Internet Access with Children

Umm... no, my son does not, will not, have that sort of access at anytime.

Are parental controls in place on all of the electronics? That's the first place to start. Second, devices should be out in the common areas.

It might be good to find some articles which support your opinion instead of just stating it. Find some information which explains to him the serious dangers of unguided, unlimited internet access. Sure, she may not be interested in chatrooms or social media at eight, but what about 12? or 15? Those later ages are when these concerns come more to the fore, and what will he plan on doing then, backpedalling? It's better to set the precedent that all electronics have parental controls and stay out in the open if they have internet access. It might also be good to put some controls on which allow him to track her access... if he disagrees, remind him that if she's not doing anything inappropriate, there should be nothing to worry about. It's just good common sense to monitor a child's internet access. Would you allow them to go downtown alone? It's almost the same thing, right--unlimited, unsupervised access to the 'net. Just my two cents.

We kept electronics with internet access in public spaces. We let the kids know we had the router or software monitoring them and why. We told them we mostly trust them but if we see an issue, it will be addressed. I think that he's short-sighted. Kids find things you don't want them to find, even just by accident. My SD had friends over when she was about 11 and an older girl showed them a chat room that our Net Nanny didn't catch. Fortunately the computer was in a public area of the house and DH caught on to what they were doing, shut it down, and told them why.

I think like so many things the internet is full of good things...with some dark corners. Teach them to use the tool, but keep the filters on. My SS was about 12 when he figured out how to use Google Images to find some...inappropriate material. Again, since it was in a public space, it was caught, discussed, and stopped.

Sometimes it's not that you don't trust your kid...but that your kid isn't the only person online. My uncle used to say, "I trust my girls. It's all the boys I don't."

And, from a stepparent's POV, is this Daddy Guilt? Does he not rein her in because she's supertrustworthy or because he's afraid to tick off his princess? Is he feeling like you're picking on his kid when you're just trying to look out for her?

One more story - my SD was allowed to download and play a game on her phone years before everyone had smartphones. Apparently that cost her mom hundreds of dollars. Even something "simple" can cost you. Literally. You need to know what your kid is doing. The time to be their friend is when they are grown and gone.

I agree to do some research on keeping kids safe online - from 8 to 18. You don't want them advertising where they go to school, or not having the privacy settings enabled on their Social Media of the Moment account, etc. Maybe if you both sat down you'll see what you need to do - as a household.

I would be more concerned at this point about her accidently stumbling upon something inappropriate. We use Net Nanny on our computer for that very reason, and I think that it is now available for i-products. One subscription usually covers 3 devices. Might be a good compromise for all.

My daughter, 6, had my old ipod touch with internet access for games and such and she can use it in her room. She also has a texting app on it so she can text her dad and grandma and me when I'm not home and she is with my mom. But, I also have the exact same app on my ipod touch and we both have the same user name so any texts she gets, also come to my ipod. As she gets older I'm sure I will allow her acess to a comp in her room, but I will also be putting a program on it allowing me to know everything she does. It's not spying, as some might say, it's parenting!

Both little girls and little boys have inquiring minds. It sounds like Dad is protecting her for she is the apple of his eye!
And I happen to agree with you. Yet there is a couple ways for you resolve this.
1. could be having your husband check her searches on that pod every now and then (Bi-weekly or weekly)
Explain to him that many kids this age play and search the internet and that although their parents trust them; the kids, especially girls may be gossiping, bullying (girls can be mean yet sweet) inappropriate viewing etc. And that checking her Pod is a means to secure what he Believes while also being an act to keep her safe!

2. You could and purchase a small video camera and set it up in a corner of her room---yes intrusive but offers real results.

3. I am not sure but there may be way for parents to log in to their kids accts--and you can always search and check that way. If she is as honest as he says she is then she should have no problem sharing passwords with her parents for security purposes!!!!!

Nope. Internet access for kids is only in full view of parents. For boys, for girls, for everyone. Has nothing to do with "do I trust you" to do what I asked and has everything to do with the fact that kids will be kids. They will get curious. Even good kids. And there is so much out there that leads innocent kids down tangled paths. I have seen over and over the recommendation that internet usage be supervised by parents, that kids know their parents will be "snooping" on what they do online. Just like you would watch your kids in their playhouse, playground, room.
Of course, we also have a no closed doors policy (unless you are changing clothes, showering, using the restroom) so...

I let my grand kids play on my phone all the time. I can check where they've been. It's not big deal to me. If I catch them doing something they know better than doing then they have consequences.

Kids do make mistakes. And yes, they should have supervision. BUT this is his child and he has made the decision to trust her, you have made the decision to not trust your child. You must let him parent his and you parent yours in this matter.