Is My Marriage Salvagable???

I would like to start off by thanking those of you who have addressed this similiar issue in the past and I appreciate your imput and concern either way. I am looking to figure things out a bit in my life and I apologize if this takes a while to explain. (If you are in a rush I don't think you'll want to read this lengthy posting!) Anyways, to put things bluntly my marriage is seriously in trouble and I do not know if it is salvageable or even worth salvaging. However the bottom line is that for my children and all involved I really would like to fix and help the situation as much as I can. I know it takes two to work on any relationship and I cannot do his "work" but I am willing and interested in do my part and whatever I can beyond that. The situation is such: We are in a SERIOUS financial state with over $400,000 in debt (credit cards, student loans, personal loans, etc) and the stress of our finances spiraling out of control among other things, has made my husband become a VERY stressed, obnoxious, and hurtful/angry person. He constantly yells at me and often even is not nice to our two girls. He does not help around the house and he is a super-SLOB. He has told me numerous times that his job is to make the money and that he works hard so my job is to raise the kids, clean the house, make meals etc. However, I do all that (when I can) and work too. I tutor daily, teach a few times a week, and I do childcare several days a week. I am so drained. I have NO time for myself and I am barely staying afloat. I find myself yelling at my 3 yr. old when I get really stressed and then I am so pissed at myself for being a half decent mom (well, atleast according to my standards). I also started going back to school to change careers and try to make more income afterwards so either with or without him I will have enough to make ends meet. I really hate the yelling and the constant fighting. He tells me he doesn't trust me because I make "stupid" choices and that I am a "f***in bi*ch cause of a slew of reasons. I am seeing a private therapist through a domestic violence agency and I feel like the situation is not promising. I have tried everything. I see a anger management therapist with him since he claims I need to see him too. I really am going to do couples work since my husband thinks its about the two of us. I am ok with that but I really think his issues are rooted within himself. I am tired of being insulted and hurt emotionally and mentally but I REALLY REALLY would like to salvage our marriage. I have kids with him, we own a home together, and we live in a close-knit community where I know it'll be hard for me to remarry with 2 little kids not to mention I feel like it would just be better if he and I could work through these issues and live peacefully, even if it means we have to separate later when they are grown. I also had to deal with an incident this past Saturday afternoon where my 3 yr old asked for him to come take her to the bathroom (since she is feeling his presence not there - he never spends time with them - EVER) and he was sleeping. When I went up to wake him so he could come down, he said he was too tired and that I should go deal with her. I then pulled his blanket off and pulled his arm to get him up and he then dug his fingers into my arm and said he was acting in self defense. In the mean time, of course, my daughter peed on the floor and who had to clean it up??? Me, as usual. I know he is abusive and I am well aware of it but I am trying to get the help necessary to help the situation before throwing in the towel. I know he'll screw me with finances and although this situation is terrible taking on all his debt and not making ends meet will be worse hell not to mention that it'll be near impossible to find a decent guy to father my girls since we see there are so few of them. Have any of you been in a similiar situation that you salvaged? No preachy responses necessary, only constructive positive feedback please. Thanks so much for listening.