Is It Good Decision If I Quit My Job Before Conceiveing?

Updated on April 20, 2017
N.T. asks from Andover, OH
15 answers

Actually in my first pregnancy, after 8 weeks I experienced missed abortion it was so devastating.
Now after 6 months of that we are planning again. But now situation is little change in my work environment. I worked in software industry. current project is very stress full. Hence I m planning to quit my job. Is it right decision??? Can anyone please help!!!

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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

Your office job is not the reason you miscarried. It could take a long time before you conceive again, so quitting now may a poor choice if you're currently used to the household income level. If you intend to re-enter the software workforce in the future, quitting mid-project may be a bridge-burning problem.

Do you plan on staying home with the baby after it is born? If so, do a trial run effective starting on May 1st by living without using the income from your job at all. I suggest this for all couples who are not yet parents but know they want someone to be a Stay At Home Parent after kids are born. Live on one income and bank 100% of the income of the person who will be at home. If you can do it, then you know you're able to live on one income and have a SAHP. If you can't, then different choices have to be made.

5 moms found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Anchorage on

The first time I got pregnant, I also lost the baby in the first 8 to 10 weeks. We decided to try again. It took me 3 years to get pregnant the second time. Just because you got pregnant easily the first time, does not guarantee a quick conception the second time around. What will you do with yourself for a long period of time if you aren't working? I hope you get pregnant again quickly, but please realize that might not happen.

5 moms found this helpful
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E.T.

answers from Rochester on

Trying to conceive can take months and even years of trying. Are you prepared to not work for an undetermined amount of time? Are you financially able to live on one income? It's possible that stress may have caused the loss of your first baby, but it is more likely that there was something wrong with the baby. Don't rush in to quitting your job. Take time to figure out if you can afford to quit your job. Good luck!

4 moms found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Sorry you lost your first. I can see why you would be concerned - if you think that with your particular job, it was so stressful that it might have impacted your pregnancy.

I myself would not quit. I was able to manage work life balance (working at stressful position) and it was the right thing for me. Pregnancy can seem like it goes on forever. I am home now and have settled into a routine that works for me, but if you like to be busy and have a routine, work can be very helpful.

It really depends on your particular situation. Maybe talk to your doctor - see how stress affects your body. Many women work up to the end - some with terrifically demanding jobs and do ok. Others not so much.

My best advice would be to conceive first - then decide after talking to your doctor. Best to you :)

3 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from Boston on

Nobody can answer this one for you. Its something between your husband and yourself. People work highly stressful jobs and have highly stressful lives and have successful pregnancies. Other's have no stress and don't. I don't think that your planning a pregnancy should have anything to do with your current job.

Just remember that if you are use to working you could be bored staying home especially if all your friends and family are working during the day. You won't be bored after the baby but you'll have a lot of free time before and it'll be a transition.

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M.S.

answers from Washington DC on

I also had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy at about 6-8 weeks and I also got pregnant after a very short time with that one. After that it took me two years to get pregnant and during that, I went through one of the most stressful times in my life with a very close family member getting sick and dying. That baby thrived and is a strong healthy boy now.

I guess my suggestion is to keep the job decision separate from the baby decision. If you don't like your job, look for something you might enjoy, if you can afford it. Work in a flower shop, be a dog walker, find a fun part time job you think you would enjoy. If you quit your job with conceiving as your only goal you may drive yourself crazy every month. Hopefully you will conceive quickly, but you just never know, and then what?

3 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

How will you spend your days? What will you do to stay busy? It could take months to conceive and if your not working and don't have a way to occupy your mind you could end up totally stressed over conceiving a baby. I know I felt like my days were very long once I had my baby and stopped working.

My first pregnancy ended up in a miscarriage too at 7 1/2 weeks. I know how devastating it is. Best of luck!

I'm assuming you can afford to quit, correct?

2 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

I think stress and conception are linked in ways they should not be. The idea that women should "just relax so they can get pregnant" puts all the "blame" for infertility on the woman. Everyone can probably name 1 or 2 women they know who got pregnant when they started to relax, but that's because it's so rare, it's notable. The vast majority of women get pregnant doing what they normally do - have jobs, run around chasing kids, caring for older parents, juggling life's stresses. There are lots of reasons why some women don't get pregnant when they want to, but working at a job is rarely that high on the list.

If a job was so stressful that you weren't eating reasonable meals and getting reasonable sleep, or if it made you too distracted to take any medications the doctor recommended, that would be another story. But still, anything could be a distraction in those cases.

I would think that quitting a job would bring more stress - you wouldn't have the income, and you would sit around the house focusing entirely on whether you are ovulating, having sex at the right moment, and whether it's too soon to try another urine test.

But no one here can tell you what to do. You need to look at your entire financial picture (including medical benefits), talk to your husband/partner, discuss with your doctor, decide why you are so anxious about getting pregnant, and look at other options to calm yourself. (I realize you want to and that you've had some disappointments - but are you creating more stress? What else can you do for that? Massage? Relaxation tapes? Counseling?) You need to have a plan in case you quit your job and then don't get pregnant in 3 or 6 or 9 months. What will you do then? Will that be less stress than your job and income?

1 mom found this helpful

V.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

No one knows the future.

Erica T is right... you can't know how long it might take to conceive again. You can't know for a fact that your work life had anything to do with the lost pregnancy. And we certainly can't know your financial situation to guess at whether it is prudent to quit your job. You're married? How stable is your husband's income/job? Can he support your family on his income alone? Is your medical insurance provided through your work?

Lots of things to consider, but none that we can know for sure to really give solid advice. If your financial situation is such that you are comfortable with just your husband's income, and his job is secure, and you have insurance, and you aren't in loads of debt, and your cash flow is comfortable on only his income, then maybe try living on just his income for a few months. Sock your entire paycheck into a savings fund and do not touch it for any reason. If you can do that without taking on any debt or delving into any savings or emergency funds, then you can probably live on his income alone, provided his employment/salary is secure and you have insurance.

Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

If you can live on your husband's income and still have everything you want then why work at all other than personal satisfaction?

If you can't live on hubby's income alone then you will have to work even after you conceive and after you have a child.

I would see what the OB/GYN says. Ask them if your work stress contributed to your miscarriage. If it didn't then you have no reason to quit I guess unless you just want to.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I wouldn't - and I didn't.
I was a Cobol programmer at the time and the job had it's stresses.
I worked through pregnancy - although they wouldn't let me move boxes of paper anymore - right up till delivery and then went back to work when my 12 weeks of maternity leave was up.
I think you are thinking that your job caused you stress that caused your difficulties.
Doubtful.
You could try years before conceiving - for everyone that conceives right away - there are plenty that take much longer - that's why on average it takes a year of trying before getting pregnant.
If you have no luck after a year of trying (6 months if you're 36 or older), then see a fertility specialist.
There are a lot of pluses to having 2 incomes coming into your household.
I wouldn't throw your job out the window just yet.

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N.T.

answers from Cleveland on

Thanks everyone for your guidance. Actually we are financial stable my husband has secure job n good salary. Its not abt him. I have same thought that's why never thought earlier during first pregnancy at that time I was having work life balance bt now we so much of work load due to demanding client that we didn't get time to drink water..So m very confused I don't want to loose another baby as well.in first time we concived in 2 months.

Updated

Thanks everyone for sharing n guiding me. It's helpful... 👍👍👍

1 mom found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

I would not quit if it were me. For both my pregnancies I worked until about the last month. You never know what will happen and I would not quit. I would however learn relaxation techniques and practice meditation and yoga breaths in order to teach yourself to calm your body down and let stress go. If you really and truly believe your job led you to have a miscarriage then you should wait till you conceive and then talk to your doctor about it. If you are someone who gets stressed easily and/or has anxiety I suggest also seeing a therapist.

1 mom found this helpful

T.D.

answers from Springfield on

i started a job. a christmas seasonal job at a busy and popular mall retail store. it was busy stressful and i rarely had down time (except for planned break times.) and i was preganant with my first. so i wouldn't quit a job for a pregnancy. just learn management skills to make it easier. ( at my second job i did change positions though as i didn't think a 7-9 month pregnant lifeguard could properly perform the job duities so i transferred to guest relations and first aid supervisor)

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D..

answers from Miami on

Can you afford to stop working? Will you have health insurance?

Did the doctor tell you why you miscarried? (Missed abortion is not how you say this.)

Stress is not necessarily the reason for a miscarriage. Stress does not necessarily keep you from getting pregnant. What does your doctor say?

I hope that you are taking pregnancy vitamins before tryiing to conceive. That's really important.

If you have not read a book about pregnancy and getting pregnant, it would help you.

Don't just assume that not working anymore is the answer to your problems.

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