Is My 21 Month Old Boy Tongue-tied or Just a Late Talker

Updated on April 12, 2009
S.C. asks from Silverhill, AL
25 answers

My son is 21 months and makes lots of noises (he wants to talk) but everything comes out sounding like raa raa or naa naa. Everyone tells us he'll talk when he's ready and he does have an older sibling who is very verbal. Still, sometimes my husband and I look at each other, after trying to get him to say just simple words, and say what is wrong with him? My husband's sister was tongue tied -- she got her tongue clipped in kindergarten. If this is my son's problem, I don't want to wait until he is 5 to clip his tongue -- I think it will be less traumatic to do it now. We did take him to an ENT, who barely looked at him and said that he was a little tongue tied. I know doctors make their money doing surgeries and my son can stick his tongue out a little bit, so I have my doubts. The speech therapist thinks he is too young to work with and just suggested we wait until he is 2. I just don't want to regret not doing this surgery while he is young and won't remember and won't be scared. I also don't want to do the surgery if it is really not necessary. Meanwhile, my little buddy is earning the nick name raa-raa and getting very frustrated that we don't understand his language. By the way, his hearing has been tested and it is perfect. He is super smart, comprehensive & musical.
Thanks so much for any advice!
S.

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So What Happened?

Thank you so much for the advice! It is so nice that there are people out there to give you some perspective when you are at your wits end! Well, I still have no true answers but I am scheduling an appointment with my wonderful pediatrician to have a little heart to heart. Jack just so baffles me -- sometimes he says mama, sometimes it's baba and that's one of his best of 5 words. It's really that he has been trying so hard for so long (about 6 months) and it's not getting any better. I really felt under his tongue and compared it to his sister's and I don't think he is tongue tied -- he can make clicking sounds with his tongue. We are thinking it could be speech apraxia, after reading mother's experiences with it on this web site -- way too familiar. OMG it sounds so much like Jack -- we will see, I'll let you know and thanks again.

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T.A.

answers from Baton Rouge on

my son was a very smart baby but he didnt talk till he was 26 months old. He more than makes up for it now!

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T.B.

answers from New Orleans on

Don't be alarmed!! My nephew had the same probably him and my son are 6 days apart and my son was talking by 21 months but he wouldn't so a word! But just like people have told you give it time because when he does start talking he wont be quiet!! My nephew is now 30 months and he has a way better vocabulary than my son and remind you my son started talking first!! In fact he can say sentences and my son is still trying to put his words in sentences!! So just give him time he will come around, and oh yeah my nephew father has a very bad speech problem that did not effect him.

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B.S.

answers from Hattiesburg on

I don't want to alarm you but he could possibly be autistic. MMR vaccinations can cause autism, due to the thimerosol in them. He could need to have the phrenulem (sp?) clipped under his tongue possibly. Both could be considerations to explore.
B. S. RN CCM

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L.B.

answers from Fayetteville on

Hmm. Wants to talk. Is trying to talk. Can only stick his tongue out a little bit. Super smart. Hmmm.....

I wonder if there *is* a physical issue there. There's already a case pretty close in the family of tongue tie.

And waiting until your son is 2 is using up a lot of extremely valuable time, in terms of language development. I think the speech therapist must be the one who's a little too young to work with!! Anyway, at least your son is only a few months away, but I'd take him to a different speech therapist, and more like tomorrow, not in three months.

Get some second opinions. But while you're at it, don't be too worried about water under the bridge. The fact that your son is eager to talk means he is paying a whole lot of attention. I think that if he's tongue-tied and gets his tongue clipped, he will be raring to go, and his enthusiasm will more than make up for lost pronunciation. I bet those words are right there in his head. In fact, if anything, he will be ahead of the curve because he's been trying so hard. So take heart!!

Be very reassuring and encouraging toward your son. Just share his love of learning anything, and get the book BabyTalk - it's good for any kid, and tells parents and caregivers what to do at any age up to age 5. I think it's by Elizabeth Pantley. They've done research on the kids in the BabyTalk program, and compared them with the control group of kids. In each group, the babies/toddlers were a little to a lot behind. In the BabyTalk group, almost all of the kids ended up above average, and some even ended up in the gifted range! In the control group, the kids...well, didn't fare so well.

What I'm saying is, no matter what is going on with your son, he'll probably benefit enormously from the half hour a day playing with you, and it's very easy for you (or Dad, actually, or both, taking turns - whatever) to do. There are just a few guidelines for how to interact, and it's actually very natural.

But see another speech therapist, pronto, get that tongue looked at! Did you nurse your son at all? If so, did he have latch problems? Weak suck? Those are also telltale signs of possible tongue tie. Anyway, have someone look at it. See how far your son can stick out his tongue. Does it look a little short to you? And to a professional? Maybe get a lactation consultant to look at it, actually! Or a La Leche League volunteer to look at it! Ah. There you go. And they're free (lactation consultants and LLL volunteers). I bet that if you can just get 10 minutes with either sort, they can tell you. And you don't even have to pay a co-pay :) I'm sure that, even if it's not a nursing problem, these sorts, who care so much about the well-being of children, and want them to get the best possible start, will give you and your son 10 minutes of their time if it might help him to talk.

L.

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T.D.

answers from Tulsa on

My middle daughter was tongue tied, so I know how frustrating this can be. She could stick her tongue out too, but she always did it with the tip "stuck" on her front teeth. She learned to talk with it, and eventually it just broke around 2 or 3. When it did break she went from talking "cute" to normal like nothing had happened. Our favorite was she'd say chips "pthips". She's 17 now and her dad still tries to bribe her to say it that way again lol. My best friend's son was also tongue tied and his broke on it's own too. It doesn't hurt them when it does, probably because they tend to stretch it so much just talking, etc. My advice, give it some time. If he's not talking normal or it hasn't broke by 3 or 4, then think about the surgery. Until then, just be patient and encourage him to talk as much as possible. The more he uses it, the more it will stretch and eventually break on it's own.

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R.E.

answers from Tulsa on

My nephew was tongue-tied - it can run in families - and his tongue was clipped during his first year. He still didn't start talking until after his second birthday. My mother-in-law used a Pez dispenser and let him pull a pez every time he said a word properly (like "please"), and he got the hang of it pretty quickly.

As for doctors - if he [or she] is a good doctor, he will not recommend surgery to line his pockets. You can always get a second and third opinion, but my husband and his whole family are in nursing, and he's now in medical school, and it always makes me sad when people are suspicious of doctors because most of them are good people who have worked really, really hard to learn what they must in order to help people.

My son is 19 months and has always had incredible comprehension, but he's only now starting to say some "words." I'm not too concerned because my mother didn't start talking until she was three, but then she spoke in complete sentences. Our son also didn't start walking until about 17 months, but he picked it up really quick! So, talking late is not a terribly great concern, in my mind, but follow your best judgment, because you know your child best.

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B.C.

answers from Alexandria on

My daughter didn't have any problems with her tongue, but seemed to not speak with the rest of the kids her age. I was never too worried about it because some kids just take longer, which she did. She was jabbering a lot but we had no idea what she was saying. We decided to do sign language with her which helped a lot with every one being less frustrated. At 3 she was talking a lot but only I knew what she was saying. We took her to a therapist who said that she was just having problems saying every syllable in the word. She is incredibly smart, but just has too much going on to sit and think about making sure the words are coming out right. She's been in speech for a few months and is doing great. I don't regret waiting on taking her into see someone.
I would talk to a different doctor if you are worried about the tongue issue. It will definitely but you at ease. As for speech, I would wait just a little longer. I don't think you'll regret not putting him in at 2. Good luck!

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J.S.

answers from Jonesboro on

My son will be 3 in may and he still can not say alot of words and stuff. if u are worried take him to his doc and have his hearing checked. cause when thay check the hearing at birth. is not nessacerily accuret that he will be able to hear right later on.

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C.G.

answers from Huntsville on

Hi S.,
I don't have a similar situation from my own experience, but a friend was convinced her son was slightly developmentally delayed-no one wanted to do anything because he had just hit 18 months and everyone told her it was "too early".
She took him to the Cerebal Palsey foundation (not sure of the actual name-I can ask her if you'd like just let me know) and they put him in a playgroup for kids who are just a little behind developmentally and she got a speech therapist who works with him once/week.
My point-she found someone who'd listen to her and didn't let them put her off. You are your son's Mother and are given "maternal instincts" for a reason. If you feel there is an issue there probably IS. My advice to you is not to let the medical "professionals" talk you out of taking action now.
My friend's son is also a smart kid who can communicate with sign language (she taught him starting at about 6 months) and since finding the playgroup and a professional who can aid him in communication he is MUCH more verbal both vocally and through sign-I know your son's case is a bit different, but I feel the principal applies.
I hope this helps and Good Luck with your Little One.
:-) C.
I hope

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M.B.

answers from Biloxi on

My 11 month old son Zach was born tongue tied. My husaband noticed it the minute he cried. It was cut at about one week old. We went to a ear nose and throut doctor. My husband was also tongue tied they did cut his a little later in life. I feel like the doctors should have caught that if that is the problem. Im sure you have asked. I was very scared to havr zachs cut but it only bleed like a minute and he didnt cry long. Best of luck, try and keep me posted. M., mother of a 4 year old little girl and a two year old little boy. Just moved to MS about seven months ago from MI

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I'd take him to another ENT and get a second opinion.

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S.B.

answers from Monroe on

I would talk to your dentist about the toungue tied situation. My 13 year old just had the proceedure done at the orthodontist office. He numbed the area and then lasered it. She had no problems with speech, but it was severe enough to prevent her from sticking her tongue out more than a tiny bit.
I would revisit the speech therapist route. In Louisiana, we have an early intervention program through the public school system. Here, you would make contact through the pupil appraisal department at the school board office. It is usually under the special ed. dept. You may want to check into this in your area also. Here, it is a free service.

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L.B.

answers from New Orleans on

In my Opinion I belive you are jumpig the gun here!!! My 16 month old....we can't understand her either but follow her signals and pointing. Most baby don't talk untill 2 21/2 even 3. my daughter can say ma ma and da da and nina- our dogs name is china! I really think
You should considering waiting untill he's much older at least 3 or 4 to make that decision. Now don't get me wrong if it is proven medically that he is tounge tide by all means don't wait. Good luck!

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T.G.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I'm not a speech pathologist, but my sister is and I'm sure that she would recommend a second opinion from another speech pathologist. She has worked with children that age and there is therapy that can be done. Also, I'm a dental hyienist and the dentist I work for just had a son whose tongue they have already had clipped. It is a pretty simple procedure and the sooner done the better.

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L.S.

answers from New Orleans on

My sister's son was tounge tied and trouble switching to solid foods as well as speach problems. We thought he was a picky eater and just didn't have a big appetite. It wasn't until she brought him to the dentist that they found the problem.
Don't wait! Even a "little" tounge tied can be a big problem. This is a time of critical social developement and developement of his internal organs. He needs his tounge free to have the best out come my sister's son is on daily shots now to catch-up.
Once you have adressed the physical problem. You and your husband will have to work on getting him to communicate with words. For example practice the word milk with pictures or the gallon when he is full. Then when he wants milk encourage him to use the word and listen for him to make the attempt before giving it to him. He may have trouble with the "L" sound in the beginig because he hasn't been using it. You look in the mirror and say milk slowly, then say raa raa and naa naa and you will see that the tougne comes more forward in the mouth beyond the teeth when you form the "L" sound. When you form the other sounds the tounge will stay behind the teeth, sometimes you can form these sounds barely moving your tounge at all. If he continues to have trouble look for a speach therapist.
Good Luck!

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S.J.

answers from Tulsa on

Was his hearing checked by an audiologist or just by the pediatrician or ENT? The reason I ask is because I have a deaf daughter and it is unbelievable what all she has achieved during her life, all because she had early intervention. She was diagnosed by an audiologist (or pediatrician missed it) and they even put her to sleep to conifrm their original diagnosis. She is now 17, a senior in high school and has been accepted to 2 colleges. She has been a cheerleader and played basketball for most of her school career. She uses her voice (even though she can't hear it) and reads lips and is mainstreamed in all of her classes at school. She began using a sign language interpreter in her classes in her sophomore year and that has been very helpful. I would encourage you to rule out a hearing problem with a licensed audiologist as soon as possible since they are more equipped for this diagnosis.

Good luck!

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D.L.

answers from Tulsa on

Get the tongue clipped. It is the current school of thought to not clip it unitl is "causes problems". I have several family/friends that have had it or have children with this condition. NO one regrets clipping, lots regret not clipping. Even if it is "minor" Get it done. then depending on where you live you can have him tested at no cost. Then if he is at a deficient for his age, they school system is required to provide services from birth on. so stay with it and keep seeking help until you are satisfied

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A.K.

answers from Tulsa on

There are two other things you may want to think about do you know for sure how good he can hear. Did or does he have a lot of ear inflection. Jeff had so many inflections that when he should have been hear to learn how to talk to did not hear it all. Also how much are you doing his talking for him, if he wants something do you try to get him to say it or just give it to him or does his big sister do all his talking. I would also take him to a good trustworthy ear , eye and throat dr to see about his tongues since it is a family problem.

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K.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

At my son's two year well baby appointment, his pediatrician and I discussed starting speech therapy for him since he was not talking. We decided to wait a little and sure enough, he was talking within the next month. His vocabulary just exploded. Don't worry just yet.

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M.L.

answers from Fayetteville on

Hi S.,
My son is 20 months old and only says a few words too. He does have some very clear words, but mostly he acts like he just doesn't want to talk. I have a friend whose son is about the same age and also does not say hardly anything. So I think it can obviously be quite normal. I hope you find that encouraging. I know it frustrates me because his older sister was speaking in complete sentences by this time. :)
M.

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L.H.

answers from Enid on

My son, who is now 26 months, was like yours at that age. He could only make a few sounds and I was very concerned. I had many friends tell me that their second child spoke later and to be patient. That wasn't enough for me! My pediatrician recommended that we wait until he was 2 to worry because many babies have a language "explosion" at that age. On his second birthday he was saying very few words but now that its been only a month he says over 30 words. I still have him signed up to be evaluated for speech therapy, just in case. Wouldn't you rather wait and allow your son to reach 2 and be old enough to try therapy for 6 months or so before putting him through a surgery? Have patience and if things don't get better after he turns 2, get more than one opionion before taking drastic measures like surgery. As an adult he wouldn't remember a surgery he had at 3 years old either, but it will still be h*** o* him. Read to him, speak clearly to him and don't demand he say words to get things- that just increases his frustration. He will develop a lot between 2 and 3 years old and in that year you will be glad you waited!

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T.P.

answers from Tuscaloosa on

Hi S.,
I'm a pediatric specialist physical therapist who works with lots of kids with speech delays and knows lots of pediatric speech therapists. There's actually a good reason they often prefer to wait until a child is 2. Most of their standardized tests can't be used until then. It's not that they can't do anything yet, but they can't get as much useful information until age 2. It's actually pretty common for boys to be late talkers...1 out of about 8 "normal" boys don't say a word until after age 2. Once they start talking, they catch up FAST! Your own pediatrician should be able to give you some advice about the tongue issue as well. Even if he's a little tongue tied, it may or may not be contributing to his speech delay.
Some things you can do at home now are to work on his face muscles by blowing bubbles, using only straw cups, playing with kazoos, and trying to get him to lick something (such as a lollipop). One recent study I read said that speech therapists HATE sippy cups because they contribute to speech problems. They recommend going straight from the bottle (or breast) to a straw cup instead.
It also helps to have him around other kids his age who are talking, either through a playgroup, preschool, or playing with neighbors frequently. Sometimes it's even better if it's something he does without you, because he has to learn to make himself understood. Parents are so good at jumping in to help and he doesn't have to work so hard!
The bottom line is, second opinions are never bad, especially if you seek out pediatric specialists. However, its perfectly OK to wait 3 months to see a speech therapist...you will not be hurting your son at all. Good luck!!!

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A.W.

answers from Mobile on

Does your son get dental check ups?
If so, on his next visit ask the dentist to take a look at his tongue.
My dentist told me that I was a bit tongue tied and that he could clip it if I wanted.
B/C it hasn't given me any real troubles I declined.
I understand that it is a very simple procedure.
Perhaps just a little numbing (local anesthesia)and SNIP.

Hope this helps.

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E.M.

answers from Texarkana on

Hi S., Let me tell you that I know what you are going through. I have a 3 yr. old son who only says one or two words. What we have done until he can talk is to use sign language. It makes communicating less frustrating for both the parent and the child. Your son is not to young to learn either. If you want to start with something you can find a "Baby Einstein: My First Signs" at any Wal- Mart. It is colorful and very helpful to start on a few simple words. I would tell you to keep looking for what is causing his speech delay but until you find the cause try the sign language and see if it helps. I know it has helped me and my son a great deal. Bytheway my son is autistic. That is why he only says a few things. Get your son all the help you can. God Bless You.

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N.M.

answers from Texarkana on

take him to his doctor first but my daughter was tongue tied and she is now 40 but I thought they would clip her tongue but they told me they weren't doing that any more cause it could tear later so they had me teach her to stick her tongue out till it stretch her tongue then we had to teach her not to stick her tongue out but it worked but she was younger when I discovered she was tongue tied she was only a couple of months old but I would check with his doctor cause they may clip his instead my daughter could not stick her tongue out passed her lip she could not suck a bottle I had to breast feed her which was what I wanted to do anyway but it probably won't take care of it self on it own so take him to your doctor cause he might need speech help and her older brother had to have that he wasn't tongue tied but no one could understand him but me and sometimes I couldn't good luck

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