthy?I've prayed that I get pregnant first and that the baby is healthy.

Is there anyone that I can discuss this with so that I can ease my mind? I look forward to any of your suggestions and comments.

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A.B.

answers from San Antonio on

I did four IVFs, two with donor eggs. If you happen to need donor eggs, then your age doesn't matter at all. If you do use your own eggs, there are small risks, but they are small.

Yes, you can get pg the first time, but a lot of people don't. The average probability is about 30% per try; that's why they tell you to plan on 3 times. Your actual percentage will depend on your age, your FSH level, how many eggs you can get while on the drugs, etc. Having been pregnant before is probably promising to your doctors.

When I was going through this, the most valuable thing to me was the IVF discussion boards on ivillage's parentsplace. Go search on ivillage.com for an IVF board. If there is more than one, start reading them all, and when you learn which one has the most participation, stick with that one. I learned EVERYTHING from the many women who posted. They were in all different parts of the process, and I learned so much from their experiences. By the time it was my turn, nothing was an unknown. Although I never got pg (we moved on and have adopted) I am still cyberfriends with some of the women who went through that with me. It's a great source.

Edited:
I just found an IVF board on ivillage for you and I think it's pretty active:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-ppivf

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A.S.

answers from San Antonio on

Hi J.,
I know first hand what you are going through, we did not go through the IUI but decided to go directly to the IVF. At the time I had a 3 yr old son from a previous relationsgip but my husband had never had a child of his own all though, he has always treated my son as his own. We successfully conceived after some trials and tribulations through our 2nd FET (frozen embryo transfer)and we now have a beautiful 3 1/2 year old daughter. Please email me and I will be happy to discuss my experiences with you. ____@____.com

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J.M.

answers from Odessa on

Hi J..

WOW! I've been where you are. As a matter of fact, I'm 40 and about to have 2 of my frozen embryo's transferred next week!

The rest of the story...

I did 7 IUI's and 1.5 IVF's with a Dr. who should have never performed them without first properly diagnosing me. The doctor I chose was convenient and although I'd heard good and bad, I decided it would be better to stay close to home. All of my treatments failed.

After much heartbreak and the most "absurd diagnosis" followed by a ton of research and one excellent recommendation, I decided to travel to Dallas to “just visit” with a Physician who is at the top of his game: Dr. Samuel Marynick at Texas Center for Reproductive Health at Baylor Hospital ###-###-####. After only 10 minutes into our visit, he said "I think this is what's wrong". He ran tests and he was exactly right! I did one IVF cycle with Dr. Marynick and he retrieved 52 eggs, 27 of which fertilized. After culture, we ended up with 17 embryo's, 7 of which were blastocysts (excellent quality embryo's). We transferred 2 of the 17 and I delivered a beautiful baby girl 38 weeks later. When our baby girl was 10 months old, we thawed and transferred 2 more embryo's and my Boy/Girl twins were born 36 weeks later. Along the way, freezing and thawing, we lost some of the embryo's and we are down to 5 frozen embryo’s (blastocysts), and are currently awaiting thawing and transfer of 2 more.

Although 1 month shy of 36 when my eggs were retrieved, I was still advised to have genetic testing, which I refused. A lot of women feel differently and that is ok, but I didn’t care one way or another. I was giving every child a chance regardless of imperfection, and no- I’m no Saint LOL! Fortunately, all of our biological children have been very healthy. Before IVF, we adopted a baby boy at birth with the notion we were adopting a perfect baby. 3 months into it, we found out differently. Our now 7 year old is profoundly handicap and we love him just the same.

I read A LOT of books on infertility and I can tell you the very best one I’ve read is: Infertility Survival Handbook (Paperback) by Elizabeth Swire-Falker.

I’ve recommended this book to several of my friends and all have had their "AHA" moment with it. It is very thorough from finding the right Dr. with the right Lab facility to the definitions (blastocyst) to how much (realistically) this will cost and everything in between.

If you want to message me with other questions, please do. I’ve done a lot of this and if you need support, sometimes it’s nice to talk to another person of “advanced maternal age” LOL who’s been through it, too.

I wish you success and God speed!
J.

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C.B.

answers from Austin on

I had one two weeks after my 41st birthday and one at 42. I had amnios with both to rule out birth defects. They are both well and beautiful. My son is about to graduate from college, and my daughter is in college. You will be more tired than you have been before, but also have more wisdom to deal with issues. My kids have kept me young. I had some issues with the first pregnancy, but they were not age related. The second was just like the one in my 20s, no problems at all. I have a good friend who had her last child at 47...a surprise! He's healthy as well. So rest easy. Your risks are only slightly greater than when you're younger.

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D.G.

answers from College Station on

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J.H.

answers from Houston on

We conceived our daughter through IVF. I turned 34 during our IVF process. The office I went through was wonderful and kept us "in the know" throughout the entire process. My first cycle was canceled due to poor response (does not happen to most people) and conceived on our second cycle. We had friends that conceived on their first cycle.

IVF treatment is done over the course of weeks. You will be "put on a calendar" and monitored. I started with birth control pills (believe it or not) to adjust my cycle. Then began a suppressing drug, next I started drugs to increase egg production and finally the HCG shot (to ovulate). We then had the retrieval and 3 days later the fertilized eggs were put in. We only had 2 (poor response thing). I believe at age 40 they will put 3 unless you want less. There is a higher chance of multiples with IVF. After this I took progesterone shots. I took progesterone in some form until I was 12 weeks pregnant. At the 6 weeks mark I was released from the RE and saw a regular OB/GYN.

I found the resolve website (www.resolve.org) and carolyn's board (http://www.carolynsboards.org/phpbb3/index.php) to be good places to get information and support.

Feel free to email me if you would like. I wish you well.
Elaine

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M.R.

answers from Houston on

I've been through IVF but I was in my late 20's and early 30's so I can't answer your second question. But on IVF, yes you can get pregnant on 1 IVF cycle. I got pregnant with my first IVF cycle and gave birth to a healthy baby and then it took 4 cycles before I had baby #2,he was healthy and conceived from a frozen embryo, wasn't a fresh cycle. I did have one more attempt for a third but it did not work. I'm not sure how much you've read on how it works and how much you are wanting to know but basically you will take different injections, one of those will stimulate your ovaries so multiple eggs can be removed. They will remove the eggs with a large needle, generally with an anistetic where you are awake but you don't remember anything. Take it easy the rest of that day. Then depending on how many eggs they got, how many fertilized and how well they are developing they will put the embryos (generally 2, maybe 3)back into your uterus 2-5 days later. For this procedure you have to have a full bladder so it can be a bit uncomfortable. You will be doing progesterone shots at this time and then you just wait. It depends on your doctor on will they will schedule a blood pregnancy test. One of mine did the test the day my cycle was due, a different one waited two weeks. Hopefully that is the information you were looking for. I would also suggest joining fertilityfriend.com I did not personally use the site but I have friends who did and from what i understand you are placed in a group with other women who are trying to conceive at the same time you are and you all support each other and help with questions, etc. For me IVF was quite stressful but when it worked it felt worth everything I had to go through. Good luck.

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L.F.

answers from Austin on

Hi,

I haven't been through IVF but I did give birth to my two sons at age 38 and 40. A friend of mine had IVF and ended up having two children at ages 39 and 41. All four babies (mine and hers) are beautiful and healthy!! I did have the first trimester screening, where they measure the fluid at the back of the neck. Then had ultrasounds at 18 weeks to verify everything was ok. Good luck! And yes, I've had friends that have gotten pregnant with one IVF try. I wish you the best.

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D.S.

answers from Houston on

I also can't respond to IVF questions, but I did have a healthy boy at 44. I wish I could do it again. I did do the amnio...and had no problems with that. I will say I had a wonderful doctor who never really made a big issue of my age. Our genetic counseling session also helped alot with our questions.
I know there has to be someone who can talk to who will help ease your concerns. I'm sure your doctor can give you some recommendations.
Good Luck..
P.S. my mom had me when she was 43 and that was way back in the dark ages!

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C.S.

answers from San Antonio on

J. - I am a gestational surrogate so my experience of IVF is a little different. I am now pregnant for the fourth time as a GS and each time the IVF was successful the first time. I was 36, 38, 40 and now 42 with each IVF cycle, and never lost one. i delivered twins the first time, a boy the second and third and I am now 16 weeks with another one.

The age of the mother's eggs varied, but I carried for a couple in 2008 and the mother was 37 when we retrieved her eggs. I am carrying for them again and she was 39 at the time of retrieval. Her eggs were great quality although she did not produce as many eggs as the younger mothers I carried for.

One test an IVF doctor can do before implantation is PGD - preimplantation genetic diagnosis. It is a bit risky because the doctors have to insert a needle into the growing cells and extract DNA, which in turn can cause fragmentation, but some parents choose to do this so they know their baby/babies are healthy.

As long as you are healthy the chances for a successful IVF are good.

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R.N.

answers from Houston on

I had my oldest daughter at age 30 with IUI. When we started trying for #2, IUI wasn't working so we went to IVF. My 'fresh cycle' didn't work b/c they had a really hard time getting my hormones to come up enough in time to do the transfer. It was very disappointing b/c of course they used the two absolutely best-looking embryos that we had for that cycle. I went back a couple of months later and did a frozen embryo transfer. My doctor was much more optimistic about this b/c he knew with a frozen cycle, he had as much time as he needed to get my body to the right place hormonally. It took about 2 1/2 weeks of shots, but finally I was ready and they thawed the embryos and did the transfer, and sure enough that cycle worked and I had another little girl just before I turned 33. Both daughters were fine & healthy. After that, we talked about doing another transfer (I still had embryos), but my dh really didn't want me to do all the hormones again. I had pretty much resigned myself to stopping at 2, when lo and behold, at age 37 I found myself pregnant. What a shock! We did the blood test and it came back with a 1 in 40 chance of our 3rd daughter having Down's. I freaked. My husband and I discussed what we would do if she did have Down's, and both quickly reached the conclusion that the answer was nothing--we would have the baby and do our best for her. B/c of our decision, my OB/GYN recommended NOT doing an amnio. We had a high-level ultrasound with the neck-fold test and our perinatologist said everything looked good--he could see nothing to indicate Down's. Sure enough, she was born perfectly healthy and no chromosomal disorders. I guess what I'm saying is that your risk goes up with age, and it is possible that, after testing, you will find yourself faced with a 'what if' scenario. You and your husband need to make decisions NOW about what you would do in any eventuality. You need to be in agreement about how you would handle an abnormality BEFORE you are faced with it. You can certainly get pregnant and have a perfectly healthy baby at your age--the fact that you already have children is a big plus in your favor. Just make sure you are prepared for ANYTHING. Good luck!

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T.P.

answers from Houston on

I was 35 when I went through my first IVF cycle and had twins at age 36. I think the hardest thing for me was all the hormone shots because I had to mix hormones and I stressed about getting the dosage right. I wanted to do everything right to ensure I got pregnant. The trigger or HSG shot was not bad and hubby gave me the shot in the hip. Considering he had no experience with it, he did a great job. I would say relax, don't stress about the shots. I gave myself shots in the stomach for days. I would also suggest finding an OB speciallizing in at risk (ever 35 or multiples).

As far as birth defects, when they harvest your eggs, they get the best candidates to implant. I had advanced ovarian aging for my age and I think the fact that they do use the best of the bunch so to speak, reduced the possibility of defects, imo. I still have 5 embryos left and have started the process of donating them.

I wish you luck with it.

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K.T.

answers from Austin on

Hi J.,
I have not been through fertility treatments, but I have had a baby at 41. It was my easiest delivery. You are not too old to have a baby at 40.

Because you have had other babies, when you get pregnant your body will naturally know what to do and all will be well.

As for birth defects, I did an amnio and prayed for the best. My best advice would be to remain positive and eat right and be healthy and if this is meant to be, it will be.

Good luck to you and your hubby. You sound a wonderful person and mom.

K.

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J.H.

answers from Houston on

You would definitely benefit from a support person--especially if you are just getting started in this process. It is not for the "weak of heart"--and often times (like for me) pure persistence and determination are the only ways to get to the end result that you are looking for.

Resolve has a great support network...but it is also nice to share and connect with friends who may be going through the same thing. Do you have any friends going through fertility treatments? Where do you live?

I also received a great book "Getting Pregnant"--that does a pretty good job explaining everything in the fertility world.

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E.B.

answers from Houston on

Never had to do IVF altho I did use Clomid for my three. I had my first at 36, second at almost 40 and third at 42. The fact that you have had healthy children before is a good sign. There are higher risks of anomolies as you age- although some of that is attributed to the fact that fewer women used to have babies at that age- so maybe it wasn't a truly representative percentage. I had amnios with all three with no problems and was reassured knowing that genetically these babies were good. There are no guaranties in life- with three kids you know that by now!- so I figure the amnio covered the basics, everything else you just have to believe will be ok. I did just read a darling article in the Oprah magazine about eating to build a baby- what ingredients do you want to grow your child....interesting concept. Just go forward assuming it will all be ok- and things will work out. Good luck. (And I love being an older mom- it sooooo keeps me young and I am up on stuff that my younger friends are clueless about because their kids are grown. So much fun.)

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K.W.

answers from Houston on

Hello J.!

I am 47 years old and the mother of a 6 year old. After 20 years of being told I would never have a baby, I got pregnant at 40! (I had taken an over the counter medication for pre-menopause symptoms and it contained large doses of the hormone by body needed to allow it to get pregnant, though I didn't know that at the time.) We always refused "help" from the doctor as twins run rampant through my family and I didn't want to deliver 6+ babies at once due to fertility drugs. It was the most wonderful, most scary time of my life. I didn't believe the doctor until I heard the heartbeat :) In addition to the factor of my age, I am a smoker and was overweight when I got pregnant. Because I was an "AMA" (advanced maternal age), my doctor wanted to do an amnio and another test whose name I can't recall. The test whose name I can't recall would have given false positives due to my age, so we declined. The amnio had a very small percentage of miscarriage associated with it, so we refused to do that test. There was another test my doctor suggested that we agreed to, and if I remember correctly, it was called a Schedule II sonogram. This wasn't one of the 3-D shots of your baby in utero. In this sonogram, a technician studies the bones of the baby looking for abnormalities that would indicate Downs Syndrome. I ended up with pre-eclampsia (toxemia)and had to have an emergency c-section over 3 weeks earlier than her due date. She weighed in at 6 pounds 9 ounces, no eyebrows or eyelashes, still had some of the white waxy skin. Her APGAR scores were great.

Fast forward nearly 7 years -
At her physical last week, she weighs 51 pounds, 51 inches tall, which puts her at 98% in height, and about 40% in weight. She loves to read and HATES math.

I hope this information helps and good luck on your journey!

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B.D.

answers from San Antonio on

J., I'm glad you and your husband are trying for another baby. I've been through 3 rounds of IVF, all in my mid-30s, and have 3 beautiful, healthy children. My first round of IVF worked and we have a very smart little boy. My second round was a frozen embryo cycle and didn't work. My third round was a full cycle and produced boy/girl twins.
Michele's explanation was very thorough. The only thing I have to add is that the progesterone shots are a little painful. The oil is very thick and can leave welts in your hip/buttocks area. There is an option for suppositories and a friend of mine used them and they are a little messy, but not at all painful. You might ask your doctor if he will prescribe those instead.
We always had the pre-screening (quad test, I think) which came back negative both times so we chose not to do any other testing. Even if the quad test comes back positive, my doctor says that they return 50% false positives. You can choose to do an amnio after that, though.
Good luck with the IVF. It's a process, so stay positive.

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