Is It Normal for Me to Lose Intrest

Updated on September 11, 2008
M.K. asks from Roy, UT
41 answers

Is it normal for me as a new mom with my first newborn to lose intrest in breastfeeding? When I feed my son he always is still hungry so i have to supplement with formula. It seems like he is wanting to eat every 2 hours or more. I'm not sure how often is the norm. Any suggestions or comments are appreciated.

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So What Happened?

I appreciate everyones advice and encouragement. I forgot to put in my request that my little boy is only 3 weeks old. I am finding that I need to start finding time for me as well and then I won't be so frustrated. I am still currently breastfeeding. I just need to stay patient and enjoy the time I have with my son before I go back to work. I did post another request if anyone would like to respond to that one.

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J.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I highly recommend the book...Baby Wise. It saved my life!!! My babies both breast fed to a year...we wouldn't have gotten through the first few months without it:) A wonderful mom of 4 recommended it to me and it gave me sanity for breast feeding:) I must also note that both of my kiddos slept throught the night at between 8 and 10 weeks because of the suggestions in the book. Many Blessings, J.;)

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N.P.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I had a bit of the baby blues and they just gave me more progesterone to help balance my hormones. Worked great....if you are feeling too emotional....

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K.P.

answers from Boise on

His feeding schedule sounds normal. I say, feed him when he is hungry. I let both of my babies guide me when it came to feeding. I didn't worry about what charts and other people said were normal. Every baby is different. Being a new mom can be very frustrating, scary, nerve wracking and a whole lot of other emotions. Being sick doesn't help much either. Just relax and try to get as much rest as you can when baby is resting. My little boy was such a chunky baby and latched on a lot. Now he is 6 and starting to look like he will be as skinny as my husband was as a kid, and he still eats a lot. Just hang in there and don't give up. You doing such a great thing for him by breastfeeding.

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J.F.

answers from Denver on

My daughter is 3 months and still eats nearly every 2-3 hours... it is normal for an infant to need it that much especially when it is breast milk. At times the first few weeks it was every hour!!!
I think some babies like my daughter just eat more than others. Every baby is different.
BUT if you are not enjoying it regardless of the time, then you need to accept how you are feeling. I didn't enjoy it at first, but now it is the best part of my day. It is a time of bonding that I cherish very much. But I also gave myself a break and said if I didn't enjoy it, it would be better for both of us to move on.
You need to make you happy so you can be a happy mom for you little one.
All us mom get that you are tired~ so are we :)
But it does get better. It won't go away, but it does change into a tired you can better manage.

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M.S.

answers from Boise on

You are fine. I hated breastfeeding my first. First of all everyone kept telling me what to do. If I was out at my in-laws and he cried, they said I needed to feed him and wouldn't let up until I did. It was so completely frustrating. Also I focused on loosing weight instead of eating the fatty nutritious foods that he needed in the milk and so my milk became more like skim milk until it went to nothing. If you can't do it, then it's okay, you want to enjoy your son and not be so tired and frustrated. When I had the twins I absolutely loved breastfeeding them, but I lost my milk early because I had to have surgery, but during that time I loved it. I was more willing to stand up and say I knew what I was doing, instead of letting other people bother me :) Good luck and enjoy your new baby!

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S.P.

answers from Great Falls on

My sister would say keep it going.
I say go to formula. My kids were fine on formula and I knew how much they were getting and could relax about it. If you're already supplementing. I'd stop the breast feeding.
I didn't like breast feeding. I felt like a pacifier. LOL. Don't feel bad about it. Your child already got the best he can from the breast milk. Good luck!!!

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S.P.

answers from Denver on

M.:

It's no wonder you are frustrated and sick & tired of this routine...you are doing double or triple work! You are breastfeeding AND bottle feeding and not feeling the benefits of either one.

You don't say how old your little one is, but it's not unusual for breastfed babies to want to eat every 2 hours or so. On the other hand, by giving him a bottle afterwards you may have gotten yourself in a situation where your milk supply is diminishing too. It's worry feeding on worry and creating the very situation you didn't want.

You need someone to help put the pieces together for you: how old is he, how much supplement, how long has this been going on, is he gaining weight, if you could get back to plan A, what would that be.

As a lactation consultant, I'll admit to being biased that a one-on-one consult would help assess the situation and give you a concrete plan to go from.

If you haven't been doing the supplementing very long and you still have lots of milk, it may mean just learning some efficiencies in breastfeeding. But that's a pretty big if.

One thing I want to stress is that if you want to breastfeed (without having to supplement), it is probably still doable (depending on how old he is). Many people think if things don't go smoothly from the beginning, they can't breastfeed and that usually isn't so.

S.

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B.N.

answers from Fort Collins on

Yes. Everything your are doing is normal. If breastfeeding isn't working for you, it's OK for you to stop. That was the best advice I ever received when I was having difficulty breastfeeding. My Dr. reassured me by reminding me that we've got several generations of kids who were formula fed babies and they are just fine. You can still love, care and comfort your baby without breastfeeding. Once I let go of feeling guilty about not wanted to breastfeed, both my baby and I were so much happier. Feeding times became quicker and we had more time to play, bond and go about our day. Good Luck!

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A.F.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I haven't read the other responses, so sorry if this is repetitive. From my own experience, I was never very successful with breastfeeding. When I had my first, she was a little jaundiced and the doctor told me to supplement with formula each feeding so she would gain weight faster. He neglected to tell me that I needed to pump each time I supplemented to keep my milk supply stimulated and coming in strong. I never made it past 5 months with her and I supplemented more and more each time until I finally switched exclusively to formula with her. I never did have enough for her. I'm not sure how old your son is, but if it's still early enough, I've heard that you can stimulate your milk supply to come in more so you can still feed him if that's what you choose. Maybe contact a lactation consultant and see what suggestions they have. As far as eating every two hours, if he's a newborn (weeks old) that's pretty normal. Also, I had post partem depression with my first, but didn't know I had it until I had it again with my second. I was missing out on a whole lot of bonding and other joys that come with a newborn because I didn't know that's what was going on. So if you think you may have an issue with it, definitely talk to your doctor. When I had it with my second, I got on some medication (which I only took for a month - that's all I needed to "get over it") and it was like night and day with how I was feeling. Anyway... hopefully this helps a little. Good luck.

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N.W.

answers from Denver on

You have a TON of responses that I didn't read through, but I feel for you, sister :) Honestly, I didn't enjoy breastfeeding until my daughter was 3-4 months old... it seemed it was always something! Plugged ducts, her squirming and crying at the breast, bruised and cracked nipples! It is SO HARD. The hardest, most frustrating time of my life, those first 3 months. My daughter would want to eat every 90 min or so, and would take 45 min to bf... so you literally are bf 12 hrs or more of each day. It is totally normal. Hang in there! My daughter is now 10 months old, and I am really clinging to our bf relationship... I think especially because it was so hard in the beginning. It will get better... but probably not right away.

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J.C.

answers from Casper on

Every two hours is really normal. Breastfeeding is a supply and demand thing, if you don't feel like you are supplying enough, then let him nurse more to stimulate your supply. One thing that might help is to listen to him as he is eating. He should be actively sucking and swallowing as he is eating. If he isn't doing that he might be nursing for comfort. That really isn't a bad thing, but it could get worse later. I have found that if my baby isn't actively eating, I take them off the breast and give them something else to suck on (a pacifier). I know that this isn't widely accepted as the norm, but it has been a sanity saver for me. I love nursing but don't want to become a human pacifier. I also tell my friends who are becoming new moms, that the first 3 months are really labor intensive. You do a lot for the baby and don't get much in return. Once the baby starts "talking" and smiling at you then you start getting rewarded for your efforts. Breastfeeding can be a huge benefit for you and the baby, but there also comes a time (and you have to decide when that is) when you have to cut your losses and say that enough is enough. The most important thing as a mom to remember is to take care of yourself too. If you are sick or tired then you can't take care of the baby as you need to. Relax and take a moment for yourself and you might feel better. Gooc luck and congrats.
J.

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D.K.

answers from Denver on

My daughter had no interest at all with breast feeding. So I pumped with her and supplemented with formula back and forth. I did so for several months. She was small at birth and at first struggled, then as she got bigger just never really wanted to nurse directly but I did pump my breast milk for her for four months. Try pumping, even alternating it with formula.
All babies are different. Keep trying or contact your Pediatrician so maybe they can offer some advice or refer you to someone for help. Every two hours is normal with breast milk, formula stays with them longer but no much longer. Every two hours is pretty normal. They need the breast milk for as long as you can handle pumping or breast feeding so keep it up if you can and just supplement with formula.
My kids both took both early on.
Also when you pump you can visually see how many ounces your son is taking in breast milk too to help you maybe figure out why he is still hungry.

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S.S.

answers from Provo on

A newborn does want to eat every 2 or 3 hours. As long as you can nurse him, the better. That is the best thing for him. Something that might help is to think about what if he Couldn't nurse? Or what if he wouldn't nurse? You wouldn't have that very special closeness with him that only a mother and nursing baby can have. Late nights, yes, but try to enjoy it and create a little circle around you and him. This will only last for a short while, then it will be gone. And you will be glad that you put in as much effort as you did, and actually sad when it is all over. I have had 4 children, all breastfed. My last one was born with lung problems and had such a hard time nursing for the first 3 months. How I wished she would just nurse like my other 3 babies! But finally she did, and she turned out to be my longest nursing baby.
Good luck and just enjoy that sweet baby!

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K.D.

answers from Denver on

I know you've gotten a lot of response. I hope the last week has been better with the advice you got. I have to encourage you to get the book "On Becoming Babywise" by Gary Ezzo. We did it with all three of our kids. I was able to breast feed the first 2 to roughly a year. Baby 3 is 2 months and has been sleeping through the night for several weeks. Last night was 9 hours. It really is a life saver. Another big help we have used for sleep is the video "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp. DS #2 was the only one who really needed it, but it has been helpful with DD as well. Hang in there. It does get easier as you get into a routine. Instead of supplementing, have you tried letting someone else hold the baby and feed again in 20 minutes? It helped me when I wasn't making enough milk for my first. Congratulations on the new little man!

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C.E.

answers from Provo on

i often felt the same way with my first. and he has never slept well unless full. he's almost 5 now and still needs a cup of milk before bed and gets crazy during the day if he's over hungry. i just didn't produce much milk the first time around and even though i thought i was trying everything, i have learned over the years that there was so much more i could have been doing that might have helped my milk supply increase and therefore make nursing sessions more productive. so please take the advice of those who have already responded to help your milk supply increase. one thing i wish i'd done with my first was to use bottles with a wider nipple. they are more expensive, but they can be so helpful in training your baby to open wider and therefore get enough/fattier milk during breastfeeding. breastfeeding went so much better with my second and i think a lot of it had to do with him latching better. hang in there! and find someone to watch the baby for a couple hours so you can sleep!

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M.T.

answers from Denver on

Hi,
My baby boy is 8 weeks old and I went through the same thing. It is getting somewhat better. Jack was eating like every 1.5 to 2 hours. I was getting so frustrated and didn't know if I was misreading his hunger cues, if he was just really hungry all the time or if I wasn't producing enough. It is hard to say. I have kaiser so I don't have the same doc all the time - one told me I needed to supplement (that he wasn't getting enough) but his weight gain said otherwise (he had gained 4 lbs by 5 weeks). Another said he had reflux because the continuous eating was also followed by spitting up and crying (during and after feeding) and all night long. He is now on reflux meds and this seems to help (but every day I wonder if he should really be on them). I also struggled because a lactation consultant told me that I should feed on demand and the doc said that I needed to make him wait it out and get more scheduled with him. So now I do kind of both. I try to space the feedings out (I think I also got stuck in the routine of every 2 hours, so just assumed he should eat) to 2.5 to 3 hours unless he really starts crying, then I feed him. I have almost quit nursing so many times because i feel like I can't do anything (I don't like nursing in public and he is a total milky mess when he nurses) but it really is getting better. If your baby is gaining good weight and doing well (I'm not sure how old he is) maybe try distracting him around the 2 hour mark and see if you can extend it a little. This has also helped with nighttime feedings. He now goes about 4 hours for the first chunk of the night, then the feedings get closer together. The best advice I was given is that stopping breastfeeding is not neglectful and if you just can't handle it anymore, you can switch to formula. You will still be a good mom. Sorry if this was too much. Let me know if you want to chat more.
- M.

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J.M.

answers from Grand Junction on

I agree with what everyone says on here. I will add one other thing that I don't think was mentioned. It sounds like you might have a slight case of post-partum depression. If you notice yourself loosing interest in other things you once enjoyed or your frustrations getting worse, you should really go talk to your ob/physician/midwife about it. There is help for it, and it's not something you want to let go. I am really glad you are on here talking about your frustrations. Talking alone may be helpful. Your not a bad mom for feeling this way. I got very frustrated with breast-feeding too. Espeacially, at 2-3 am. What helped me was to pump and let my husband do one or two of the feedings a day for a break. My daughter is 6+ months old and I am still breast-feeding her. It's easier now that I have a routine.

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K.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

It is totaly normally for a newborn to need to eat every hour or two. With my last baby, I basically had to walk around shirtless for the first 3 months because she was eating so much! It's totally not uncommon to lose interest, but I'd really suggest not giving up yet. I gave up far too early with my son and still regret it to this day and he's almost 6! I would contact the local La Leche League or a lactation consultant for advice. Breastfeeding is really the best thing you can give your baby right now. Hang in there and remember that this will only be a short period of time in your life. Before you know it, it will be over and you'll be reminiscing about the wonderful bonding time you and your baby had during breastfeeding. I hope this helps! Good luck!

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K.P.

answers from Denver on

I had this same problem...trust me, they do eat every 2 hours and sometimes every 1! my little girl is 3 months and just started going longer without nursing at night, but still eats every 2-3 during the day. At night I have her where she will go 4-5 hours! awesome...i never thought that day would come.
don't give up, it's sooo worth it for them. this is also my first baby.
kim

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S.A.

answers from Boise on

My question is, how old is he? Is he falling asleep at the breast? Do you have enough milk? At first my little one would fall asleep at the breast. And wanted to eat every 2 hours and he took an hour to nurse. I thought I was going to die..well not really but I was very tired and very frustrated. I ended up going to a lactation specialist and she helped out a lot. Then a friend gave me a book that literally saved me from stopping breastfeeding. It was Becoming Babywise. I really suggest it. It helped me out so very much. Hope this helps you. Please do not give up breastfeeding, it is so good for you little one.
Take care. Blessings.

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C.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Everyone's level is different. Personally (and I got a lot of flack for this) I HATED breastfeeding. If my dd would have weaned I would have been done but she refused formula. So I nursed her through the first year. I made it but I look at it as "I survived" I didn't enjoy it. I didn't feel like I was bonding with my baby I just felt like I lost my mobility and I lost my breast, it was now food. Yes, I was struggling with PPD at the same time. But with my personality, I also know that I just didn't enjoy breastfeeding. Plus my dd tried to use me as a pacifier not just because she was hungry. I learned to tell the difference. (that was hard but you do get to where you can tell) So many of my friends and other mom's I talked to were appaled that I would say I hated breast feeding. I don't particularlly love the newborn stage either. I loved my dd because she was mine but when it comes to holding a newborn, I'll pass. they have cute toes and I'm done. Give me the 6 month old any day...or the 2 year old even better. lol. anyway I guess I am trying to say there is no "normal" if you are concerned about how you are feeling talk to your doctor. Post Pardum depression can hit any time in the first year after having your baby and there is nothing shameful about having it if that is part of what is going on. there is lots of good advice on here so I won't go into any of that part of it just to tell you that Normal is overrated...who decides what it is anyway? what is best for you and your baby well that is what is best for you and your baby.My dd is 2.5 now and I still don't have fond memories of breastfeeding but I can look back and say yup, I did that, and it was hard and I survived.

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T.W.

answers from Salt Lake City on

hi M.,
i don't understand are you losing interest or do you think baby is losing interest? a newborn needs to nurse 8-12 times/day (minimum)that is absolutely normal. if you limit feedings or schedule feedings, your milk supply will begin to slow, baby won't gain enough, you'll be recommended to switch completely to formula. if you are supplementing in between with bottles, then baby may realize it's easier to get milk faster without work from a bottle, and lose interest in nursing at the breast. if he seems hungry or wants to suck, baby should do all his sucking at the breast. if you want to continue with success in breastfeeding, i'd cut out the bottles, except when absolutely necessary, like if you're going to be away for several hours, in which case i'd pump. formula is doing him no good. i would also recommend getting support from other breastfeeding moms through a La Leche League meeting, you can find one near you at llli.org. congrats on a new baby, and on giving your baby the best start with breastfeeding, hopefully you'll be able to continue nursing him and enjoy that part of your relationship with him.

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D.T.

answers from Denver on

There really isn't a normal but there is a range of normal. Relax. Make this your quiet time, read a good book, nurse laying down and relax a bit, watch a good movie a bit at a time. If you're really concerned talk to someone at la leche league

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A.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

M., I don't know of much that makes you more tired, and frustrated than being a new mom. There are so many unknowns, unexpected things, worries and frustrations that come with it. You are not alone and don't feel bad for any of it, be open and honest and don't hold something in. Chances are that EVERYTHING you are feeling is normal and 99.9% of everyone else had felt it too.
I am pro-breastfeeding, it has many advantages. However, I will also be the first to tell you it is really hard, especially in the beginning. It takes a couple to a few months to get it all figured out and get a little regulated so it is not so uncomfortable. Newborns to seem to eat every two hours. My babies seemed to eat every hour for the first month or so. Breastfed babies eat more often than formula fed babies since formula takes longer to digest than breast milk, thus they eat more often, thus formula might seem to settle the baby longer.
Of course I am just a mom and so far my two kids breastfeeding has worked out. I stuck with it, got past the uncomfortable parts and things have worked out. My advice would be to stick with it. However, if there is a case that you are not producing enough, even though you are trying. I would talk in depth about it with the pediatrician and figure that out there. I am sure with tracking your babies weight and such they can see if he is getting enough just through breast feeding.
Although the way to get your body to produce more is to demand more. Letting the baby suck even when there is nothing, is productive... it tells your body you need more. Also, drink drink drink... water. Making milk takes a lot of water, also feed yourself. No worries about losing weight right now. You also need the calories to produce milk. Not like tons extra but don't cut out normal healthy meals.
So talk to the pediatrician about wanting to produce more so you don't have to supplement. How to do that, while making sure your baby is getting what he needs at the same time.
But if you can, stick with it... it only gets easier.
By the time they are 5 or 6 months they start eating baby cereal, then baby food.. and nursing gets less and less. So it is hard at first but gets easier I promise.
Good luck, I hope it all works out the best. Enjoy your little guy... and take advantage of help from others when you can. Sleep is good for sleep deprived new mommies.

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H.F.

answers from Pocatello on

It sounds to me like breastfeeding is not the real problem, I think you may have some PPD (depression) and that you should talk to your doctor about it. Don't just go on meds and go on with life exactly as before however, you need much more than some pill can give you, you need someone to talk to someone and get some attention. Get counceling or talk to a good friend every day, get a massage (insurance can cover part of the cost if you go to a maasge therapist in a chiropractor's office) it realeases endorphins and helps you relax ans de-stress. Find a play group that you like so that you can spend time with other moms who have been there. Take care of yourself and then you will enjoy taking care of your baby. Good luck, get the help you need today!

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C.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Hi M.,
I totally understand. Oh my I have been there. I promise it gets better you will get feeling better. It is normal for a new born to want to eat every two to three hours. Try to stretch it out to 2 1/2 then 3. I have a recourse that has been heaven sent for me that helped me figure this all out with the eating and sleeping A book called " Good Night Sleep Tight", by the sleep lady Kim West, and Joanne Kenen. I have referred back to this book time and time again. Take care, and you will sleep again. Oh and one more thing I learned after many painful breast infections. Let your nipples dry before putting pads or bra back on.

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K.J.

answers from Salt Lake City on

two hours is normal, and your normal. When your baby goes through growing stages, he'll want to do nothing more than eat and sleep, depending on his age. There are women who say that they love the closeness with their child, but i don't feel like that's how i bond with my baby. he might bond a little that way; but, i believe that it's when you spend time singing, playing, and talking to your baby that matters. so do what's best for you, and know that you're ok. :)

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M.B.

answers from Denver on

Newborn breastfed babies eat every 90 minutes to two hours, that is normal, it is supply and demand and your baby is ensuring you build your supply. Stop supplementing now. Here are the positives of breastfeeding: 1)You burn a ton of calories(500 a day more, the equivalent of running about 8 miles). This will help you lose weight fast. 2) Your body produces oxytocin when you nurse which is a feel good hormone that helps relieve strss and promote bonding between you and the baby. 3) You will save about 2k that you won't spend on formula. 4). Your baby will be less prone to illness, particularly ear infections and other typical baby illnesses( and again saving you money by not having to pay the co/pays at the Dr. as well as meds. If your baby is latching successfully and you can do it stick with it, they willeat real food at about four months( cereal), baby food at six months, then more of a variety of foods and not be so dependent on you.

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L.L.

answers from Missoula on

I know it seems like that is all they do at first is eat, sleep, and eat, O and poop of course. I was told to feed my baby girl everytime she is hungry, so I did I feed her all day long and night, it was hard for me because we had gotten thrush and it hurt so bad to breastfeed and eventually like a month old she wouldn't take to me at all so I was pumping and giving her the bottle everytime, that got annoying, but I promise you no matter how you feed your new little whether it be breast or formula just feed him all day long, he will be a much happier baby. I had a mom tell me she kept a schedule and fed her first every three hours like "they" say to do and her baby was a fussy and cranky baby, I did just the oppisite and fed my baby ALL the time even if it was one hour inbetween feedings and still to this day 15 months old now and still very happy unless she is hungry. But don't feel bad about stoping breastfeeding, formula really is good for them and you gave it a go for two months that is a healthy start.

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E.B.

answers from Provo on

I just wanted to say amen to everyone else. Every 2 hours is normal. The only other thing that I wanted to say was that for my first baby I was frustrated, tired and sick of having to feed her so much, then I went and saw my ob/midwife and talked to her about it. We came to the decision that I had postpartum depression or baby blues. I got some help (zoloft) and things got a ton better. Now I am on my second baby and we started to meds before the baby got here and things have gone ever so much more smoothly. I would just mention your frustrations to someone just to see what they say! Good luck and don't give up just yet!

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K.W.

answers from Boise on

M.,
Anyone would lose interest in something they have to do every 2 hours! Do you have a pump? YOu may want to pump out some milk to see what kind of consistency is. My SIL only produces "skim" milk and her babies just can't survive on just that. But mine was always like cream. So maybe that would shed some light onto why he seems hungry still.

Also, the BEST book I ever read was "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" by Tracy Hogg. It changed everything for me. I felt more in control, and my babies were happier. Check it out if you haven't already. Because if your milk is fine, then I'd say you are feeding him too often. And that is causing him to fuss or whatever that makes you think he's hungry again.

Good Luck!

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J.W.

answers from Pueblo on

Before I had my first, I thought breastfeeding just came naturally and would be easy. It was very hard. I was lucky to have joined my local La Leche League group and got LOTS of support. Feeding on demand isn't just in books - some babies just need to eat and suck more often than others.
I encourage you to keep breastfeeding - the benefits are ENORMOUS, but if you can't, you can't.
Here are some websites that may help you -
www.kellymom.com
www.askdrsears.com
Good luck and enjoy that baby!

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R.K.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Mama,

You're baby doesn't need the formula. He's nursing the normal amount for infants. Remember, babies nurse for more reasons than the full tummy. Go get The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.

You're find things are going just fine for you and you'll find things won't seem so difficult.

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M.G.

answers from Denver on

Newborns need to be fed every two hours. You can have one 5 hour stretch (preferably at night). Breast-feeding is a huge commitment, especially in the beginning. You have to really want to do it to make it work. When my daughter was a newborn, it took her almost an hour and a half to eat, and then in 30 minutes it was time to feed her again! It is exhausting, and even painful in the beginning. But if you supplement with formula, you will never make enough milk. It is about supply and demand. The more you nurse, the more milk your body produces. If you have more questions, you should contact your hospital and ask to speak to a nursing specialist (lactation consultant). They are so helpful! Or find a local La Leche League group.

Good luck!

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S.T.

answers from Denver on

Anyone who thinks breastfeeding is simple and very intuitive, I beg to differ. I definitely needed help as did my kids. There were so many times in the first few weeks that I was in tears because they either didn't want to feed or they fell asleep almost as soon as they finally latched on (nursed a singleton for 10 months and then twins (with supplementation) for 11 months).

Nurse more frequently to bring to try to increase your milk supply. If you are like me, you might have to supplement. Once we got over the learning curve hump, I loved nursing and was quite sad when it was all over. My older son loved his pacifier so we used that if I thought he might just want to suck on something versus needing food. The twins never took a pacifier (much to my dismay).

I remember there were some breastfeeding support hotlines that you could call for support and encouragement. The benefits of nursing down the road for his health will far outweigh the frustration you are experiencing now. It does get better.

Hang in there.
S.

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C.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Breastfeeing is not easy. Everyone talks about how easy and natural it is and really it is hard and does not just come naturally. However after some time you will get used to it. Yes, it is normal for him to eat every two hours. It will change and he will go longer periods of time, but right now his stomach is tiny and he can't fit that much in there. Have you every signed up for babycenter.com? It is a very helpful website and you go read lots of good articles on topics such as this. I reccomend you give it a try. With my first, I cried for the first few weeks because I had such a hard time, however I ended up nursing her until she as about 14 months, when she started to ween herself. Good luck and hang in there!

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J.O.

answers from Boise on

I was going to recommend Kellymom.com also, it is great for breasfeeding questions. BUT I can tell you that breastfed babies will eat every 1 1/2 - 2 hours for the first few months and then it will slowly cut back. I know you are tired but you are giving the best to your baby.

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H.W.

answers from Denver on

M.,

Breastfeeding can be difficult, especially when you get mixed messages from the doctor, friends, books, lactation consultants. Ultimately, the lactation consultant who responded is going to be more correct than your doctor who is not trained in breastfeeding. Babies do eat 8-12 times/day, and sometimes more during the few days of growth spurts every couple months, early on, and breastfeeding operated on a supply/demand principle. The more your baby eats, the more milk your body makes.

Please, please, please contact a local La Leche League leader and group,http://www.llli.org/WebUS.html, so that you can get support from other mothers going through the same thing you are going through. Also, consider going back to the lactation consultant you saw before or meeting with another one.

It sounds as if you are uncertain you are doing things "right" for your baby. You are doing fine, mama. You are asking for help and information. It is normal to feel overwhelmed. But, the support you gain from meeting other moms and getting accurate breastfeeding information from a La Leche League group will help you feel more confident in your body's ability to feed your child and in your ability to therefore parent your child. I know I became a better mother through working with my son and his needs through breastfeeding. It is completely worth the effort, but support and knowing you're not the only one going through this hard time, and learning that you can be and are the expert on your baby, is essential.

Also, you say you are sick in your description. If you are also fighting a cold or something that is more of a constant in your life, it is absolutely essential that you take care of yourself. Good luck!

H.

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L.H.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I haven't read the other responses, so this may have been said already. All three of my boys would want to eat every hour and a half at least until they were about four months old. How old is your son? A lot of people will tell you that three or even four hours between feedings is normal and that's how often you should feed your baby. Baloney! (or bologna, however you want to spell it:)) As he gets older he'll go longer between feedings. Stick with it for as long as you can, because if you stop breastfeeding out of frustration you're going to be fighting guilt later on (believe me, I know from experience). Good luck!

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J.F.

answers from Colorado Springs on

There were days, when my daughter was having a growth spurt and needed to nurse and nurse and nurse, when I couldn't even get out of my pjs. It gets better! She had a short time, at nine months, when she didn't want to nurse (this coincided with my giving her a little formula at the doctor's suggestion), and when I stopped the formula, she wanted to nurse again, and we kept on until she was ready to stop at 2 years and 3 months. I never thought I'd go past a year of nursing. Get support from La Leche, and maybe for the blues (a lot of us have been there and really understand--this is a MAJOR life change, but you will make it through) and whatever your decision, don't guilt yourself!! Good luck, mamma! Wishing you the best.

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R.A.

answers from Provo on

Breastfeeding a newborn can take a LOT of time. Technically they should be nursing every 2 hours to get at least 12 feedings in each day. With my first I noticed that I was nursing him so much that some days it felt like that was all I did. I started putting in my favorite movies, grabbed a jug of water (the one they gave me in the hospital)and I sat down in a comfy chair and just let him nurse, for as long as he wanted. He wouldn't let me read books, or anything like that. The second I pulled out a book or a magazine to read he would try to look at that rather than nurse. But to answer your question about nursing frequency, nursing every two hours or more IS normal. But as he gets older it WILL get better, so try to keep at it. I promise that nursing will be one of the best things you can do for your baby. To be able to succeed will give you such an empowering feeling. I exclusively nursed my first three, but started loosing my milk when my fourth was between 2 and 4 months old and I can't tell you how horrible that was for me. I felt like it was somehow my fault, and that I just wasn't able to give her what she needed, and what I wanted to give her. Not cool. So please keep trying. :)

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