Is It Just Me or Is This Really Rude?! Text at 4Am!!!!

Updated on November 27, 2010
K.K. asks from Fredericksburg, VA
29 answers

Hi ladies,

Happy Thanksgiving! I was having a good sleep (hard to sleep a few days before my period) and I jumped out of my sleep because someone sent me a text at 4:41am!!!! I don't have any kids or a husband, but it sure as heck woke up myself and the dog. The person knows I only keep my phone on for emergencies (ie brother's a firefighter) and in case someone does break-in, I have the phone on already if needed be. Anyways, I just thought this was really rude seeing how some people do sleep during these hours. Granted today is Thanksgiving, does not mean I should be awake at 4am by a text.

The text read from a friend, "Wake the fk up!"....of course it turned into a nasty situation with him saying he's not going to talk to me and to shut up. I tried to talk to him again about it and he of course was all mad. He basically said it would be funny if he woke me up since I did not have work today and that he thought it was fine.

I don't know, it just doesn't seem respectful to me. If there was an emergency that would be a different case or if I was the type of person who doesn't sleep or is up that early for work, it might be alright.

Does anyone agree this was just plain rude of him?

Thanks ladies!
Katie

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So What Happened?

Hi Ladies,

We tried to talk about it a few times. He didn't see the need to really apologize. He got really frustrated. Long story short, we are still friends and he won't be doing it again. A few of my other friends have told me, he wakes them up too at odd hours.

Thank you all for the advice! I really appreciate it. I had to put him in place LOL!

Featured Answers

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

It was rude of him. It sounds like he had good intentions- he thought it would be funny,but it really wasn't. He used poor judgement. Forgive him and move on. Happy thanksgiving!~
M

5 moms found this helpful

C.W.

answers from Las Vegas on

Oh goodness my friend tabatha loved to do that or walkie talkie me at 5am (I have boost)... Why did he get mad? That's RIDICULOUS! He sounds like a drama queen lol.

4 moms found this helpful
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A.C.

answers from Boston on

Absolutely disrespectful! The time of the text was rude enough, but the fact that he refused to talk to you about it and told you to shut up, indicates someone who has no regards for other people. Especially if he though it was funny. Also the fact that he is getting mad is a classic sign of someone who may end up abusive and controlling. He's trying to make you feel guilty for HIS actions. This is a person that I personally would choose to not associate with.

2 moms found this helpful

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Good grief... what is your alert set to?

I text people in the middle of the night all the time... if I need to pass on a message but don't want to wake them up by phoning. Texting is the: I don't know if you're busy, asleep / it's not that important OR I'm super busy and can't phone right now... but I want to reach out for x, y, z reason

8 moms found this helpful
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K.U.

answers from Detroit on

It was poor judgement on his part, considering your situation and why you keep the phone by your bed, and I can understand why you would be annoyed. And it is rude and immature of him to be unapologetic about it, but you did not have to answer the text either - what the heck was your response to his text? Do you think it might have made the situation worse? Personally, I would have just ignored it, and not said anything. Maybe now, if you cherish his friendship, you should just apologize yourself and be done with it. If this was happening all the time I could understand having to say something, but if it's just a one time thing, I would let it go.

7 moms found this helpful

K.N.

answers from Austin on

It was inconsiderate... However, too silly of a thing to mar a friendship over.

6 moms found this helpful

L.M.

answers from Dover on

I definatley agree that it is rude to contact someone at 4 am unless it was an emergency or pre-arranged time. On the other hand, an emergency should would certainly justify a telephone call (not a text) so you could silent your text alert so they don't wake you up at 4 am.

6 moms found this helpful
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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Just a harmless prank by a "friend"? Annoying, to be sure but try to put it into perspective.

6 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

This is why they always remind people, Never Text when drinking! Hee, hee.. He needs to grow up..

5 moms found this helpful
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C.T.

answers from Columbus on

I think the rudeness depends on the receiver's established "rules". For some people your friends actions would have been okay. Obviously, you feel that his actions were rude. The problem is more his lack of respect when you addressed the issue. He should have respected your feelings instead of acting immature. He sounds like someone you shouldn't be bothered with anyway is he thinks things like this are funny. I know I would not find that funny in the least.

5 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Absolutely rude! Especially since he knew you would be sleeping in on a holiday. I refrain from texting at odd hours for this very reason. I would be pissed at his "funny" reason too, but then again, only my children have ever gotten away with waking me up at all hours!

5 moms found this helpful
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E.M.

answers from Johnstown on

I agree with DVMMOM...it was very poor judgment on your friend's part, BUT you could have had your text announcements set to silent or vibrate only. Also, you didn't have to respond to him. Be the bigger person and apologize to him, forget about the incident and continue with your friendship as it was. Life's too short to let something so stupid get in the way of a good relationship.

5 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

It was just a text.....Gees now you are both in lousy moods for the day. Why did you answer it? It's a pretty petty thing to be fighting about.

I leave my phone on vibrate or turn the sound off all together....it is still fully functional with no sound.

5 moms found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

I agree with Molly S. It was rude of your friend but it doesn't sound like he meant any harm by it. Tell him you're sorry you got so upset and ask him not to do something like that again. If he is a good friend he will apologize back to you.
The two of you shouldn't be fighting on Thanksgiving, enjoy your day!

5 moms found this helpful
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L.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

Was he drunk when he sent the text? Sounds like a drunk booty call to me.

4 moms found this helpful
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D.F.

answers from Boston on

Sounds like drunktexting.

4 moms found this helpful
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D.B.

answers from Chicago on

Super rude! Sounds like he was out having fun the night before Thanksgiving. lol I remember that night well....back when I was single, and had no kids, and didn't have anything to worry about but what time I needed to be at my mom's for dinner...lol. Not making excuses for him at all! I remember getting (for lack of a better word) "booty calls" from boys at that hour.... they didn't think anything about it..because they were still out from the night before. I'm sure once he wakes up tomorrow and finds out what he has done, he will be very sympathetic. So, yes it is rude but if he tells you he is sorry...move on, and don't let this ruin your friendship.

4 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Dallas on

It does not bother me when people text me really late or early. I friends in different time zones and get texts early in the morning. I would just turn off your text alert tone. If it is an emergency then they will call and not text.

4 moms found this helpful
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M.H.

answers from Atlanta on

Absolutely! Not only is it rude but it's just plain nasty!

3 moms found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Houston on

Rude and annoying, though take it for what it was, a dumb joke. I like the idea to text him in the morning at the same time he texted you. In the future, just ignore it. My husband has an emergency phone for work as well that pings every time he gets a work email. It goes off all night long, annoying, but it's just a tiny beep, so not enough to ruin your night if oyu choose not to entertain it.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

So your friend sent you a 4am text knowing you'd be asleep and thought it was a funny haha joke? Your friend is an @$$hole. But we all have friends who are like this, yeah? Send him a text that says "Dude! Totally uncool!" and shrug it off.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Do you really need this person for a friend?

2 moms found this helpful
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L.M.

answers from New York on

I don't text, so maybe this doesn't apply. However, I thought that a ring tone as in the phone ringing and a text alert tone were two separate things. The phone should be on, but the text alert would be off or silent. Did this friend actually know you were going to read the text at 4:00 am? If no, then what's the big deal? If yes, why do you want this type of person as your friend?

2 moms found this helpful
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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

I'd be more mad if it had woken my kids up that early. Take a nap! ;) it does sound like he likes you.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.W.

answers from Atlanta on

ur not on the same page - he thinks he's funny. I have had 2 guy friends that thought they were funny that sent stupid texts. Needless to say we no longer talk -no one's mad I guess I out grew the friendship / humor.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Did you actually TALK to the sender? B/c if this was just TEXTS---his phone could have been stolen. I got a text late one night telling me to get naked and send the picture to my friend (a female about 20 years older than me). Well, OF COURSE I knew it wasnt' from her! I called her home phone the next day and left a message. Someone had stolen her phone and sent the same text to all the women and girls on the phone. IF it WAS your frined and you spoke with him---just block his number. How old is he anyway--15?? You are right--it IS rude. Unless it's an emergency--no one should be texting at that time of morning!

1 mom found this helpful

J.S.

answers from Chicago on

Yes, rude. I think ignoring him would have been the best option. Too late now. Why don't you text him same time tomorrow?

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Victoria on

He was playing a funny joke at your expense.
ha Ha for him....you, not so much. Very Rude. Now with that said, if he is a person that you enjoy being friends with, well just consider it "on" now and when he lest expects it, play a funny joke on him at his expense and if he gets upset, remind him about his pranking ways.
If your not into pranking too much, this one is usually pretty good and isn't hard to get away with. Next time your with him and in a group, tell him he has **it breath, then ask if he brushed. When he says yes, you say, "omg I forgot to tell you! I was trying to get you back about the 4am text & cleaned your toilet with your brush, but I forgot to tell you!! Sorry Dude, that sucks! Everyone laughs but him and you get revenge, of course don't really mess up his toothbrush, just making him think about wether you did or didn't will make him buy a new one. LOL otherwise, let it go. Afew hours missed sleep won't matter in the long run.

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B.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Sounds more like he felt like you were good friends and he wanted to play with you a little bit. Sure it was rude, but did he expect you to play along with it and perhaps go out to eat breakfast with him or something?

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